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cat I have no idea how you got into these places cat or why
May 27, 2011 1:57 PM   Subscribe

Cats, where they do NOT belong.
posted by Potomac Avenue (59 comments total) 15 users marked this as a favorite

 
Scanners?
posted by ricochet biscuit at 2:00 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


wedged. The word you're looking for is wedged.
posted by zamboni at 2:01 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


Cats belong everywhere.

At least that's how they see it.
posted by Trurl at 2:04 PM on May 27, 2011 [4 favorites]


Cats go wherever they damned well please. Your opinion doesn't really matter to them.
posted by daniel_charms at 2:05 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


get out of there cat. you cannot lay in that box. i know that it’s almost the perfect size for you but that does not mean it is for you. cats and boxes just do not mix.

WTF are you talking about? Of course cats and boxes mix.

Also, it's "lie," not "lay."

Also also, where are the attributions/credit links for the photos? Are they submissions? In which case, credit would be good. Were they scraped from somewhere else? In which case, bad cat! At least link to the originals!
posted by rtha at 2:06 PM on May 27, 2011 [3 favorites]


Why does the woman making the video of the cat not getting off the chair not just pick it up? It's not like it's a lion, or something, and it's too big to lift. Just pick it up. It's quite simple.
posted by Solomon at 2:08 PM on May 27, 2011


Is there something wrong with capitalization these days?
posted by octothorpe at 2:09 PM on May 27, 2011


I was going to post this! Those crazy cats!
posted by the young rope-rider at 2:11 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


Also, it's "lie," not "lay."

That's already been addressed, actually.
posted by Vibrissa at 2:15 PM on May 27, 2011 [2 favorites]


I posted this as a link in a single-link kitty thread a while back but I've since dropped it from my tumblr feeds. It started accepting submissions and overflowing with repetitive kitties. I mean, I like kitties where they, in fact I love two of them who are probably somewhere they don't belong doing something they shouldn't be doing right this very second, but .... I need three or four of these on my dash every day, not the three or four every couple of hours I was getting for a while there.

Sorry for ranting about this again, but people, edit your single-topic tumblrs if you open the to submissions, please! I would love to subscribe and/or follow, but not if you're going to open the floodgates to everything all the time. Pick a few of the best and let the rest go.
posted by immlass at 2:17 PM on May 27, 2011


Is there something wrong with capitalization these days?

no, you can't has capslock
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 2:19 PM on May 27, 2011


Thank you, I now have a new name for my cats when they sit on my printer: "half-assed paper cat."
posted by filthy light thief at 2:20 PM on May 27, 2011


get off of there cat. you cannot be on my treadmill. i know you want to beat my 14 minute mile record but i do not think you will be able to run that fast cat. you will get halfway there and decide to sleep instead.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 2:21 PM on May 27, 2011 [2 favorites]


Am I the only person on the planet who thinks letting a cat walk or lie or sleep on a kitchen bench - aka a food preparation area - is gross? I'd be shooing it off while shuddering and then obsessively cleaning the bench, not grabbing the camera.

Or is this why I'm not a cat person?
posted by malibustacey9999 at 2:21 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


Any over/under on when cheezburger inc. does exactly the same thing with watermarked pics and more advertising?
posted by ardgedee at 2:21 PM on May 27, 2011


Am I the only person on the planet who thinks letting a cat walk or lie or sleep on a kitchen bench - aka a food preparation area - is gross?

No you are not. These are baaaaaaaaaaaaad kitties. They should not be there.
posted by bonehead at 2:23 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


Why does the woman making the video of the cat not getting off the chair not just pick it up? It's not like it's a lion, or something, and it's too big to lift. Just pick it up. It's quite simple.

In my experience, attempting to sit in the chair will get the cat to move. Or get squished. Your call, kitty.
posted by birdherder at 2:28 PM on May 27, 2011


The premise of this post is flawed.
posted by adamvasco at 2:33 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


Get Out From Under That Hat, Cat!
Yes, I'm Aware Of Your Book,
And How You Started That Look.

