Newt Gingrich in Front of Stock Photos

March 4, 2011 2:45 PM

Yesterday, Newt Gingrich announced that he's going to "explore the possibility" of running for president in 2012 with an exploratory site that uses an awkward stock photo. Then Web incompetence led to an inevitable consequence. (previously)
posted by mrgrimm (86 comments total)

From the "Web incompetence" link:

Gingrich launched NewtExplore2012.com yesterday, and ExploreNewt2012.com -- a slightly more intuitive name -- now redirects to former La. Gov. Buddy Roemer's (R) website, BuddyRoemer.com. "We had nothing to do with that. Please, I assure you," Roemer said in an interview today. He added that his and Gingrich's team spoke about the website issue this morning. Gingrich's team, Roemer said, believes that the domain name was purchased by someone in Arizona.

Gingrich's team is unconcerned about the redirect. "Yes, and Roemer spelled backward is the first-person singular present passive indicative of the Latin remeō," Gingrich spokesperson Rick Tyler said. "But I don't think that is going help him either."

Good to see a fellow classics major getting work.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 2:50 PM on March 4, 2011 [12 favorites]

LOLNewtz.
posted by logicpunk at 2:51 PM on March 4, 2011

Click here if you're a billionaire who would like to shift the discourse!
posted by a robot made out of meat at 2:52 PM on March 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

Explore the possibility? Why are republicans not openly stating their campaigns?
posted by Orange Pamplemousse at 2:54 PM on March 4, 2011

As of the posting of this article Gingrich.com, Newtgingrich.com, Newtgingrichforpresident.com, Newtforpresident.com and Gingrichforpresident.com are all available.

That's weird but thanks for the heads up National Journal.
posted by 2bucksplus at 2:54 PM on March 4, 2011

The USA is sorely lacking in wealthy old white man representation. It's good that Newt is there for that neglected demographic. We should pitch in and buy him hamburgers.
posted by five fresh fish at 2:55 PM on March 4, 2011 [9 favorites]

I got better.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:59 PM on March 4, 2011 [11 favorites]

The USA is sorely lacking in wealthy old white man representation.

Bruce Sterling's Distraction is a wonderful exploration of the notion that America might not always be thus. White people are moving back to europe in it, and the Air Force holds a bake sale to buy a bomber (sort of)

Is the Right in this country more insane these days, or am I just noticing it more?
posted by poe at 3:04 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

I like the photo. His third wife is the prettiest one so far.
posted by Mayor Curley at 3:07 PM on March 4, 2011 [30 favorites]

Nobody wants to run because there seem to be very, very few viable electoral paths to viability for a GOP candidate in 2012. Even if Obama sheds FL, VA, NC, CO, NV from his 2008 haul, GOP still needs to come up with 14 EVs for a win, which would likely have to come from Indiana (11) + some other Midwestern state or possibly New Mexico (5).
posted by ofthestrait at 3:09 PM on March 4, 2011 [3 favorites]

I got better.

Congratulations. But, somehow, I don't think Newt ever will.
posted by Rinku at 3:09 PM on March 4, 2011

Also troubling for Gingrich: in the process of typing "Newt Gingrich explore" into Google, suggestions like "Newt Gingrich extramarital affair," "Newt Gingrich ex-wife," and "Newt Gingrich ex-wife cancer" pop up.
posted by absalom at 3:09 PM on March 4, 2011 [19 favorites]

Hair and more hair.
posted by docpops at 3:10 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

viable electoral paths to viability

Doh!
posted by ofthestrait at 3:11 PM on March 4, 2011

Newt just posted an official response. It's so cash. It starts out--

Hi, my name is Newt and I hate every single one of you.
posted by mullingitover at 3:11 PM on March 4, 2011 [4 favorites]

Also troubling for Gingrich: in the process of typing "Newt Gingrich explore" into Google, suggestions like "Newt Gingrich extramarital affair," "Newt Gingrich ex-wife," and "Newt Gingrich ex-wife cancer" pop up.

