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A Typical Jordan Game
May 12, 2011 9:20 PM   Subscribe

Compiling the Absurd Box Scores from Space Jam. Courtesy of The Harvard College Sports Analysis Collective.
The Monstars, behind a vicious defense and a quick-strike transition offense featuring the unprecedented 3-point-line dunk, seize early control and take a 66-18 lead going into the half. Pound (Barkley) and Bupkus (Ewing) are dominant. Things look grim for Jordan, Bugs Bunny and crew.
posted by KevinSkomsvold (14 comments total) 7 users marked this as a favorite

 
In light of the Bulls returning to the conference finals, I couldn't resist. GO BULLS!
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 9:21 PM on May 12, 2011


I saw Space Jam at some point in my life. My favorite part about it is that it created this weird, less embarrassing mythology for why Michael Jordan did that whole retire from basketball, join minor league baseball, start playing basketball thing. I think more people should do that. I imagine Micky Rourke's mythology would be amazing. It would probably involve him fighting mechanical golems in al-Jazari's abandoned laboratory.

As for this article, I don't know enough about sports to understand the finer points. However, this shit was still funny:

"the team with the higher offensive efficiency is pretty much by definition the team that wins the game. The issue is selection bias — we see more successful Monstars’ possessions in the movie. The other issue is that the movie doesn’t make any sense."
posted by Uppity Pigeon #2 at 9:27 PM on May 12, 2011 [3 favorites]


Fun fact: the Space Jam website is still up.
posted by cog_nate at 9:41 PM on May 12, 2011 [2 favorites]


Speaking of Space Jam, I rather enjoyed the Futurama send-up of the movie that coincidentally aired on Comedy Central earlier today.

Marv Albert: Ladies and gentlemen, something very strange has just happened... in this basketball game between space clowns and atomic monsters.
posted by Rhaomi at 9:41 PM on May 12, 2011


Fun fact: the Space Jam website is still up.

!!! Frames! Where have you been, buddy?
posted by Uppity Pigeon #2 at 9:50 PM on May 12, 2011 [1 favorite]


It took going to the Space Jam website in 2011 to make me realize MJ shot 42% from beyond the arc in 1995-96.
posted by nathancaswell at 2:01 AM on May 13, 2011


The state-of-the-art in web gaming as of fifteen years ago.
posted by JHarris at 3:30 AM on May 13, 2011


In 1994, an alien spacecraft lands in a minor league ballpark in rural Alabama, delivering Birmingham Barons outfielder Michael Jordan just in time for the first pitch.

Having grown up in Birmingham and been to several of those Birmingham Baron games in which Jordan played:

1)I had no idea this was referenced in Space Jam. Is it really?

2)The Hoover Metropolitan Stadium isn't exactly in a rural area. It's in a highly populated suburb of Birmingham, the largest population center in AL. Get your facts straight, HCSAC.

Also:

• Jordan’s usage rate is 44 percent, meaning he used 44 percent of his team’s possessions. For comparison’s sake, the NBA single-season record is Kobe’s 39 percent in 2006. Jordan is second at 38 percent. He did have plenty of games where he actually exceeded that 44 percent usage rate. In Game 6 of the 1998 Finals, for instance, he checked in at 55 percent. This is probably the second-most realistic part of the movie.

May be my favorite part of that whole exercise.
posted by This Guy at 5:03 AM on May 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Bill Simmons would enjoy this. He once compiled a theoretical box score (near the end of the column) for Hickory High's starting five in the 1951 Indiana High School basketball championship (from the film Hoosiers). He has Chitwood dropping 30 out of Hickory's 42 points, FYI.
posted by Rock Steady at 6:17 AM on May 13, 2011


> I rather enjoyed the Futurama send-up of the movie...

Me, too. Might be my single favourite episode. "And that's the half, with the Supermen up 48-42. Surprisingly dull, so far."
posted by The Card Cheat at 7:25 AM on May 13, 2011


Yosemite Sam isn't listed on the Tunes lineup, which means that Pulp Fiction bit where he and Elmer shot an opposing player really should have drawn a technical for inellegible player on the court. Terrible officiating.
posted by ormondsacker at 8:35 AM on May 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Wow. Blast from the past.

I worked on Space Jam for 4 insane months including four 125+ hour weeks at the very end!!!
posted by Hairy Lobster at 9:15 AM on May 13, 2011


"Wow. Blast from the past.

I worked on Space Jam for 4 insane months including four 125+ hour weeks at the very end!!!
posted by Hairy Lobster at 9:15 AM on May 13
"

Aewsome. Thanks for putting in the effort! I really enjoyed Space Jam when I first saw it in the theatre (on a date no less).
posted by Vindaloo at 11:16 AM on May 13, 2011


Reminds of this analysis of a great Looney Tunes episode. (long, worth the read)
posted by Four Flavors at 3:36 PM on May 13, 2011


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