Meatbomb's profile (website)

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Name: Thomas Edward Topham
Joined: November 18, 2004

About

What's the deal with your nickname? How did you get it? If your nickname is self-explanatory, then tell everyone when you first started using the internet, and what was the first thing that made you say "wow, this isn't just a place for freaks after all?" Was it a website? Was it an email from a long-lost friend? Go on, spill it.

Hey there, if you are here... please have a look at my YT channel, trying to build up some steam on that thing yo!

January 21 2020---
Not gonna button, as I am sure some day I will be back. But after some disagreement with Cortex about my commenting style/participation on the site, not really sure this place is the right fit for me anymore.
---

OK so by the way, as my picture might suggest, I am a white man. I have spent the vast bulk of my adult life (25+ years now) as an expat (that's what educated white people get called instead of "economic migrant" or similar).

The reason I mention this is that on one hand, of course, I am an extreme beneficiary of privilege. But I have also spent a lot of time as a minority and outsider (but almost always an honoured and privileged outsider) in cultures where race relations and power balances are quite different from the default model in North America (and also the "default" culture of MetaFilter).

Me, in person, I have always been an asshole. I still struggle with race issues. I am very interested in seeing where the current (June-July 2019) discussion on MF will proceed, and whether this can become a truly inclusive space for not white people.

I say "not white people" instead of POC because I am intrigued about this idea of white people recognising their whiteness, and bringing that out such that it is not the default. Let's see what happens! Good luck guys, I like it when we have a diverse and world-spanning group here!


Character Sheet

No, stop caring about how people are arguing on the Internet! Bad Meatbomb!
Buhbye MF, back into read only mode for this place.
14 Jan 2015
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Well yeah I am here again full time now.

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I am not ready to press the big button, but it is time for trying to be less invested in this place. Let's see how long I can stay away.

Logging out! Buh-bye for now. June 20 2012

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Well, I sort of managed to escape temptation. I was almost going to publicly berate and whine and explain my absence at the end of this thread, but stopped myself before hitting post.

It takes a few days to get used to not being able to favourite stuff, and going to a purely reading mode does help to kill the psychological investment in this place quite quickly.

So I guess this could just be considered the mildest relapse. I did not even check recent favs or recent activity!

June 26 2012

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March 6 2013

Yeah, couldn't keep away... How long have I been back, two months or so??

*pokes at the window blinds, peers out*

Metafilter. I'm still on Metafilter. Shit.

_______________________

How may I serve you? There is nothing you need be ashamed of, and I love you unconditionally.

Good luck, good luck, lucky you because today is your special golden lucky day. Blessings upon you!

My real world name is Thomas Edward Topham. I am a teacher, mentor and priest. My Doctorate of Divinity is from the Universal Life Church - if you would also like to be a priest, I suggest you go see them for a hassle-free, no-questions asked ordination.

I had a blog called Questionable Things. I stole the idea for that name from Rutger Hauer's line in Blade Runner. I zeroed it out for some shitty job that I didn't want and couldn't keep. But the blog is gone!

My Metafilter sockpuppet is named Brave New Meatbomb. I stole the idea for that name from Aldous Huxley's novel. I am a brazen and honest thief - perhaps someday, I'll have an original idea, and that day will be my special golden lucky day!* I created my sockpuppet because I was temporarily banned from this site, and found it impossible to stay away. I love Metafilter, and I am very happy that I am here.
*Holy shit Aug 23rd 2017 12:37am I am claiming an original thought! My contribution to the human project is the concept of the void stash. All by myself I thought that up! Golden and lucky!



Meatbomb FAQ

Q: Why have you added me as a contact?
A: Because you are my co-resident, coworker, and sibling.

Q: Huh? I don't recall seeing you at my workplace or home.
A: We are on the same planet: that makes us co-residents. We are here together on MetaFilter, building the Singularity one comment and one link at a time: that makes us coworkers. And if you look closely at my profile pic, I am certain you'll notice the family resemblance... remember way back, when we left the Great Rift Valley and moved into those new digs in Central Asia?

Q: Would you please delink me, you are freaking me out.
A: Unclench, my sweet litter mate, why do you insist on finite and bounded love? But yeah, just ask, I am here to serve you.