Not to mention "Newt Gingrich exorcism procedure," "Newt Gingrich exploding diarrhea," and "Newt Gingrich exercise video"
posted by FelliniBlank at 3:12 PM on March 4, 2011 [9 favorites]

President Newt.

hahahahahahahahahaha
posted by blue_beetle at 3:13 PM on March 4, 2011 [4 favorites]

We are totally experiencing the farce version of 1995.
posted by grapesaresour at 3:17 PM on March 4, 2011 [13 favorites]

I have heard that Newt has a long history of exploring new possibilities.
posted by R. Mutt at 3:20 PM on March 4, 2011 [12 favorites]

Metafilter: Sorely lacking in wealthy old white man representation.
posted by Mister Fabulous at 3:25 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

1) Wait for the Republican Party to split at the convention.

2) "Reluctantly" accept the nomination "for the good of the party and nation."

3) INTERNS!
posted by R. Mutt at 3:28 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

He's getting played by both sides. newexplore2012.com goes to a Sarah Palin fansite.
posted by Uncle Ira at 3:29 PM on March 4, 2011

Wasn't Newt supposed to be some kind of technophile futurist or some such bullshit?
posted by box at 3:31 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

If I was going to donate to an explorer, I'd go back in time and give to Shackleton.
posted by davebush at 3:34 PM on March 4, 2011 [10 favorites]

Newt Gingrich? The same Newt Gingrich who, as speaker of the House, led the impeachment of President Clinton for lying about a extramarital affair while Gingrich himself was simultaneously having sex with his future third wife behind his second wife's back, the second wife being the woman he was cheating with while still married to his first wife, whom he served with divorce papers while she was in the hospital fighting cancer so he could leave her for his second wife? He wants to run for president as the candidate of the "family values" party? Well, I guess that's about what we should expect of what the Republican party has become. If Gingrich (or any other Republican) is elected (god I hope not) the oddsmakers in the UK will be taking bets regarding the fourth wife and what countries are likely to be invaded next.
posted by Daddy-O at 3:42 PM on March 4, 2011 [53 favorites]

President Newt.

Don't forget the Third Lady. Marriage is pretty important to Republicans.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 3:48 PM on March 4, 2011 [12 favorites]

Republicans only care about other people''s adultery.
posted by PinkMoose at 3:51 PM on March 4, 2011 [7 favorites]

His wife looks like she has just hidden her fangs.
posted by doctor_negative at 3:57 PM on March 4, 2011 [4 favorites]

I do think the Newt Gingrich in front of the various stock photos was pretty funny.

If Newt is successful in this plan, however, I think that rather than having the joke stock photo with Newt in front of happy people with American flags that it should perhaps be changed to happy people with Canadian flags… Because if Newt is successful in this crazy endeavor, many segments of the population will only be happy if they can quickly leave the states and establish citizenship somewhere else. Please, Canada, let us in.
posted by Wolfster at 4:02 PM on March 4, 2011

Explore the possibility? Why are republicans not openly stating their campaigns?

NPR says it's "Because he's just exploring whether to run, under federal election law he can raise and spend money and never has to disclose details unless he actually decides to run at some point."
posted by Roger Dodger at 4:05 PM on March 4, 2011

Rachel Maddow breaks it down for you.
posted by gingerbeer at 4:06 PM on March 4, 2011 [20 favorites]

A propos of nothing, I was thinking today that 'Nude Gingrich' would be a pretty good band name.
posted by bicyclefish at 4:06 PM on March 4, 2011 [4 favorites]

Ah, and here's the story about it from the ride home.

Enjoy public radio while you can, folks!
posted by Roger Dodger at 4:07 PM on March 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

Newt Explore 2012 also sounds like an early Atari game.
posted by Wolfdog at 4:16 PM on March 4, 2011 [8 favorites]

Explore Newt? Err no thanks. Proctology has never been that high on my wish-list.
posted by ob at 4:20 PM on March 4, 2011

fuck him
posted by growabrain at 4:25 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Explore the possibility? Why are republicans not openly stating their campaigns?

