Join 3,382 readers in helping fund MetaFilter (Hide)


June is Goat Trauma Awareness Month
June 1, 2011 6:17 AM   Subscribe

June is Goat Trauma Awareness Month.
posted by AstroGuy (48 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite

 
Geez. Total slam operation on innocent goats. Absolutely any animal can give someone trauma. Next up: house centipede trauma awareness month.

As a delightful ipecac to this pablum, please visit Goats on Things. Hell yeah goats!
posted by the dief at 6:24 AM on June 1, 2011 [6 favorites]


And Goats on Stuff too! Man, I love goats. I love goats so damn much.
posted by the dief at 6:25 AM on June 1, 2011 [3 favorites]


Grew up next to a sheep farm.

Protip: Do not under any circumstance get between a male goat and one of its offspring. It will try to kill you. An angry sheep or goat is a lot more aggressive, fast, and scary than you'd ever imagine.
posted by schmod at 6:26 AM on June 1, 2011


is this something i'd have to have a goat to understand?
posted by pyramid termite at 6:27 AM on June 1, 2011 [5 favorites]


what
posted by valkyryn at 6:31 AM on June 1, 2011


is this something i'd have to have a goat goatse.cx to understand?

FTFY.

And yes, yes it is.
posted by Dr. Eigenvariable at 6:32 AM on June 1, 2011


is this something i'd have to have a goat goatse.cx to understand?

Or you can get to the Chicago meetup to get all the details.
posted by lampshade at 6:35 AM on June 1, 2011


You know, I don't think this is real.
posted by Curious Artificer at 6:35 AM on June 1, 2011


Stay alert. Goats are deceitful and can hide just about anywhere.
posted by ian1977 at 6:36 AM on June 1, 2011 [9 favorites]


is this something i'd have to have a goat to understand?

Is this something I'd have to be a goat to...

...wait.
posted by mrgoat at 6:36 AM on June 1, 2011 [2 favorites]


You know, I don't think this is real.

"Since getting help from the Childhood Goat Trauma Foundation, I've been able to go outside for the first time in twenty-two years! Thank you, CGTF!"

Pretty sure it's not.
posted by valkyryn at 6:38 AM on June 1, 2011


Also.
posted by valkyryn at 6:39 AM on June 1, 2011


Anyone who grew up in PG County Maryland knows goats are scary.
posted by headnsouth at 6:40 AM on June 1, 2011


The Goat Trauma Awareness Tour is scheduled to make a stop in my city in a few weeks!

Oh wait, that's the SARAHPAC One Nation Bus Tour. Sorry. My mistake.
posted by item at 6:44 AM on June 1, 2011


Goats are becoming popular pets among the anti-establishment due to their anti-social behavior.
posted by item at 6:51 AM on June 1, 2011


That site was not anywhere near funny enough to justify the 2 minutes or so that I spent there.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:52 AM on June 1, 2011 [1 favorite]


Sorry they can't all be to your liking flapjax.
posted by AstroGuy at 6:54 AM on June 1, 2011


But speaking of goats, I once held the hind legs of a goat while it was having its neck slit open. It was in Nigeria, where goat is consumed frequently. The goat was gonna be dinner, for me and the family I was living with during my stay there, in 1980/81. Man, that goat screamed the way you or I would scream if we were about to get our throats slit. It was pretty... real. And, whoa, how that goat squirmed and thrashed. Almost lost my grip once or twice. It was a hell of an experience, one that I wouldn't care to repeat.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:57 AM on June 1, 2011 [1 favorite]


Sorry they can't all be to your liking flapjax.

No sweat, AstroGuy!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:58 AM on June 1, 2011


In MY neck of the woods we STARE at goats.


Hoooah!
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 7:11 AM on June 1, 2011


Do not under any circumstance get between a male goat and one of its offspring. It will try to kill you. An angry sheep or goat is a lot more aggressive, fast, and scary than you'd ever imagine.

Do male goats/sheep take an active role in child rearing? That seems sort of different than a large majority of mammal species, and not what I would expect from something as recalcitrant as a goat.

that goat screamed the way you or I would scream if we were about to get our throats slit

Like this?
posted by codacorolla at 7:23 AM on June 1, 2011


Where are the goat crash test videos?
posted by bwg at 7:25 AM on June 1, 2011


"that goat screamed the way you or I would scream if we were about to get our throats slit

Like this?"

*thinks very carefully about clicking that link*

clicks anyway...