But A Staircase Is No Place To Hold A Rave,
So Please, Cat, Please - Just Behave!
posted by Smart Dalek at 2:35 PM on May 27, 2011 [5 favorites]


Meh. It's not a bad concept but it's kinda poorly executed, especially the accompanying text which just gets annoyingly repetitive & overly verbose. He's in love with his idea & says the same thing over & over & over. I like a good meme as much as the next guy, but this ain't it. Sorry.
posted by scalefree at 2:41 PM on May 27, 2011 [3 favorites]


Cats in things they're not supposed to be are amazing.
(nsfw lyrics)
posted by Lorc at 2:50 PM on May 27, 2011 [2 favorites]


Ooh, I recently took a pic of my friend's cat Steve laying on Judas Priest's Point of Entry LP. I should send that it to the blog. But then again, what else is that album good for but for cats to sit on it? Maybe I should start my own blog of cats lying on bad metal albums.
posted by medeine at 2:52 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


Have you seen this cat?
posted by Malor at 2:55 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


having to take care of two cats from same litter, its taken time to be sure that cats look down on people. the next conclusion drawn is that they have more than one level of sleep, when in deep sleep, if startled and slowly moving around, they are not awake, but in a light level of sleep. they are not awake as humans are, the only thing on their minds is to get back to a deeper level of sleep.
posted by taxpayer at 3:12 PM on May 27, 2011


Haven't you been here before, cat? I can't find you when I search MetaFilter for you but I know that you have been here before. Don't look at me that way, cat. I guess it's not that you don't belong here so much as you belonged here once and now I don't think you do but you are just a stupid cat and cannot search this website any better than I can.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 3:15 PM on May 27, 2011


Am I the only person on the planet who thinks letting a cat walk or lie or sleep on a kitchen bench - aka a food preparation area - is gross?

Probably you would not want to eat dinner at my house.
posted by something something at 3:16 PM on May 27, 2011 [16 favorites]


Am I the only person on the planet who thinks letting a cat walk or lie or sleep on a kitchen bench - aka a food preparation area - is gross?

Oh, I remember those halcyon days of thinking there was a division between "human" stuff and "cat" stuff. I think it died around the day I forgot to keep an eye on the last bowl of milk or applesauce* or mac & cheese and, after a resigned sigh, eating my cat's leftovers.

They really do know when they don't belong, though! Guilty looks are too cute.

*vegetarian kitteh's favorite
posted by lesli212 at 3:22 PM on May 27, 2011


I find the photos are cute, but the whole thing is really funny if you read all the captions as being about the same cat, and the photos are mere for illustrative purposes.

I mean, that's one very troublesome cat!
posted by hippybear at 3:45 PM on May 27, 2011


Probably you would not want to eat dinner at my house.

I got that beat.
posted by nicwolff at 4:11 PM on May 27, 2011 [3 favorites]


It's the paws, people. I wouldn't let my kids walk on my kitchen bench even though I KNOW their feet haven't been in a litter tray.

something something & nicwolff, is it okay if I bring takeaway?

posted by malibustacey9999 at 4:20 PM on May 27, 2011


I really don't get the cat thing.
posted by whimsicalnymph at 4:26 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


I really don't get the cat thing.

They're these little furry creatures that chase mice and bugs and make "meow" sounds and sleep a lot and do funny things and scratch stuff and are content to eat the same food like every day and they also shit and piss in a box of sand.
posted by Hoopo at 4:43 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


vegetarian kitteh's favorite

Sorry, there is no such thing as a vegetarian kitteh.

We don't let our cats do anywhere near food preparation areas, and we never have, but of course that doesn't mean they don't continually try anyway, just in case we change our minds. Or we aren't looking. Or we're having shrimp.
posted by misha at 4:44 PM on May 27, 2011


Sorry, there is no such thing as a vegetarian kitteh.

I had a cat in college that I am sad to say was somewhat neglected, she sometimes had to eat what I was eating, which was mostly beefaroni and cold cuts. She would try to steal anything I was eating, if I was eating sphaghetti with butter on it and I left it unguarded I would come back to find her licking a big clump of sphaghetti on the floor. On day I came home to find her gnawing on a raw steak in the middle of the floor, that was the first time I was tempted to steal food from a cat.

Years later I decided to try all my girlfriend's cat's food. He ate very expensive food, one of which was "Beef Tips in Aspic", I figured that shit must be pretty good so I ate a spoonfull and it was awful, I resigned to feeding him only the best foods. From that day on it was nothing but buttermilk (I prepared a dairy flight of whole milk, heavy cream, and buttermilk and he liked the buttermilk best) and roast beef, until she made me stop and switched him back to that horrible beef tips in aspic. Come to think of it, she probably only let me feed him that once.

