Depressives unite!

December 6, 2011 5:35 AM

"What was really most healing, for me, besides the drugs, was meeting my own people, my tribe. When you meet each other the relief of knowing you’re not alone and that you both feel like the walking dead. It’s such a relief to be with someone who will never say, “Perk up.” Black Dog Tribes is a (beta) social platform for people with depression created by Ruby Wax.
posted by lucia__is__dada (17 comments total)

This is so true. When I'm depressed, the only people (other than my partner) that I want to be with are other depressed people.

I'm afraid that my depression would probably prevent me from attempting to navigate that website, though. Non-depressed me is even having a hard time with it.
posted by ocherdraco at 6:00 AM on December 6, 2011

*Thumbs up!*

what?
posted by leotrotsky at 6:09 AM on December 6, 2011

I'll say, as someone who has dealt with depression, that being surrounded exclusively by depressed people might not help.
posted by CautionToTheWind at 6:13 AM on December 6, 2011 [5 favorites]

I understand where you're coming from, Caution, and I partly agree. However, as someone who has dealt with some pretty crippling depression throughout my entire life, I also know that talking with other depressives doesn't usually end up being an amplifier. It's actually somewhat helpful just knowing there are others as messed-up as you.
posted by Thorzdad at 6:19 AM on December 6, 2011 [2 favorites]

I've clicked through "What helps => How to click for your tribe =(scroll down)> Click and find your tribe" twice now. Apparently that doesn't help?

If you can find "how to click for your tribe," you've already mastered the clicking skills necessary to click for your tribe. If you've reached "What helps," which sure as hell sounds helpful, making the first link in that cloud send you back to the beginning of the process is an unfortunate UI decision for a site dedicated to a disorder that, for many, is characterized by the sensation of being caught in an endless cycle.

This is apparently the case for every tribe-cloud-thing.

[Copied to the feedback addy -- I hope the UI catches up to the sentiment!]
posted by lumensimus at 6:24 AM on December 6, 2011

At least there's likely to be better black humour.
posted by jaduncan at 6:25 AM on December 6, 2011 [1 favorite]

I think it's really down to what kind of other depressives you're around, Caution. Knowing that people can relate to my problems really reduces the self imposed idea of being crazy. People who aren't depressed just don't get it. On the other hand, yes, some people can't/don't want to rise above, and misery loves company.
posted by Roman Graves at 6:51 AM on December 6, 2011

" [...] for people with depression created by Ruby Wax."

I clicked that link immediately because I was very curious what kind of new street drug had the name 'Ruby Wax' and wanted to know how the scientific community had positively correlated use of this drug to to depression. Ruby Wax, right? Like some kind of claret-colored tar heroin.

Imagine my disappointment. Relief too, I suppose, but mainly disappointment.
posted by komara at 7:11 AM on December 6, 2011 [3 favorites]

She just needs a bit o' oooooh Shock Treatment!
posted by Reverend John at 7:37 AM on December 6, 2011

Ha - I thought it was an article about people who'd become depressed watching Ruby Wax.
posted by zeoslap at 8:00 AM on December 6, 2011 [1 favorite]

I've signed up for the site (it's very beta at the moment, but here's hoping).

Ruby Wax helped me survive one of the worst bouts with depression I've ever had.
Her shows (how the hell did i manage to see them in Los Angeles in the 1990's? or early 2000's?) were able to make me laugh when things in my life as a poor person in L.A. had ceased to amuse me.

Highlights:
Ruby talking Roseanne into getting into a bathtub with her, and discussing food issues. Then the horrible, awful, hilarious, truly pissed-off silence that followed after Roseanne wondered why it was so hard for her to stop eating and Ruby, laughing, said "You're a big pig." After the deadly pause when we, the viewers, along with Ruby, realized that calling Roseanne a big pig was, apparently, over the line, Roseanne said something like "WHAT?!" in a tone that can only ever be mastered by people who are so not used to being anything-but-glad-handed by their inferiors that any honesty directed towards them completely short-circuits their brain. Then, Ruby made me love her FOREVER by having the chutzpah to, while sitting practically in Roseanne's lap, REPEAT HERSELF, albeit in a much smaller, quite uncertain, seemingly fearful voice, like a 5-year-old who has been asked to repeat the curse word she has used and knows she will be punished, yet can not tell a lie: "You're a big pig..."
Then the interview was over.
(have looked for this clip for years, but can not find it on the internet. Would love to link to it)

Ruby interviewing Imelda Marcos IN her shoe closet, mocking her to her face, and getting Imelda to laughingly say "They're mostly just espadrilles!"

Ruby getting Zsa Zsa to explain where her husband's penis was when the Shih Tzu bit it. (TERRIBLE sound quality but might be worth the slog)

Ruby talking Sandra Bullock into putting on a waitress uniform to see which one of them really was the better waitress
posted by mer2113 at 8:08 AM on December 6, 2011 [3 favorites]

It would be hard for that site to provide better Depression Support than (for me) the Hyperbole and a Half "Adventures in Depression" thread here. Good luck, Ruby.
posted by oneswellfoop at 9:31 AM on December 6, 2011

shared pain is lessened
posted by LogicalDash at 9:35 AM on December 6, 2011

You just quoted Spider Robinson.

Now I'm depressed all over again.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 10:46 AM on December 6, 2011

I find the best company to be people who have been through depression, but are not in the thick of it at the same time I'm in my own hole. We take turns, and there is empathy and perspective to share from the well one to the unwell one, instead of two people each in their own miserable echo chamber of distortion and despair.

I don't think I could participate much in a community centered around this or any other malady. It's not like gardening or knitting or raising chickens. Depression is the thing that gets in the way of things like that. It's speedbumps and pot holes, not scenery.
posted by Lou Stuells at 11:01 AM on December 6, 2011 [2 favorites]

It is an open secret that joining this site is the first step to eventually being invited to join Free Trader Beowulf. If you're smart enough.
posted by rusty at 12:01 PM on December 6, 2011 [1 favorite]

In the Guardian this week. Good for her, every little helps.
posted by arcticseal at 4:21 AM on December 13, 2011