The Most Interesting Man In The World… Is Russian
September 13, 2011 11:23 AM   Subscribe

He rides with biker gangs! He shoots whales with a crossbow! He does piano recitals for charity! He bends frying pans with his bare hands! It's Vladimir Putin, Action Man.

Video of the whale shooting (tagging, for science!) and some background. Via.
posted by Bora Horza Gobuchul (92 comments total) 21 users marked this as a favorite

 
Together, they fight crime roll back freedoms!
posted by The Tensor at 11:26 AM on September 13, 2011 [4 favorites]


Obligatory animated GIF
posted by exogenous at 11:27 AM on September 13, 2011 [21 favorites]


also let us not forget the magnificent Vladimir Putin Action Comics.
posted by elizardbits at 11:27 AM on September 13, 2011 [4 favorites]


From the "some background" link:

Putin...began by warning that "bears should be afraid of people."

OK, the Yakov Smirnoff meme has now officially gone too far.
posted by PlusDistance at 11:30 AM on September 13, 2011 [10 favorites]


It's really too bad the guy is such a creepy power-hungry authoritarian, because AWESOME photos.
posted by Hoopo at 11:32 AM on September 13, 2011 [10 favorites]


Yeah, I would totally make out with him. I suspect this is a shameful admission but I'm just not feeling it.
posted by elizardbits at 11:36 AM on September 13, 2011 [4 favorites]


I want a man like Putin.
posted by Lutoslawski at 11:36 AM on September 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


Eh, they have Putin, we have Brian Blessed. We win.
posted by darkstar at 11:36 AM on September 13, 2011 [9 favorites]


Talk about burying the lede: Yana Lapikova, a new personal photographer of Prime Minister Vladimir Putin, taking pictures during an official event in Moscow...

I bet I could appear to be judo fighting a bear nude in a snowstorm too, if I had a "personal photographer".
posted by DU at 11:37 AM on September 13, 2011 [6 favorites]


The only reason I'd ever want to be President is for all the opportunities for button-pressing and playing with toys. All those photo ops in factories? I'd be all over that. I don't understand why our elected leaders aren't more excited about solar panel factories or waste treatment systems. Also, tanks.
posted by backseatpilot at 11:40 AM on September 13, 2011 [9 favorites]


He lifts ancient amphorae by the handles. Philistine.
posted by Capt. Renault at 11:42 AM on September 13, 2011 [4 favorites]


Also, tanks.

Here's why
posted by Hoopo at 11:42 AM on September 13, 2011


I bet I could appear to be judo fighting a bear nude in a snowstorm too, if I had a "personal photographer".

OK, Metafilter 2011 t-shirt design: ACHIEVED!
posted by GenjiandProust at 11:43 AM on September 13, 2011


I like the one where he attempts to crush a frying pan with his bare hands. The dude was in the KGB. Maybe Obama can learn a thing or two, make republicans physically afraid, you know nobody would have the balls to call Putin a traitor, the dude shot a siberian tiger to "save" a TV crew, now that is stagecraft.
posted by Ad hominem at 11:44 AM on September 13, 2011 [3 favorites]


Still superb pictures... although I feel like i'm watching a James Bond movie
posted by TolkienLibrary at 11:44 AM on September 13, 2011 [5 favorites]


I don't understand why our elected leaders aren't more excited about solar panel factories or waste treatment systems

Because, then all you end up doing is looking at stuff indoors, where it is apparently way too bright.
posted by obscurator at 11:46 AM on September 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


Also, tanks.

Here's why

He just looks dumb because of the helmet, people who wear helmets are wimps. Obama should do that shirtless, smeared with oil and dirt like he just got back from the shit, maybe a red headband ala Rambo.
posted by Ad hominem at 11:46 AM on September 13, 2011 [5 favorites]


The dude was in the KGB. Maybe Obama can learn a thing or two, make republicans physically afraid

George H. W. Bush was Director of the CIA. It didn't win him a second term.
posted by The World Famous at 11:47 AM on September 13, 2011


These are so totally over the top...but so awesome. You have to envy Putin the lifestyle and imagery he has crafted. It sure looks like he is having a hell of a lot of fun.
posted by Xoebe at 11:47 AM on September 13, 2011


also let us not forget the magnificent Vladimir Putin Action Comics.

