The real tragedy is that Ryan never got the voice mail.

April 1, 2011 12:04 AM

Love at First Sight, Quite possibly the worst case of drunk dialing ever to reach the internet. Ryan Responds spoof.
posted by Felex (34 comments total)

them's some fancy video text thingies.
posted by anarch at 12:10 AM on April 1, 2011

"Check out more great stories at http://brostories.com". They are indeed bro stories.
posted by benzenedream at 12:17 AM on April 1, 2011

SANKS!
posted by clavdivs at 12:23 AM on April 1, 2011

This could lead to a babby being formed.
posted by Neale at 12:26 AM on April 1, 2011 [1 favorite]

This is so the future of text messaging, in more ways than one LOL!

.__         .__   
|  |   ____ |  |  
|  |  /  _ \|  |  
|  |_(  <> )  |__
|____/\____/|____/
                  

  _       U  ___ u   _      
  |"|       \/"_ \/  |"|     
U | | u     | | | |U | | u   
 \| |/__.-,_| |_| | \| |/__  
  |_____|\_)-\___/   |_____| 
  //  \\      \\     //  \\  
 (_")("_)    (__)   (_")("_) 

posted by twoleftfeet at 12:33 AM on April 1, 2011 [8 favorites]

J as in juice.

I as in I... can't believe she used the word she's trying to spell.
posted by XhaustedProphet at 12:33 AM on April 1, 2011 [2 favorites]

Hi Nicki, it's Mike.
posted by XhaustedProphet at 12:35 AM on April 1, 2011 [1 favorite]

Dmitri the stud
posted by skauskas at 12:50 AM on April 1, 2011

Whoa. I'm newly single and the people around me seem intent on making that seem as terrifying as possible. Thanks, Metafilter, for contributing.
posted by elwoodwiles at 1:10 AM on April 1, 2011

So... does she work at eBay or Jamba Juice? Or both? Inquiring minds...
posted by disillusioned at 1:30 AM on April 1, 2011 [1 favorite]

He didn't even go out that night!!!!!!
posted by Summer at 1:35 AM on April 1, 2011 [2 favorites]

Ryan obviously has the spare time to create this, not going out on Friday night probably helps. She sounds like more fun than him!
posted by asok at 1:50 AM on April 1, 2011 [7 favorites]

"Check out more great stories at http://brostories.com". They are indeed bro stories.

Loved the picture submitted by brosef198
posted by PeterMcDermott at 2:38 AM on April 1, 2011

The drunk chick version of the NATO phonetic alphabet had me rolling. "U as in Eunice". EUNICE.
posted by DecemberBoy at 4:10 AM on April 1, 2011 [1 favorite]

This gave me a big laugh, but the response-spoof, not so much. That is definitely not how I pictured Ryan. Where was his cu-cute shirt and his li'l pants??
posted by thinkpiece at 4:13 AM on April 1, 2011

oh those li'l pants
posted by molecicco at 4:42 AM on April 1, 2011 [4 favorites]

This seems so...context-free....
posted by nj_subgenius at 4:48 AM on April 1, 2011 [1 favorite]

If all the world and love were young,
And truth in every shepherd's tongue,
These pretty pleasures might me move
To live with thee and be thy love.

Thy belt of straw and ivy buds,
Thy coral clasps and amber studs,
All these in me no means can move
To come to thee and be thy love.

But could youth last and love still breed,
Had joys no date nor age no need,
Then these delights my mind may move
To live with thee and be thy love.
posted by jenkinsEar at 5:01 AM on April 1, 2011

Wait, does she work at Ebay or Jamba Juice? At first she seemed like a nice girl, but now I'm starting to think this girl is maybe a little crazy. EBay is a full time job, how could she have time for Jamba Juice? EBAY!
posted by mcstayinskool at 5:08 AM on April 1, 2011

I would be delighted to discover this is real, but I feel suspicious about the fact that she didn't leave her phone number, which seems like it would be stage one in getting Ryan to call her back.
posted by Greg Nog at 5:12 AM on April 1, 2011 [4 favorites]

Maybe she works at the Jamba Juice *inside* Ebay?
posted by chara at 5:13 AM on April 1, 2011

I would be delighted to discover this is real, but I feel suspicious about the fact that she didn't leave her phone number, which seems like it would be stage one in getting Ryan to call her back.

Uh, hello noob, she's playing hard to get obv, haven't you read The Rules?
posted by Potomac Avenue at 5:33 AM on April 1, 2011

I thought they exchanged digits at the club earlier. Plus, don't numbers come up for everyone in the call list? I dunno, sounded pretty authentic to me -- hard to sustain that consistent level of slurry drunk talk as a gag.
posted by thinkpiece at 6:01 AM on April 1, 2011

I would be delighted to discover this is real, but I feel suspicious about the fact that she didn't leave her phone number, which seems like it would be stage one in getting Ryan to call her back.

It'll be on his phone.
posted by empath at 6:31 AM on April 1, 2011

> hard to sustain that consistent level of slurry drunk talk as a gag.

Method actors: need to play a drunk? Be a drunk.
posted by jfuller at 6:47 AM on April 1, 2011 [2 favorites]

Clearly she works at Jamba Juice but operates an Ebay shop on the side for tiny pants, yo-yos and items personalized with the name Unice.
posted by Kitty Stardust at 7:53 AM on April 1, 2011 [3 favorites]

I think she must work at the combination Ebay and Jamba Juice. Maybe the one on Jamaica Avenue.
posted by Zippity Goombah at 8:17 AM on April 1, 2011 [4 favorites]

I feel suspicious about the fact that she didn't leave her phone number, which seems like it would be stage one in getting Ryan to call her back.

Maybe you should listen to it again. SHE GAVE HIM HER BUSINESS CARD! HE HAS ALL HER DETAILS! Did you hear the part about the little pants?
posted by dobbs at 9:14 AM on April 1, 2011

I would be delighted to discover this is real, but I feel suspicious about the fact that she didn't leave her phone number, which seems like it would be stage one in getting Ryan to call her back.

Remember that Ryan has her eBay/Jamba Juice business card with ALL of her contact information, including her fax number. :-)
posted by fignewton at 9:17 AM on April 1, 2011

She can't think of any words that start with J. I doubt she'd be able to realize her phone # is in his history. Plus she blurts out right at the end that she's single. She would indeed have mentioned her number, probably more than once.
posted by DU at 9:34 AM on April 1, 2011

Maybe she sells juice on ebay.
posted by ook at 9:51 AM on April 1, 2011

I as in Eye
You KNOW
posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:17 AM on April 1, 2011

I as in Eye

And "she" as in...dunno, am I the only one who doesn't know a lot of ladies named Dominic?
posted by evidenceofabsence at 12:06 PM on April 1, 2011

Dimitri sounds like a hot catch. I wonder, is he still single?
posted by five fresh fish at 5:15 PM on April 1, 2011