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A cure for special snowflake syndrome.
March 28, 2012 10:24 AM   Subscribe

The mentality of your generation just boggles my mind. (SLYT)

A mom's take on the value of her son's creative endeavors. Warning: may bring back unpleasant memories for anyone who spent too much time in their room as a kid.
posted by crackingdes (201 comments total) 18 users marked this as a favorite

 
Obligatory.
posted by gcbv at 10:26 AM on March 28, 2012 [26 favorites]


I'm not sure I think we should be watching this.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 10:29 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


There was a reddit thread on this yesterday, IIRC a producer from Attack of The Show showed up, and they're trying to get this kid out to LA to appear on it.
posted by hellojed at 10:29 AM on March 28, 2012


I totally forgot how awkward and uncomfortable and shitty it was when you were over at a friend's house and his mom starts yelling at him about god knows what and you're not sure whether to leave or watch or what and jesus how long is this going to go on. SO THANKS
posted by theodolite at 10:31 AM on March 28, 2012 [84 favorites]


Well, that was fun.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 10:31 AM on March 28, 2012


This feels eavesdroppy and not good.
posted by jquinby at 10:31 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


But all I wanted was a Pepsi.
posted by loquacious at 10:32 AM on March 28, 2012 [50 favorites]


Well, he should leave home and stop leeching off his parents. All kids should. Otherwise they have no right to complain when their parents get pissy at them for slacking around. Seriously. Get a shitty little job, rent a shitty little room and get out from under your parents' feet. Or at least do the housework for them once in a while.
posted by Decani at 10:33 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


.....wow, was I a lucky goddamn teenager.

My mom drew the line at 3AM IRC chatting on a school night and updating my website instead of doing my homework. But when she found out I was staying late at school everyday so I could teach myself Photoshop on the AV club's computers, she was glad that I was learning a skill and staying out of trouble.

Now I draw comics all day on my computer and occasionally color animation frames in CS5 for freelance gigs. I wonder what direction my life would have taken if my parents had shamed me like the woman in that video for "wasting my life" in my room.
posted by Narrative Priorities at 10:33 AM on March 28, 2012 [9 favorites]


Dammit, I came in here to say he just wanted a Pepsi.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:33 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


All kids should.

uh what

I guess first I'll need to ask what you mean when you say "kids".
posted by pts at 10:34 AM on March 28, 2012 [5 favorites]


I made it about 3 seconds and was overcome by a feeling of being unable to wait until I moved out of this stupid town. When I woke up, I was almost 40 and had a kid of my own to whom I vow never to say these things.
posted by DU at 10:35 AM on March 28, 2012 [60 favorites]


So what was going on in Michigan?
posted by Fizz at 10:35 AM on March 28, 2012


I guess I am old because this is what I thought was obligatory.
posted by procrastination at 10:36 AM on March 28, 2012 [17 favorites]


The mom seems to think a lot of things are stupid. She should get a better vocabulary. When I was a kid our parents made us look up words in dictionaries and thesauruses and so forth. We were expected to show a knowledge of a variety of words in our conversations with others. Otherwise people would think you were stupid. Adults these days.
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 10:36 AM on March 28, 2012 [13 favorites]


ENGL amps aren't exactly cheap. Either he went out and bought a (what appears to be) a $2000 guitar amp with his own money, in which case he's doing better than I did as a teenager, or his parents bought it for him. In that case, either "Mom" was just having a bad day and taking it out needlessly on him, or his dad bought him the amp and she's taking out her resentment that his father would buy him something so nice even though he's "lazy."

I'm entirely guessing, but the whole time all I was thinking was how expensive that amp is, and wondering who paid for it.
posted by chimaera at 10:37 AM on March 28, 2012 [10 favorites]


"The guitar's alright as a hobby John, but you'll never make a living out of it."
posted by yoink at 10:38 AM on March 28, 2012 [13 favorites]


"We're Not Gonna Take It" is from 1984. "Institutionalized" is from 1983. You're actually too young, if anything.
posted by Ipsifendus at 10:39 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


> In that case, either "Mom" was just having a bad day and taking it out needlessly on him

Yeah, it seemed to me that there was some displacement going on there. I'm just glad my mother didn't care as long as there wasn't any smoke inside the house.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:39 AM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


His band has some pretty wild music.
posted by a womble is an active kind of sloth at 10:40 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


"We're Not Gonna Take It" is from 1984. "Institutionalized" is from 1983. You're actually too young, if anything.

Good news, everyone!
posted by procrastination at 10:40 AM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


If we accept the rule of thumb that 10,000 hours is the minimum required effort to become an expert at something, a person who begins learning guitar at age 7 would need to play guitar an average of 3 hours each day to become an expert guitarist by age 17.
posted by vanar sena at 10:42 AM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


I didn't think moms were still like this. Aren't they all my age now? 40s? This seems plucked from another era. Although, I suppose, bad parenting is timeless?
posted by morerio at 10:42 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


And as to the mother's question "In what way is your life contributing to society," it appears as though the answer is that he is making instructional videos teaching others how to operate complicated audio equipment and sharing that knowledge for free to others. I do wonder in what way the mother's life is contributing to society, perhaps she is voting against Obama or listening to talk radio all day or performing other such noble acts.
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 10:42 AM on March 28, 2012 [54 favorites]


Dammit, I came in here to say he just wanted a Pepsi.

I just noticed that gcbv beat us both to it in the first comment by linking to the video.

And, damn, I'm old and jaded. Mike Muir now looks like a totally unthreatening little kid in that video.
posted by loquacious at 10:45 AM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Hey! It's DRI's Madman, part 2! (grooveshark link)
posted by symbioid at 10:45 AM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Is it troubling that the top favorite YT video is the suicide scene from "The Rules of Attraction"?

My gut says it is.
posted by LeanGreen at 10:45 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


Trigger warning for people whose parents used to yell at them for being awesome at guitar.
posted by littlerobothead at 10:46 AM on March 28, 2012 [17 favorites]



This is my favorite.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 10:47 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


Dear Mom:

I know teenage Whelk was not a joyous hosanna upon the clouds but thanks for at least taking me seriously when I said I wanted to be an artist and signing me up for lessons and the like. Yeah I know I kept odd hours and had odd friends and while you still keep suggesting I should be a lawyer (none of the lawyers I know have jobs) thanks for not piling on me like this.

Love (Oh and Happy Birthday),
-TW
posted by The Whelk at 10:47 AM on March 28, 2012 [33 favorites]


Guy straight sucks at talking to his mother
posted by MangyCarface at 10:47 AM on March 28, 2012 [8 favorites]


the whole time all I was thinking was how expensive that amp is, and wondering who paid for it

I'm glad I wasn't the only one. I actually missed the beginning of the rant because I was wondering why a teenager--or anybody posting bedroom videos on YouTube, frankly--would need a head like that.

And frankly, the rant sounds like frustration. Do you have any idea how loud a 100W head is? Now imagine living with one cranking out death metal growls and pick squeals all day long. She's kind of a bitch, but let's be honest, you'd snap too, eventually.
posted by uncleozzy at 10:47 AM on March 28, 2012 [11 favorites]


My potential musical career was torpedoed before it left the dock by too many dismissive "you'll never make it in music" comments from my family, guidance counselor, etc. I vividly recognized that mom's harangue from my own childhood; all that horrible angry helplessness and depression came rushing back within the first 30 seconds of that video. I couldn't bear to watch the rest.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:47 AM on March 28, 2012 [10 favorites]


Also, (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates: YES.
posted by littlerobothead at 10:47 AM on March 28, 2012


I must be old, because I'm sort of siding with his mom.
posted by crunchland at 10:48 AM on March 28, 2012 [8 favorites]


I don't think there was a day between age 12 and the time I moved out that my mom didn't wake me up in a similar manner.

