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October 22, 2011 12:32 PM   Subscribe

Gory images of Gaddafi. Exotic pets being slaughtered. The EU on the verge of a financial meltdown... Your 90-second mental health break, courtesy of Lynda Carter.
posted by wensink (90 comments total) 37 users marked this as a favorite

 
Needs to be GIFed, so hard.
posted by hermitosis at 12:35 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


I liked it. As a Middle East Studies major in Central Ohio, I've been bombarded with two of the stories mentioned above nonstop. And I love Wonder Woman.

Haters gonna hate.
posted by HopperFan at 12:44 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


Today I learned that the heels on Wonder Woman's boots can retract into flat-soled boots at will, her hair blows into the wind and she looks like a dude in a body stocking when riding a skateboard.
posted by loquacious at 12:45 PM on October 22, 2011 [7 favorites]


What does Wonder Woman need a helmet for? And doesn't she have a jet? And I don't know what these guys did, but you'd think they deserved more punishment that just getting pushed over.

Totally fake.
posted by cmoj at 12:49 PM on October 22, 2011 [12 favorites]


I spent far too much of my wayward youth spinning around in the backyard, emulating Ms Prince, which irritated my father almost as much as my identifying with Charity Hope Valentine and wanting to be a taxi dancer, but my oh my that Lynda Carter sure struck a terrific figure.

It's hard to believe she once screamed at me to get off her lawn and take my fucking organist with me.

Now I feel all fuzzy and warm.
posted by sonascope at 12:49 PM on October 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


And doesn't she have a jet?

Yes, but it's invisible and easily misplaced.
posted by Knappster at 12:52 PM on October 22, 2011 [7 favorites]


What does Wonder Woman need a helmet for?
It's the law.
posted by Flunkie at 12:52 PM on October 22, 2011 [36 favorites]


I'm confused. Why is Wonder Woman beating up Erik Estrada and John C. Reilly?
posted by Rangeboy at 12:53 PM on October 22, 2011 [5 favorites]


FUCK YES.
posted by everichon at 12:54 PM on October 22, 2011 [4 favorites]


This is one of those threads that I love reading before I click on the links -- little extra dose of surrealness. Don't yell at me -- I'm going to watch it -- I just like reading this stuff having no idea what's going on yet.
posted by theredpen at 12:56 PM on October 22, 2011 [14 favorites]


what
posted by longtime_lurker at 12:58 PM on October 22, 2011


Damn, I KNOW where that was filmed. North edge of the San Fernando Valley (and I mean north of where they shoot all the porn). There's a section of Tampa Avenue (10000+ street address) that goes up a hill (going north, they were downhilling southbound), has a median for no reason and a long wall hiding all the houses in the cul-de-sacs. Amazingly, it looked just as ugly the last time I was there a few years ago. But it was a great place to shoot a sequence like that.
posted by oneswellfoop at 1:00 PM on October 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


Gory images of Gaddafi. Exotic pets being slaughtered. The EU on the verge of a financial meltdown.

I'm confused. Is the link going to show me those things? Because I've been pretty careful to stay away from such stuff.
posted by shelleycat at 1:01 PM on October 22, 2011


And now I'm watching a girl with a bethonged and betattooed behind wash a car. Bet I'm not the only one.
posted by villanelles at dawn at 1:02 PM on October 22, 2011 [20 favorites]


The link is definitely not going to show you those things.
posted by jacquilynne at 1:02 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


It's the law.

Obviously that isn't Newton's Third Law.
posted by charlie don't surf at 1:02 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


Dear Lynda Carter,

Thank you for convincing legions of girls in the mid-1970s to play superhero in their underwear.

Sincerely,

Any Boy Who Went Through Kindergarten in the mid-70s
posted by jonp72 at 1:02 PM on October 22, 2011 [15 favorites]


The woman was multitalented.
posted by pracowity at 1:12 PM on October 22, 2011


Damn, I KNOW where that was filmed.

I tried to place it on Google Maps but can't match up the video with streetview. The video seems to show a one-way street with walls on both sides, but Maps has a 2-lane divided road.
posted by stbalbach at 1:13 PM on October 22, 2011


It looked like a divided road with a median to me... and it has gotten some more developed since that was filmed in 197X...
posted by oneswellfoop at 1:15 PM on October 22, 2011


AND SHE'S GAININ'
posted by mr_crash_davis at 1:15 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


It's hard to believe she once screamed at me to get off her lawn and take my fucking organist with me.

Wait, what? You can't leave us hanging like that!
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 1:15 PM on October 22, 2011 [6 favorites]


Whenever I see Lynda Carter in her Wonder Woman costume, I always wonder if those are her real hips. Wow.
posted by KokuRyu at 1:16 PM on October 22, 2011


Totally fake.

Yeah, in today's totally non-fake world she'd just blow them away with an AK-47 and be done with it.
posted by blucevalo at 1:16 PM on October 22, 2011


Damn, I KNOW where that was filmed. North edge of the San Fernando Valley.

I was thinking Yorba Linda. But now that I think about it I don't think Yorba Linda was yet under development like that at the time this was probably filmed, so far north SFV makes more sense.
posted by loquacious at 1:17 PM on October 22, 2011


@jonp72 And thank Norman Gimbel and Charles Fox, the songwriters responsible for the show's theme.

"Wonder Woman, Wonder Woman.
All the world's waiting for you,
and the power you possess.
In your satin tights,
Fighting for your rights
And the old Red, White and Blue."
posted by wensink at 1:17 PM on October 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


Seriously, in those shoes?
posted by Devils Rancher at 1:21 PM on October 22, 2011


The woman was multitalented.

And now I'm watching Barbara Eden sing "Spinning Wheel." I love this song. Wow.
posted by hydrophonic at 1:28 PM on October 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


oneswellfoop, maybe your right. I'm looking at things that wouldn't have changed. The retaining walls in the video have a steep step-down due to the hill, but as I cruised along the road in Streetview the walls are fairly level along the top. If your right it would be cool to place it on the map with the video, since you've been there and recognize it maybe you can.
posted by stbalbach at 1:32 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


Calling shenanigans.

Okay, I can accept the spin to roller derby queen gear to satisfy the FCC in not encouraging kids to skateboard unsafely.

HOWFREAKINEVER, I want to know how she drained her inertia so damn quickly that after the chase she was having to push herself along.

Or am I just not up on old skateboard wheels or something?
posted by Samizdata at 1:35 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


Anybody wants to start LyndaCarterFilter.com, I'm in for five bucks. Shit, I'm in for fifty.
posted by jbickers at 1:45 PM on October 22, 2011 [7 favorites]


If IMDB is to be believed, Rene Carrasco was the skateboarder. There's a photo of Rene and Lynda Carter here (images take a long time to load on the gallery page)
posted by zippy at 1:53 PM on October 22, 2011 [6 favorites]


My Barbie doll was made to play Wonder Woman, but she wasn't really up to the challenge.
posted by JanetLand at 1:54 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


LUMBER
posted by bicyclefish at 1:55 PM on October 22, 2011 [4 favorites]


Where do all those outfits come from when she spins? Does she drag an invisible wardrobe around with her?
posted by orme at 1:57 PM on October 22, 2011


When the time comes that's how I want to go down.
posted by mazola at 1:57 PM on October 22, 2011 [5 favorites]


I love how she pushes them both at the same time, but they hit the ground in sequence. Obviously WW has some serious physics-defying powers going for her.
posted by Gelatin at 1:59 PM on October 22, 2011 [8 favorites]


When I think of Lynda Carter, I think of how her husband helped fund the Pakistani nuclear proliferation black market by fronting for the largest banking fraud evar.

That and tinsel tits....
posted by warbaby at 2:04 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


Obviously WW has some serious physics-defying powers going for her.

What, the fact she never has to pull up her strapless bustier didn't convince you first? Then there's the fact she can tie knots and work a lasso while wearing satin gloves. I'm pretty sure she's the one who taught Batman how to do that trick despite Robin's objections.
posted by loquacious at 2:05 PM on October 22, 2011 [4 favorites]


Seriously missed opportunity here for her to lasso the car and get dragged behind it water-skiing-style.
posted by straight at 2:05 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


Skateboarding Wonder Woman would make an excellent halloween costume this year
posted by boygeorge at 2:06 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


Skateboarding Wonder Woman is the name of my Aquabats cover band.
posted by FritoKAL at 2:21 PM on October 22, 2011 [5 favorites]


<3 <3, oh the memories of spinning unto sickness, hoping beyond hope that I, too, could transform into a being so filled with wonder! If only I still had a photo of a tiny lil esmerelda_jenkins in her Wonder Woman bathing suit/multi-year halloween costume to share with you! <3 <3
posted by esmerelda_jenkins at 2:30 PM on October 22, 2011 [4 favorites]


The thing that most amazed me about that video is not that she could skateboard so well, but that she has a power-up move specifically for donning the color-coordinated skateboarding protective clothing.
posted by crunchland at 2:35 PM on October 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


What's missing from the bad guys' lines: "Do you think she's using the same hill we're using?"
posted by maudlin at 2:36 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


Where do all those outfits come from when she spins? Does she drag an invisible wardrobe around with her?

Amazonian magic calls them down from Mt. Olympus. Duh.
posted by device55 at 2:53 PM on October 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


Lynda Carter had two enormous talents.

Acting and skateboarding.
posted by tommasz at 2:56 PM on October 22, 2011


I've been playing Morrowind lately and just yesterday discovered that Lynda Carter voiced all the female Nords in the game. When I visit Solstheim tonight I'll see if any of the ladies there have skateboards.
posted by charred husk at 3:05 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


I'm pretty sure those are Kryptonic 70mm wheels and Tracker trucks on that board in that last scene /50-year-old ex-1970s-skateboarder and Lynda Carter admirer
posted by Ron Thanagar at 3:09 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


Seriously missed opportunity here for her to lasso the car and get dragged behind it water-skiing-style.

WW != YT.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 3:11 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


that was perfect in every way. thank you.
posted by facetious at 3:21 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


Why is Wonder Woman beating up Erik Estrada and John C. Reilly?

Oh, they know what they did.
posted by MrBadExample at 3:22 PM on October 22, 2011 [11 favorites]


Thanks, but images of ugly fucking suburbia, cinderblock fences, ugly cars and deserted, treeless sidewalks doesn' do much for my mental health. Sorry...
posted by c13 at 3:26 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


Kick, push. Kick, push.
posted by KingEdRa at 3:27 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


I was disappointed to learn that Lynda Carter of Wonder Woman fame wasn't the person who had been married to Robert Altman.
posted by Sticherbeast at 3:36 PM on October 22, 2011


I could be wrong. In Google Street View, I have trouble placing the precise stretch, but when I drove it in the past, I'd think "I've seen this street in some TV chase scenes..." and that clip just rang my bell.

"images of ugly fucking suburbia, cinderblock fences, ugly cars and deserted, treeless sidewalks doesn't do much for my mental health" Which was something that struck me about that stretch of street - it's even MORE sterile than your usual San Fernando Valley locale. But I'm sure it was easy to close down for filming, and IS more convenient to Warner studios than Yorba Linda.
posted by oneswellfoop at 3:37 PM on October 22, 2011


I love how she pushes them both at the same time, but they hit the ground in sequence.

well obviously one of them is made of metal and the other one is made of feathers.
posted by sexyrobot at 3:38 PM on October 22, 2011 [7 favorites]


Oh and when VCRs became common and we got to fool around with them, rumor was that if you freeze-framed Lynda Carter spinning into her Wonder Woman costume at just the right moment you would see her completely naked.
posted by Ron Thanagar at 3:38 PM on October 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


woulda been awesomer if it was an invisible skateboard
posted by fuzzypantalones at 3:39 PM on October 22, 2011 [6 favorites]


I love how she pushes them both at the same time, but they hit the ground in sequence. Obviously WW has some serious physics-defying powers going for her.