He is sadly passed on now, but I will always remember how happy he was scarfing down that roast beef.
posted by Ad hominem at 5:03 PM on May 27, 2011


The worst I ever saw, Warning, Scary: Cat crushed in TOP of garage door, walks away unharmed.
posted by charlie don't surf at 5:07 PM on May 27, 2011


I had a cat in college that I am sad to say was somewhat neglected

In before: "The cat was in college?" yes, the cat was in college.
posted by Ad hominem at 5:08 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


I have a few of these.
posted by The Hamms Bear at 5:16 PM on May 27, 2011 [3 favorites]


Nope, definitely such a thing as a vegetarian kitteh, believe it.

My beloved Honey's favorite foods were, in approximate order:
watermelon, corn, tomato, apple, potato, prune, pear, and cheese.

As a kitten he climbed up my pants in order to eat watermelon out of my hands. That was my first clue that something was not quite normal with him. We used to have to lock the fruit and vegetables in the laundry room because otherwise he would hop up on the counter and eat them. We had to stop growing tomato plants indoors.

Yes, he ate normal cat food too, but only hard food; he wouldn't touch the canned stuff. I was never neglectful of his nutrition; probably the worst thing that ever happened was that he got tipsy on rum fruitcake - but how could he resist, since it was filled with all that fruit?

If that's not a vegetarian kitteh, I don't know what is.
posted by lesli212 at 5:35 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


Oh, and somehow Honey never had poop problems. I know! Crazy! Very unlike my current cat, the poop monster.
posted by lesli212 at 5:42 PM on May 27, 2011


It's 10:58. Do you know where your cat is?
posted by mokeydraws at 6:12 PM on May 27, 2011


Upon my return, a housesitter asked me "are the cats allowed on the kitchen table?" and I said no, and she explained "I didn't think so, because they looked *so smug*"
posted by rmd1023 at 7:08 PM on May 27, 2011 [5 favorites]


Malibustacey9999, have another helping of Toxoplasma gondii.

Presto! No problems with kitty on the counter.
posted by BlueHorse at 7:53 PM on May 27, 2011


I'm sure it's because I'm old, but what is it about the Tumblr setup that's supposed to impress me anyway? I do not get it.

I mean, this is fine, and so is Fuck Yeah, Victorians! and such, but why is the Tumblr platform the one for memes now?

/adjusts onion on her belt
posted by emjaybee at 7:55 PM on May 27, 2011 [2 favorites]


lesli212 - Apparently watermelon-loving cats is a thing.

Fruitcake, now--that may be unique to Honey. My old cat's favorite was mint chocolate chip ice cream...
posted by hippugeek at 7:57 PM on May 27, 2011 [2 favorites]


I've started referring to the cat I live with as the "Clippy of the Kitchen" as it doesn't matter what food you've begun preparing, vegetarian or otherwise, or even just coffee, and she'll just appear at your feet. Meowing, or lolling around as if to say: "Hi there! I see you're trying to eat something. Would you like some help with that? I can eat many different foods with my stomach wizard, let me show you!"
This cat has no shame or boundaries when it comes to food. She eats cast away bird food and hay, dead elm leaves and house plants. Anything remotely nom-able can and will be eaten.
posted by Cold Lurkey at 8:05 PM on May 27, 2011 [9 favorites]


Average Cats and Buzzkilling did this better. On the other hand, cats do need constant reminding that they are cats and not laundry or breakfast cereal.
posted by Metroid Baby at 8:51 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


This website kind-of sucks.
posted by teatime at 9:20 PM on May 27, 2011


This website kind-of sucks.

Get off from there you comment! you don't belong there it os not you're place. stop commenting already commentor! Get down of there now! HAHAHAHAHA
posted by Devils Rancher at 10:00 PM on May 27, 2011 [1 favorite]


Anecdotal: cats love luggage, either (closed) as a resting platform, or (open) as a hidden fortress.

Came home last night to find ours hanging out in the laundry hamper, with the lid closed.

Sorry felines, but this is why we attach bells to you.
posted by ShutterBun at 1:34 AM on May 28, 2011


This site makes me nervous.