Q: Can you point me to examples of you killing the conversation?
A: You mean, like, times when I joined what seemed like an active thread, in a timely manner, and suddenly everyone left, so I am just hanging there in the last comment? Certainly. Hereand here, for starters. There's plenty more, just haven't yet linked them here.

Q: Your account is 10 after the first $5 signup, so how can you claim to be the first $5 n00b?
A: OK, for the last time:

17578 - no account activity, nada, doesn't count.
17579 - with a name like "matt123test" it is obviously not a real account, and I would think that in a properly administered joint such an account would be deleted. Does not count, unless we want user #1 to be considered the first $5 n00b.
17580 - ditto above, this one is called matttest2. Does not count.
17581 - One comment ever, in early 2005. And an inane one at that. Surely we would not deem such an account holder to be an actual member of the community? Doesn't count.
17582 - OK, it gets a little questionable here, but would you consider a user who only ever answered questions in AskMe and who has not been around in over a year to be a member of the community? And even if you did, would you, my dear $5 n00b littermates, wish such a user to be your standard bearer? I submit that this also doesn't count.
17583 - only 16 comments over 5 years? Surely we can pass by this account without objections?
17584 - account does not exist. Doesn't count.
17585 - ditto.
17586 - ditto.
17587 - only 16 comments over 5 years, the most recent more than 2 years ago. Doesn't count.
17588 - Ooh, what do we have here? This is the first $5 account we have come across that has posted consistently since joining. There are posts and comments on all of the subsites, there is a user profile pic. This person posted in the actual welcome thread, on the day, and this person has even had ballads commemorating his exploits penned by cortex himself.

I am the first $5 n00b by any reasonable definition. And as is my birthright I claim the crown.

Q: In your profile pic you look like a Neanderthal mouthbreather - tell me something about your ethnic background?

A: Indeed I am, well spotted! 50% Danish (mother's side) and 50% English (father's side), Canadian citizen. I will never forgive my mother for missing the deadline some time in the mid 70s for getting me a Danish passport... I'd be in København right now instead of this fucking place :(

Q: What is the best thing you saw on television growing up?

A: The psychedelic animated shorts from Sesame Street are among the top 1 things:
12;
lost boy;
I remember;
That's About the Size of It, etc.

What makes these items so particularly excellent is not that they teach you how to identify clocks or phones, or to develop memory skills, or even to learn about funky pimps who can morph into living elephant / fountain / plastic homes: the mission critical bit is the subliminal message that when you grow up you should take LSD to make you a better person. Counting to 12 was great, but it was the "take LSD" part that I found the most valuable lesson from 1970s Sesame Street - muchos gracias Children's Television Workshop!

Protip for when the trip gets too intense: try to remember everything you passed, but when you go back make the first thing the last.

Tell Me a Bedtime Story, Meatbomb.

Ok. Have you brushed your teeth?...

The shepherd was on a remote hill, with the village just barely visible in the valley below, when the stranger arrived. He sat down beside the shepherd and from his bag pulled out his lunch and ate, sullenly, holding the scrap of bread tight to him. "And what brings you here?" asked the shepherd.

"I am looking for a new place to live," said the stranger. "Pray tell me, shepherd, what is that village like, in the valley below?"

"I will tell you of this village, stranger, but first I should like to hear of the place from whence you come."

The strangers face twisted into an ugly mask of contempt. "Thieves! Thieves and liars! Nobody can be trusted there, everyone looking out for themselves. People there find no joy in life except when bringing misery to their neighbors. And now, shepherd, I have met my end of the bargain - tell me of your village? Is it a place worthy of my time?"

"Sadly it is not," replied the shepherd. "Here you will find that the people are much the same."

And the stranger carried on, taking the fork in the path away from the valley and onward into the wastes.

On the very next day, on that same hill, a second man came along and joined the shepherd where he sat. He spread his lunch between himself and the shepherd, and bid him share his dates and wine. After some time the conversation turned to the purpose of the stranger's journey. "I am looking for a home, good shepherd. The town that I am from was a lovely, friendly place, full of honest and hardworking folk, but I felt that surely there must be something new to see in this world. And so I have set out to find new friends and family among strangers. Tell me of your village, shepherd - is it a place that would welcome me?"

"Indeed it is," replied the shepherd. "You will find that people here are much the same as those you left behind. Come, let us walk together, and when we arrive I shall introduce you as my friend."