I showed her though. Today I'm a mid-level IT guy who has made over 4000 comments on a community weblog!

Also, I have my own child now and I sure hope I can rein in the crazy when he's a teenager.
posted by bondcliff at 10:48 AM on March 28, 2012 [12 favorites]


Best song on Godfodder.
posted by humboldt32 at 10:48 AM on March 28, 2012


If this guy is, say, in his twenties and genuinely has accomplished nothing, I might have some sympathy for mom.

If he's a teen? I say this as a teacher: Mom, quit being a shitty parent. He could have SUCH worse interests and habits than this.
posted by scaryblackdeath at 10:49 AM on March 28, 2012 [5 favorites]


Seriously. Get a shitty little job, rent a shitty little room and get out from under your parents' feet.

I like to imagine you're wearing a grey flannel suit and yelling this at an invalid.
posted by shakespeherian at 10:50 AM on March 28, 2012 [40 favorites]


Where would you even get a grey flannel suit these days?
posted by TwelveTwo at 10:54 AM on March 28, 2012


It was ever thus!
posted by smudgedlens at 10:54 AM on March 28, 2012


I didn’t watch it all, but I was just thinking the kid’s an ass for putting this video up. Somehow he has a really expensive amp, but not his own place to live, and he wants to publicly humiliate his mom.
posted by bongo_x at 10:54 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


scaryblackdeath: "If he's a teen?"

He's 17.
posted by vanar sena at 10:55 AM on March 28, 2012


Trigger warning? Jesus fuck.
posted by odinsdream at 10:55 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


This kid's profile says he's seventeen. Yeah, I think she should ease up on him a bit.
posted by duvatney at 10:56 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


Seriously. Get a shitty little job, rent a shitty little room and get out from under your parents' feet.

You know, my dad would come home from spending a day catching fish only to let them go, and feeding the mosquitoes while he was at it, to harangue me for wasting my life playing on the computer.

Now, I have a degree in EE and work doing data processing and management for SCIENCE! and I have my own kid.

And yeah, sometimes I come home from work and the dishes aren't done and the boy is glued to his screen playing Minecraft or some other nonsense and I get kinda peeved.

Then I remember those times my dad came home and bitched at me.

My son - like me at the time - did things that needed doing. But life is short and there are always chores.

If you've got the time to kill, you should kill it - and enjoy the killing - because it is definitely killing you.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 10:56 AM on March 28, 2012 [117 favorites]


The mentality of your generation just boggles my mind

Right back at you.
posted by wikipedia brown boy detective at 10:56 AM on March 28, 2012 [13 favorites]


I didn’t watch it all, but I was just thinking the kid’s an ass for putting this video up. Somehow he has a really expensive amp, but not his own place to live, and he wants to publicly humiliate his mom.

Yeah, how dare he explain why he doesn't have a new video up by showing what kept him from putting together a new video to put up. He is clearly the one who is an ass in this situation.

Also, would you like to explain how him owning something nice but still living with his parents at seventeen factors into this at all?
posted by IAmUnaware at 10:58 AM on March 28, 2012 [14 favorites]


Somehow he has a really expensive amp, but not his own place to live,

Um...there's all kinds of ways someone can own a piece of gear that costs $2000 without having sufficient income to get their own apartment (at age 17). Do we think that every kid who owns, say, $2000 worth of computer gear is a miserable leech if they don't live independently?

And that's leaving aside scenarios where the amp is a gift, or on loan from a better-off friend or whatever.
posted by yoink at 10:59 AM on March 28, 2012 [5 favorites]


Somehow he has a really expensive amp, but not his own place to live

Please share with us the aggregate dollar value of personal possessions beyond which minor children should be kicked out and forced to fend for themselves, despite not being able to legally sign a lease. And could you let us know whether we should be considering depreciation, or is it more a replacement-cost kind of thing?
posted by enn at 10:59 AM on March 28, 2012 [52 favorites]


I was super lucky to have had parents who were really patient with my (sometimes really loud) music endeavors. Especially considering how awful I sounded starting out. Especially since it's starting to lead a career.

Putting this video online was a smart, smart move. The best of luck to this guy.
posted by dunkadunc at 10:59 AM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


grey flannel suit
posted by The Whelk at 11:00 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


This video is like the guy who wanders through the village with his cart, yelling "Bring out your issues! Bring out your issues!"
posted by bicyclefish at 11:01 AM on March 28, 2012 [23 favorites]


so, so thankful for my artist mom who was profoundly disappointed when I opted for university instead of art school.
(she knew best. I found my way back.)
posted by changeling at 11:01 AM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


He's probably the first 17 year old in history to be kind of a dick.

She's probably the first mom in history to get angry at her kid for kind of silly reasons and yell about no going anywhere with his life.
posted by Plutor at 11:01 AM on March 28, 2012 [10 favorites]


My potential musical career was torpedoed before it left the dock by too many dismissive "you'll never make it in music" comments from my family,

Yeah, me too. No, wait, it was because I sucked and didn't practice enough. But that's almost the same, right?
posted by yoink at 11:01 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


My point being that he is doing pretty good, he has nice things and a place to live that presumably came from his parents. That wan’t the important part, this is; That video didn’t appear by itself, he went out of his way to publicly humiliate his mom. He’s an ass.
posted by bongo_x at 11:03 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


life is short and there are always chores.

If you've got the time to kill, you should kill it - and enjoy the killing - because it is definitely killing you.


Quoted for beautiful, hard-earned truth.
posted by rahnefan at 11:06 AM on March 28, 2012 [9 favorites]


That video didn’t appear by itself, he went out of his way to publicly humiliate his mom. He’s an ass.

If by 'ass' you mean 'more courageous than I ever could've been at his age', I agree.
posted by oneswellfoop at 11:08 AM on March 28, 2012 [9 favorites]


I just want to give him a hug and tell him it gets better.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 11:08 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


And to chime in with many others, for all the shitty cultural-not-getting-it my mother did when I was a teenager, she always supported my artistic endeavors. Which, in hindsight, was a little bit surprising. Makes me feel a little guilty for not working harder, actually.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:09 AM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


My favourite parts of these sorts of harangues are how they never make the haranguers feel any better.

On the contrary, it serves to wind them up even more, until we have a sort of dance of doors opening and closing with a chorus of long run-on declarative statements and rhetorical questions punctuated by alternating periods of silence and near-ritualized repetitive sentence fragments.
posted by clvrmnky at 11:09 AM on March 28, 2012 [23 favorites]


It is true that computer games are sucking the brains out of teenagers. When I was a kid, we wouldn't get yelled at home, because we were never there....we used to get yelled at for doing nothing on street corners.
posted by eggtooth at 11:10 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


he went out of his way to publicly humiliate his mom

He seems to work pretty hard at keeping his IRL id out of the videos (you don't see his face in any of them that I've looked at, and you don't see his mom's face in this vid). He doesn't post a name or address or anything identifying on this. I would guess that people who know him personally already know that his mom's like this. I agree that it's a dicey sort of thing to do, but it's not quite "going out of your way to publicly humiliate your mom." The fact that the video has gone viral is probably something he couldn't have foreseen; and it's really the only thing that makes anything like "public humiliation" for the mother at all likely.
posted by yoink at 11:10 AM on March 28, 2012 [5 favorites]


otoh!
posted by kliuless at 11:11 AM on March 28, 2012


On the contrary, it serves to wind them up even more, until we have a sort of dance of doors opening and closing with a chorus of long run-on declarative statements and rhetorical questions punctuated by alternating periods of silence and near-ritualized repetitive sentence fragments.

Ah yes, the Naked Frustration Loop, the issues at hand are too big to actually talk about so it just loops in on itself until you're just shouting WORDS! AND FRAGMENTS!
posted by The Whelk at 11:11 AM on March 28, 2012


I figured he was actually posting it to the internet as a reality check. To see whether or not the internet would side with him or with her. Like, it is his mom still. She might be right, better offer it to the internet tribunal to decide. Like when your joint hurts when you move it so you move it to make sure it hurts, but then, for this kid's case, it didn't!
posted by TwelveTwo at 11:11 AM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


This is what I thought of. Especially the part at the end.
posted by Glomar response at 11:15 AM on March 28, 2012


There is a right way and a wrong way to have "There's more to life than this room and your guitar. You need to develop a more diverse skillset if you want to survive out there in the world" conversation. This is the wrong way to have that discussion.
posted by echolalia67 at 11:15 AM on March 28, 2012 [13 favorites]


You know I hate to say it, and I hate to admit what a dick I was as a teen, but sometimes people need to be reminded of what they say in the heat of the moment cause they can and will disavow knowledge of said harangue unless you, say own a portable recorder and then transcribe it and then ask them to clarify their positions and argument so you really understand what they are trying to convey not that I did anything like that at all that would be smug and pointless and kinda mean but boy I bet it feels good to have independent verification that it's not you who are being the crazy person at that particular time....tho you be crazy for going to these lengths.....again, hypothetically speaking.
posted by The Whelk at 11:16 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


My point being that he is doing pretty good, he has nice things and a place to live that presumably came from his parents.

Well, certainly I think we can all agree that only poor, neglected, or homeless teenagers have any right to complain about how they are being treated by their parents.
posted by en forme de poire at 11:17 AM on March 28, 2012 [7 favorites]


I just want to give him a hug and tell him it gets better.

And I just want to strangle anyone repeating this contentless New Age rubbish, because it doesn't. It doesn't get better if you work hard and live independently and just wait four more years.

It gets better if you have opportunities to grow as a person and improve your situation in life, ways to pursue your passions and refine your talents, some arrangement that allows a comfortable lifestyle and people who support your interests and your outlook on life. Those are things you need to grow into a healthy, happy human being.
posted by byanyothername at 11:17 AM on March 28, 2012 [15 favorites]


(you don't see his face in any of them that I've looked at, and you don't see his mom's face in this vid)

That’s because he was filming a demo video. He didn’t want to move the camera or let his mom know he was filming. That’s also why (in the part I watched) he doesn’t really say anything, he doesn’t want to look bad, he’s trying to make her look bad because he knows there’s a camera running and she doesn’t.

I find that people seem to accept video as if it’s a movie, that we’re magically experiencing the real story and real life without taking into consideration how and why we’re seeing what we’re seeing.
posted by bongo_x at 11:18 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


"The guitar's alright as a hobby John, but you'll never make a living out of it."

"...because t-shirts sales are where the real money is at!"
posted by malocchio at 11:19 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


Mike's reflection in the speaker is very creepy.
posted by Flood at 11:21 AM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Well, certainly I think we can all agree that only poor, neglected, or homeless teenagers have any right to complain about how they are being treated by their parents.

I’m talking about the form his "complaint" took, not the complaint, which seems totally valid and totally ordinary.
posted by bongo_x at 11:21 AM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


This is just SCREAMING for a dance remix a la "you and the Little Mermaid can go fuck yourselves G'BYEEEEEE."
posted by Madamina at 11:22 AM on March 28, 2012 [6 favorites]


That’s because he was filming a demo video. He didn’t want to move the camera or let his mom know he was filming.

He's got a whole YouTube channel full of vids. I've looked through a bunch of them and never saw his face. My point is that the claim that he's going "out of his way" to "publicly humiliate" his mother kinda falls on its face when you consider that he had no way of knowing that the video would ever be seen by more than a small group of people amongst whom those who knew his mother already knew she was like this and those who didn't know his mother wouldn't be able to identify her from the video. Going "out of your way" to "publicly humiliate" someone would normally involve identifying them and seeking to get the "humiliating" material to the people who know them--there's no evidence here that he tried to do either of those things.
posted by yoink at 11:25 AM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


That’s also why (in the part I watched) he doesn’t really say anything, he doesn’t want to look bad, he’s trying to make her look bad because he knows there’s a camera running and she doesn’t.

It's also entirely possible that his mother has crazy rants and his best strategy for dealing with them is "shut up and let her run out of steam"
posted by wikipedia brown boy detective at 11:25 AM on March 28, 2012 [10 favorites]


It doesn't get better if you work hard and live independently and just wait four more years.

What in the holy living fuck are you talking about?
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 11:27 AM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


My dad's yelling at me in a similar manner when I was a teen only caused me to get into weirder and weirder and weirder music. It wasn't long before I was 18 and playing hour-long electronic noise sets at full volume in front of decent sized crowds. I remember during one show closing my eyes and picturing that the audience was made up of 100 clones of my Dad. I released more angst that night than I probably have in the last 10 years combined, if there's a way to measure such a thing.

Thanks, Dad.
posted by item at 11:27 AM on March 28, 2012 [18 favorites]


his best strategy for dealing with them is "shut up and let her run out of steam"

This is basically the best response to any ranting, angry person. Asking, "are you done?" at the end tends to make them more angry, though, so maybe save that for special occasions.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:28 AM on March 28, 2012 [11 favorites]


I totally didn't turn out an artsy person, but I know my mother would have loved and supported me if I did. For that I'm grateful.
posted by Apropos of Something at 11:29 AM on March 28, 2012


It doesn't get better if you work hard and live independently and just wait four more years.

What in the holy living fuck are you talking about?


Now now, not every thread here has to be about the presidency.
posted by TwelveTwo at 11:29 AM on March 28, 2012 [6 favorites]


As we all know, people aged 40 and over have spent their lives molding a prosperous, caring, thoughtful American society that teenagers are presently ruining by playing their guitars.
posted by dixiecupdrinking at 11:31 AM on March 28, 2012 [38 favorites]


Dude's got a 7 string. I don't care what kind of music he plays or how good he is...that right there makes him a douche.
posted by rocket88 at 11:32 AM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


Metafilter: Now now, not every thread here has to be about the presidency.
posted by gusandrews at 11:32 AM on March 28, 2012


And as to the mother's question "In what way is your life contributing to society," it appears as though the answer is that he is making instructional videos teaching others how to operate complicated audio equipment and sharing that knowledge for free to others. I do wonder in what way the mother's life is contributing to society

Perhaps she's subsidizing instructional videos teaching others how to operate complicated audio equipment and sharing that knowledge for free to others. Along with the rest of the nonsense moms do.
posted by 2N2222 at 11:35 AM on March 28, 2012 [7 favorites]


Seeing this posted immediately above the post on The Who video made chuckle. The mom's tone, not so much.