I honestly expected the FPP to be about the comics until I clicked the first link.

Also: his motorcycle as three wheels. That is not sufficiently bad ass.
posted by asnider at 11:48 AM on September 13, 2011


See also Putin with guns and Putin vs. U.S. presidents.
posted by jeffburdges at 11:48 AM on September 13, 2011


Obama should do that shirtless, smeared with oil and dirt like he just got back from the shit, maybe a red headband ala Rambo.

Vote Barrack Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Obama
posted by Hoopo at 11:48 AM on September 13, 2011 [6 favorites]


Yeah, I would totally make out with him.*snip*

Today's paper had some thing about Medvedev keeping mum about running against the man
posted by infini at 11:48 AM on September 13, 2011


DU: Talk about burying the lede: Yana Lapikova, a new personal photographer of Prime Minister Vladimir Putin, taking pictures during an official event in Moscow...

"She is really a good photographer, and her modelling past is of no interest to us whatsoever because it's not a crime," Peskov was quoted as saying by RIA-Novosti. (Warning: some potentially NSFW pics of Lapikova in this gallery)

Yes, attractive young ladies are totally uninteresting unless they were involved in criminal activities. My thoughts exactly.
posted by filthy light thief at 11:49 AM on September 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


Also: his motorcycle as three wheels. That is not sufficiently bad ass.

agreed, that one actually makes him look like kind of a wimp - clearly not the effect he was going for.
posted by Mars Saxman at 11:49 AM on September 13, 2011


That's not a man. That's a supervillan.
posted by blue_beetle at 11:49 AM on September 13, 2011 [3 favorites]


Really - dude rides a tricycle.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 11:50 AM on September 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Also: his motorcycle as three wheels. That is not sufficiently bad ass.

You need three wheels to be able to mount your nuke back there, the guy is Raven from Snowcrash
posted by Ad hominem at 11:51 AM on September 13, 2011 [9 favorites]


Bora Horza Gobuchul: "He rides with biker gangs! He shoots whales with a crossbow! He does piano recitals for charity! He bends frying pans with his bare hands!"

He kisses little boys on the stomach! Wait, what?
posted by brundlefly at 11:51 AM on September 13, 2011


I'm expecting Daniel Craig to play the titular role when Hollywood makes a Putin biopic.
posted by Kabanos at 11:51 AM on September 13, 2011 [8 favorites]


Eh, they have Putin, we have Brian Blessed. We win.

Only if you let him run the country.
posted by AdamCSnider at 11:54 AM on September 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


AS a friend said to me today at lunch about Putin:
He has brought back the days of the czars.
posted by Postroad at 11:56 AM on September 13, 2011


why is putin a crab
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 11:56 AM on September 13, 2011


So you're his "personal photographer," eh?
posted by maxwelton at 11:57 AM on September 13, 2011


aka the communications intern
posted by infini at 11:58 AM on September 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Putin had the decency to respect the term limits at least. But he should not remain prime minister indefinitely if he cares about Russia's stability after his death. It'll be better for Russia if he retires from politics after a reasonable length career. And simply advises subsequent politicians.
posted by jeffburdges at 12:00 PM on September 13, 2011


I bet I could appear to be judo fighting a bear nude in a snowstorm too, if I had a "personal photographer".

...What? Okay, so you're jealous he has his own press person, but you do realize that you would actually need to judo fight a bear nude in a snowstorm in order to make that photo happen, right?

Or are you implying she is cleverly photoshopping him into all of these activities?
posted by cavalier at 12:05 PM on September 13, 2011


I'm just saying, if he needs a Western woman to be his concubine to umm... show the union between Russian and America... I volunteer.
posted by chatongriffes at 12:06 PM on September 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


29, he is not wearing a tanker's outfit, he's slipping.
posted by Meatbomb at 12:06 PM on September 13, 2011


OK, the Yakov Smirnoff meme has now officially gone too far.

In post-Soviet Russia, horse whispers you.
posted by EvaDestruction at 12:06 PM on September 13, 2011 [6 favorites]


Eh, they have Putin, we have Brian Blessed. We win.

Only if you let him run the country.




