AOL Releases Version 7.0

October 16, 2001 1:05 PM

AOL Releases Version 7.0 "Jeans make your ass look good. Calvin Klein makes it look better," said [AOL President] Sacks. "I think we have a deeper understanding of the interactive market than anyone." Anyone care to challenge that statement? Or validate it?
posted by espada (43 comments total)

I mean the comment about "understanding the interactive market", not the one about Calvin Klein. Or asses. But those are fair game too.
posted by espada at 1:06 PM on October 16, 2001

The sleaziest just got sleazier!
posted by crunchburger at 1:09 PM on October 16, 2001

AOL is evil. AOL is the devil. I find them worse than Microsoft. That said, they have created an interface that is marvelous in its simplicity. A lot of their membership comes through marketing and carpetbombing but they retain it because the damn thing is so easy to use. The other ISPs still haven't learned this, though MSN is getting better at it I think.
posted by owillis at 1:12 PM on October 16, 2001

"Jeans make your ass look good. Calvin Klein makes it look better,"

But asses with nothing on them look much better. And so it is with an ISP...
posted by ColdChef at 1:15 PM on October 16, 2001

Jeans make most people's asses look hideous.
posted by jfuller at 1:18 PM on October 16, 2001

They're absolute geniuses at giving Middle America what it wants, just as the National Enquirer and the Star are geniuses at giving Middle America what it wants. The difference is that AOL doesn't have contempt for its customers.

Those of us who work for online publications learn to worship at AOL's altar. If AOL directs traffic your way, you get millions of page views. If AOL ignores you, you're toast.

Does AOL have a deeper understanding of the interactive market than anyone? Take a look at the numbers.
posted by Holden at 1:29 PM on October 16, 2001

I agree about the simple interface bit. At the same time, though, I always get lost looking for stuff when I get stuck having to use AOL at someone's house. Weird.

Lucky Jeans. Is it that everyone who wears these has the same butt, or do the jeans themselves impart that butt upon them? They're all like...bulbous and about four inches higher than everyone else's. Discuss.
posted by Su at 1:32 PM on October 16, 2001

But asses with nothing on them look much better. And so it is with an ISP...

The nice ass is only accentuated and made to seem even nicer by the right clothing. I like my ISPs with good customer support and very little interruption of my connection.

One of the reasons that AOL keeps customers is that you can find a local access number just about anywhere in the US of A and use your account wherever and whenever. It's part of AOL's ease of use. That, and once you get used to AOL's newsgroups and mail interfaces and that type of thing, it takes some effort to learn how to do these things another way. I've been using Forte Agent forever for both email and newsgroups and it would be next to impossible for me to make myself use something else now. AOLers do not want to let go either.

Another reason that people stay with AOL is that it has a lot of message boards and other forums that people build pseudo-communities on and then they keep AOL for those communities. A long time ago the new user influx made me lose interest in AOL, as the three communities that I kept my account for were quickly overrun and became far less interesting. But I kept AOL for a long time after I had any real use for it, just because of those communities.
posted by bargle at 1:34 PM on October 16, 2001

I liked this thread better when it seemed like we were all talking about my ass.
posted by luser at 1:36 PM on October 16, 2001

Holden: If you think they don't have contempt, you've obviously never spoken to their tech support people in a non-work setting. I've known several. Oh, the stories.
I find it disturbing that AOL is so sure/determined their customers who escape will come back that they will reserve your user ID for a year, "just in case." They also save things like credit car numbers for at least that amount of time, and won't allow you to use them again for a new account. Found that out when my regular connection died for an extended period and I had no other alternative available. I don't like that kind of information laying about like that.
posted by Su at 1:37 PM on October 16, 2001

So what is this now, 3 *major* releases in this calendar year alone? AOL 5, 6 and 7 were all released in 2001, I believe. I think they are simply playing a numbers game in that their clientele probably equates the higher numbers with better products or advances. Kind of like the way Netscape jumped from 4 to 6. Can't release a product called Netscape 5 when your competitor has a product named MSIE 6 after all ;)

Every time I am forced to use AOL at someone's house, I connect and then I reduce the interface and use telnet for my e-mail and whatever other browser is on that machine.
posted by terrapin at 1:40 PM on October 16, 2001

"Sure I didn't have a condom, but who knew when I would be in Haiti again?"

Bad Idea Jeans
posted by machaus at 1:44 PM on October 16, 2001

It would take two threads to cover my ass....
posted by jpoulos at 1:46 PM on October 16, 2001

Those of us who work for online publications learn to worship at AOL's altar. If AOL directs traffic your way, you get millions of page views. If AOL ignores you, you're toast.