"Awww, that's cute!" :D
posted by drstein at 7:25 AM on June 1, 2011


drstein: you'll be happy do know that not only does goat scream like man, but he also croons like Usher.
posted by codacorolla at 7:28 AM on June 1, 2011 [6 favorites]


I thought this was for traumatised goats. I'm more than a little disappointed.
posted by londonmark at 7:28 AM on June 1, 2011 [3 favorites]


Goats are awesome, and tasty.
posted by Xoebe at 7:32 AM on June 1, 2011


what
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 7:32 AM on June 1, 2011


Next up: house centipede trauma awareness month.

Every month is human centipede trauma awareness month.
posted by Cat Pie Hurts at 7:35 AM on June 1, 2011 [3 favorites]


I want goats.

I watch videos like the goat stampede, and I see the photos of goats in trees and then I read articles about fainting goats, and I realize that this is the kind of animal for me.

Which is exactly why I can't ever have them.

Because I'd walk outside and see my tiny adorable pygmy goats up in the tree looking down placidly at me, and the evil part of my brain wouldn't be able to resist clapping my hands and shouting "Boo!" just so that I could stand there, under the tall branches as *thud* the goats *thud* fainted and *thud* fell all around me.

Which in its way, is a completely different kind of goat trauma. I suppose if I brought some children around, when the goats got back up, all angry at having fallen, they could terrorize the little ones and create some future testimonials.

But really, I do want goats, they are awesome.
posted by quin at 7:37 AM on June 1, 2011 [6 favorites]


Fuck goats, the real assholes you need to keep an eye on are geese. Goddamn geese.
posted by aspo at 7:52 AM on June 1, 2011 [3 favorites]


I was traumatized when Goats went on hiatus. Has it been a full year? Is Jon R. going to figure out how to prevent the December 2012 multiverse shutdown (caused by ancient Mayan computer programmers) and get the main characters back from their monochromatic state? And rescue Brock Stalkley (my favorite vegetable character) from Superhell? At least 37 fans like me want to know!!!
posted by oneswellfoop at 7:53 AM on June 1, 2011


Previously. Includes previous goddamn geese.
posted by darksasami at 8:01 AM on June 1, 2011


You can read all about it on the next edition of Small Ruminant Research.
posted by falameufilho at 8:10 AM on June 1, 2011


what
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94


The distended director's cut features more gratuitous ball-shots.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:33 AM on June 1, 2011


You know, of course, this is a triple for the goats here at metafilter, right?
posted by tomswift at 8:42 AM on June 1, 2011


Something about this post makes me feel a little hircine.
posted by jessssse at 8:49 AM on June 1, 2011


I was disappointed that this wasn't about traumatized goats.
posted by TedW at 9:57 AM on June 1, 2011 [1 favorite]


mmm goat!
that's the one thing I miss most here in finland, goat makes the best do pyaaza
posted by infini at 10:31 AM on June 1, 2011


I plan to overcome my fear of overcooking goat this month!

I just picked up Goat: Meat, Milk Cheese a really excellent cookbook a few weeks ago because I have some goat riblets in my freezer from the meat CSA that I had no idea how to cook.
posted by vespabelle at 11:38 AM on June 1, 2011


what
posted by mudpuppie at 11:40 AM on June 1, 2011


I plan to overcome my fear of overcooking goat this month!

I guess the OP didn't realize the direction we'd take with our awareness of trauma to goat
posted by infini at 11:46 AM on June 1, 2011


While other animals such as sheep, cows and horses are not by any means the violent creatures that goats are, goats frequently lurk within a herd, waiting to take advantage of peoples' trust in such animals.
posted by brenton at 1:07 PM on June 1, 2011


That site was not anywhere near funny enough to justify the 2 minutes or so that I spent there.

You didn't rollover the logo on the home page, did you?
posted by slogger at 1:34 PM on June 1, 2011


what
posted by mosk at 3:07 PM on June 1, 2011


what

Amazing.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 4:41 PM on June 1, 2011


And Goats on Stuff too! Man, I love goats. I love goats so damn much.
posted by the dief at 12:25 AM on June 2 [4 favorites +] [!]

Sit down, because I'm going to blow your mind. You can not only eat goat, but through a process I don't understand—it involves nipples and farmers in gumboots—you can eat cheese! Made from a goat!
posted by oxford blue at 6:19 PM on June 1, 2011 [1 favorite]



Geez. Total slam operation on innocent goats. Absolutely any animal can give someone trauma. Next up: house centipede trauma awareness month.


The idea that there are living creatures in the world who aren't me is pretty traumatic.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 6:29 PM on June 1, 2011


Baaa
posted by homunculus at 7:26 PM on June 1, 2011 [1 favorite]


« Older Outside Aperture...  |  Her name is Bacon, and Donald ... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments