It's ...

January 12, 2012 6:10 PM

Bookstore Waterstone's changes its name to ... Waterstones.
posted by anothermug (81 comments total)

punctuation is repressive i commend waterstones we should all strive to live free
posted by Flood at 6:14 PM on January 12 [7 favorites]

Probably better than when that one chain renamed itself to Waldenbook's.
posted by hippybear at 6:15 PM on January 12 [5 favorites]

Waterstones
posted by Horace Rumpole at 6:17 PM on January 12

Could be worse.
posted by leotrotsky at 6:19 PM on January 12

Meh. Iconic Canadian donut chain Tim Horton's shifted a decade or more ago to the nonsensical Tim Hortons. I doubt one customer in a thousand noticed.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 6:20 PM on January 12 [1 favorite]

Worse
posted by leotrotsky at 6:20 PM on January 12

Im not really sure thisll work
posted by Saxon Kane at 6:20 PM on January 12

Apostrophes everywhere are outraged.
posted by jonmc at 6:22 PM on January 12

How long until apostropes are eliminated entirely from the english language. Cant come soon enough Id say.
posted by Ad hominem at 6:24 PM on January 12 [5 favorites]

Sounds more bookish than Liquid Balls.
posted by Trurl at 6:25 PM on January 12 [4 favorites]

They read Finnegans Wake and had an epiphany.
posted by Houyhnhnm at 6:27 PM on January 12 [3 favorites]

While listening to R.E.M.'s "Feeling Gravitys Pull," perhaps.
posted by valrus at 6:29 PM on January 12

Personally I like the related article. Waterstone's: Mein Kampf is 'perfect Christmas present'.
posted by valrus at 6:30 PM on January 12 [3 favorites]

I think its an improvement.
posted by 2bucksplus at 6:32 PM on January 12

Waterstones.
posted by charlie don't surf at 6:32 PM on January 12

How long until apostropes are eliminated entirely from the english language. Cant come soon enough Id say.

It'll be Cormac McCarthy's final revenge on us all.
posted by dng at 6:33 PM on January 12 [1 favorite]

“I would be most obliged if Waterstone’s would explain what lies behind the apparent zeal on their part to promote this disgusting work.

“When challenging one of the staff in Manchester’s Deansgate branch, I was told that it was a Christmas bestseller which sold really well - a dubious justification indeed for selling this hateful work.”

Oh man, British people being outraged is so cute! Somone should do a tumblr or outraged Britons speaking.
posted by Ad hominem at 6:34 PM on January 12 [2 favorites]

Holy shit valrus. That article is awesome -- it almost reads like an ironically crass corporate viral video designed to SELL Mein Kampf.

I mean, the guy who complains that the store's explanation is "a dubious justification indeed" ... are we supposed people actually talk like that? Like a monocled cartoon walrus version of a Britisher?
posted by Saxon Kane at 6:35 PM on January 12 [3 favorites]

As long as the grocer's apostrophe remains, I'm OK.
posted by waitingtoderail at 6:35 PM on January 12 [1 favorite]

You laugh, but I had waterstones once. Not a fun night.
posted by found missing at 6:36 PM on January 12 [1 favorite]

grocer's apostrophe's are awesome
posted by hippybear at 6:41 PM on January 12 [4 favorites]

There's an Apostrophe Protection Society?
posted by gfrobe at 6:45 PM on January 12 [4 favorites]

This happens in Canada sometimes because the apostrophe use only really makes sense in English; for Tim Horton(')s in particular, Wikipedia notes that "Some older locations retain signage with the company's name including a possessive apostrophe, despite the fact that the official styling of the company's name has been Tim Hortons, without an apostrophe, for at least a decade. The company had removed the apostrophe after signs using the apostrophe were considered to be breaking the language sign laws of the Province of Quebec in 1993. The removal of the apostrophe allowed the company to have one common sign image across Canada."
posted by oulipian at 6:50 PM on January 12 [8 favorites]

Someone should go all Banksy on them and stealthily replace bestselling books with exact copies minus all the apostrophes.

In a pinch, just redoing the covers will work: "Gravitys Rainbow", "Miss Smillas Feeling for Snow".