Response.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 12:07 PM on September 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


He looks so cool when he's having journalists assassinated. It's pretty badass. I love his casual attitude towards murder. And style too! He put polonium on the map. Such an awesomely cool guy.
posted by Edogy at 12:08 PM on September 13, 2011 [7 favorites]


I like the one where he attempts to crush a frying pan with his bare hands. The dude was in the KGB. Maybe Obama can learn a thing or two, make republicans physically afraid, you know nobody would have the balls to call Putin a traitor, the dude shot a siberian tiger to "save" a TV crew, now that is stagecraft.

This would definitely be a step forward for the USA, for sure, without a doubt. NOT
posted by Ironmouth at 12:08 PM on September 13, 2011


Putin and Obama at the UN.
posted by Ad hominem at 12:10 PM on September 13, 2011 [17 favorites]


NOT

Borat's from Kazakhstan, not Russia.
posted by kmz at 12:12 PM on September 13, 2011


Such an awesomely cool guy.

Do you really think that's what's happening here?
posted by Hoopo at 12:12 PM on September 13, 2011


Imagine actually arm wrestling the President of the United States.

Imagine beating the POTUS at arm wrestling.

Imagine being taken to the ground and beaten by the Secret Service after beating the POTUS at arm wrestling.

What a country, indeed.
posted by tommasz at 12:14 PM on September 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


This is just demanding a photoshop contest, is it not?
posted by leapfrog at 12:16 PM on September 13, 2011 [2 favorites]




I don't understand why our elected leaders aren't more excited about solar panel factories

Because it don't look so good when the factory goes belly up about 16 months after the visit.
posted by ambient2 at 12:17 PM on September 13, 2011


Don't laugh. Those poses could get him the GOP nomination.
posted by Vibrissae at 12:18 PM on September 13, 2011


Waiting for the inevitable " leaked" sex tape..
posted by The Whelk at 12:21 PM on September 13, 2011


But he should not remain prime minister indefinitely if he cares about Russia's stability after his death.

I'm not sure Putin understands the concept of Russia continuing to exist after his death. Actually, I'm not sure he understands the concept of his own mortality.
posted by Navelgazer at 12:23 PM on September 13, 2011


Jeez I want to be PM of Russia.
posted by Mister_A at 12:24 PM on September 13, 2011


He doesn't hold a candle to Alabama Man.
posted by dhdrum at 12:28 PM on September 13, 2011


ambient2: "I don't understand why our elected leaders aren't more excited about solar panel factories

Because it don't look so good when the factory goes belly up about 16 months after the visit.
"

I understand. I went to this restaurant once and it went out of business a year and a half later. Totally my fault.
posted by Splunge at 12:33 PM on September 13, 2011


Putin has decided the Presidential election (back in 2006)
posted by vidur at 12:37 PM on September 13, 2011


Wait a minute, this is crazy but.. Bear Grylls for president? Damnit , presidents have to be "natural born" citizens, what a stupid law.
posted by Ad hominem at 12:41 PM on September 13, 2011


The only reason I'd ever want to be President is for all the opportunities for button-pressing and playing with toys. All those photo ops in factories? I'd be all over that. I don't understand why our elected leaders aren't more excited about solar panel factories or waste treatment systems. Also, tanks.

I want to be vice-President for much the same reason. I mean, your basic job is to open factories and go on tours.
Sure, you occasionally have to say things that the President doesn't want to, but you get to live in a nicer house than the President, you get your own plane (sure, it's no 747, but still) and they pay you $200k a year.
posted by madajb at 12:47 PM on September 13, 2011


Wait a minute, this is crazy but.. Bear Grylls for president? Damnit , presidents have to be "natural born" citizens, what a stupid law.

And it's usually best if they don't star in an Internet meme about drinking their own piss.
posted by tommasz at 12:52 PM on September 13, 2011


And it's usually best if they don't star in an Internet meme about drinking their own piss.

I have it on good authority Obama drinks his own piss, it is 90% democrat tears.

don't tell anyone, but Bear Grylls is answering questions on reddit right now.
posted by Ad hominem at 12:58 PM on September 13, 2011 [3 favorites]


Gosh, it sure takes a lot of butch photo-ops to get people to forget about that time you compulsively kissed a random boy on the stomach.
posted by Sys Rq at 12:59 PM on September 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Or killing small, inoffensive furry creatures for no reason.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 12:59 PM on September 13, 2011


That was for Bear Grylls.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 1:00 PM on September 13, 2011


But he should not remain prime minister indefinitely if he cares about Russia's stability after his death.

