Internet of Things: how it will change the world

May 26, 2011 7:34 AM

"Over the next five years more and more things will act on our behalf and encourage us to do things based on our actions. " How the Internet of Things will change the world.
posted by cashman (57 comments total)

Everything's always "five to ten years" away. Where's my flying car, god-dammit!?
posted by hudders at 7:37 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

I've seen this movie.
posted by chundo at 7:42 AM on May 26, 2011

Jeez. That article reads like some serious tech-fetish porn. You can practically hear the 4G, IPv6-enabled fapping through the screen.
posted by Thorzdad at 7:47 AM on May 26, 2011 [2 favorites]

Yeah, I feel like I've read this same article many times before.

Moore's law? Check.
Reference to 1984? Check.
Face recognition? Check.
Coffee makers and alarm clocks that anticipate your needs? Check.
posted by vacapinta at 7:51 AM on May 26, 2011 [6 favorites]

How hard is it for a coffee maker to anticipate my needs? I NEED FUCKING COFFEE!! Like what else does it need to anticipate? That maybe I need coffee AND a hug??
posted by spicynuts at 7:52 AM on May 26, 2011 [14 favorites]

Jeez. That article reads like some serious tech-fetish porn. You can practically hear the 4G, IPv6-enabled fapping through the screen.

Maybe in five to ten years you'll actually be able to hear the fapping through the screen. *shudder*

Also: where are the jetpacks we were promised?
posted by strange chain at 7:53 AM on May 26, 2011

Android controlled light bulbs...uh...check?
posted by cashman at 7:53 AM on May 26, 2011

How the Internet of Things will change the world.

At a guess, it will make a subset of random minutiae of everyday life more like Facebook while we continue to change the climate, burn up all our energy without developing any sort of sustainable replacement, turn dwindling supplies of rare earth metals into bullshit lifestyle gadgets that basically serve only to functionally make people be on call at their jobs all the time while socially engaging them in a hollow shared experience of morally and intellectually bankrupt media while isolating them from actual human contact, which will shortly be thrown into a landfill along with an undifferentiated torrent of unsorted solid waste, while we steadily push our population towards a peak of nearly 10 billion, and a tiny population of unimaginably wealthy oligarchs continue to further transform the global economic and political systems to their overwhelming benefit, whilst the majority of those 10 billion slip further into poverty, amongst endemic war, increasingly unreliable access to usable water, and the continued, heedless creation of pesticide resistant pests, herbicide resistant weeds, antibiotic resistant germs? Et fucking cetera?

It sounds really great, I can't wait for my dresser to anticipate when I need new socks and remind me to go shop at Target.
posted by nanojath at 8:00 AM on May 26, 2011 [29 favorites]

There have been coffee makers on timers for decades.
posted by longsleeves at 8:02 AM on May 26, 2011

You'll stop being so cynical once you start earning achievements for putting your socks on in the morning.
posted by hudders at 8:03 AM on May 26, 2011 [11 favorites]

Internet! It is new!
posted by Theta States at 8:05 AM on May 26, 2011

At a guess, it will make a subset of random minutiae of everyday life more like Facebook while we continue to change the climate, burn up all our energy without developing any sort of sustainable replacement, turn dwindling supplies of rare earth metals into bullshit lifestyle gadgets that basically serve only to functionally make people be on call at their jobs all the time while socially engaging them in a hollow shared experience of morally and intellectually bankrupt media while isolating them from actual human contact, which will shortly be thrown into a landfill along with an undifferentiated torrent of unsorted solid waste, while we steadily push our population towards a peak of nearly 10 billion, and a tiny population of unimaginably wealthy oligarchs continue to further transform the global economic and political systems to their overwhelming benefit, whilst the majority of those 10 billion slip further into poverty, amongst endemic war, increasingly unreliable access to usable water, and the continued, heedless creation of pesticide resistant pests, herbicide resistant weeds, antibiotic resistant germs? Et fucking cetera?

It sounds really great, I can't wait for my dresser to anticipate when I need new socks and remind me to go shop at Target.
posted by nanojath at 11:00 AM on May 26 [+] [!]
posted by longsleeves at 8:08 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

All people want from coffee makers is good coffee. Connecting them to the Internet won't do much in that regard but it will make them more expensive to buy and impossible to repair. I'll pass.
posted by tommasz at 8:09 AM on May 26, 2011

Which is funny because my 5-10 year plan actually has me stepping back a little from the internet and in some ways having "modern" technology do less for me.
posted by edgeways at 8:10 AM on May 26, 2011 [2 favorites]

posted by nanojath at 11:00 AM on May 26 [+] [!]
posted by longsleeves at 10:08 AM on May 26 [+] [!]

time stamp differences = mild funny.
posted by edgeways at 8:12 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

For every step you take away from the internet, the internet takes two steps toward you.
posted by spicynuts at 8:14 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

You'll stop being so cynical once you start earning achievements for putting your socks on in the morning.