(But perhaps "Eats, Shoots & Leave's", just to keep it interesting.)
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 6:51 PM on January 12 [2 favorites]

I'm confused by Carl's Jr's apostrophe.
posted by eddydamascene at 6:52 PM on January 12

I'm confused by Carl's Jr's apostrophe.

Don't be confused any longer. According to Wikipedia, Carl Karcher had a single, standalone restaurant, Carl's Drive-In Barbecue. The franchise chain he spun off of this was Carl's Jr, presumably because they were smaller version of his original drive-in.
posted by hippybear at 6:56 PM on January 12

The "Junior" in Carl's Jr is that Carl Karcher had a "senior" restaurant called Carl's Drive-In Barbecue in Anaheim, California.
posted by basicchannel at 6:59 PM on January 12

Doh!
posted by basicchannel at 6:59 PM on January 12

They read Finnegans Wake and had an epiphany.

I've always read that as a command, to Finnegans everywhere, to wake up.
posted by kersplunk at 7:05 PM on January 12 [2 favorites]

'
posted by HuronBob at 7:06 PM on January 12 [4 favorites]

As long as they got controversy anyway they should change it again to WHAT STONES.
posted by nanojath at 7:09 PM on January 12 [1 favorite]

How is that pronounced, anyway? Is it like two english words "water stones", or is there some kind of "waterstuns" sort of thing going on?
posted by hippybear at 7:14 PM on January 12

Reminds me of a local store that for many years was named Curtain's Everywere. It was the subject of much discussion in our english classes. At some point they got rid of the apostrophe, but left the were. Now they've changed the name completely.
posted by Joe Chip at 7:16 PM on January 12 [4 favorites]

Oh man, British people being outraged is so cute! Somone should do a tumblr or outraged Britons speaking.

Fuck you.
posted by Artw at 7:31 PM on January 12 [10 favorites]

(See what I dis there?)
posted by Artw at 7:32 PM on January 12

Could be worse.

Worse

Worst.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:33 PM on January 12 [1 favorite]

Fuck you.

Oh, I just want to pinch your little cheeks, Art.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 7:41 PM on January 12 [12 favorites]

I'd be truly impressed if Toys'R'Us managed to pull this off, and well they should. Although, they would have to adjust the brow-level of their toy selection accordingly, and deal with sign kerning "issues," and mislead their captive audience (children) that written language is somehow valuable.
Screw it, let's just eat some Dominoes (pizza).
posted by obscurator at 7:42 PM on January 12

The apostrophe I don't get is the one in Ruth's Chris Steakhouse.
posted by iconjack at 8:52 PM on January 12

The apostrophe I don't get is the one in Ruth's Chris Steakhouse.

There once was a restaurant in New Orleans called Chris Steak House. Ruth Fertel bought it, but was contractually obligated to keep using the "Chris" name for a certain amount of time. That restaurant burned down and she opened a new location named "Ruth's Chris". The chain expanded from there.

Seriously people, all this stuff is easy to find online.
posted by hippybear at 8:56 PM on January 12 [3 favorites]

oulipian: "This happens in Canada sometimes because the apostrophe use only really makes sense in English... The company had removed the apostrophe after signs using the apostrophe were considered to be breaking the language sign laws of the Province of Quebec in 1993."

Most famously, the Eaton's department store became "Eatons".

Legend tells of a giant warehouse deep in Montreal's anglophone West Island, guarding all the banished apostrophes and awaiting the return of the Great Punctuator.
posted by vasi at 9:06 PM on January 12 [5 favorites]

Waterstones
posted by hattifattener at 9:14 PM on January 12

Kind of unrelated, but it made me think of how Marina Bay changed its name to Marina Bay.
posted by destrius at 9:15 PM on January 12

Well, now I know where to go when I want to buy more than one Waterstone.
posted by Decani at 9:41 PM on January 12

Or even just the one, I guess.
posted by Decani at 9:42 PM on January 12

Hey, can I have that apostrophe if you're not using it?
posted by StickyCarpet at 9:43 PM on January 12

After a rather a bit of trying, I'm starting to think it's impossible to make a portmanteau of apostrophe and apocalypse.
posted by aubilenon at 10:00 PM on January 12 [1 favorite]

apostrcalypse
posted by hippybear at 10:19 PM on January 12

"It's just plain wrong. It's grammatically incorrect. If Sainsbury's and McDonald's can get it right, then why can't Waterstones."

