NSFW Rugby - Naked New Zealand Fellows

September 14, 2011 10:41 AM

NSFW Rugby - Naked New Zealand Fellows (Action Shot Slideshow from Norway's largest newspaper)

The visiting women's team (with one guy) took off one item of clothing each time they scored (then put it back on).

Official Site of the All Blacks Team

Some details from the Wiki page:

The New Zealand men's national rugby union team, often called the All Blacks, represent New Zealand in international rugby union competitions. Rugby union is regarded as New Zealand's national sport. Winners of the inaugural Rugby World Cup, New Zealand are the leading points scorers of all time and the only international rugby team with a winning record against every test nation they have ever played.

Previously and also previously.

(Apologies to sports enthusiasts if I haven't covered the finer sporting points. I don't know anything about rugby. Mostly I wanted to post the naked fellows.)

posted by Glinn (73 comments total)

not a single cock in any of those pictures, photo editor must've been busy
posted by nathancaswell at 10:43 AM on September 14, 2011

WHOOPS just got to the last one
posted by nathancaswell at 10:43 AM on September 14, 2011

er, wrapped around to the first one. well this thread has gone smashingly for me thus far
posted by nathancaswell at 10:44 AM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

This Internet's a thing. Previously you had to pick the wrong pub of a Saturday night to see a load of unwanted rugby player arse.
posted by Abiezer at 10:45 AM on September 14, 2011 [8 favorites]

Coed naked rugby (rough, tough and in the buff) is real?

Are all the novelty T-shirts from high school real? Randy Johnson's Casino (liquor in the front, poker in the rear)?

My mind is blown.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 10:46 AM on September 14, 2011 [3 favorites]

The video with the dangling bits actually dangling (NSFW).
posted by elgilito at 10:46 AM on September 14, 2011

Good one! I should have checked for video.
posted by Glinn at 10:48 AM on September 14, 2011

Now that's a time to shoot with the Phantom camera if there ever was one.
posted by nathancaswell at 10:49 AM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

Why?

And that doesn't look like the All Blacks team btw
posted by infini at 10:50 AM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

Must have been cold.
posted by govtdrone at 10:51 AM on September 14, 2011

To see the cocks flailing around like rubbery maces and the tortured grimaces of the tacklers in glorious slow motion, obviously.
posted by nathancaswell at 10:52 AM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

Oh how did you know my birthday was coming up?
posted by The Whelk at 10:53 AM on September 14, 2011 [5 favorites]

Ow ow ow ow ow. Ow. Ow. Ow ow ow oh jesus ow. Ow.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 10:54 AM on September 14, 2011 [3 favorites]

And that doesn't look like the All Blacks team btw

Oh! I think you are totally right. It is in fact the "Nude Blacks" and I have poor reading comprehension. Whoops!
posted by Glinn at 10:56 AM on September 14, 2011 [1 favorite]

Love the naked haka.
posted by Nathanial Hörnblowér at 10:58 AM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

Ew. Ew ew ew. Ew! Ew ew ew oh jesus ew. Ew.
posted by mazola at 10:59 AM on September 14, 2011

So, all the naked dudes have a temp tattoo on their asses for some New Zealand flight aggregator. This kind of seems like naked viral advertising. Also, that one guy has more foreskin than shaft.
posted by Horselover Phattie at 11:00 AM on September 14, 2011 [1 favorite]

grabaseat.co.nz....

somehow the most clever combination of URL marketing and URL placement ever.
posted by hippybear at 11:03 AM on September 14, 2011 [1 favorite]

That's pretty funny.
posted by delmoi at 11:03 AM on September 14, 2011

MetaFilter: Mostly I wanted to post the naked fellows
posted by hippybear at 11:04 AM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

Also, that one guy has more foreskin than shaft.

But its out here for all to see. He has even more balls than foreskin.
posted by CautionToTheWind at 11:06 AM on September 14, 2011 [5 favorites]

> But its out here for all to see posted by CautionToTheWind

Eponyyouknowhat
posted by Horselover Phattie at 11:08 AM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

Rugby union is regarded as New Zealand's national sport religion.

FTFY.
posted by hal_c_on at 11:11 AM on September 14, 2011 [1 favorite]

Apologies to sports enthusiasts if I haven't covered the finer sporting points.

Why bother? They didn't.
posted by nathancaswell at 11:12 AM on September 14, 2011 [7 favorites]

Something something too many balls on the field...
posted by orme at 11:14 AM on September 14, 2011

somehow the most clever combination of URL marketing and URL placement ever.

I'm at work so I can't actually see what y'all are talking about, but this talk of advertising is reminding me of a bit from the most recent QI episode. They were talking about how studies of human gaze have shown that women tend to look at people's faces when they first meet them. Men on the other hand, look at their face and their genitals (and it doesn't matter what orientation you are or what gender the other person is).