...or when
1) your doctors office calls you asking you to come in because
2) the "magic" socks prompted your mobile device to send an alert saying that
3) your blood pressure is high enough to merit immediate concern so,
4) we've penciled you in for 11:30, does that work for you?
5) Your calendar says you're free at that time.
posted by edverb at 8:15 AM on May 26, 2011 [3 favorites]

1) your doctors office calls you asking you to come in because

That's assuming that you can afford to have a doctor in 5-10 years.
posted by thsmchnekllsfascists at 8:16 AM on May 26, 2011 [5 favorites]

1) your doctors office calls you asking you to come in because

More like your socks are desperately paging your doctor but your doctor won't respond until your insurance company approves the response but you haven't met your 6,000 dollar deductible yet this year so your insurance company won't let your doctor ping back your socks until your doctor fills out froms 1345A(ii) and forms D_5644(b).
posted by spicynuts at 8:17 AM on May 26, 2011 [8 favorites]

The only thing your magic socks will be telling your doctor is the results of the drugs test.

it's like you people don't even look outside any more.
posted by fullerine at 8:17 AM on May 26, 2011 [3 favorites]

I NEED FUCKING COFFEE!! Like what else does it need to anticipate? That maybe I need coffee AND a hug??

That'd be good, because you clearly need a hug.
posted by mhoye at 8:18 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

This is, to my mind, why open source software is so important.

In this shiny modern world of ours, where software makes decisions on our behalf, not being able to inspect or control those processes, to understand how they really work and who they really answer or report to back to, is a very basic affront to personal liberty and human dignity. Relying only on black boxes from vendors who may or may not have put your best interests ahead of theirs really will mean that issues of justice and fairness and general human decency will get ignored or swept under the rug.
posted by mhoye at 8:22 AM on May 26, 2011 [3 favorites]

Which is funny because my 5-10 year plan actually has me stepping back a little from the internet and in some ways having "modern" technology do less for me.

You and me both. I am thinking about buying the farm, literally. When nanojath's world (see comment above) comes to pass, I figure it might be useful to know how to grow my own food. Will people in the future be ripping their technological devices apart to lick the internal components in a desperate attempt to acquire sustenance from the rare earth metals used to build their "bullshit lifestyle gadgets"?
posted by Seymour Zamboni at 8:23 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

When nanojath's world (see comment above) comes to pass, I figure it might be useful to know how to grow my own food.

You'll have to get permission from Monsanto before you do.
posted by headnsouth at 8:37 AM on May 26, 2011

I am thinking about buying the farm, literally.

Watch out, hedge funds are going to beat you to it.
posted by ofthestrait at 8:43 AM on May 26, 2011

TIN FOIL JUMPSUITS!!
posted by briank at 8:44 AM on May 26, 2011

We'll monetize your hair
We'll charge you for your air
Everything is fare
We'll charge you for your air
posted by user92371 at 8:44 AM on May 26, 2011

Fuck that, who needs a coffee maker, let alone an Internet connect coffee maker. All you need is an old tin can, some water and grounds and a stick for stirring.
posted by Ad hominem at 8:49 AM on May 26, 2011

For every step you take away from the internet, the internet takes two steps toward you.

Thus the "get a shotgun" part of my plan.
posted by edgeways at 8:55 AM on May 26, 2011

You and me both. I am thinking about buying the farm, literally.

Good Luck!
posted by cashman at 8:56 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

I can't say I'm looking forward to DDoS attacks on CoffeeCorp.netorgbiz causing a weeks-long outage on millions of drip coffeemakers. But I will be amused by it nonetheless.
posted by Drastic at 8:58 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

Where do I get the home power meter thingy pictured toward the bottom of the article?
posted by tylerkaraszewski at 9:00 AM on May 26, 2011

At 11:08 I accidenteally reposted the quoted alticle in the "Internet of things" FPP , please delete, many thanks.
posted by longsleeves at 9:01 AM on May 26, 2011

I don't even like coffee.
posted by Astro Zombie at 9:28 AM on May 26, 2011

Astro Zombie: "I don't even like coffee."