Obviously, since she's got both feet on a skateboard when she shoves those guys, but instead of her rolling backwards, they fly forward.

Her invisible plane would definitely take off from a treadmill, no doubt about it.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 3:55 PM on October 22, 2011 [4 favorites]


I love how she pushes them both at the same time, but they hit the ground in sequence.

Why wouldn't they? For simplicity, assume a point villain in vacuum; the time of flight will be t = 2v_y/g, where v_y is the vertical component of the launch velocity. Even if we assume WW imparts equal velocity to each villain (which would be unreasonable, equal momentum or equal kinetic energy would make more sense, and one is clearly fatter than the other), the time of flight will depend on the angle of their initial velocity with respect to the vertical.

Anyone who has played Angry Birds knows this.
posted by Dr Dracator at 3:58 PM on October 22, 2011 [5 favorites]


I don't get it. Why are we posting my childhood in 90 second clips? It's going to take metafilter centuries to finish at this rate.

I'm pretty sure I saw this one when it was originally broadcast.
posted by cjorgensen at 4:34 PM on October 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


jonp72: "Dear Lynda Carter,

Thank you for convincing legions of girls in the mid-1970s to play superhero in their underwear.

Sincerely,

Any Boy Who Went Through Kindergarten in the mid-70
"

Heh. I agree completely. My little sister likely is not quite so thankful. She took a "Look, I am Wonder Woman" inspired leap from my mother's dresser across my parent's bed... and went headfirst into the corner of my father's nightstand. Stitches ensued.
posted by John Smallberries at 4:47 PM on October 22, 2011


Wonder Woman Helmet, you will be mine.

In 1979, my favorite outfit was a front-zip forest green double-knit pantsuit with a big butterfly collar (all one piece) with my Wonder Woman Underoos underneath. So that I could spin and in one big UNZZZIP become Wonder Woman.

Eventually, my kindergarten teacher banned me from wearing this outfit to school.
posted by rumposinc at 4:59 PM on October 22, 2011 [33 favorites]


I was disappointed to learn that Lynda Carter of Wonder Woman fame wasn't the person who had been married to Robert Altman.

Yeah, Linda Carter was married to Robert Altman, and it was this Linda Carter. It just wasn't that Robert Altman.
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 5:41 PM on October 22, 2011


"Damn you, we could have got away if you'd only have driven uphill!"
posted by seanmpuckett at 6:26 PM on October 22, 2011 [5 favorites]


Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman is the lady who made the young jonmc realize he was heterosexual.
posted by jonmc at 6:52 PM on October 22, 2011


Sure, all of you laugh. This is almost exactly the way my Uncle Louie wound up going to jail back in the early 80's.
posted by PlusDistance at 6:55 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


Well at least he was wearing a helmet, PlusDistance.
posted by Spatch at 6:58 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


Courtesy of Linda Carter, my ass!!!!! (no disrespect to that beautiful blue-eyed glamazon)

but

Courtesy of Jeannie Epper, yo!
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 7:01 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


ps, your tag makes me laugh.

Wo, der, woman!
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 7:03 PM on October 22, 2011


Gory images of Gaddafi.

clealy, sir, should have had a skateboard

Exotic pets being slaughtered.

clealy, sir, should have had skateboards

The EU on the verge of a financial meltdown

clealy, sir, the potential of the skateboard market and new factories would do wonders for that
posted by pyramid termite at 7:23 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]



It's hard to believe she once screamed at me to get off her lawn and take my fucking organist with me.