Anyway, one of the panelists joked that that means marketers should start putting advertising on people's crotches. Looks like somebody took that to heart! (Or other body parts, rather.)
posted by kmz at 11:26 AM on September 14, 2011

I think the world needs more nudity and this whole situation is fabulous, but it's still lost on me why they were playing in the nude... Is this just a group of nudist men who like to play rugby? Are they trying to raise money/awareness about something? Just having a laugh? Could someone please explain the context here, as I can't read Norwegian.
posted by PigAlien at 11:30 AM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

It's all quite silly and non-sexual.
posted by frecklefaerie at 11:32 AM on September 14, 2011

I support nudity in all circumstances and for any reason whatsoever.
posted by Avenger at 11:35 AM on September 14, 2011 [3 favorites]

Shirts and skins.
posted by Capt. Renault at 11:35 AM on September 14, 2011 [3 favorites]

Could someone please explain the context here, as I can't read Norwegian.

Should be a link at the top of the page to translate it. Does a pretty good job. (Or maybe that's a Chrome thing?)
posted by Glinn at 11:41 AM on September 14, 2011

I'm suddenly interested in rugby for some reason.
posted by theredpen at 11:47 AM on September 14, 2011 [3 favorites]

Some of those men were quite lovely in the alltogether. I wonder if we could convince the soccer players to do it? But please god, never the American footballers.
posted by dejah420 at 11:50 AM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

Isn't the clothing useful for absorbing the blood?

Tangential: A car that parks in my lot has this bumpersticker: Yes mom, I still play rugby!
posted by tommasz at 11:58 AM on September 14, 2011

weenors in their natural relaxed state are goofy-looking.

there, i said it.
posted by elizardbits at 12:28 PM on September 14, 2011 [5 favorites]

It appears to be taken from (and links to) an Otago Daily Times article, which is in English (but, being puritan Dunedin, lacks pictures).

Interestingly (or not) grabaseat.co.nz is a cheap flights website run by Air New Zealand, who also sponsor the All Blacks.
posted by Infinite Jest at 12:30 PM on September 14, 2011

Come now, the placement of the ads and their messaging is assolutely perfect

"Grab a seat" stenciled on a naked male ass.
posted by infini at 12:40 PM on September 14, 2011

> weenors

If you're going to spell it like that you should go the full monty and spell it "weenorz".
posted by Horselover Phattie at 12:40 PM on September 14, 2011

Why aren't the women naked?
posted by New England Cultist at 12:41 PM on September 14, 2011 [4 favorites]

Get out of my dreams, GET OUT OF MY DREAMS!
posted by ZaneJ. at 12:44 PM on September 14, 2011

I believe the universally accepted spelling is actually "ween0rz". How gauche of me.
posted by elizardbits at 1:00 PM on September 14, 2011

w33n0rz
posted by hippybear at 1:07 PM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

I wonder if members of the guys team got together with the women's team afterwards... Quite the round of foreplay (for those that are into that sort of thing).
posted by KokuRyu at 1:11 PM on September 14, 2011

\^/33n0rz
posted by oddman at 1:16 PM on September 14, 2011 [1 favorite]

weenors in their natural relaxed state are goofy-looking.

Someone who thinks penises are goofy? If I didn't know better, I'd swear you were my wife's sock puppet. Thankfully, she's also afraid of testicles, so I have the upper hand.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 1:31 PM on September 14, 2011

goddamnit I have several more hours before I'm home

<3 rugby players
posted by desjardins at 1:34 PM on September 14, 2011

It's a bit sad that they can do something wild like playing rugby in the nude, but they still can't break their obligation to serve as walking billboards.
posted by Joe in Australia at 2:18 PM on September 14, 2011

Why aren't the women naked?

So that you could check out their polka-dotted pink boxer shorts, which are adorable.
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:27 PM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

> they can do something wild like playing rugby in the nude, but they still can't break their obligation to serve as walking billboards.

The latter the reason for the former, of course.
posted by Horselover Phattie at 2:28 PM on September 14, 2011

This happens annually in Dunedin since 2002, home of Otago University (NZ's oldest) and the teams largely comprise students of both sexes. Games are usually played in July / August in the middle of winter (Dunedin is very south which in the southern hemisphere = cold).

They've played some extra games this year in honour of Rugby World Cup 2011 being held in NZ (100K+ visitors for 6 weeks of rugger); they also played Fiji and the Welsh Willies back in July.

Games usually get news coverage as the traditional "wacky last item on the bulletin".
posted by John Shaft at 2:45 PM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

Oh, what I wouldn't give to not be one of the women playing in this game!
posted by mrnutty at 4:35 PM on September 14, 2011

I like my naked ruggers like I like my kissing.

French and done by professionals

(Only done for the joke; I'm truly pro male nudity on just about every non-familial occasion. And rugby must have the highest nudity of any sport whose uniform is not a Speedo)
posted by MCMikeNamara at 4:35 PM on September 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

The All Cracks
posted by the noob at 5:08 PM on September 14, 2011 [1 favorite]

Awkward.
posted by homunculus at 5:15 PM on September 14, 2011

Holy fuck. I cannot stop laughing.