I suspect "in Michigan" is where the teen spends time with his divorced father, but that's purely speculative.
posted by joe lisboa at 11:36 AM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


That's when I realized that 'favorites are bookmarks' also applied for youtube.

p.s. I put ten bucks down on autotune version of this breaking by Monday.
posted by herbplarfegan at 11:36 AM on March 28, 2012


rocket88: "Dude's got a 7 string. I don't care what kind of music he plays or how good he is...that right there makes him a douche."

:(
posted by vanar sena at 11:38 AM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


This is just SCREAMING for a dance remix a la "you and the Little Mermaid can go fuck yourselves G'BYEEEEEE."

As I sit here laughing into my bag of chips and trying to keep it quiet so as not to bother my office-mate, I thank you.
posted by six-or-six-thirty at 11:39 AM on March 28, 2012


I take some comfort knowing that while I am indeed a douche, I'm not as much of a douche as the guys with 8-string guitars. Haha! Saved by the pecking order.
posted by vanar sena at 11:40 AM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


vanar sena: :(

And everyone in thread turns their heads toward vanar sena, hissssssing!
posted by TwelveTwo at 11:41 AM on March 28, 2012


no! you posted a second post
ruining everything

my life's work

was that one comment

woe
posted by TwelveTwo at 11:41 AM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


billy collins has something to say...
posted by kliuless at 11:42 AM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


"Shit mom, guess you should have raised me better. Can I finish my video now?"
posted by Uther Bentrazor at 11:45 AM on March 28, 2012


TwelveTwo: "no! you posted a second post
ruining everything
"

Dude, I'm a douche. The kind of style and grace you're expecting only comes from people who play an iktar.
posted by vanar sena at 11:51 AM on March 28, 2012


I was thinking he was Michigan student. Home for a break?
posted by littlemanclan at 11:51 AM on March 28, 2012


Am I the only person who asks myself this question every day?
posted by lon_star at 11:52 AM on March 28, 2012


WHY AREN'T YOU DEVELOPING ANY STUPID SOCIAL SKILLS?!?!?!?
posted by fleacircus at 12:03 PM on March 28, 2012 [6 favorites]


ion: nope
posted by rebent at 12:05 PM on March 28, 2012


I didn't think moms were still like this. Aren't they all my age now? 40s? This seems plucked from another era. Although, I suppose, bad parenting is timeless?

Yeah, this is weirdly reminiscent of my own teen years, spent fooling around with a guitar (although admittedly I did not own a 100-watt amp until after I moved out). The vertigo-inducing part of all this is the realization that I am probably older than the mother in the video, and I have a sweetly musical teenager at home upon whom I have never unloaded as much bile in her entire life as the mother does in 2:53 here.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 12:13 PM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


Dear Son,

I do not value your happiness.

Love, Mom
posted by LogicalDash at 12:20 PM on March 28, 2012 [12 favorites]


Huh. I've been the kid who constantly plays loud electric guitar in his room for years of high school. I've also been on the receiving end of a mom's "what are you going to do with your life?" rants (which, frankly, were justified). For the most part, my parents strongly supported my musical endeavors. But they also, fortunately, pushed me to develop a life beyond that guitar and amp.

But even with all that common ground between me and this guy, all I can think watching this and his other videos is that he has a ton of incredibly expensive guitar gear that I can't even afford now as an attorney. OK, that's not the only thing I can think. I can also think that he's wasting his time getting proficient at that style of guitar playing if he wants to make a decent living with music. He ought to be branching out and developing more marketable skills.

And seriously, that Gibson reverse Flying V on the stand behind him in the other videos? Come on, man, you're just burning piles of money to make the rest of us feel bad!
posted by The World Famous at 12:22 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


I released more angst that night than I probably have in the last 10 years combined, if there's a way to measure such a thing.

I believe it's measured in angstroms.
posted by Greg Nog at 12:24 PM on March 28, 2012 [43 favorites]


Man, my wife's grandfather was a noted jazz pianist in Montreal during an era when that was a shit-hot thing to be (everyone in the family's got a picture on their wall of Grampa at the keys with Frank Sinatra leaning over his shoulder), and so when my daughter was born, I had only one stupid living-through-my-kids wish: That she'd inherit that musical gift.

We bought her a toy piano, drums, a tambourine. If she'd showed the slightest inclination or serious interest, I'd have bought her a guitar, a horn, anything. Alas, nope. Finally, at seven, she's learned the Star Wars Imperial march on the piano and Ode to Joy on her recorder, mainly because her best buddy across the street is in music lessons and my daughter's so damn competitive. But her two-year-old brother loves the piano, plinks away at it all the time, so it was a sound investment and maybe it'll bring back the ghost of Grampa Jack yet.

I want this stuff for my kids because I'm a professional communicator with words, and there's probably no one I envy more for their ability to communicate directly and immediately and intensely with people than musicians. Even a damn good novel's barely worth as much as just the right chord change (or so it can sometimes seem from this side of the creative fence).

So fuck this lady's whole worldview, you know?
posted by gompa at 12:26 PM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


Wow, I had an entire band's worth of equipment in my bedroom during high school, and I can thankfully say that neither of my parents even came upstairs, let alone harangued me/us for likely annoying them, especially while practicing our cover of Tool's "Sober" submitted in video form for the high school talent show...to which we sadly weren't invited. Perhaps we should have harangued ourselves for the choice, since it wasn't exactly our style of music. We also did a Pumpkins cover, and a rockin' take on Radioactivity, along with some fledgling originals that never really grew wings. The point is that we spent a lot of time noodling, tuning and ::gasp:: having fun on our journey through hell high school. Perhaps the guy in the video is in college, but as someone who works on a college campus now, I can't visually observe much of a difference between it and senior year of high school.

I was supposedly the rhythm guitar player in the band, but spent most of the non-band-practice time slaying the drumset, playing along to the Foo Fighters' first album, Weezer's first album and a bunch of other no-nonsense rock and or roll, very loudly. The drums stuck as my instrument, and the set I play these days has traveled from my bedroom (two hours away, 15 years hence) to my friends' basement here in Urbana. Perhaps the best part of all this is that my bandmates are husband and wife, and they initially purchased the drumset for their then-6 year old son (who's now 9 and seriously rocks the beat). Occasionally, their four-year old daughter insists that we stop what we're doing and pass the mic so she can sing Kimya Dawson's Alphabutt song. So, no I don't see either of these kids' mom (the bass player) criticizing them for being libertines.

As for myself...
posted by obscurator at 12:27 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Goddamn this video gave me PTSD. People who grew up with parents that supported and fostered their artistic abilities and genuine interests are like alien beings to me. How does that work? I wish to observe your familial abodes at a safe distance.

I got versions of this talk - much harsher, really, I mean replace "what you're doing is stupid" with "you're stupid" most of the time - pretty much every week or more. And I was an A student with endless school extracurricular activities who studied my ass off and by all rights, should've been able to do whatever I wanted in my free time. And actually, even her questions to him seem like they come from an alien planet. I mean part of this mom's gist was "what do kids your age do? Aren't they out socializing and living life" and my mom would find that attitude to be awful, tame parenting. Socializing? You're not allowed to leave the house until you read through and memorize your entire chemistry textbook tonight. Forget friends. You can have friends when you're an adult.

Now I'm an adult and well I'm pretty fucked up but I play music and write things and go socialize with people and do whatever the hell I want and it feels pretty good.
posted by naju at 12:33 PM on March 28, 2012 [13 favorites]


Well, he should leave home and stop leeching off his parents. All kids should. Otherwise they have no right to complain when their parents get pissy at them for slacking around. Seriously. Get a shitty little job, rent a shitty little room and get out from under your parents' feet. Or at least do the housework for them once in a while.

Not to mention all the time he spends playing on their lovingly manicured lawn!
posted by Aizkolari at 12:36 PM on March 28, 2012


And as to the mother's question "In what way is your life contributing to society," it appears as though the answer is that he is making instructional videos teaching others how to operate complicated audio equipment and sharing that knowledge for free to others. I do wonder in what way the mother's life is contributing to society, perhaps she is voting against Obama or listening to talk radio all day or performing other such noble acts.

Jesus wept.

Ain't no mob like a mefi mob because a mefi mob pretends like their superior to reddit.
posted by Snyder at 12:42 PM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


Mom's voice sounds of age, cigarettes and bitterness. "Sit around the house all day," is an old, abusive-parent chestnut, isn't it? Get a haircut! Get a job!

Sadly though, this might have been avoided by using a pair of fucking headphones (said as someone who uses fucking headphones because his 3 y/o is watching Sprout and hates interruptions AND WHY IS SHE WASTING HER LIFE WATCHING SUPERWHY INSTEAD OF DOING SOMETHING FOR THE BENEFIT OF SOCIETY LIKE FORMING A TODDLER SUPERGROUP?!?!?)
posted by Ogre Lawless at 12:43 PM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


I assume that in due time this kid go to college, become mired in debt, graduate, desperately look for work, scrape by in an entry level job for two to three years, go to graduate school, become mired more deeply in debt, get married, have kids, and spend the rest of his life working some middle-management job paying off his student loans and/or saving money for his kids to go to college. Just like the rest of us. To help society.

Let him play the fucking guitar.
posted by dixiecupdrinking at 12:47 PM on March 28, 2012 [14 favorites]


This is the wrong way to have that discussion.


This woman is just one of many terrified people who realize way too late that parenting is a minefield that can't be crossed with old tactics. The teen years are the final blast. Many (most?) parents don't make it across. Maybe it will only change when we all stop in our tracks and really learn how to talk to kids and - more importantly - how to listen.

In fact, maybe this mother should be strapped to a chair with a gag for a day of just listening and watching and *being* in this boy's world. It is preposterous to expect the child to be able to interpret his world himself; he doesn't even know his own language yet.
posted by Surfurrus at 12:51 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


*sigh* I feel sick for that kid.
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 12:51 PM on March 28, 2012


Why did Jesus weep? I don't get it. I'm just saying that it seems like the kid is actually being productive. The dig on the mom is a little speculative, I agree.
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 1:02 PM on March 28, 2012


Also, it should be "they're superior." :)
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 1:04 PM on March 28, 2012


I assume that in due time this kid go to college, become mired in debt, graduate, desperately look for work, scrape by in an entry level job for two to three years, go to graduate school, become mired more deeply in debt, get married, have kids, and spend the rest of his life working some middle-management job paying off his student loans and/or saving money for his kids to go to college. Just like the rest of us. To help society.

This is completely ridiculous. There aren't any middle-management jobs.
posted by The Whelk at 1:07 PM on March 28, 2012 [10 favorites]


Ouch.

That kinda hurt to watch.

I flashed back to a certain Christmas morning when I was in my late teens and I unwrapped a present from mom and dad that was a sketch of a hobo complete with bindle and ragged trousers and the words "I made mine as a WRITER!" coming out of his mouth and mom and dad laughed and laughed like it was the funniest thing ever, wanting to be a writer, imagine, how silly.

Something broke inside me that day.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 1:08 PM on March 28, 2012 [51 favorites]


Relevant Mr. Show Sketch... Well, at least first 2 minutes.
posted by Godwin Interjection at 1:12 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


bongo_x: "That video didn’t appear by itself, he went out of his way to publicly humiliate his mom."

Then she shouldn't have said those things. All the more power to him.
posted by dunkadunc at 1:18 PM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


Did his mom learn nothing from MTV in the 80s ?
posted by Liquidwolf at 1:21 PM on March 28, 2012


OK, that's not the only thing I can think. I can also think that he's wasting his time getting proficient at that style of guitar playing if he wants to make a decent living with music.

What do you mean by a decent living, though? Does it count if you walk dogs for people on Craigslist to make ends meet? (Also, genuinely curious, what are these relatively lucrative genres you're talking about?)
posted by en forme de poire at 1:30 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


My point being that he is doing pretty good, he has nice things and a place to live that presumably came from his parents.

Amazingly enough, even kids with nice things - even the fabulously well-to-do! - are not quite completely insulated from emotional abuse. Even the most expensive gear, arranged on bedroom tile made of pure rhino horn, fails to fully deflect a parent's scorn and contempt. I've even heard that on occasion children with almost nothing in the way of material possessions have happy childhoods, though I'm reasonably sure that's socialist propaganda.

Believe it or not, you can't buy someone's gratitude. You have to earn it.
posted by gompa at 1:34 PM on March 28, 2012 [6 favorites]


Wow. My folks always supported me unconditionally regardless of whatever crazy thing I did (move to NYC after a crazy weekend visit! elope in Scotland! quit my job and start a business!). At worst, my mom is still a little disappointed in me because I didn't become a novelist, find a tumbledown lighthouse/cottage/barn to fix up and live in a la Tasha Tudor, marry the handyman, have a mad little bunch of barefoot bohemian kids, and cheerfully skirt poverty through luck and pluck. I'm so lucky to have gotten the parents I got. The kid's talented.
posted by mochapickle at 1:36 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Let him play the fucking guitar.

I agree because jazz is much too crazy, he can play it when he's old and he's to young for the blues. That's right. You know the rest of it. He's so young. Mama, let him play.
posted by Zack_Replica at 1:43 PM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


Then she shouldn't have said those things. All the more power to him.

I’m not defending her. She’s pretty obnoxious. I don’t think that excuses him. The fault I find with him is uploading, that’s it. And it’s a pretty big deal.

This is not a movie where he is the sympathetic lead. This is not even real life "OMG caught on tape". We are not watching the playing out of actual events. This is not the Texas judge beating his kid, where they felt it had to come out to save themselves. This is someone setting someone else up to look bad. Their mother. To the entire world.

This is me secretly filming our sex and uploading it because you’re so awful in bed and I want some validation and maybe a little revenge. Or secretly filming my meeting with my boss where he turned down my raise for no good reason because he’s a jerk, and see how he talks to me? Except you don’t know whether I’m actually the world’s worst employee or not, because I know the camera is on and he doesn’t. I’m on my best behavior in the video, but did I just do something that screwed up his life?

I was this kid, with a lot less money and apparently more supportive parents, but they did say similar things and we did fight, and there was yelling. And I had a career in music and they are wonderful and we love each other. But I have to wonder how different that would be if I’d pulled a stunt like this.

I have no idea what that kid is like, or what really happens there, and can’t assume anything based on this video except that his mother should probably lay off. And he made an asshole move.
posted by bongo_x at 1:45 PM on March 28, 2012 [4 favorites]


I think it was Bruce Springsteen who said, "My old man thought everything I owned was manufactured by The Goddamn Corporation. Goddamn radio, goddamn guitar..."
posted by R. Mutt at 1:46 PM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


What do you mean by a decent living, though? Does it count if you walk dogs for people on Craigslist to make ends meet? (Also, genuinely curious, what are these relatively lucrative genres you're talking about?)