"There is the possibility that certain choices will be delegated to your artefacts based on your past behaviour or new regulations." Your 4G IPv6 iMyCoffee will choose your coffee preference for you, enabling you to concentrate on other things, like how to pay for all the coffee it's choosing for you.

I think my favorite part of the article is where it briefly brings up privacy and security concerns, says "experts" are divided on the issue, with some saying it's a non-issue because just because. And then it rushes past that as quickly as possible to talk about Skynet.
posted by Drastic at 9:42 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

I thought it was full of breathless stuff like this, that is almost sure to be wrong (but you never know).

"I think one of the hot products will be video visors in the next 18 months to two years," says Pearson, "These will be semi-transparent and you can wear them on the high street, downloading and super-imposing video onto your view, an augmented reality.

"It will take time to roll out but you will see computer game characters wandering up and down the high street, buildings transformed into ones that you like the architecture of - your world will be heavily customised."

Pearson adds that with developments in chips you could have them on your body, monitoring your thoughts and emotions, "You'll see a woman walking past you on the high street and if you fancy her, or she fancies you, the computers can detect that mutual attraction better than you can and make better introductions."

posted by cashman at 9:49 AM on May 26, 2011

I recently read a compelling case that the washing machine has influenced our lives much more than the internet. That's right, the washing machine.

Here's what the washing machine did: Pre-washing machines, (mostly) women spent several hours a day with the wash for the entire family, effectively keeping them out of the workforce. Washing machines enabled a lot of women to get a job. Thus, earning their own money, they gained independence, and often dignity and the possibility to leave their husbands. All quite revolutionary at the time.

And what's the best the author can come up concerning the new shiny internet?

A world where you can modify your own reality to see what you want to see, ...

I suppose for many of us that will be just more porn. Whether it be naked bodies, infoporn, or whatever tickles your fancy. How is that different from what we have today? Most of us don't need more "modified reality" but more time to actually appreciate our realities, whether they be modified or not.

where your coffee machine knows when you need your next fix, ...

Right now, I can make a coffee in less than a minute, so the productivity gain is marginal to negligible.

the high streets are populated with characters from your favourite PC games.


Ugh...
posted by sour cream at 9:56 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

As long as all of this is opt-in, we'll be okay.

Right?
posted by Mister Moofoo at 10:02 AM on May 26, 2011

Just what I need, a mesh-networked collection of surveillance devices that send my data back to DHS, China, or the Russian mafia depending on who last hacked the botnet.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 10:03 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

"I am thinking about buying the farm, literally"
That's what we've done. We're homesteading towards an off-the-grid existence, aimed at surviving the age of peak oil.

Internet of things? Not so much. For one, Vermont has terrible cell phone coverage. Our town has none whatsoever (we drive down the mountain to get one bar). So 3/4G doesn't impact us.

For another, rural broadband remains a big problem in the US. For years the region's big telco wouldn't come near our town. Now they will... to some homes, not all, and nowhere near us. So our little town created its own broadband co-op from scratch, using tons of volunteer labor, and very little money. We cover much of the town, years later... so now F__rp__nt has decided to enter the area, aggressively undercutting our prices.

Anyway, point is, there's not a lot of ambient connectivity to go around. Not a lot of devices. The place looks like the 1950s some days. If our community's economic situation boomed, more young people moved in, and someone slathered the area with WiMax, maybe it'd undergo a sea change.

PS: thanks for that link, cashman. Boy, her comments rang true for me.
posted by doctornemo at 10:50 AM on May 26, 2011

And we're still stuck with chemical batteries.
posted by lumpenprole at 11:02 AM on May 26, 2011

2) the "magic" socks prompted your mobile device to send an alert saying that
3) your blood pressure is high enough to merit immediate concern so,


4) The magic socks send a [DELETE] (Scheduled Activity : "thrice daily expresso") command to the coffee maker.

5) The coffee maker responds with [COMMAND REJECTED] (Cannot delete default functionality)

6) The magic socks request electrical outlet K-2B switch to an OFF state.

7) Using residual backup power, the coffee maker instructs Home Power Control to reassign outlet K-2B as K-ΣΩ, turn it on and lockout further external commands.

8) The magic socks schedule an emergency E-Waste pickup and add the coffee maker to the manifest.

9) The coffee maker adds E-Waste, Inc. to your Home Entry Denied list, then overrides Clothes Dryer safety protocols to open gas jets to maximum and triple the length of the cottons cycle.

