Regina George would be proud

August 12, 2011 12:22 PM

Suri's Burn Book Daughter of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes critiques the wardrobe of other famous children, including her siblings.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero (18 comments total)

I HATE IT IS ALL I AM PROGRAMMED TO DO I HATE
posted by cmoj at 12:25 PM on August 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT FOR YOU.
posted by Nomyte at 12:29 PM on August 12, 2011

A. Celebrity/paparazzi nonsense.
B. Leave the kids out of it.
C. When parodying a funny movie bit, actual funny content should be required.
posted by sageleaf at 12:37 PM on August 12, 2011

This is terrible. No, really, this may be the worst post ever on Metafilter.
posted by nathancaswell at 12:38 PM on August 12, 2011 [5 favorites]

We should totally turn this thread into a burn book about ThePinkSuperhero, you guys!
posted by hincandenza at 12:39 PM on August 12, 2011

I'm fine with that.
posted by nathancaswell at 12:39 PM on August 12, 2011

yeah, this is mean. She's just a kid.
posted by sweetkid at 12:40 PM on August 12, 2011

Yeah, not good.
posted by Gator at 12:40 PM on August 12, 2011

ThePinkSuperhero is the nastiest skank bitch I've ever met. DO NOT TRUST HER. She is a fugly slut!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 12:41 PM on August 12, 2011 [6 favorites]

I just figured out that Suri Cruise is five. BE CONFUSED IT IS ALL I AM PROGRAMMED TO DO BE CONFUSED
posted by cmoj at 12:42 PM on August 12, 2011

For those confused, this little girl is Suri Cruise.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 12:44 PM on August 12, 2011

Anyone can buy good taste. I prefer when people dress badly in a really marvelous way, like that . Send me to a website celebrating that kid from a few years ago who dressed in top hats and pink shirts and whatnot, instead of mocking it like some fifth-rate Richard Blackwell, and I will love you forever.
posted by Bunny Ultramod at 12:44 PM on August 12, 2011

"Please state the nature of the fashion emergency".
posted by clavdivs at 12:44 PM on August 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

I find this in poor taste and of questionable ethics. I suppose the author never got teased as a child for things beyond their control?
posted by Soliloquy at 12:47 PM on August 12, 2011

Listen up people. It's mocking the parents, not the kids.

And it's hilarious.
posted by oddman at 12:48 PM on August 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

OK, I was prepared to hate it, but because it's not written in fake kid-speak, I found it more amusing. And I liked this one:

I don’t understand why Kourtney Kardashian will give Mason fringe moccasins, but won’t introduce him to eyebrow wax and smiling.

Come on, he's a scowling little kid with impressively bushy eyebrows! What's not to like?
posted by filthy light thief at 12:48 PM on August 12, 2011

Thing is, this doesn't even rag on Suri. It's a fictionalized insult grab bag in her "voice." So, no, this is not as horrible as the reflexive not-gonna-even-click-on-the-link outrage is dying for it to be.
posted by blucevalo at 12:51 PM on August 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

I thought it was pretty funny but then I am sorta buzzed.
posted by BeerFilter at 12:51 PM on August 12, 2011 [3 favorites]