Substitute "book publishers" for "online publications" and "Oprah" for "AOL," and you have an interesting corollary. (Okay, substitute "book sales" for "page views" while you're at it.)

My gut instinct is there's a tremendous amount of Venn diagram overlap between the "AOL users" circle and "Oprah's audience" circle. Not that one leads directly to the other, but. . .I forgot where I was going with this. Oh, well. Nice ass, luser.
posted by arco at 1:50 PM on October 16, 2001

"I don't know the guy, but he needs a kidney and I have two so..."

Bad Idea Jeans

Everytime my girlfriend and I hear someone say something stupid (like..."Your father wants you to tell him over the phone how to upgrade his AOL browser to 7.0"), we look at each other and say, "Bad Idea Jeans." Glad to know I'm not the only one who remembers this.
posted by ColdChef at 2:08 PM on October 16, 2001

Those of us who work for online publications learn to worship at AOL's altar. If AOL directs traffic your way, you get millions of page views. If AOL ignores you, you're toast.

Perhaps this is true of some business or organizations, but it is certainly not true for everyone. I, for one, could do without the AOL people who e-mail me asking how to get Medicaid or Section 8 vouchers simply because they typed those words into a search engine and the site I maintain came up. That's tantamount to me typing Honda Civic into a search engine and asking the person behind the first site that pops up where I can buy floormats. I would guess that 90% of the "stupid questions" I receive are from AOL users.

If your target audience, customer, group etc is part of the AOL demographic, sure, then it is probably smart to target AOL's millions of users (although how many of those are active now, I wonder). But for a policy shop like the site I maintain to care about AOL's user base is silly. Most our target audience is researchers, professors, legislators, etc.
posted by terrapin at 2:13 PM on October 16, 2001

And you have a nice ass, arco.
Include in your Venn diagram people who watch "Seventh Heaven."
Since I don't watch "Seventh Heaven," read Oprah's recommended books or use AOL, what does that make me? An ungodly, elitist (only elitists use a non-AOL ISP, right?) freethinker who has the hubris to believe he can choose his own books? Or just ungodly?
posted by Holden at 2:15 PM on October 16, 2001

Terrapin:
Just 90 percent?
In my experience, I would peg that number at about 98 percent. Seriously. My favorites are the blank messages with no subject line. I get those only from AOL users.
I just chuckle and remember that AOL is my mom's ISP.
posted by Holden at 2:18 PM on October 16, 2001

Wait wait. Does this mean there's going to be more ass on AOL or what?
posted by fuq at 2:19 PM on October 16, 2001

Kind of like the way Netscape jumped from 4 to 6. Can't release a product called Netscape 5 when your competitor has a product named MSIE 6 after all ;)

netscape went from 4 to 6 because there was a netscape 5 in development, and it was completely scrapped in favor of the mozilla project, which became netscape 6.
posted by chrisege at 2:21 PM on October 16, 2001

AOL makes their customers look like an ass.
posted by websavvy at 2:24 PM on October 16, 2001

Does this mean we will get more AOL cds in the mail? I can't wait. Oh, and neither can my ass.
posted by chokersandwich at 2:34 PM on October 16, 2001

Bad Idea Jeans.
posted by luser at 2:37 PM on October 16, 2001

I disagree with some facets of owillis's claim that AOL is easy to use. I think that, yes, the lot of access numbers makes things easy, and some things are perceptually easier.

But on balance, AOL sells the perception of ease-of-use. When you buy a new computer, many times there are guided setup programs to get you up and running. I think back to my sister's experience with her then-new iMac: she was online in 11 minutes with EarthLink. So the ease of setup is marketing.

What about the interface? For the majority of folks, it's a nightmare. It breaks Windows conventions, it breaks Mac conventions - it doesn't play along with the rules. Particularly on the Windows side; a multiple-document interface is supposed to allow one to close a window at any time; try closing the "Welcome!" window in AOL. The thing is bent on ease-of-use without allowing customization. Either you work the way AOL works, or not. It's not supposed to be that way.

...But it's sold as easy, with the word "My" in front of every noun and verb one can imagine. AOL is sold as easy, the damned discs are everywhere, and now they own so much that you can't get away from them. So try those 1,000 hours for free! AOL makes it easy!
posted by hijinx at 2:39 PM on October 16, 2001

New from AOL: MyAss
posted by fuq at 3:13 PM on October 16, 2001

"Jeans make your ass look good. Calvin Klein makes it look better,"

Thus, AOL users are looking like better asses?
posted by jazon at 3:15 PM on October 16, 2001

"You've got ASS."
posted by jpoulos at 4:08 PM on October 16, 2001

I used AOL regularly for at least two years before I went to college, and on school breaks after that.... Because it had the only local number, and my parents paid for it. It was pretty much the only game in town until Earthlink and cable modems moved in.