Candidates of both parties do that sort of thing. Look back at the last presidential election and you'll see plenty of talk about 'exploring' in the first half of 2007. Mind you, considering Newt's public persona it seems pretty silly. He gives off the same sort of chronic insecurity that characterized Guiliani in the last race. My money's on Mitt Romney getting the nomination, but only if the GOP can marginalize its batshitinsane brigade.
posted by anigbrowl at 4:26 PM on March 4, 2011

I get the feeling a lot of the Republican family values ire will be dormant if Newt gets past the primaries, since the GOP base really wants to get Obama out of the White House. And I think in this economy, people care more about job creation and fixing the deficit (which actually isn't always the best thing to work on in a recession, but I get their fears) than the character of the candidates.

Of course, I also get the feeling that the most energized parts of the GOP, the Tea Party (yes, they're a branch of the GOP, let's not kid ourselves) and the hard right in general don't really like Newt as much as the alternatives. I mean, he's kind of been an establishment Republican and relatively moderate compared to the latest batch of Republican congresspeople. And the anti-green Republicans hate that he was in ads raising awareness of climate change.

I think Huckabee stands a slightly better chance for the nom, because he's been more consistently conservative (remember, registered Republicans are able vote in their primaries, not all voters in most states), although he has said some weird things on his talk show that'll come back to haunt him (Implying the president grew up in Kenya).

Palin has a large appeal, although I think most conservatives understand that although they'd really like her in the White House, there's no way most Americans would vote for her. She's more polarizing than your average politician.

Romney seems to have kind of fallen from grace, because he effectively created a healthcare system like the Affordable Healthcare Act, back when people rightly recognised that style of healthcare plan as rather conservative. Now that the goalposts have moved among conservatives so that anything that doesn't actually deregulate healthcare is socialism and/or unconstitutional, I don't think he stands much of a chance, especially since every republican will be running on the "REPEAL NOBAMACARE" platform unless people's opinion of the plan changes. As benefits trickle out, and people forget about it or think it's already gone, it's likely it'll lose its cache. Were it not for the Republicans themselves falling out of love with him, he'd probably have had a good shot.

Speaking of which, for the republicans to win the presidency in the next election, I think they'll need to find a good wedge issue. Gay marriage is no longer a good idea, as it's not 2004. Young Americans generally favor gay marriage and have gay friends more than previous generations, so they'll get out the vote if this is brought up, and social conservatives are kind of a expected to vote, because they're generally older, and they generally want to fight Obama's re-election. I'm kind of worried Islamophobia might be the one to work. Gingrich is pretty good at bringing up wedge issues in ways that sound like he's not trying to stir up controversy but just be the voice of reason, so he might actually be their best shot at the White House.
posted by mccarty.tim at 4:33 PM on March 4, 2011 [3 favorites]

Nobody wants to run because there seem to be very, very few viable electoral paths to viability for a GOP candidate in 2012.

If anyone has an article or two about this to share, I'd be much obliged.
posted by reductiondesign at 4:44 PM on March 4, 2011

Is this like when Dan Quayle ran for president in 2000?

Yeah, that happened.
posted by Put the kettle on at 4:56 PM on March 4, 2011 [3 favorites]

Newt can explore the possibility of kissing my my beer bloated ass, you slimy fuck.
posted by jonmc at 5:02 PM on March 4, 2011 [7 favorites]

Rachel Maddow breaks it down for you.

That was awesome.

But I'm failing to see a problem. Vain fools are parted from their money through an appeal to vanity, Newt burns through it like tumbleweeds so he can play-act at being a political figure but stays out of actually running for office or having any influence over much of anything at all except for a few towncar and plane chartering companies and a vanity press. I couldn't invent a bigger monkey wrench if I tried.

Yes, please. Please run for president, Newt. I double-dog dare you. Some young Turk is going to eat your breakfast off of your best clock.
posted by loquacious at 5:11 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Even putting politics aside, Newt is one of the worst possible choices. He has an ugly past that everybody knows about, he comes across as a smug prick and his image is basically Conservative Clinton Lite.
posted by jonmc at 5:16 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Nobody is declaring yet for 2012 because they are all Fox News correspondents using the network a promotion venue. That gravy train ends when they declare their candidacy because of election rules.
posted by mek at 5:20 PM on March 4, 2011 [6 favorites]

So, basically, nobody will declare until after Romney does.
posted by mek at 5:21 PM on March 4, 2011

Calista Gingrich needs to stop dying her hair blond.
posted by jnnla at 5:24 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Speaking of Romney, Gingrich has the same problem as him: we don't want a President "Newt," anymore than we want a President "Mitt."
posted by jonmc at 5:24 PM on March 4, 2011

That Tumblr with all the alternate stock photos was surprisingly amusing. And some of them actually made for pretty incisive political commentary.
posted by LMGM at 5:28 PM on March 4, 2011

I think that in 2012 Newt should explore... DEEZ NUTZ!
posted by GuyZero at 5:34 PM on March 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

Charlie Sheen '11 you heard it here first.
posted by Ad hominem at 5:37 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

That's right '11 #winning
posted by Ad hominem at 5:39 PM on March 4, 2011 [6 favorites]

We'll just run Tom Berenger against him.
posted by jonmc at 5:44 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Newt really is a joke candidate. Too smart by modern Republican standards, and not telegenic either.
posted by sotonohito at 5:48 PM on March 4, 2011

If he's so all-hell smart why is his campaign crashing and burning before it's even begun?
posted by blucevalo at 5:57 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

R. Mutt: "1) Wait for the Republican Party to split at the convention.

2) "Reluctantly" accept the nomination "for the good of the party and nation."
"

I know it will never REALLY happen, but this looks like our best shot at a brokered convention in a while. Smoke-filled rooms! Hundreds of ballots! Favorite son strategy! Dark horses!
posted by Chrysostom at 6:08 PM on March 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

Be nice, sotnohito. Santorum says he might also run. He's a NSFW joke, albeit a pretty terrible candidate with views much too socially conservative for the national stage.
posted by mccarty.tim at 6:14 PM on March 4, 2011

Nobody is declaring yet for 2012 because they are all Fox News correspondents using the network a promotion venue. That gravy train ends when they declare their candidacy because of election rules.

Plus they're waiting til Sept 11, and it's going to be sickening.
posted by cashman at 6:26 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Ugh, that's probably true. Remember how the RNC for 2004 was held in New York City, near entirely to appeal to post-9/11 fears? Here's some relevant vintage Colbert.
posted by mccarty.tim at 6:32 PM on March 4, 2011

Newt, you cynical gasbag twat. Pain will come unto you from people who are aware that you espouse beliefs that run counter to the very people who support you. Fundamentalists will crucify you on morailty grounds. Have fun sailing between Scylla and Charybdis with Sean Hannity, douche.
posted by nj_subgenius at 6:40 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

The one thing I really remember from that in-depth interview with one of his exes in Esquire a while back is that the only kind of "criticism" that really bothers him is when people call him/make fun of him for being fat (which is a rather fascinating view into his psyche bc true or false, people say some pretty nasty things about him that, I guess, give him no pause).
I do not advocate the fat joke or the fat mocking. But is this the exception that proves the rule? Maybe.
posted by atomicstone at 6:43 PM on March 4, 2011

Palin has a large appeal, although I think most conservatives understand that although they'd really like her in the White House, there's no way most Americans would vote for her. She's more polarizing than your average politician.

This is my dream. Oh please, please run Palin. She has absolutely zero chance, and it would be so funny to see her eaten alive. She is more polarizing than Hillary Clinton, which I wouldn't have thought possible. Yet, she seems feasible, if you are a moron or a die-hard.

The best part is, I truly think there is a good chance she could nab the nomination. Please. Please. PLEASE.
posted by Invoke at 7:00 PM on March 4, 2011

If Newt is successful in this plan, however, I think that rather than having the joke stock photo with Newt in front of happy people with American flags that it should perhaps be changed to happy people with Canadian flags… Because if Newt is successful in this crazy endeavor, many segments of the population will only be happy if they can quickly leave the states and establish citizenship somewhere else. Please, Canada, let us in.
posted by Wolfster at 4:02 PM on March 4

Umm. You have seen this thread, haven't you? Somehow "out of the frying pan into the fire" seems apropos somehow.
posted by sardonyx at 7:06 PM on March 4, 2011

Palin has a large appeal, although I think most conservatives understand that although they'd really like her in the White House, there's no way most Americans would vote for her.

Morbid Curiosity Leading Many Voters To Support Palin

A recent poll shows 62% of Americans say they don't want to vote for Palin, but kinda just have to see what would happen.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 7:11 PM on March 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

Don't wish for it too hard, Invoke. This is one of those careful what you wish for situations. If she runs but doesn't get the nom, but mobilizes people, and then all the Republicans and Republican-ish people direct their people (again, Palin is not followed because she is smart and reasoned, she is followed like she is a war general and those people would likely vote for whomever she said to vote for) to get behind someone, that someone could win. I think if the Republican debates are pretty softbally (because they don't want to damage each other) that's a big clue. But I'm just guessing here. It just always seems like haha, what a joke! Until all of a sudden things look grim. And I feel like if the republicans get back in office they are going to party like it's 1899, riding the wave of .... shit I hope I am wrong.
posted by cashman at 7:12 PM on March 4, 2011

For the age of the white, fat, old, and republican candidate:

.
posted by buzzman at 7:12 PM on March 4, 2011

I sent Newt and Callista a message asking if he's not cheating on Callista right now, when was he planning on starting?

And I got an email back:

Thank you for sending us your question. We appreciate hearing from you while we are exploring a possible presidential campaign. Your questions are very helpful in understanding what is most important to Americans.

Please visit us again at NewtExplore2012.com to stay up to date, participate in the discussions on our Facebook page and follow us on Twitter @NewtExplore2012.

Your friend,

Newt Gingrich

He's my friend!
posted by mikelieman at 7:17 PM on March 4, 2011 [5 favorites]

Dig the royal "we."
posted by FelliniBlank at 7:20 PM on March 4, 2011

The best part about a Palin nomination would be the debates. Instead of just one awkward VP debate where she can't pronounce her opponent's name right ("O'Biden"), we get about three debates between Palin and Obama, generally considered an excellent orator and debater outside of circles who go "Hurf durf, telepromter, amirite?"

The problem is that when Sarah Palin is on the spot and hasn't memorized an answer, she tends to restate the question and evade answering. I get the feeling this is because having clear stances on policy is a weakness of hers.
posted by mccarty.tim at 7:23 PM on March 4, 2011

I get the feeling this is because having clear stances on policy is a weakness of hers.

Do you think that the election in 2012 will be centered around rational consideration of policy stances?
posted by cashman at 7:44 PM on March 4, 2011

I get the feeling this is because having clear stances on policy thinking about stuff is a weakness of hers.
posted by Rock Steady at 7:52 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Could someone with more skills than mine (which are non-existent) please Photoshop that picture with a bucket of cocks? Because that's pretty much what I think of Newt and his presidential aspirations - it's worth a bucket of cocks. At least Palin brings the OMGWTF factor - Newt is more "who the hell is that old guy" to anyone under 30 (which is not me - I remember his hypocritical ass from the last time around). And the Stepford wife reminds me of no one more than Cindy McCain.
posted by Lulu's Pink Converse at 9:14 PM on March 4, 2011

My money's on Mitt Romney getting the nomination, but only if the GOP can marginalize its batshitinsane brigade.

Not a chance in hell. The GOP is the batshitinsane brigade. There is no way a Mormon gets the Republican nomination for president. It's not going to happen. I'll eat my internet hat.
posted by EarBucket at 9:15 PM on March 4, 2011 [1 favorite]

Internewt Explorer.
posted by kirkaracha at 9:21 PM on March 4, 2011 [3 favorites]

Newt helped popularized the phrase "family values" and probably said it more often than anyone else in sound bites, but he is most famous for his messy divorces. Newt was a congressman from the most federally funded district in America at the time (thanks to large jet fighter contracts), yet he took every opportunity to insist that government spending was out of control and personally fought for his pet proposal to cap food stamps at five years for recipients, and to cut federally funded school lunches. He championed these causes by claiming that only in America are the poor also too fat, an idea that seemed to embarrass him.
posted by Brian B. at 9:42 PM on March 4, 2011 [2 favorites]

President Grinch, Ginch, or Gonch
posted by KokuRyu at 9:47 PM on March 4, 2011

Not a chance in hell. The GOP is the batshitinsane brigade. There is no way a Mormon gets the Republican nomination for president. It's not going to happen. I'll eat my internet hat.

I hear Newt's a Catholic these days...
posted by mikelieman at 11:19 PM on March 4, 2011

Geez, maybe I should have actually quoted some actual context there ( But the words GOP...batshitinsane brigade sorta blinds me -- in a good way... )

I was replying to the comment about Mitt Romney ( who is a Mormon ) with a comment meant to highlight what some might consider yet another potential liability of the man I'm starting to like calling "The Newter"
posted by mikelieman at 11:22 PM on March 4, 2011

The election of 2004 was centered around hate for gay people. And it worked. George W. Bush won, and if you look at the statistics, he won specifically because of gay hate. Most people who cared more about Iraq voted for Kerry.

In 2012, the election will center on hate of Muslims. This factors greatly in our "secret Muslim" president with the middle name Hussein. Islamophobia is on the rise, and frankly flourishing in America. Whereas candidate McCain was squeamish to exploit Islamophibia to become president, future President Huckabee clearly has no problem stoking the fires of Muslim hate.
posted by dirigibleman at 11:59 PM on March 4, 2011 [3 favorites]

I just want to point out the excellence of Newt Gingrich in front of Woman Laughing Alone With Salad.
posted by taz at 1:28 AM on March 5, 2011 [1 favorite]

I wanted to do a site featuring a republish of all news links about Mike Huckabee so it would be high up in the rankings on google. It was going to be called www.pardonmehuckabee.com, but someone bought and parked the domain.
posted by Ironmouth at 4:02 AM on March 5, 2011 [1 favorite]

Haley! '12. Bolton as VP candidate until he eats a small child.
posted by Ironmouth at 9:59 PM on March 5, 2011

Nobody is declaring yet for 2012 because they are all Fox News correspondents using the network a promotion venue.

That's a shitload of time on camera. The oppo research will be tremendous. Not the advantage they think it will be. A disadvantage. Not exactly presidential either.
posted by Ironmouth at 10:04 PM on March 5, 2011 [1 favorite]

Nobody wants to run because there seem to be very, very few viable electoral paths to viability for a GOP candidate in 2012.

If anyone has an article or two about this to share, I'd be much obliged.

Are you looking for something specific?

From Mike Huckabee to Sarah Palin, the Republicans Offer Indecision 2012 - 2/23/11 - Politics Daily

Revved-Up GOP Ponders 2012 - 11/14/10 - Wall St. Journal

For Iowa GOP, 'the one' for 2012 is 'no one' yet - 3/1/11 - McClatchy

Weekly Standard: Who Will Unite The Right In 2012 - 3/2/11 - NPR

Betting odds on Obama look like a -125/-130 moneyline, or 55% in his favor, which seems low to me, but maybe I'm calculating that wrong.
posted by mrgrimm at 10:20 AM on March 7, 2011 [1 favorite]

God, Newt is such a cockroach. He keeps crawling out from under his slimy rock with another despicable "plan for America" just when you think he might finally be dead. I'm embarrassed that he was a representative of my home state when all that bullshit with Clinton went down. Pun not intended.
posted by ashirys at 10:46 AM on March 7, 2011

I was just listening to the weekend's podcast of Wait Wait Don't Tell Me. They were talking about Gingrich and Santorum (the guy, not the bodily discharge) being put on leave from Fox News because of "ethical concerns." There was an immediate, spontaneous uproar of laughter that went on for nearly 30 seconds. A great, unplanned radio moment.
posted by Danf at 11:25 AM on March 7, 2011

Embrace, Explain, or Evade: How Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, and Mike Huckabee are handling the issues that could sink their campaigns.
posted by homunculus at 2:16 PM on March 8, 2011