My own cats never jump on tables. They won't even jump on the counter, even if I leave seafood on it. They don't jump into my lap--although they will graciously stay if I put them there. They have willingly limited themselves to the floor, the bed, and the backs of couches.

It's too good to be true. I'm beginning to suspect that what I have are not actually cats, and that I've fallen for some kind of horrible trap. One day I'm going to wake up with no face because they've eaten it, or something.

I've got to find a box and test to see if they really are cats.
posted by Kutsuwamushi at 1:42 AM on May 28, 2011 [3 favorites]


My cat is snoring gently on the bed next to mrs. arcticseal. He belongs right here thank you very much.
posted by arcticseal at 3:09 AM on May 28, 2011


Why does the woman making the video of the cat not getting off the chair not just pick it up? It's not like it's a lion, or something, and it's too big to lift. Just pick it up. It's quite simple.

It is definitely not that simple. The cat may surrender the chair if you forcibly remove it, but it will not be happy, and it will get back at you.

About a year and a half ago, I was cat-sitting for a friend of a friend in our apartment. This cat has lived in the same apartment maybe a year or two prior, so it knew the territory. It was, after all, her home, and we were just house-sitting.

I have a comfy chair and ottoman that was placed in a nice sunny spot in the living room. So I sat there one day while Kitteh was over, with my laptop on my lap and doing some reading or work or something. Kitteh jumps up in my lap, circles around and acts all cute and stuff. Does that for about 2-3 minutes, then jumps off. Maybe 20 minutes go by, and Kitteh does the same thing. Jumping up and waving her fluffy tail in my face trying to be all "look at me I am cute Kitteh." Jumps down after a couple of minutes and wanders off. Comes to say hello a third time, again affectionately trying to get my attention. I scratch her head, she enjoys it for a minute then jumps off. Wow Kitteh, make up your mind! Maybe a half hour later I get up to use the bathroom, and there behind the ottoman where the screen of my laptop was blocking my field of vision, was a very large, very deliberate poop. Not that smelly, but an obvious signal that Kitteh was really pissed off. So I cleaned it up, went about my own business, and when I came back, Kitteh was sitting in the chair. Where she sat for 4 hours, never getting off once.

Do not be fooled. Your cat isn't trying to be cute and lovey and affectionate. Like the crazy-ass Honey Badger, kitteh will find a way to take what it wantss. This sometimes means trying to act all adorable and shit. But when you prevent a cat from sitting wherever it wants to sit, it will let you know that you have royally pissed it off. Maybe not right away, but it will tell you in its own passive-aggressive cat way.
posted by raztaj at 5:22 AM on May 28, 2011 [2 favorites]


My cat is inside my couch right now and if I move to much he tries to claw me from inside.

Some cats will bite you if you try to remove them from somewhere. Our neighbours cat loved to sleep on top of the soft top convertible and would attack viciously if moved. I used to have to take a towel throw it on top of the cat and quickly dump him on the ground. Often my ankles were attacked after. Just picking them up and removing them isn't always simple.
posted by SpaceWarp13 at 7:07 AM on May 28, 2011


Oh, I should have linked to the video instead of the pic of the (seemingly horribly) trapped cat.

Warning: scary trapped cat, with swearing and inappropriate laugher. Cat walks away unharmed.

And now for comic relief (also via reddit) a bored cat buried in dirt up to its neck. This is the source of the meme "not one fuck was given."

Hey cat, you don't belong there. You get out of that pile of dirt.
posted by charlie don't surf at 4:22 PM on May 28, 2011


I was all ready to hate on this until I saw this and BAHHHMYGODSOCUTE!!!!!
posted by dixiecupdrinking at 10:55 PM on May 28, 2011


A cat finding a thing, in one of three places.
posted by idiopath at 3:03 PM on May 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


Sorry, there is no such thing as a vegetarian kitteh.

True. Cats are carnivores.
posted by krinklyfig at 11:47 PM on May 30, 2011


what is it about the Tumblr setup that's supposed to impress me anyway? I do not get it.

It's easy to use and even easier to view all of the Tumblogs you follow in one place (that really is what I like about it). Plus, it's free.
posted by grubi at 6:12 AM on May 31, 2011


Cats are carnivores.

Except mine's an omnivore. He loves tomatoes, watermelon, and asparagus, as well as pepperoni, chicken, and beef jerky.
posted by grubi at 6:13 AM on May 31, 2011


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