Seriously. What *is* up with sneakers?

May 25, 2011 1:45 PM

An exhaustive guide to the sneakers worn by Jerry Seinfeld over the course of Seinfeld's 9-year run.

_{Apologies in advance for the excessive pagination.}

Evidently, sneaker collecting is an actual thing, and is quietly regaining popularity, with its own blogosphere, conventions, forums, and release calendars. Akin to the release of highly-anticipated video games, movies, albums, and comic books; sneaker stores will open at midnight, and queues will form around the block in anticipation of the unveiling of this season's hottest new kicks.

posted by schmod (38 comments total)

I am more interested in the bikes.
posted by coachfortner at 1:47 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

This seems an appropriate thread to link to my current favorite Twitter account, Every 80s Comic.
posted by Apropos of Something at 1:48 PM on May 25, 2011

This is also a pretty good overview of all the horrible mom jeans Seinfeld also liked to wear.
posted by The Card Cheat at 1:53 PM on May 25, 2011 [5 favorites]

I saw the Seinfeld sneaker collection earlier today, but quit after ~3 pages when I realized that it was 50 single-picture pages long. But wow, what a piece of work!
posted by mysterpigg at 1:57 PM on May 25, 2011

Call me when there's paintings of each one.
posted by damehex at 1:59 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

What kind of sneakers did the bizarro Jerry wear? Kangaroos?
posted by orme at 2:00 PM on May 25, 2011

My God, it is 50 single-picture pages long. It's like a whole website - about nothing.
posted by Curious Artificer at 2:01 PM on May 25, 2011 [6 favorites]

Seinfeld just makes me cringe--he and his show are so intertwined with my high school experience growing up in NYC that it's worse than looking back at any yearbook. The mom jeans, the white sneakers, the "What is the deal with blah?," the gentle bourgeois humor--it just makes my skin crawl now. Seinfeld is like my embarrassing goth phase; I simply cannot bear looking at it again.

At the time though, holy fuck, I was entranced. Thursday nights on NBC were like going to church or something. And it was huge to go to school the next day quoting the big jokes.

Much props for this crazy kicks nut. I can't imagine the effort that went into this (even leaving aside my own visceral reaction to Seinfeld).
posted by Admiral Haddock at 2:02 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

So many terrible white shoes.
posted by smackfu at 2:02 PM on May 25, 2011 [4 favorites]

Admiral Haddock: "Seinfeld just makes me cringe"

You're not alone, and may find this to be enlightening. (WARNING: TVTropes)
posted by schmod at 2:09 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

Originally read this as "sweaters" and didn't remember him wearing many...

I had a coworker who collected Nike Air Jordan shoes. His apartment was a two bedroom plus den where the den was where he kept all of his Air Jordan shoes.

It really creeped me out that he bought used shoes on Ebay.
posted by jillithd at 2:16 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

So first there's the Cosby Sweaters Project, and now there's Seinfeld's sneakers. Any other [:Comedian with eponymous show:]'s S[a-z]ea[a-z]ers out there? Louie CK's speakers? Bob Newhart's shearers?
posted by kmz at 2:17 PM on May 25, 2011 [5 favorites]

That coworker and his wife were avid basketball fans - not sure if that is what helps drive this?
posted by jillithd at 2:19 PM on May 25, 2011

The too-tight jeans are all-too-familiar to me but the multifarious sneaker collection is something i never before noticed.
posted by blucevalo at 2:22 PM on May 25, 2011

An exhaustive guide to the sneakers worn by Jerry Seinfeld

Just reading those words exhausted me.
posted by StickyCarpet at 2:28 PM on May 25, 2011 [2 favorites]

I like this post, because it's two so wildly divergent things smashed together, both of which are interesting. Sneakerhead culture is actually kind of fascinating, and the shoes can be seen as a kind of tightly restrictive artistic medium which draws the same kind of talented and developed artists that, e.g., street art draws. And collecting it's a lot cheaper (though still startlingly expensive).

And then there's Seinfeld and his weirdly iconic sneakers, and the detail-obsession that Internet so lovingly fosters. Love this post. It's like you can see the buttresses.
posted by penduluum at 2:32 PM on May 25, 2011 [2 favorites]

AND WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH JERRY'S MULLET ANYWAY? IT'S LONG, IT'S SHORT, MAKE UP YOUR MIND!
posted by entropicamericana at 2:32 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

An artist friend of mine watched Charlie Rose for 6 years straight and drew the tie he wore from every broadcast.