Professional musicians exist. Most of them teach music lessons rather than walk dogs. Seriously, you can make ends meet as a musician, you might not ever get rich, but it's doable. You can also make ends meet as a writer, an sculptor, a painter, etc. It's not for everyone, but what career is?
posted by Gygesringtone at 2:02 PM on March 28, 2012


Doleful Creature, the Teenage Years:


Age 14:
Mom: I have found this dark poem you wrote, and this disturbing drawing of a demon
Me: Hey, that's my private stuff!
Mom: Are you worshipping Satan
Me: No, I've just been listening to a lot of Type O Negative
Mom: I am really frightened for you

Age 15:
Mom: so, you're in to [air quotes]punk[/air quotes] music now?
Me: Um, sure?
Mom: That is terrible. Why do you have to be like that? WELP I'M GOING TO CONVENIENTLY LOSE YOUR BAD RELIGION TSHIRT IN THE WASH

Age 16:
Me: I've given up punk (for the most part). I'm really into Mahler now!
Mom: UGH I HATE MAHLER
Me: See you later I'm off to music theory study group
Mom: What are you doing there! Are you having sex with girls
Me: No, we usualy end up singing show tunes
Mom: OH SO NOW YOU'RE GAY?!

Age 17
Me: My friend let me borrow his copy of Cakewalk and I have written a string quartet. Let me play it for you on through our Soundblaster 16-powered computer speakers.
Mom: This sounds like a video game it's not very good
Me: I am also now really into Thelonius Monk and Charle Mingus
Mom: even worse! Why can't you be normal
Dad: Son I am really disappointed that you quit going to Boy Scouts
Me: Yes Father but see I'm in all these orchestras and choirs and drama groups and a rock band and I have loads of nerdy friends like me and I'm really good with computers and I have a music scholarship
Parents: WE CONCEDE BUT WE ARE STILL DISAPPOINTED THAT YOU HAVEN'T SIGNED UP FOR ARMY

I have always been a vague disappointment to my parents. Even when I did something really cool like get commissioned to write a piece for a local ballet company at the age of 17 my parents we're like "meh, don't get a big head". And now I'm a parent with kids of my own and they wonder why I don't tell them all about every little creative thing I'm doing.

I swear on the blood of a thousand ancestral bagpipers that my sons will never go through that.
posted by Doleful Creature at 2:04 PM on March 28, 2012 [35 favorites]


The fault I find with him is uploading, that’s it. And it’s a pretty big deal.

So nobody can share their experiences because it might make the other people involved look bad ?

What if he told us about what she said, would that also be bad ?

That seems.... stupid.

I mean, I agree that in a just and honest world, he would have had a nice sit down chat with his mother and sang Kumbaya and talked about their feelings. I don't think she's fostered the sort of relationship that encourages that sort of honesty and interaction. I think he's stuck looking for support elsewhere, and that's problematic, but at least he's finding it.

Also, it's worth pointing out that at the end of the video, he states that there was more, but he clipped it so as to not make her look too bad.

But, look. His mother needs to come to grips with the fact that her son is an adult now, in deed if not in word, and she needs to learn to relate to him as such. I hope that she doesn't interact with her co-workers, friends, and other peers in that way.

But maybe she does. I've certainly known people like that.

Anyway, she's the adult. Why doesn't she grow up ?
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 2:07 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Too bad, Mr. Doleful Creature, the world needs problems.
posted by TwelveTwo at 2:08 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


I swear on the blood of a thousand ancestral bagpipers

This is my new favorite oath.
posted by mstokes650 at 2:11 PM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


Gygesringtone, yeah, that's sort of what I was getting at. (I picked dog-walking because it's the side job of one of my friends who's a more "niche" touring musician who is, as far as I know, financially solvent.)

I have no idea what that kid is like, or what really happens there, and can’t assume anything based on this video except that his mother should probably lay off.

Isn't that the main point of the video?
posted by en forme de poire at 2:19 PM on March 28, 2012


bongo_x: "I’m not defending her. She’s pretty obnoxious. I don’t think that excuses him. The fault I find with him is uploading, that’s it. And it’s a pretty big deal."

I've been involved in various nonprofits where members of management have sent me really bizarre, angry emails where they've acted really unprofessional (once because I had the audacity to set up an unofficial volunteer email listserv! the horror. It had been six years and they were still dragging their feet).
So what do I do when I write my reply? I include absolutely everyone. Because light needs to be shone upon shitty behavior by people in power.

Somehow, some people thought the reply-all was a big faux-pas, because I should have "worked things out" with said Management Figure. Fuck that. He would never have been shown for the horses' ass he was, would not have backed down, and I would have been quietly gotten rid of because nobody would have known what was going on. By making things public, I protected myself.
posted by dunkadunc at 2:20 PM on March 28, 2012 [8 favorites]


I guess first I'll need to ask what you mean when you say "kids".
posted by pts at 6:34 PM on March 28


Fair point; that was lazy of me. I mean young people who have finished school.
posted by Decani at 2:27 PM on March 28, 2012


Gygesringtone, yeah, that's sort of what I was getting at.

Sorry, my reading comprehension is a bit lower than usual today.
posted by Gygesringtone at 2:28 PM on March 28, 2012


-Pogo_Fuzzybutt -
-dunkadunc-

You have good points, I just think it was a move that will probably not make his life better, and may haunt him. But who knows?

I don’t really find any of that all that interesting, the part I think is interesting is how people react to the video.
posted by bongo_x at 2:28 PM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


BitterOldPunk Your comment made me so sad.

My parents gave me the permission to use my dad's account at the hardware store when I was 13. Then at his Art store when I moved into the city at 18.
That support was vital to me becoming an adult.
posted by asavage at 2:33 PM on March 28, 2012 [24 favorites]


Do we think that every kid who owns, say, $2000 worth of computer gear is a miserable leech if they don't live independently?

Not that it matters much, but the reason people think that’s interesting is that a $2000 amp is not like $2000 worth of computer gear, it’s like a $2000 video card or monitor, something most people will never have, not even some professionals. There was much more gear than that going on.
posted by bongo_x at 2:33 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


What in the holy living fuck are you talking about?

Sorry. I had to write quickly, and my grar isn't directed at you. It's directed at the three little words "it gets better," because it's a cliched phrase people throw at high school kids in bad situations and it kind of encapsulates a few ideas in US culture I totally hate and which I don't even want to unpack now.

I feel pretty shitty about commenting at all today; sorry.
posted by byanyothername at 2:45 PM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


And seriously, that Gibson reverse Flying V on the stand behind him in the other videos? Come on, man, you're just burning piles of money to make the rest of us feel bad!

Wait, he has a lawn dart? I didn't think Gibson would sell any of those things.
posted by InfidelZombie at 2:49 PM on March 28, 2012


Wait, he has a lawn dart? I didn't think Gibson would sell any of those things.