Meh. The office didn't exist until Putin invented it and hired himself, so why should it exist after?
posted by Sys Rq at 1:01 PM on September 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


This is just demanding a photoshop contest, is it not?

I hope nobody 'shops Putin onto the roof of the WTC. No telling what sort of crazy would be unleashed.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 1:01 PM on September 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


It's especially hilarious because it's all: outdoors, bad-ass, bikers, bad-ass, bear!, tank, submarine, Bond villain, PUPPY, bad-ass.
posted by grapesaresour at 1:02 PM on September 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Really, I just want to see him riding on top of that bear in photo #18. And maybe put Kongar-ol Ondar next to him in some of those Tuva shots.
posted by leapfrog at 1:07 PM on September 13, 2011


And it's usually best if they don't star in an Internet meme about drinking their own piss.

Then there was this Prime Minister who beat out Indira Gandhi herself...
posted by infini at 1:23 PM on September 13, 2011


> I'm expecting Daniel Craig to play the titular role when Hollywood makes a Putin biopic.

Too tall. Think Phil Collins.
posted by circular at 1:24 PM on September 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


My favourite comment on Putin comes from louchely nihilist gourmand Who is Ioz:

Imagine if you are Vladimir Putin. You do not drink or smoke, and aside from occasionally fucking your gymnast nymphette into catatonic submission while a 10,000 piece orchestra plays Gimn Sovetskogo Soyuza outside your window, you do not carouse. Your life is occupied with grim, atavistic fantasies, which are just now coming to fruition, and as you nurse your bloody dreams in the Siberian expanses of your glittering, Satanic soul, you flip on the teevee and see the only force on earth with any capacity to foil or retard your ambitions rapidly consuming itself in an orgy of abject ridiculousness, a Marx-brothers comedy of political ineptitude so baroque in its Vaudevillian slapstick that it melts, for just one moment, the crimson popsicle that is your KGB heart and from your mouth, for the first time since you traded your soul for life eternal and a thirst for blood one thousand years ago, you let out one brief, delicious: Ha!

posted by Sebmojo at 2:20 PM on September 13, 2011 [10 favorites]


Move over Chuck Norris.
posted by homeless Visigoth at 2:47 PM on September 13, 2011


Move over Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't move over for Putin. Putin just slides the tectonic plates around and Chuck Norris is never the wiser.
posted by The World Famous at 3:18 PM on September 13, 2011 [4 favorites]


Well, you all can think whatever you like, but this sure beats clearing brush or chomping on crappy junk food.
posted by c13 at 4:08 PM on September 13, 2011


Well, you all can think whatever you like, but this sure beats clearing brush or chomping on crappy junk food.

Yes, Russia's head of state has more impressive personal ego-elevating propaganda than the former President of the United States. I don't think that's in dispute.
posted by The World Famous at 4:22 PM on September 13, 2011


Former? What, the current one is any different?
posted by c13 at 4:29 PM on September 13, 2011


Teddy Roosavelt could beat him, if Cracked is a valid historical source.
Anyone written about the whole 'badass' meme and what it means?
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 4:39 PM on September 13, 2011


Yes, Russia's head of state has more impressive personal ego-elevating propaganda than the former President of the United States

Also he didn't get beat up by a pretzel. I dunno if your ego really ever recovers after something like that; subsequent bad-ass propaganda would just seem too obviously accommodating for your shortcomings.
posted by Hoopo at 5:00 PM on September 13, 2011


Related, the Economist has a terribly depressing piece about the malaise of modern Russia.
posted by Nelson at 5:11 PM on September 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Former? What, the current one is any different?

The personal ego-elevating propaganda of the current President of the United States is somewhat more effective than that of his predecessor, yes.

Also he didn't get beat up by a pretzel. I dunno if your ego really ever recovers after something like that; subsequent bad-ass propaganda would just seem too obviously accommodating for your shortcomings.

