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"If only you knew the power of the Dark Side."
April 12, 2011 11:16 AM   Subscribe

"...perhaps she will." [SLYT] Sariah Gallego Joins the Dark Side.
posted by Fizz (49 comments total) 29 users marked this as a favorite

 
That's hilarious!
posted by caution live frogs at 11:19 AM on April 12, 2011


Alternate ending to Empire Strikes Back.
posted by Fizz at 11:19 AM on April 12, 2011


I guess they DID has cookies
posted by Redhush at 11:20 AM on April 12, 2011


Its the bow that really does it,

That girl is welcome on my lawn.
posted by Blasdelb at 11:22 AM on April 12, 2011 [8 favorites]


The Jedi Training Pavilion is my favorite place to have lunch in the entire world, because kids + Star Wars = Win.
posted by carsonb at 11:22 AM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]


Its the bow that really does it,

Mostly this.
posted by Fizz at 11:22 AM on April 12, 2011


Zod: "Kneel before Zod!"
Sariah Gallego: "Bite my shiny metal ass, Zod."
posted by steef at 11:23 AM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]


I think for some people the question of joining the dark side, isn't really a question at all. If put in Luke's shoes, I know I'd say yes in a heartbeat!
posted by Fizz at 11:25 AM on April 12, 2011


I was really sad for her that they didn't let her completely submit but just walked her away. When does she get her powers??
posted by DU at 11:26 AM on April 12, 2011


I'm really surprised that they don't have a scripted reaction to a kid joining the Dark Side.
Why would you give a little kid a choice between two things and expect only one result? You should be prepared for at least 3 answers ;)
posted by jozxyqk at 11:30 AM on April 12, 2011 [24 favorites]


My son would send me to the spice mines of Kessel just for a small taste of the Dark Side of the Force.
posted by bondcliff at 11:33 AM on April 12, 2011 [5 favorites]


So awesome that in ten years, any job-interview googlings for her will immediately reveal the most BADASS YOUTHFUL INDISCRETION EVER.
posted by Greg Nog at 11:34 AM on April 12, 2011 [20 favorites]


Her first semester at Sith U:

- Fundamentals of Force Choking
- Applied Lightning
- Liking Turtles
posted by cortex at 11:34 AM on April 12, 2011 [10 favorites]


Eh, probably just a Sith Until Graduation.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:39 AM on April 12, 2011 [22 favorites]


I love Mace Windu's reactions - "Oh, the kid's confused, that's fine, I can - wait, what? She's not confused? She's... bowing. She's intentionally submitting to the Dark Lord of the Sith. Um. How the hell did we not script for this?"

I won't lie, watching this kind of made me want to reproduce.
posted by Tomorrowful at 11:43 AM on April 12, 2011 [16 favorites]


I agree, Tomorrowful. It made my ovaries ache.
(My wife will be most surprised)
posted by DigDoug at 11:48 AM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]


Also, I bet they have a scripted response tomorrow. This thing has come across my internet circles from 3-4 different directions now.
posted by DigDoug at 11:50 AM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]


Also, I bet they have a scripted response tomorrow. This thing has come across my internet circles from 3-4 different directions now.

I don't know if it was already scripted, but walking her off to Sith School seemed the way to elide it.

Mr. & Mrs. Gallego, you've got a handful there.
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 11:52 AM on April 12, 2011


Haha! I'm so sliding in a little court manners training for the little to-be when I get a chance. One should be as graceful when accepting the dark side.
posted by LD Feral at 11:54 AM on April 12, 2011


Watching this at Disneyland a few months back I wondered what would happen if a kid joined the dark side. Now I know. It's awesome.
posted by eyeballkid at 11:57 AM on April 12, 2011


I see Columbia business school and then a successful career at Goldman Sachs in her future
posted by photoslob at 12:06 PM on April 12, 2011 [8 favorites]


I like the stormtrooper that gives a little victory pump to the girl after she kneels.
posted by Manjusri at 12:12 PM on April 12, 2011 [5 favorites]


As a representative of Goldman Sachs, I would like to inform you that force-choking is not, and has never been, representative of Goldman Sachs' policies. Goldman Sachs is committed to an atmosphere of diversity and acceptance, and fosters tolerance and understanding as a means of resolving disputes. The unfortunate force-choking incidents of the past few months have been dealt with summarily, and have taught us valuable lessons to take into account moving forward.

Thank you.
posted by MrVisible at 12:15 PM on April 12, 2011 [15 favorites]


I liked Vader's response. He certainly expressed confidence in a plan well-executed.
posted by CancerMan at 12:18 PM on April 12, 2011


I liked Vader's response. He certainly expressed confidence in a plan well-executed.