That is so incredibly incredibly wrong, and potentially painful on so many levels...
posted by Skygazer at 5:25 PM on September 14, 2011

Never have so many shwangs pointed in so many hysterical directions...
posted by Skygazer at 5:31 PM on September 14, 2011

Awkward.

I love how all the important bits (her face, his genitals) are hidden by legs and rugby balls, making it look like a staged soft-core photograph.
posted by hippybear at 5:31 PM on September 14, 2011

Never have so many shwangs pointed in so many hysterical directions...

Oh, I dunno. Attend a night at a gay bar where going commando is the norm...

You'd just never know it was happening.
posted by hippybear at 5:32 PM on September 14, 2011

This happens annually in Dunedin since 2002, home of Otago University (NZ's oldest) and the teams largely comprise students of both sexes.

they also played Fiji and the Welsh Willies back in July.

Here are videos from the Fiji game: VIDEO: Nude Rugby – naked haka (contains nudity)

Nude Rugby – Rachel Scott post-match IV (contains nudity)
posted by homunculus at 5:53 PM on September 14, 2011

Would this sort of post be okay if it was aobut women?
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 6:44 PM on September 14, 2011

Did anybody just see an elephant come streaking through here?
posted by Dano St at 6:52 PM on September 14, 2011 [1 favorite]

Now if only they would photoshop out those women who are ruining the photos



:-P
posted by 1000monkeys at 6:59 PM on September 14, 2011

Would this sort of post be okay if it was aobut women?
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn

Sure, I don't see why it wouldn't. As long as they were aware/consenting to the nudity and the photographs, and the comments didn't set off the creepo meter too much.

Also, people making "it must be cold" etc. jokes: um...things can shrink a lot when you're running and exercising. Google it if you must lol.
posted by 1000monkeys at 7:01 PM on September 14, 2011

In my opinion the ancient greeks totally had the right idea and in an ideal world all sports would be played in the nude. I watch sports to see athletes do things with their bodies! When you put clothing and padding and helmets between the athletes and people's eyeballs, you're blocking people's view.
posted by Praxis at 7:36 PM on September 14, 2011

In my opinion the ancient greeks totally had the right idea and in an ideal world all sports would be played in the nude. I watch sports to see athletes do things with their bodies! When you put clothing and padding and helmets between the athletes and people's eyeballs, you're blocking people's view.

I want the reverse. I want steroid addled, cyborged, posthuman athletes. Runners with bionic limbs. Sharpshooters with telescoping eyes. Rocket skates! Etc.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 7:38 PM on September 14, 2011 [3 favorites]

Look at all those beautiful foreskins. :)
posted by Malice at 9:17 PM on September 14, 2011

I do not remember that we played the game this way. Which means we probably did.



Dammit...
posted by kjs3 at 11:54 PM on September 14, 2011

Also, people making "it must be cold" etc. jokes: um...things can shrink a lot when you're running and exercising. Google it if you must lol.
posted by 1000monkeys at 7:01 PM on September 14 [+] [!]

Well, if this is in Dunedin it probably is pretty cold - I've never been there or anywhere in NZ, but I hear it's not uncommon for unwanted lounges to be pulled to the ground and set on fire to keep the fans warm.

I wonder if members of the guys team got together with the women's team afterwards... Quite the round of foreplay (for those that are into that sort of thing).
posted by KokuRyu at 1:11 PM on September 14 [+] [!]

Looking at the photos it seems the members of the guys team were getting together with the women's team already, in some cases painfully, so catching up later would probably be redundant.

(Wasn't there also a 'nude' All Blacks ad for Air NZ a while ago?)
posted by Hello, I'm David McGahan at 12:21 AM on September 15, 2011

NSFW

Stade du France has some real nice players

NSFW
posted by kudzu at 4:02 AM on September 15, 2011 [1 favorite]

Whoa, kudzu. That's rather nice.
posted by Glinn at 6:33 AM on September 15, 2011

"Would this sort of post be okay if it was about women?"

It would certainly be less likely to be OK. I'll chalk it up to male privilege.
posted by oddman at 7:19 AM on September 15, 2011

"Would this sort of post be okay if it was about women?"

It would certainly be less likely to be OK. I'll chalk it up to male privilege.

This is really funny (odd tbh) but the Oct issue of some magazine of mom's arrived and its the Singaporean edition (a nation well known for banning Cosmopolitan from its shores for eg) and it had a very broad shouldered naked man in an ad. His top half mind you, and the headline was something about "Our robust strength is just for you" - I had to read the fine print to figure out what the ad was for... coffee beans.
posted by infini at 10:57 AM on September 15, 2011

"Would this sort of post be okay if it was about women?"

It actually is about woman. I don't know if everyone/you noticed but this was a game against a visiting side of woman from Spain?

The whole event is light hearted fun. Most people here seem to understand that. Though: Oi, Glinn! This has absolutely nothing to do with the All Blacks. It costs a lot more to get them naked.

Great game against Japan yesterday. Really fun Rugby to watch.

But more on topic: All Blacks, totally the best looking rugby side in the world, and not bad at the game either.
posted by aychedee at 12:11 AM on September 17, 2011