Having once choked on food is a "shortcoming?" I hate Bush as much as the next guy, but come on. I once choked on sushi and thought I was going to die in front of my co-workers right there at lunch. But somehow my fragile ego eventually recovered. Of course, I do joust narwhals on my jet ski, so I'm quite a badass.
posted by The World Famous at 5:23 PM on September 13, 2011


it was a joke, note I said "got beat up by" and not choked. On account of his face looked like he got in a fight. Bush has far, far more obvious shortcomings.
posted by Hoopo at 5:31 PM on September 13, 2011


The personal ego-elevating propaganda of the current President of the United States is somewhat more effective than that of his predecessor, yes.

I don't know... google images don't really bring up anything other than him either staring off into the distqnce thoughtfully or blathering into a microphone.
posted by c13 at 5:34 PM on September 13, 2011


I don't know... google images don't really bring up anything other than him either staring off into the distqnce thoughtfully or blathering into a microphone.

Try googling "Obama Nobel"
posted by The World Famous at 5:36 PM on September 13, 2011


Anyone written about the whole 'badass' meme and what it means?
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 4:39 PM on September 13 [+] [!]


Badass of the Week is a regularly hilarious interrogation of badassitude.

Though I mainly love it because at my suggestion he started doing the Maori - who were nothing if not badass:

When Captain Cook first landed on the islands of New Zealand in the 1769, one thing immediately became apparent to him – the Maori people are fucking stone-cold hardcore. Part of this sudden realization concerning the undeniable badass credibility of the indigenous Polynesian peoples of this island probably stem from the fact that one of Cook's first encounters with the Maori happened when a pimped-out war canoe (I love the idea of "war canoes" by the way) rolled up alongside Cook's ship and a couple of skull-crushing tribesmen with gnarly full-face tattoos stood up in their ship and held up a set of perfectly-preserved severed heads they had recently detached from the torsos of a band of almost-equally-hardcore warriors.
posted by Sebmojo at 5:56 PM on September 13, 2011


Yeah, he looks happier in those fotos... Got himself a big round shiny thing.
I just think that one of the functions of a leader is to be a symbol. And it looks like we're coming up on the time when we're gonna need more substantial symbols.
posted by c13 at 5:57 PM on September 13, 2011



Anyone written about the whole 'badass' meme and what it means?
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 4:39 PM on September 13 [+] [!]

Badass of the Week is a regularly hilarious interrogation of badassitude.


Nah I'm talking about an interrogation of why Badass of the Week and the Cracked badass lists (some written by the Badass of the Week guy) are so popular on the Internet. is it because they're models of masculinity for wimpy boys? Or is it just 'cause that writer is awesome?
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 6:04 PM on September 13, 2011


Having once choked on food is a "shortcoming?"

Have you seen a pretzel? How does a person choke on a pretzel? It's got three air holes!
posted by Sys Rq at 11:30 PM on September 13, 2011


Are we talking those crispy ones in packets or the big New York style ones? Because I think I've almost choked on a New York pretzel. Or possibly my own bile.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 12:28 AM on September 14, 2011


Have you seen a pretzel? How does a person choke on a pretzel? It's got three air holes!

Are you being serious?
posted by The World Famous at 9:56 AM on September 14, 2011


Picture 34
Pure. Bond. Villain.

_This_ is what i was talking about when I said (when he was announced) that Craig looks more like the lead henchman than the villain.
posted by djrock3k at 10:23 AM on September 14, 2011 [1 favorite]


I never thought I'd hear myself say this about Vladimir Putin but yup, pretty sure I'd hit it now. Especially after picture #34 and the one with him hugging a puppy. I MEAN COME ON!

Also:

a. he has a tiger
b. he's helped save tigers and
c. he's saved people FROM tigers.

Totally badass. And also I love tigers, a lot.
posted by bitter-girl.com at 11:03 AM on September 14, 2011


d. He's a corrupt fascist despot
posted by Sys Rq at 1:27 PM on September 14, 2011 [3 favorites]


I never thought I'd hear myself say this about Vladimir Putin but yup, pretty sure I'd hit it now.

Totally badass. And also I love tigers, a lot.

Not that I want to distract your gaze from Putin or anything. But there's this super hot guy named Arkan that you should check out. Sure, he's dead and a complete villain. But if you're into Putin and you love tigers, Arkan's your man.
posted by The World Famous at 1:53 PM on September 14, 2011


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