Kind of funny how there's no question mark at the end of that last sentence.
posted by dhammond at 10:26 PM on January 12 [1 favorite]

Apostrocalypse?
posted by BungaDunga at 10:28 PM on January 12 [1 favorite]

Man, I'm really craving a Dr Pepper now. Or maybe a Mtn Dew.
posted by argonauta at 10:51 PM on January 12 [1 favorite]

You know, I've been going to Waterstones (Waterstones'?) for ages, and I don't ever remember seeing an apostrophe in the name o.0
posted by anaximander at 11:20 PM on January 12

Tim Waterstone sold the store, so it's no longer Waterstone's store, it's just a store with a brand name, a string of letters and sounds that the customer associates with book sales. The apostrophe doesn't matter.

But how come you fonking font wonks are wanking about the font? No release for the hounds? Says the company:

Waterstones, the UK’s largest high street bookseller, has today revealed a new logo for the company. It reinstates the much-loved Baskerville serif font with a capital W and no longer features an apostrophe.

James Daunt, Managing Director of Waterstones said: “Waterstones is an iconic brand deserving a capital W, and a font that reflects authority and confidence – Baskerville does just that.”

“Waterstones without an apostrophe is, in a digital world of URLs and email addresses, a more versatile and practical spelling. It also reflects an altogether truer picture of our business today which, while created by one, is now built on the continued contribution of thousands of individual booksellers.”

posted by pracowity at 11:27 PM on January 12

Give it a couple of years and a change of fashion and we might get Waterstones's.
posted by Abiezer at 11:49 PM on January 12 [2 favorites]

Meh. I only ever use them to examine the stock anyway. When I actually buy, I buy from Amazon's.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 12:07 AM on January 13 [2 favorites]

This is a store which was founded by Mr. Waterstone. Therefore, it should be "Waterstone's." Even if it was owned by several children, then "Waterstones'" would be correct.

I'll still be using the apostrophe just to be annoying. I'll write "King's Heath" and "King's Norton" instead of "Kings Norton/Heath" until I die. And in each of my subsequent rebirths.
posted by Ms. Moonlight at 12:14 AM on January 13 [1 favorite]

David Marsh of "International Apostrophe Day" weighs in on the matter in the Guardian: So, Waterstones – no apostrophe? Hey, no catastrophe.

'... apart from my initial response – tweeting "we can only hope Waterstones knows its shit" – I haven't joined the uproar.'
posted by Omission at 12:19 AM on January 13

One should remember to dot one's i's and cross one's t's.
posted by pracowity at 12:23 AM on January 13

Also, I meant to wonder why people are NOT wanking about the font. Here is one font lament from the previous rebranding. Now there should be joy that they have returned to the old font. I guess.
posted by pracowity at 12:44 AM on January 13

This is such old new for people in my neighbourhood - Kings Heath, Birmingham.

For those North Americans who click through and read the article an A-level is the final year before university.

And yes the 'man' behind it all is one of my local councilors but probably only until the next election because this stupid decision is maybe the least damaging one he has made.
posted by srboisvert at 1:21 AM on January 13

Oh man, British people being outraged is so cute! Somone should do a tumblr or outraged Britons speaking.

You'll notice that the Torygraph turned off the comments for that article, I suppose that on the presumably accurate assumption that most of the comments would have been far less cute and given the moderators plenty of work.

Rarely does an Internet discussion come this pre-Godwinned.
posted by Skeptic at 1:30 AM on January 13

I've always read that as a command, to Finnegans everywhere, to wake up.

Yeah. That, and "Cyclists use left shoulder" as an instruction on how to fall off properly.
posted by flabdablet at 1:44 AM on January 13 [1 favorite]

One would feel under some appreciable degree of obligation should you now kindly proceed to fuck, and the concomitant level of gratification would be materially enhanced if you could ensure that the manner of your doing so was right off.
posted by Segundus at 2:19 AM on January 13

And Barons Court's surprisingly as correct as Earl's Court...'s.
posted by Myeral at 2:26 AM on January 13

I'm surprised that James Daunt did this, because he always seemed like a traditionalist. I don't really mind though.