Apparently there are some kids who already have a PRS singlecut and a 7-string EB and a rack full of outboard gear for their quintuple rectifier compresso-shred rig and still have more money left over than sense.
posted by The World Famous at 2:52 PM on March 28, 2012


Dude's got a 7 string. I don't care what kind of music he plays or how good he is...that right there makes him a douche.

i have TWO 7 strings now - so i guess i'm a double douche

no

i've got one of them downtuned to open g - that makes me a low-down double douche
posted by pyramid termite at 3:05 PM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


i've got one of them downtuned to open g - that makes me a low-down double douche

If you've got a 7-string guitar tuned to open g with two strings removed, you're my new guitar hero.
posted by The World Famous at 3:12 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


i'm REALLY old because THIS is obligatory
posted by pyramid termite at 3:16 PM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


If you've got a 7-string guitar tuned to open g with two strings removed, you're my new guitar hero.

well, i don't play the two top strings that much - i'll consider it

i disagree with keith, anyway - i keep the 6th string on my open g tele
posted by pyramid termite at 3:20 PM on March 28, 2012


Yeah, I keep the 6th on when I do open G, too. I don't get how he plays Wild Horses in open G without a 6th string.
posted by The World Famous at 3:23 PM on March 28, 2012


Also I can't believe this hasn't posted yet.
posted by Doleful Creature at 3:31 PM on March 28, 2012


I wonder what the wiretap laws are in the state where he lives.
posted by crunchland at 3:32 PM on March 28, 2012


The mom always comes back in and says something else doesn't she? Every fucking time.
posted by holdkris99 at 3:32 PM on March 28, 2012 [2 favorites]


Your comment made me so sad

Achievement Unlocked: Made asavage sad

In fairness to my parents, I should add that the gift was given without any intended malice or desire to crush their son's dreams. They genuinely thought it was funny and were perplexed and dismayed that I didn't see it that way. Over the course of years I've realized that my ambition to write seemed utterly unrealistic to them, as if I'd declared my goals to be to fly by flapping my arms and to control the weather with my mind. They never met a writer. They rarely read books. My dad was a high-school dropout and my mom never went to college. The idea that their son wanted to WRITE for a LIVING was just beyond their capacity to absorb. Go to college and be an English teacher? Sure, they could grasp that. But to be a WRITER? That was something Other People did.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 3:33 PM on March 28, 2012 [7 favorites]


"When you punish a person for dreaming his dream
don't expect him to thank or forgive you
the best ever death metal band out of Denton
will in time both outpace and outlive you

Hail Satan
Hail Satan, tonight
Hail Satan
Hail, hail!"
posted by Philipschall at 3:34 PM on March 28, 2012 [14 favorites]


Hail, Hail!
posted by joe lisboa at 3:50 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Guys, kids NEED to have parents that are total dicks if they hope to make it as metal musicians. Do you think Black Sabbath's parents were all "Oh, you kids just make us so darn proud!"? Shit no, man!
posted by orme at 3:58 PM on March 28, 2012 [5 favorites]


Guys, kids NEED to have parents that are total dicks if they hope to make it as metal musicians. Do you think Black Sabbath's parents were all "Oh, you kids just make us so darn proud!"? Shit no, man!

I don't know, man. Have you seen Lars Ulrich's dad? I mean, Lars is a total dick, but his dad is totally like "oh, you kids just make us so darn proud!"
posted by The World Famous at 4:00 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


My dad would say "go shit in your hat shit in your hat because that's all you will ever make of your life."

And Springsteen never had a day job.
posted by pianomover at 4:02 PM on March 28, 2012


Have you seen Lars Ulrich's dad?

Oh, I'm sure dude's mom will also change her tune once he's raking in the millions.
posted by orme at 4:08 PM on March 28, 2012


Oh, I'm sure dude's mom will also change her tune once he's raking in the millions.

Meh. I'm sure she changes her tune fairly often as it is. She doesn't sound to me like a parent who is constantly going on about that stuff. There's really no question that there's more to the story than that single exchange, and I have no doubt that they have their happier times on a regular basis.
posted by The World Famous at 4:10 PM on March 28, 2012 [6 favorites]


Oh, I'm sure dude's mom will also change her tune once he's raking in the millions.

What makes you think he’s going to be a sleazy banker?
posted by bongo_x at 4:10 PM on March 28, 2012


Hooray for Mom! It worked! The kid is internet-famous now and I think he's been invited to a talk show already. Way to work the webs.
posted by snsranch at 4:25 PM on March 28, 2012


But if your sis is a (bitch), brother is a jerk
Leave 'em both alone and continue with your work
posted by Scoo at 4:59 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


He's 17 and living at home, and his main free time activity is playing the electric guitar and using technology she doesn't understand in a way that looks self-interested and masturbatory. Of course that's going to get on his mom's nerves. It's fucking supposed to.

I have no problem with him posting this - yeah, it's a bit of a dick move, but that whole conversation was painful to listen to. Being an adult has its drawbacks, but at least I don't have to have these sorts of painful, awkward, and completely ineffective "conversations" with my folks anymore. It's good to see shit like this from time to time so don't have these same conversations with my own kids.
posted by mosk at 5:28 PM on March 28, 2012


The mom always comes back in and says something else doesn't she? Every fucking time.

Thank you for that. You had me laughing all through my cardio workout.
posted by absentian at 5:34 PM on March 28, 2012


Every teenager has pulled this sulk-and-say-almost-nothing move while being berated by their parents. That said, was I the only one imagining all the brilliant, trenchant retorts and Odes To The Importance Of Music (and teaching it online!) that he COULDA said? Just let me inhabit your body for a second kid, I'll tell her what's what.
posted by mreleganza at 5:55 PM on March 28, 2012


In regards to him uploading this, his online communities are probably an important part of his support system. He may have had no other motivation for posting this other than to get a little sympathy from his friends.
posted by sarahw at 6:00 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Plate of angst beans.
posted by Burhanistan at 6:12 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Angst beans, angst beans, the acrid fruit, the more you mope the worse you cope!
posted by TwelveTwo at 6:19 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


so plate your beans with every meal and let the world know how you feel!
posted by pyramid termite at 6:38 PM on March 28, 2012


terrible!
posted by TwelveTwo at 6:49 PM on March 28, 2012


Years ago, my neighbor's kids would spend hours every day practicing with their band in the garage, and yes, I often dearly wanted to throw the door open and scream and scream at them. (Although, to be fair, I wanted to scream, "IMPROVE, you damn kids, IMPROVE IF ONLY INCREMENTALLY!") Now that I'm a mom, I can understand her frustration, but I'm also hearing her transferring her own disappointment and fear onto her son. I'm sure I've done that too; my parents sure did, and on a regular basis. But man oh man, when I hear someone in my age cohort admonishing someone else about 'not making a contribution to society' or 'living a meaningless life', all I hear is 'MIDLIFE CRISIS AAARRRRGH'. I know teens can be difficult, but parents of teens... well, they can bring a lot of shit to the table too. It can be a hard time for everybody.

Anyway, I hope I remember this video next time I feel myself losing patience with my quirky, wonderful, creative son. And all the other wonderful quirky kids I come into contact with, including the ones with grating garage bands.
posted by biddeford at 7:00 PM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


"Ain't no mob like a mefi mob because a mefi mob pretends like their superior to reddit."
s/their/they're/
Just making sure your rule is proven correct.
posted by clvrmnky at 7:16 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Metafilter: IMPROVE, you damn kids, IMPROVE IF ONLY INCREMENTALLY!
posted by The Whelk at 7:27 PM on March 28, 2012 [8 favorites]


When I got my first serious job in New York City, working for a prestigious investment bank, my father worried that I'd get stuck into it and never get to be a musician.

If I could talk to my Dad in the afterlife, I'd say, "See, I never did get stuck and now I can do music full-time, I couldn't have done it without you."

