Holy Rollers!

April 18, 2011 7:14 PM

Holy Rollers (the documentary) Card-Counting Christians.
posted by klausman (24 comments total)

At Least they can liberate the money from the cluthes of those who would use it for ill purposes.
posted by gman at 7:23 PM on April 18, 2011

I was hoping it would be some sort of Roller Derby for Jesus!
posted by Alt F4 at 7:38 PM on April 18, 2011

Do they also liberate the hookers from those who would use them for ill purposes?
posted by UseyurBrain at 8:01 PM on April 18, 2011 [1 favorite]

The word 'Christian' has been so devalued at this point that I wish people would be more specific. I'm going to bet (heh) that we're talking about card-counting baptists here.
posted by pompomtom at 8:08 PM on April 18, 2011 [2 favorites]

(that said: do they ever win clothes?)
posted by pompomtom at 8:09 PM on April 18, 2011

I was hoping it would be some sort of Christians for the legalization of marijuana (for Jesus!)
posted by Senator Howell Tankerbell at 8:13 PM on April 18, 2011

This is awesome. I want to see this movie. I looked around for more information, but it seems sparse so far. Looks like they've only recently finished the movie.

My grandparents were Church of Christ and never took a drop, swore, or told a falsehood. But they could count cards like the slickest sharp in Vegas. They played a mean Canasta and, had they been able to work around their prohibition against gambling, would have brought down a house or two.
posted by Miko at 8:24 PM on April 18, 2011

I was hoping it would be some sort of Roller Derby for Jesus!

April 24th, the DQ SPORT-O-DOME presents: ROLLIN' ON THE MOUNT. Watch the JACKSONVILLE BLOOD SACR-O-MINTS take on THE DIXIE CRUCIFIERS, Sunday at 8pm. BE THERE or be LEFT BEHIND.
posted by katillathehun at 8:32 PM on April 18, 2011 [5 favorites]

Not to be confused with ecstasy smuggling Jews.
posted by mindless progress at 8:43 PM on April 18, 2011

I looked around for more information, but it seems sparse so far.
Here's one thing - It's a kickstarter project.
posted by unliteral at 8:56 PM on April 18, 2011

I worked with a guy who did this, about 7 years ago. He had his day job, and every lunch hour he spent practicing counting cards as training. I'm sure many of the counting rings operate in the same way- my co-worker's job was to play small, normal hands and signal someone else to place the large bets at appropriate times- but I could never figure out the Gambling for Christ motive. When I confronted him with the juxtaposition, there was a convoluted rebuttal, and I could only walk away with the conclusion that they're normal people with gambling and thrill seeking impulses who have convinced themselves they're not like other gamblers and thrill seekers.
posted by l2p at 8:56 PM on April 18, 2011

What does their being Christan have to do with anything? Is it really notable in an industry that was once outright owned by a certain subset of Christians?

Or do they mean, more specifically, Evangelicals? Still, meh.

Now, if they were Seventh Day Adventists, you'd have yourself a story. Moreso if they're Anabaptists.
posted by Sys Rq at 8:57 PM on April 18, 2011 [2 favorites]

Not to be confused with ecstasy smuggling Jews.
Also, not to be confused with chaperoning devout pilgrims.
posted by unliteral at 9:01 PM on April 18, 2011

Do they also liberate the hookers from those who would use them for ill purposes?

When they snort the cocaine off their titties, they chop out the lines in the form of a crucifix -- render onto Caesar, etc.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 9:03 PM on April 18, 2011 [2 favorites]

There was an article in the Herald today about why Catholics should oppose poker machines.

I'm just racking my brain trying to come up with the right Hold Steady quote. I'd go for something from Chips Ahoy!, but I'm not sure if Sapphire is a Christian.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 9:22 PM on April 18, 2011

the right Hold Steady quote.

She was a really cool kisser gambler, and she wasn't all that strict of a Christian.
posted by clearly at 9:24 PM on April 18, 2011 [1 favorite]

Anabaptist, you say?

"Chaplain," he asked casually, "of what religious persuasion are you?"

"I'm an Anabaptist, sir."

"That's a pretty suspicious religion, isn't it?"

"Suspicious?" inquired the chaplain in a kind of innocent daze. "Why, sir?"

"Well, I don't know a thing about it. You'll have to admit that, won't you? Doesn't that make it pretty suspicious?"

"I don't know, sir," the chaplain answered diplomatically, with an uneasy manner.

"Chaplain, I once studied Latin. I think it's only fair to warn you of that before I ask my next question. Doesn't the word Anabaptist simply mean that you're not a Baptist?"

"Oh, no, sir. There's much more."

"Are you a Baptist?"

"No, sir."

"Then you are not a Baptist, aren't you?"

"Sir?"

"I don't see why you're bickering with me on that point. You've already admitted it. Now, Chaplain, to say you're not a Baptist doesn't really tell us anything about what you are, does it? You could be anything or anyone." He leaned forward slightly and his manner took on a shrewd and significant air. "You could even be," he added, "Washington Irving, couldn't you?"

posted by vidur at 9:34 PM on April 18, 2011 [7 favorites]

She was a really cool kisser gambler, and she wasn't all that strict of a Christian.

Yeah, but I don't want to wear that one out.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 9:47 PM on April 18, 2011

"Chaplain, I once studied Latin. I think it's only fair to warn you of that before I ask my next question. Doesn't the word Anabaptist simply mean that you're not a Baptist?"

Heh. I wonder if Heller actually believed that to be the meaning of the word. It isn't. The prefix ana- means a few things, none of which is "not." In the case of Anabaptists, it means "late," in reference to the fact that they are baptised in adulthood--i.e. upon confirmation of faith--rather than infancy. You may know them as the Amish and their ilk.

Anyway... Gambling!
posted by Sys Rq at 10:00 PM on April 18, 2011 [1 favorite]

On the other hand, some of my fellow Anabaptists plain a mean game of Dutch Blitz.
posted by willF at 11:10 PM on April 18, 2011

Like I keep fucking saying...
posted by telstar at 11:57 PM on April 18, 2011

At Least they can liberate the money from the cluthes of those who would use it for ill purposes.
posted by gman at 3:23 AM on April 19

Aww. They're just like regular Robin Hoods, aren't they?
posted by Decani at 5:07 AM on April 19, 2011

I wonder if Heller actually believed that to be the meaning of the word

Oh, no, he definitely didn't. If you read it in context, this conversation takes place in sort of a kangaroo interrogation of the chaplain by a bevy of incompetent officers, including neurotic colonel whose only concern is making it to the rank of general. The chaplain is one of the book's most sympathetic characters and very well drawn. Most of the humor in the discussion of his religion comes from the fact that nobody understands what the heck it is ("He's only an Anabaptist...") Also, in a critical view, Heller could be suggesting that the most humane actors in society are on the fringes and not in positions of power in the mainstream.
posted by Miko at 6:49 AM on April 19, 2011

The trailer looked fabulous, for the gambling aspect of it. The Xtian stuff seemed kind of inconsequential and merely convenience.
posted by Theta States at 9:55 AM on April 20, 2011