It's all recorded real-Vader lines from the movies, right? I sort of imagined the guy in the sound booth staring in horror, then going "hey, wait, I have a clip I can use!"
posted by Tomorrowful at 12:20 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]


Oh wait, on re-watch, I guess Vader's line was part of the scripted audio playing over the PA (as indicated with the lightsaber effects)? Or there was a quick tech that was able to insert that part?
posted by CancerMan at 12:22 PM on April 12, 2011


That shocked me. That actually shocked me.
posted by Jofus at 12:28 PM on April 12, 2011


Perfectly good choice, especially since I was perusing this website a couple of days ago.
posted by annsunny at 12:35 PM on April 12, 2011


All together now: I, for one...
posted by Halloween Jack at 12:40 PM on April 12, 2011


What does he say as he's walking her off? Couldn't make it out. "Let me show you where the something something??"
posted by memebake at 12:46 PM on April 12, 2011


"Let me show you where the Sith School is," of course. She'd gotten mixed up and sent to the Jedi Academy somehow.
posted by carsonb at 12:49 PM on April 12, 2011


Kids will do anything to get into a good college these days.
posted by Skygazer at 12:50 PM on April 12, 2011


I like the Dark Side. They have cookies.
posted by Samizdata at 12:56 PM on April 12, 2011


Nothing new. They've been recruiting at schools and all for some time now.
posted by mikepop at 1:06 PM on April 12, 2011


Sara, I think I've found you a boyfriend ...
posted by djrock3k at 1:06 PM on April 12, 2011


... um, Sariah...
(I don't think I'll getting your name wrong again.)
posted by djrock3k at 1:07 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]


Somewhere, in an undisclosed lair, Dick Cheney chortles with glee as he adds another name to the party rolls.
posted by briank at 1:22 PM on April 12, 2011


Sara, I think I've found you a boyfriend (yt) ...

Or girlfriend, or playmate. There's no gender cues as the child's room depicted is pink and green and full of dolls. Either way those kids would get along fine. :D
posted by Phalene at 1:27 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]


Well...when you look closely at their party line, the Jedi really are a bunch of cockbags.

Can't fall in love? Seriously? Screw that noise.
posted by scaryblackdeath at 1:27 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]


DigDoug: Also, I bet they have a scripted response tomorrow.

How much you want to bet there are parents now coaching their kids to pick the Dark Side. Or kids who saw the video. Either way, it's going to come up more often....if it hasn't already.

jozxyqk: Why would you give a little kid a choice between two things and expect only one result? You should be prepared for at least 3 answers ;)

So very true. So well put.

They have a couple choices on how to go:
  1. Fight the Jedi
  2. Vadar: "Stand next to me. Behold the Power of the Dark Side." Kid stands next to him for the next round.
posted by MrGuilt at 1:50 PM on April 12, 2011


Better than Revenge of the Sith.
posted by EarBucket at 2:00 PM on April 12, 2011


"Let me show you where the Sith School is," of course. She'd gotten mixed up and sent to the Jedi Academy somehow.

TOP: Sith School
ACCEPTABLE: Amherst
SAFETY: Jedi Academy
TAKE YEAR OFF AND RE-APPLY: Haverford
posted by Greg Nog at 2:01 PM on April 12, 2011 [7 favorites]


Oh please please please tell me someone here performs in or somehow works with that production. I have so many questions about it. I bet that job is weird.
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 2:06 PM on April 12, 2011 [5 favorites]


Another nice little detail is when Vader steps closer to her and the little girl pushes in the collapsable blade on her light saber. It's like she's signaling to him that she's no threat. So cute.
posted by cazoo at 2:37 PM on April 12, 2011


Another nice little detail is when Vader steps closer to her and the little girl pushes in the collapsable blade on her light saber. It's like she's signaling to him that she's no threat. So cute.

Yeah, you can tell that she's fantasized about this moment for a long time. So awesome.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 3:00 PM on April 12, 2011


Well...when you look closely at their party line, the Jedi really are a bunch of cockbags.

Can't fall in love? Seriously? Screw that noise.


Obligatory Shortpacked link
posted by lumpenprole at 4:44 PM on April 12, 2011


I'm not so sure she really planned the non-threatening signal. It seems more like the lightsaber extended accidentally and since she wasn't going to duel, returned it to the safe position.

I assume this because based on a related video, it looks like prior to the show all the kids were taught a small little lightsaber combo that they'll use against Darth Vader or Darth Maul, which would also coincide with the sound effects over the PA. When Mace Windu says "Activate" that's when they snap their wrist and commence with the swordplay.
posted by CancerMan at 8:26 PM on April 12, 2011


Meet the Little Sith Girl: Sariah Gallego.

Spoiler alert: She's awesome.
posted by Kattullus at 4:07 PM on April 26, 2011 [2 favorites]


HOLY SHIT THAT IS THE GREATEST POTENTIAL SITH LORD I HAVE EVER SEEN
posted by Greg Nog at 5:11 PM on April 27, 2011


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