Boy, do I miss my parents...
posted by lupus_yonderboy at 7:33 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


metafliter - where are your stupid friends? - are they sitting in their houses, playing on their computers all day long?
posted by pyramid termite at 7:38 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


Am I supposed to sympathize with the mom because I'm much closer in age and life circumstances to her than to the kid? Cause I don't.

Poor guy.
posted by edheil at 7:56 PM on March 28, 2012 [1 favorite]


If 33 year old me could talk to 15 year old me he'd say only a few words. "Don't be a dick to your mom, you're going to regret it one day."
posted by IvoShandor at 8:28 PM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


My dad would say "go shit in your hat shit in your hat because that's all you will ever make of your life."

My father would say QUICK GO DISTRACT YOUR MOTHER WHILE I REPAIR THIS THING WE JUST BLEW UP FOR SCIENCE.

he was rad.
posted by elizardbits at 8:50 PM on March 28, 2012 [5 favorites]


Damn. That's some weapons-grade bitterness there, Mom...
posted by fikri at 8:59 PM on March 28, 2012


Why did Jesus weep? I don't get it. I'm just saying that it seems like the kid is actually being productive. The dig on the mom is a little speculative, I agree.

It's more than a little speculative. The amount of projection and demonization in this thread is crazy! I took yours as a particularly egregious example. (Also, like a liberal mom couldn't or wouldn't say the same thing. Politics is not an indicator of parenting.) A lost of people are really eager to get up all in this mom's business based on one video put out on the internet by a pissed teenage son.
posted by Snyder at 9:11 PM on March 28, 2012 [3 favorites]


So if the equipment is rare and fancy and expensive (I don't know squat about it - I defer to those who do), and the kid is 17, then don't we have to conclude that someone is supporting him in his musical passion? I mean, there's really not that many independently wealthy 17-year-olds. I see this as a different point than "don't leech off your family and then complain about your mean ranty mom" - it's that a lone maternal rant doesn't reflect the overall environment of the kid's life or the context of his nascent musical career.
posted by gingerest at 12:09 AM on March 29, 2012 [2 favorites]


That kid totally stole all of the gear on display. You can tell by the body language reflected in the display. Yep.
posted by Burhanistan at 4:09 AM on March 29, 2012 [1 favorite]


It's more than a little speculative. The amount of projection and demonization in this thread is crazy! I took yours as a particularly egregious example. (Also, like a liberal mom couldn't or wouldn't say the same thing. Politics is not an indicator of parenting.)

Um, you really missed my point. But whatevs. I like how in your mind even the insinuation that someone is a conservative is somehow demonizing. Of course the mom could be liberal. I have no idea what political stripe she wears. I couldn't care less. And so, once again, Jesus wept. Oh, how he cried tears of Baby Jesus heartache! For some reason!
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 5:48 AM on March 29, 2012


Here, I'll go ahead and demonize the mom and make her a stoopid liberal instead:

"And as to the mother's question 'In what way is your life contributing to society,' it appears as though the answer is that he is making instructional videos teaching others how to operate complicated audio equipment and sharing that knowledge for free to others. I do wonder in what way the mother's life is contributing to society, perhaps she just signed an online petition to Free Mumia or eats only cage-free chicken eggs or constantly performs other such noble acts."

Does it make more sense now? Or, wait. Shit, I probably shouldn't have done that. Sorry, Jesus! Here are some Kleenex!
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 6:09 AM on March 29, 2012


You know "Jesus wept" is a mild oath along the lines of "goodness gracious," right?
posted by milk white peacock at 9:06 AM on March 29, 2012


Sorry, I don't see it that way. I picture Jesus sobbing next to a sheep, Biblical mascara running down his cheeks, slamming his fists into the dry earth of Nineveh. This is America and I have my rights!!
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 9:09 AM on March 29, 2012 [3 favorites]


My favorite verse of the bible is where it says "Jesus shat."
posted by symbioid at 9:11 AM on March 29, 2012


symbioid, I always remember that verse when I'm sitting on the shitter and look down at my WWJD bracelet. Right, he would shit! Let's do that!
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 9:12 AM on March 29, 2012 [1 favorite]


Another video where she overheats: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4mgAJ1plDUo
They're a bit visible in this one at 0:16.
posted by flif at 9:40 AM on March 29, 2012


He's got a JCM900 half stack, too? Come on!

Anyone who thinks they could live in a house where somebody regularly plays metal riffs through a cranked JCM900 on a regular basis and never freak out with rage about it is either clueless or self-delusional.
posted by The World Famous at 10:58 AM on March 29, 2012


If you've got the time to kill, you should kill it - and enjoy the killing - because it is definitely killing you.

Thanks Pogo_Fuzzybutt, I really did need to hear that.
posted by Hoenikker at 11:14 AM on March 29, 2012


is either clueless or self-delusional. -- My nephew is a pretty accomplished jazz saxaphonist, and he's gotten quite good at it. The only downside of his practicing 4-6 hours, every day, is that my brother and his wife feel like they're living an a 1940's film noir. I guess I could think of worse soundtracks to your life.
posted by crunchland at 11:26 AM on March 29, 2012 [1 favorite]


This is me secretly filming our sex and uploading it because you’re so awful in bed and I want some validation and maybe a little revenge.

This is a really weird analogy to use when talking about a boy secretly recording his mom berating him.
posted by Uther Bentrazor at 11:48 AM on March 29, 2012 [5 favorites]


This thread is really deviating from its true purpose (imho): MeFites commiserating over their unsupportive parents and bad childhoods, then feeling all jealous at MeFites who had kick-ass parents and awesome childhoods.
posted by Doleful Creature at 12:06 PM on March 29, 2012 [1 favorite]


What about us with unsupportive parents who had awesome childhoods?
posted by Burhanistan at 12:10 PM on March 29, 2012 [2 favorites]


This is a really weird analogy to use when talking about a boy secretly recording his mom berating him.

Weird or hot? Both?

I don’t really see how one analogy has to literally interact with another.
posted by bongo_x at 12:28 PM on March 29, 2012


GTFO BURHANISTAN WE CANNOT ABIDE SUCH REFUTATIONS
posted by Doleful Creature at 12:28 PM on March 29, 2012


The analogies don't have to be literally related, but I generally think of sex as something I engage in with trust, and being yelled at by my parents as a teenager for being a layabout who read too much as... something that was breaking my trust on a weekly basis.

And I love my parents, but there's a lot of abuse out there.
posted by stoneandstar at 2:02 PM on March 29, 2012


(I was so grateful as a kid that my great-grandmother gave us the movie adaptation of Matilda for Christmas, because once my dad realized he sounded like Danny Devito yelling "Whaddaya need a book for?" it would generally devolve into teasing and self-mockery instead of venting a stream of work-related stressors at his kids.)
posted by stoneandstar at 2:03 PM on March 29, 2012 [2 favorites]


He's got a JCM900 half stack, too?

i love digital amp sims, headphones and computer DAWs - i can rock out in my apartment, save money, make tracks and my neighbors never know ...
posted by pyramid termite at 7:43 PM on March 29, 2012


Ah, been there myself.

And you just know that, if you were frequently out with friends as she insists, then the rant would be about you going out all the time which wastes your life, while serious people of course stay in their rooms devoting major time to learning a difficult skill, such as mastering an instrument.

:)
posted by billb at 8:53 PM on March 29, 2012 [1 favorite]


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