I've often been surprised that Harrods doesn't have an apostrophe - it was founded by Charles Henry Harrod, after all.

Also - Selfridges - no apostrophe
posted by DanCall at 2:45 AM on January 13

Waterstones to be renamed, "Oh, you immortal Gods! Waterstones".

In a dramatic about-face, the book retailer Waterstones has reacted to the criticism of its recent re-branding exercise by adding an apostrophe back into their name. The bookstore, previously known as "Waterstone's", has decided to mollify purists by adding an exclamatory rhetorical figure of speech directed to an imaginary person or abstract quality to the beginning of its name. "This should make EVERYONE happy," said James Daunt, the company's Chief Bookworm, who continued: "but, Oh! Great thunder-shaking Zeus! Will it receive your blessing?" Richard Dawkins was unavailable for comment.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 4:23 AM on January 13 [1 favorite]

At least they didn't market it as an essential Hanukkah present
posted by Renoroc at 4:32 AM on January 13

Once upon a time, somebody say to me
(This is the dog talkin' now)
What is your, conceptual, continuity?
Well I told 'em right then, Fido said
It should be easy to see
The crux of the biscuit is the apostrophe

-- Frank Zappa (Stink Foot)
posted by lordrunningclam at 4:37 AM on January 13 [2 favorites]

Oh man, British people being outraged is so cute! Somone should do a tumblr or outraged Britons speaking

I agree, cute as a button
posted by fullerine at 5:00 AM on January 13

There will be rioting in the streets of Parkers Prairie, MN.
posted by COBRA! at 5:39 AM on January 13

Specialty's Café & Bakery. Not founded by someone named "Specialty."
posted by kirkaracha at 6:44 AM on January 13

For Christ's Sake! is a brand of Japanese rice wine reported to be first produced by Jesus Christ himself. Enjoy the favourite tipple of the wedding at Cana with Christ's Sake!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 7:02 AM on January 13 [2 favorites]

Oh man, British people being outraged is so cute! Somone should do a tumblr or outraged Britons speaking

No need, we already had the news covering it last year.
posted by mippy at 7:05 AM on January 13 [1 favorite]

Also: cunt off.
posted by mippy at 7:06 AM on January 13 [3 favorites]

Also: cunt off.

That doesn't work here in the US. Makes it sound like female circumcision.
posted by hippybear at 7:09 AM on January 13

I know, the British People Getting Pompously Irritated By Stuff tumblr would lead to a whole world of confusion.
posted by mippy at 7:38 AM on January 13

Luckily Scotland is thinking about breaking up with its boyfriend, England, and digging a large trench near Hadrian's Wall, destroying forever Britain United FC. In the future, therefore, there will technically be no such thing as a "British" person, and thus Her Majesty the Queen must allow Jardis, Queen of the North, to sacrifice Prince Edward as demanded by certain magic from the dawn of time. Heavy snows expected. But: no more British people, hence no more British people getting annoyed about being told how cute they are when they are annoyed.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 8:35 AM on January 13 [1 favorite]

Oh man, British people being outraged is so cute!

One presumes that you've never heard of a Glasgow Kiss, a Chelsea Smile or a glassing.
posted by ob at 9:52 AM on January 13 [1 favorite]

there will technically be no such thing as a "British" person,

The thing is, people oft use 'British' when they mean English, and 'English' when they mean 'British'. I know few who would describe themselves as 'I am British'. And Britain is the chunk of land that England, Scotland and Wales sit on, which means you can't describe someone from Belfast as British, but a) that would never occur to people in N.America b) if you did you'd be opening a huge can of worms that I can't even begin to explain to people who haven't passed 'Referring To Residents of the United Kingdom Archipelago Level 1'.

It's a great ol' minefield.
posted by mippy at 9:53 AM on January 13

A farewell from the Oxford Street Waterstones.
posted by sysinfo at 10:54 AM on January 13 [4 favorites]

mippy: Yeah, I once made the mistake of calling a Welsh person "English" when I meant "British." They were not happy, so I've made sure to be more careful.
posted by Saxon Kane at 9:34 AM on January 18