You can not just leave us hanging like that with no explanation. I demand satisfaction.
posted by The Whelk at 7:25 PM on October 22, 2011


You know, with every superhero series going Grim Dark Blue Filter, can we have a sunny, campy, day-glo Wonder Woman adaptation?
posted by The Whelk at 7:28 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


She can flout the law of gravity and has other magical powers, but she wears a helmet. And high heels on a skateboard.

The only episode I remember was some aliens turning people into tetrahedra. For some reason. It was awesome and stupid, like television was meant to be.
posted by DU at 7:29 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


I had pretty much the same experience as sonascope, but she told me to "put my fucking pianist away". I thought this was kinda crazy since I couldn't see any pianist, so I zipped up my pants and left.
posted by swell at 8:03 PM on October 22, 2011 [3 favorites]


Wow, that tetrahedron one, where every victim picks up the pyramids the same one-handed way... I would've guessed that was a Bionic Woman episode, but you're right. Now the only Bionic Woman episode that I can remember is the one on the air base where everyone is affected by sound except for the deaf daughter of a pilot.
posted by blueberry at 8:23 PM on October 22, 2011 [2 favorites]


i had to turn it off at 12:15 when those pyramids started crawling toward the navy guy. it was like the fox scene in Antichrist but with meat.
posted by This, of course, alludes to you at 8:35 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


Metafilter: A broad on a skateboard comin' after us.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 9:10 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


also pointed out to me by a friend: wonder woman is mongo footed
posted by fuzzypantalones at 9:49 PM on October 22, 2011 [1 favorite]


Seriously, in those shoes?

What did you expect? Kinky boots?
posted by DreamerFi at 12:22 AM on October 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


Ooh, ooh, I get to tell my Lynda Carter story!

So in 2003 we went to DC to visit my mother. And we were having some lunch before waiting for one of those tourist buses, just sitting at a booth, looking out the window, eating sandwiches.

And this lady walked in and ordered a sandwich to go. I caught her reflection in the window, and I thought 'Holy shit, that woman looks exactly like Lynda Carter!'

But then I got a closer look and it wasn't her.

True story.
posted by obiwanwasabi at 3:51 AM on October 23, 2011 [3 favorites]


She should have gotten roller skates in the spin too. They missed a real opportunity for roller derby Wonder Woman here.

(I also spent a lot of time twirling as a kid. WW or Electra Woman and Dynagirl for the backyard playing win.)
posted by amj at 6:59 AM on October 23, 2011


Who leaves a perfectly good skateboard lying in a parking lot like that? This is ridiculous.
posted by Meatbomb at 7:38 AM on October 23, 2011


Who leaves a perfectly good skateboard lying in a parking lot like that? This is ridiculous.

It belongs to the kidnapped girl in the car. Wonder Woman not only takes down the bad guys, she also returned the skateboard.
posted by device55 at 7:46 AM on October 23, 2011 [2 favorites]


Oh, good, that all makes sense now.
posted by Meatbomb at 7:59 AM on October 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


Wonder Woman on a skateboard reminds me of Monty Python's "choose your death" scene from the Meaning of Life.
posted by headnsouth at 8:59 AM on October 23, 2011


OK, I take it all back. The '70s can live now.
posted by psoas at 9:31 AM on October 23, 2011


And this wonderful thread reminded me that it's been too long since I listened to Kirsty MacColl's "In These Shoes"... and the rest of that fantastic album!

Died pushing her son out of the way of a drunken boater. Motherflailing hero.
posted by IAmBroom at 4:56 PM on October 23, 2011 [1 favorite]


That street isn't that ugly. Actually it's pretty striking.

Also 70's cars are better looking than today's cars, at least!
posted by Praxis at 11:53 PM on October 23, 2011


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