The Miracle of Bigfoot Birth

January 29, 2011 12:23 PM

Sasquatch Birth Journal 2, "an unprecedented peek at the mysteries of nature." Perhaps NSFW.
posted by theperfectcrime (20 comments total)

You know, when I think of the top ten places I'd like to have a baby, "precariously dangling out of a tree with stabby underbrush below" ranks pretty high. Good work.

Also, I'm pretty sure, after watching this video, that sasquatch mamas are where baby ewoks come from.
posted by phunniemee at 12:29 PM on January 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

Looks like the bar at Sundance has fallen off the uprights.
posted by HuronBob at 12:33 PM on January 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

I was hoping that the sasquatch would eat the placenta at the end.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 12:34 PM on January 29, 2011 [5 favorites]

I don't see how this is going to sell Jack Link's Beef Jerky.
posted by nathancaswell at 12:41 PM on January 29, 2011 [3 favorites]

Pretty uninspired cinematography for such an event. I would have thought the makers would get better funding after the box office that Sasquatch Birth Journal pulled in.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 12:58 PM on January 29, 2011

Well that's 4 minutes of my life I'll never get back.
posted by Long Way To Go at 1:38 PM on January 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

Sasquatch Crotch Watch
posted by Burhanistan at 2:07 PM on January 29, 2011 [2 favorites]

Look at that little hairy miracle!!
posted by fancyoats at 2:11 PM on January 29, 2011

Why?
posted by longsleeves at 2:49 PM on January 29, 2011

Clearly some of that money they plowed into the auto industry and the mortgage crisis should have gone into the alien autopsy market instead.
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 3:02 PM on January 29, 2011

Um.
posted by Liquidwolf at 3:49 PM on January 29, 2011

A natural sasquatch birth is rather rare to see, considering most go with a Cesarean.
posted by orme at 4:06 PM on January 29, 2011 [2 favorites]

Um. What.
posted by spacewrench at 6:52 PM on January 29, 2011

I was hoping that the sasquatch would eat the placenta at the end.

The Loch Ness Monster did. It was scrumptious.
posted by New Frontier at 7:00 PM on January 29, 2011

yeah, but where's the birth certificate?
posted by liza at 7:24 PM on January 29, 2011 [2 favorites]

I'm about 75% sure that's a man in a costume. A man.
posted by From Bklyn at 10:54 PM on January 29, 2011 [2 favorites]

Didn't Matthew Barney do this first, only there was a big old truck and...

oh, no, that wasn't it.
posted by fairytale of los angeles at 12:23 AM on January 30, 2011

I am pretty sure a lady sasquatch would find a cave or hollow tree to give boirth, at very least an old bear den. She would make piles of dried grass, or moss to lie don in as she gave birth. The only way this tree situation would happen is if this were a sasquatch late term abortion.
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 12:26 AM on January 30, 2011

This goes someway to answering the age old question: how is sasquatch babby formed?
posted by ob at 3:12 PM on January 30, 2011

I guess this explains why they're darn near extinct; dropping a baby onto the ground from 6 feet up seems like a good way to make an omelette. A delicious baby sasquatch omelette.
posted by jenkinsEar at 3:35 PM on January 30, 2011