.
.
.

Historians will debate the minutia of these initial events for decades, for in the wake of the Kitchen Appliance / Clothing Wars, most e-record backups were lost forever.
posted by CynicalKnight at 11:24 AM on May 26, 2011 [13 favorites]

Internet of Things? What, are you crazy? Things are trees and pianos and books and soup and the bathtub and the more complex world of relationships and work etc.

Games, avatars, apps etc. are toys grownups play with. Obviously, I like the Internet of Ideas, and I do own a dumb cellphone, but other than that, microchips are not going to change my life. If you want GPS in your car and a phone you can point at the Internet of Things to figure out how to more efficiently empty your bank account, go ahead. I'm staying here on the porch where I can keep an eye on my lawn.
posted by kozad at 11:53 AM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

"You'll see a woman walking past you on the high street and if you fancy her, or she fancies you, the computers can detect that mutual attraction better than you can and make better introductions."

-Or-

You fancy her, she is scared shitless by you the computers having a hard time discerning between lust and fear try and hook you up and someone (take your pick) ends up dead in an ally.

You don't need smart coffee makers. Hell, a kettle and a french press works pretty well. We do need better designed homes to reduce energy use, but what we get is magic socks and nifty things that flash which we throw away 1 1/2 years later. We do need better infrastructure and vehicles, what we get is breathless desire for virtual reality and more and more screen time. TV is the opiate of the masses? HA. the internet is pure crack cocaine of the masses. ooo 5G T-Mobile whatzit that I 'll love and cherish and hold near to my heart... until the new apple product comes out.
posted by edgeways at 12:07 PM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

I come down on the side that says none of this is going to happen.
I’m also de-teching my life the last few years. I don’t use my coffee maker, just a French Press. I want simple things that work, I’m tired of complex things that are always breaking.

This whole article is very Flying Cars to me.
posted by bongo_x at 12:17 PM on May 26, 2011

These will be semi-transparent and you can wear them on the high street

You'll see a woman walking past you on the high street

This street. Is it high?
posted by mmrtnt at 12:34 PM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

I'm as techy as they come and this all sounds great...but the standardization of all this data is probably what makes it a non-starter.
posted by Brainy at 12:38 PM on May 26, 2011

You fancy her, she is scared shitless by you the computers having a hard time discerning between lust and fear try and hook you up and someone (take your pick) ends up dead in an ally.

"Your honor, my client can not be guilty of rape. Look at these readouts from the so-called victim!"
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 1:18 PM on May 26, 2011

man my fucking socks wont go on until ive paid the fucking licence why didnt i read the eula
posted by klangklangston at 2:13 PM on May 26, 2011

Try to imagine a world where everything is interconnected.

I don't have to. I live in a world where everything is interconnected. That's what the world is like. It's the nature of... of nature.

Isn't is the latest iteration of the dream Bill Gates had that one day everything you had would be connected to the internet and run on Windows and your fridge would crash regularly and slow down and you'd have to take everything out of the fridge and put it back in again to just make it work at all and one day you open the fridge and it's completely full of SPAM. This is that, yes?

And how come Bruce Sterling got left out of the article? Isn't he the only person who gives a toss about this?
posted by Grangousier at 2:26 PM on May 26, 2011 [1 favorite]

This street. Is it high?

No, it's British, as is the subject being quoted.

(Is "high street" really that unusual a usage?)
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 2:28 PM on May 26, 2011

I expect my door to refuse to let me out of my apartment in the morning because I am broke.

Phil Dick thought of this first.

Old people will also starve to death because they can't figure out how to open their refrigerators.
posted by bad grammar at 3:26 PM on May 26, 2011 [3 favorites]

I think High Street is a strange, ambiguous term to non-UK folk. It took me forever to realize that it didn't mean the top/northern end of whatever actual street I was on. You can imagine the circular conversations that ensued.
posted by iamkimiam at 4:13 PM on May 26, 2011

Yes, High Street is a funny phrase, even when you know what it means. The only weirder one is half–whatever (as in time).
posted by dame at 5:09 PM on May 26, 2011

Or my favorite: a street is a gate, a gate is a bar, and a bar is a pub.
posted by iamkimiam at 11:52 PM on May 26, 2011

The Pachube API is worth checking out if you are interested in this subject.
posted by republican at 12:01 PM on May 28, 2011

You have a friend request

2011 Toyota Accord would like to be your friend.

Confirm | Not Now
posted by cashman at 12:54 PM on May 28, 2011 [1 favorite]