Take that!
posted by goalyeehah at 2:33 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

An artist friend of mine watched Charlie Rose for 6 years straight and drew the tie he wore from every broadcast.

I'd've done the backdrops.
posted by Sys Rq at 2:39 PM on May 25, 2011

I still use Seinfeld-isms all the time.

What has aged badly for me are the actors. Seinfeld is increasingly challenging Cosby in the hateful crank sweepstakes.
posted by Trurl at 2:47 PM on May 25, 2011

So many terrible white shoes.

That is exactly what I mutter to myself every single time I'm shopping for running shoes. There's all the terrible white ones and the few garish neon ones, and... that's it. No wonder people are so inactive: It's better to be fat than be caught dead in such hideous shoes.
posted by Sys Rq at 3:02 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

posted by penduluum And then there's Seinfeld and his weirdly iconic sneakers, and the detail-obsession that Internet so lovingly fosters. Love this post. It's like you can see the buttresses.

It's a shoe about nothing.
posted by mattdidthat at 3:19 PM on May 25, 2011 [2 favorites]

Unlike Cosby's sweaters, the odd thing is that Seinfeld's sneakers are all so alike... they're all pretty much generic white athletic shoes. The average sneaker freaker walks around in stuff a lot more outré than these shoes.
posted by GuyZero at 3:39 PM on May 25, 2011

And now a complete guide to every belt worn by Jerry throughout the series:















__________________________________________________










Page 0/0



__________________________________________________
posted by Potomac Avenue at 3:46 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

My supervisor is a sneakerhead. He stood in line at the Nike store nearby for hours to get a voucher for the 3D Kobes that came out around the All-Star game, then spent two months trying to procure a pair of 3D glasses to look at 'em with. He's at around 80 pairs altogether, and it's as terrible an affliction as any other fanatic collecting hobby.

I'll admit I'm usually impressed with the turnaround he gets for the ultra-collectible pairs, often trebling his outlay.
posted by carsonb at 4:32 PM on May 25, 2011

I never want to be caught "trebling my outlay."
posted by Lipstick Thespian at 4:38 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

I've never understood the whole shoe obsession thing people seem to have.
posted by jonmc at 4:54 PM on May 25, 2011

It's so nice that there are people who pay attention to those details, but are totally clueless about stuff that happens in the real world.

I think we need Internet Interventions...
posted by Alexandra Kitty at 5:39 PM on May 25, 2011

Eh you gotta collect something. I'm not a sneaker freaker but my Cons wear out every 6 months and it's fun buying new ones.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 5:39 PM on May 25, 2011

Seinfeld is increasingly challenging Cosby in the hateful crank sweepstakes.

...but no mention of Michael Richards? He's pretty much the categorical definition of a hateful crank who used to have a decent comedy career.
posted by schmod at 6:11 PM on May 25, 2011

Evidently, sneaker collecting is an actual thing

See also: Sneaker Pimps - "They took their name from an article the Beastie Boys published in their Grand Royal magazine about a man they hired to track down classic sneakers."
posted by kcds at 6:18 PM on May 25, 2011

The internet has officially run out of stuff to talk about.
posted by nosila at 7:26 PM on May 25, 2011 [3 favorites]

I get a little choked up when I think about the fact that the people of North Korea will never get to see this.
posted by jeremy b at 7:52 PM on May 25, 2011

I'm a sneakerhead. Adidas is my brand. It's an ethical dilemma though. I love flossing a new pair on a beautiful summer day, but I know they were sewn together by some 9 year old in the Philippines for fifteen cents an hour. If I could really put my money where my mouth is, I wouldn't buy them at all. But the addict in me can't say no. I wish Adidas would pull a New Balance and open up a plant in the States so I could feel slightly better about it all. In the meantime I'll continue to feel ethically dubious while having fly-ass sneakers.
posted by Bobby Bittman at 9:02 PM on May 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

It's better to be fat than be caught dead in such hideous shoes.

You can be active and non-fat and still not wear sneakers. I haven't owned a pair since high school - to me there is a distinctly infantile aspect to seeing adults in them.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:48 PM on May 25, 2011

I wear a variety of casual shoes, but for the most part I just wear etnies. It's like sneakers without the excessive flair.
posted by flaterik at 2:57 AM on May 26, 2011

They're all Nike's?
posted by yoga at 7:50 AM on May 26, 2011

They're all Nike's?

Snapple?
posted by Sys Rq at 4:48 PM on May 26, 2011