Are you paying attention, boy?
November 17, 2011 6:35 PM   Subscribe

He does not cook like you do. But I would like an invitation for dinner: Cajun Stuffed Pork Chops with Bacon

Hot Pickled Eggs & Sausage

Steaks 'n Gravy

Smothered Pork Chops

Hot Chili Dogs

Crawfish Boil

North Carolina Cole Slaw & Hot Dogs with Chili

Seafood Filé Gumbo

Cajun Boiled Peanuts

Chocolate Crack

BBQ Rant/Rules


Just in time for the holidays...

How to Cook Juicy Turkey, Part 1

How to Cook Juicy Turkey, Part 2

How to Bake a Rainbow Cake

More than food:

Hair Dryer Repair Tips for the Girls
posted by Toekneesan (40 comments total) 33 users marked this as a favorite

 
I don't know, he cooks pretty much like I do, and almost every other Cajun I know. I'm just not as loud.
posted by shecky57 at 6:40 PM on November 17, 2011 [1 favorite]


He does not cook like you do.

You don't know me.
posted by StickyCarpet at 6:43 PM on November 17, 2011 [3 favorites]


Cajun Stuffed Pork Chops with Bacon

How do you stuff a whole person into a pork chop?!
posted by kmz at 6:47 PM on November 17, 2011 [5 favorites]


TICK CUT POKE CHOPS!

Gotta admire a man who's only two cooking utensils are a paring knife and a plastic fork.
posted by Slap*Happy at 6:48 PM on November 17, 2011 [1 favorite]


How do you stuff a whole person into a pork chop?!

That's pork chops, plural. Invite some friends for dinner, and one enemy.
posted by axiom at 6:55 PM on November 17, 2011 [2 favorites]


The phrase "Tighten it up" for adding seasoning is one I'm going to steal.

I also think this is the key to why Sotherners are reputed to make good soldiers. If you regularly eat food like this a bullet is probably not something you're scared of, either because survival past 20 without suffering a coronary proves you're nigh impossible to kill or, rather like the Ḥashshāshīn, you've tasted heaven and now have no fear of death.
posted by Grimgrin at 6:57 PM on November 17, 2011 [5 favorites]


Reminded me of this: Bourney Makes an Apple Pie.
posted by pmcp at 7:14 PM on November 17, 2011 [1 favorite]


His BBQ tips mirror what I learned from my grandfather and uncles. I love that his only tip for gas grills is to use it to clean the grates from your wood grill/smoker.
posted by weirdoactor at 7:39 PM on November 17, 2011


Aw man I love this.
posted by basicchannel at 7:41 PM on November 17, 2011


OK maybe I shouldn't have started with the chili dog video, but that was basically horrifying. Needs a NSFWASP tag :)
posted by sevenyearlurk at 7:55 PM on November 17, 2011


"Horrifying" is obviously hyperbole of course. I have no objection to Cajun food - would love to try that crawfish boil - but this is a little like an unwanted look into the kitchen of the local greasy spoon. A little too real for me.
posted by sevenyearlurk at 8:09 PM on November 17, 2011


My first thought was that this was going to be a new episode of Henry's Kitchen. Oh well.
posted by detachd at 8:19 PM on November 17, 2011


I;M GONNA DO POAHK
WIT MOH POAHK.
BAYCON.

WITH SEASUNNIN-- SALD.
SALD.
AN SUM EMFUHZEEMUH.

AKOOWHAKHAKHHAAHH. PTOOEY.
posted by herrdoktor at 8:20 PM on November 17, 2011 [1 favorite]


Cajun Stuffed Pork Chops with Bacon

How do you stuff a whole person into a pork chop?!


They're using Kevin Bacon, and he's something of a Hollow Man.
posted by ShutterBun at 8:31 PM on November 17, 2011 [1 favorite]


Not sure how you missed this one.
posted by TheShadowKnows at 8:34 PM on November 17, 2011


"now let's haul off and do the other one"

I was really hoping he was going to whip out a bottle of caramel ice cream topping on those sweet taters.
posted by sourwookie at 8:46 PM on November 17, 2011


He's 25 years old and still going strong b'y
posted by stbalbach at 9:11 PM on November 17, 2011


You can use a ziplock bag with the corner cut off to pipe the stuffing in. No need to buy a kitchenaid.

Here is my take on his recipe:

Pound out pork chop between to peices of parchment.
Add layer of panchetta.
Add thin layer of stove top stuffing, maybe some shaved black truffles.
Roll it up, tie it with twine if you must.
Brush the outside with some Dijon mustard and coat with cracked peppercorns.
Melt some butter in a pan, I prefer the Danish brand Lurpak. Carefully sear your pork roll in the butter making sure not to lose all your pepper corns.
Move pork roll into over to finish cooking.
Dump some brandy into the pan you browned the pork roll in, pour in some heavy cream, a little bit of Dijon mustard and a bunch more course black pepper, some minces shallots and let it reduce.

I am calling it Cajun Pork Roll Au Poivre.
I should YouTube that shit.
posted by Ad hominem at 10:37 PM on November 17, 2011 [5 favorites]


Replace the accent with a German one, and this is basically exactly how our teacher at high school taught us cooking. Apple strudel gets served "Straight out off da goddamn offen: throw a pile of vanilla ice cream on top, and mix up some of dat yellow stuff. Wass' called? Custard? Yeah, that yellow custard shit. You listening, boy?"
posted by lollusc at 11:16 PM on November 17, 2011 [2 favorites]


Holy sweet tastefuck I need to make that, ad hom
posted by flaterik at 1:21 AM on November 18, 2011


Unless you're just making things up that I will think are delicious. I really can't tell if that idea is sarcastic or not. The truffles are throwing me.
posted by flaterik at 1:28 AM on November 18, 2011


I liked "Hot Chili Dogs", where he basically used a premade chili kit because it was all already measured out... Still fun to just listen to.

That said, he put in tomatoes, and then red wine. Red wine. I almost always put some a nice amber beer in my chili, but I've never done wine. Anyone tried this?
posted by nickgb at 2:09 AM on November 18, 2011


Sure. Wine's a pretty natural match for chili, actually. The bigger, the better, imho. A fat Shiraz, for example, will cook-in amazingly well to a big, well-spiced/seasoned chili.
posted by Thorzdad at 3:42 AM on November 18, 2011


My husband walked in while I was watching the barbecue rant and started cheering this guy on, snarfling and saying "I wanna see the crawfish one." I suspect we'll be eating off the grill this weekend...
posted by MonkeyToes at 4:05 AM on November 18, 2011


Add thin layer of stove top stuffing, maybe some shaved black truffles.

Nothing like stove top stuffing and truffles.
posted by kenko at 5:30 AM on November 18, 2011 [1 favorite]


I love this guy.

Extra bonus points:

He calls a good result "union" and a bad result "non-union".

He uses Slap Ya Mama seasoning (I'm addicted to Slap Ya Mama).

Thanks for the links.

Time to make some gumbo.
posted by Benny Andajetz at 5:48 AM on November 18, 2011 [1 favorite]


The Chocolate Crack recipe is good stuff, I usually use club crackers but any cracker will do (there is a related video that uses matzoh). I top it with some finely chopped almonds. Once it's set, I cut it into bite-sized pieces with a pizza cutter and save all the shrapnel for ice cream topping.
posted by peeedro at 6:04 AM on November 18, 2011


Just a bit sarcastic, I think it would be pretty good. Cept you should use cognac to deglaze the plan, not brandy.
posted by Ad hominem at 8:17 AM on November 18, 2011


He should toss some cocoa powder into that chili. I would also throw in some of the adobo from canned chipotle. You can also add chipotle adobo to ketchup, use it on your burger for a taste sensation!
posted by Ad hominem at 9:19 AM on November 18, 2011 [1 favorite]


Ad hominem, chipotle adobo might just make ketchup worthwhile. Thanks!
posted by IAmBroom at 10:07 AM on November 18, 2011


Ketcup is one step away from being BBQ sauce.

I took an odd interest in ketchup after it was declared perfect. Like there is no way to improve it.

I made dozens of different ketchup based sauces, my goal was an "urban" BBQ sauce to counteract all the Texas and southern BBQ sauces. I made a bunch with Hennesy and Jameson's to counteract all the Jack Daniels sauces. I even tried stuff like putting pickling spices in it so i could get pickle flavored BBQ sauce.

Here is a basic recipe I scrawled down.

1/4 cup cider vinegar
1/2 cup ketchup
3 tbs brown sugar
1 tbs honey
1 tsp salt
1 tsp chili powder
1 tsp red pepper flakes
5 drops liquid smoke
5 drops worcheshire

I have like 10 versions of this on scraps of paper.I kinda feel bad for my girlfriend at the time who I made taste all the raw ingredients and finished sauces. It took some doing to get her to taste a tsp of liquid smoke. But then again, I tasted all the food she was feeding her cat to figure out why the cat liked some and not others.
posted by Ad hominem at 10:34 AM on November 18, 2011 [1 favorite]


This just in... Stuffed chocolate chip cookies.
posted by Toekneesan at 10:46 AM on November 18, 2011


Oreos: already cooked
posted by silby at 12:01 PM on November 18, 2011


he's awesome but he is also Foghorn Leghorn. (also ad hominem wow, I've developed a new level of appreciation for you in this here, I say, this heah thread)
posted by supermedusa at 1:39 PM on November 18, 2011


Yep, Foghorn Leghorn. I was thinking the same thing.

I wasn't planning on cooking this weekend but now I think I will. And set up the camera too.
posted by djeo at 3:01 PM on November 18, 2011


Nice boy, but he's as sharp as a bag of wet mice.
posted by Slap*Happy at 8:11 PM on November 18, 2011


Heey Boy! JB here, Nice thread I feel honored. Thanks
posted by 007bondjb at 8:06 AM on November 19, 2011 [5 favorites]


How to bake a rainbow cake
posted by 007bondjb at 8:13 AM on November 19, 2011


Hey, JB. Welcome!
posted by Toekneesan at 8:28 AM on November 19, 2011


I just made sausage gravy and biscuits for breakfast, and I said to my wife that the sausage worked pretty well with biscuits and gravy, in spite of the fact that it was Amish sausage.

"They make sausage out of the Amish now? Hmmm. They're pretty tasty. Leaner than they look." was her reply.
posted by Toekneesan at 5:30 AM on November 20, 2011


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