But never again. The software was just too bloated... Who needs all that crap when you can have a browser and an IRC client that together take up half the space AOL does? And it ate my modem. Ate my modem!
posted by fujikosmurf at 4:56 PM on October 16, 2001

(has someone made an Ass OnLine joke yet?)
posted by arco at 5:08 PM on October 16, 2001

"You've got ASS."

oh shyt... i am SO bloggin' that. it's genius.

i'm still rocking aol 4.0, though i rarely use it. i don't have my own account, but several of my friends lend me there's, and it is outright THE best way to get anime to download (aside from getting a good FTP sharer.. but how often do you come across those?). i can see why else it's so popular, with the whole ease of use.. but you know, it's not even coming close to being as easy to use as RoadRunner (for me at least.). i mean, i don't even have to do anything because it just runs in the background. who needs all the other sub-par services aol offers?
posted by lotsofno at 5:44 PM on October 16, 2001

AOL is like duplo blocks for adults. Big enough so they can't swallow it all at once.
posted by andryeevna at 6:29 PM on October 16, 2001

AOL may not be cool, but, as I've said before, none of the other ISPs are materially cheaper; and I run IE 5.0 and Outlook Express for Mac over it. So, really, for the foreseeable future, I'll stick with it.
posted by ParisParamus at 6:43 PM on October 16, 2001

LOL Time Warner

(reprise)
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 9:26 PM on October 16, 2001

Speaking of chat rooms accounting for a great deal of AOL's market share -- oh, and speaking of ass, too -- three syllables: Gay-O-L

(not, ahem, that there's anything wrong with that)
posted by verdezza at 10:09 PM on October 16, 2001

Sophistication, thy name is this thread.
posted by hijinx at 6:27 AM on October 17, 2001

I fear the day when AOL and MSN merge.

Seriously, the biggest rips I've heard about AOL is that it's unsecure (Why? Proprietary protocol or something?) and that putting it on a machine tends, over time, to render that machine unworkable for anything else. I bailed on AOL back around version 5 or so, but up to then I seldom if ever had any system-related problems, and the only security issue I had to worry about was those damned kids who hoped I was stupid enough to give 'em my password.

I sincerely applaud their marketing efforts -- they've made me almost miss them. I really did enjoy making friends via chat, too, and I enjoyed the "Internet with training wheels" aspect of it for a while. But after a while I got a separate ISP and used AOL's "Bring Your Own Access" pricing plan until I weaned myself off.

They may, at some distant-future point, get me back, but only if market forces turn them into Hobson's choice. As long as there's a real ISP out there with a local access number and a competitive plan, I think I'll leave AOL alone.
posted by alumshubby at 7:08 AM on October 17, 2001

Setting up your own browser and email client gives you an interface much simpler than what aol offers.

I have no idea where the concept of aols 'ease of use' comes from. Their marketing of 'ease of use' and ability to have others believe it is quite astonishing.
posted by justgary at 8:01 AM on October 17, 2001

This thread is certainly fascinating. Who would have thought that Metafilter users could be so cheeky?
posted by clevershark at 8:49 AM on October 17, 2001

Comparing AOL to ass makes sense to me.
posted by Foosnark at 10:51 AM on October 17, 2001

Assholes Or Losers
posted by fuq at 12:32 PM on October 17, 2001

I remember pre-AOL 4, when they used to block hordes of common things that people do online. IRC was completely off limits, those connections were all blocked.

"Is there a reason I can't connect to IRC?"
"You can chat with others by clicking People Connection..."
"No no no. Why can't I get on IRC?"
"You can chat..."
*closes tech support applet*

AOL also used to modify the Windows logo in Internet Explorer, replacing it with the AOL logo.

My perspective of AOL's client side philosophy has always been that they want you to preceive them as the operating system for the internet. And that marketing strategy works, on millions.
posted by tomorama at 5:13 PM on October 17, 2001

ass out loud
posted by kliuless at 5:23 PM on October 17, 2001

AOL wont be mailing out any version 7.0 cds before they exhaust their stock pile of $39 million worth of AOL 6.0 cds.
posted by tamim at 7:33 AM on November 2, 2001