Thou shalt not disturb Alan Rickman whilst he drinks tea..

May 12, 2012 8:06 AM

Epic Tea Time with Alan Rickman [SLYT]
posted by quin (56 comments total)

Thats not how you make tea.
posted by The Whelk at 8:10 AM on May 12, 2012 [8 favorites]

Way too long!
posted by sadtomato at 8:12 AM on May 12, 2012 [1 favorite]

Needs more Muscles-Glasses.
posted by Rat Spatula at 8:16 AM on May 12, 2012 [1 favorite]

Oh, this is wonderful! What's the music?
posted by Greg Nog at 8:18 AM on May 12, 2012

Inception soundtrack, Dream Is Collapsing I think.
posted by The Whelk at 8:18 AM on May 12, 2012 [1 favorite]

Missed opportunity for an epic tasting of the tea.
posted by ceribus peribus at 8:21 AM on May 12, 2012

Way too long!

Not long enough!
posted by dobie at 8:26 AM on May 12, 2012 [5 favorites]

But.... he put the bag... in the water... the water was already... that's....

[see also]
posted by AbsoluteDestiny at 8:27 AM on May 12, 2012 [11 favorites]

It doesn't make any sense. I don't see why anyone would make tea that way. The bag goes in first.
posted by koeselitz at 8:29 AM on May 12, 2012 [1 favorite]

Any tea involving bags is not epic.
posted by peppermind at 8:35 AM on May 12, 2012 [9 favorites]

An epic teabagging however, that would be something to see.
posted by The Whelk at 8:37 AM on May 12, 2012 [8 favorites]

By Grabthar's Hammer, by the Sons of Warvan, you shall be teabagged.
posted by zombieflanders at 8:40 AM on May 12, 2012 [15 favorites]

Lemon?
posted by Summer at 8:49 AM on May 12, 2012

needs a WARNING: ALAN RICKMAN DOES NOT USE HIS MARVELOUS, LUXURIANT VOICE DURING ANY PART OF THIS RECORDING disclaimer.
I mean, really.
posted by $0up at 8:54 AM on May 12, 2012 [41 favorites]

Any tea involving bags is not epic.
Why do you think he was so unhappy with it?
posted by deliquescent at 8:57 AM on May 12, 2012 [5 favorites]

Any tea involving bags is not epic.

I favorited this, but on second thought: PG Tips is pretty epic.
posted by fiercecupcake at 9:00 AM on May 12, 2012 [4 favorites]

No true Englishman would put up with tea like this, to be sure, but the Shyamalan-esque plot twist at 3:50 makes this worth it.

I'm sure Rickman's done something on film that wouldn't reduce me to a warm pile of fangirl, but I have yet to see it. I mean look at the end of this -- he somehow makes it sexy when he sits down.
posted by Countess Elena at 9:05 AM on May 12, 2012 [5 favorites]

There's about a one-minute stretch in there where Mr. Rickman is looking straight at me and it's deeply unnerving.
posted by Suddenly, elf ass at 9:05 AM on May 12, 2012 [8 favorites]

Schieß dem Fenster.
posted by Nick Verstayne at 9:08 AM on May 12, 2012 [2 favorites]

Inception soundtrack, Dream Is Collapsing I think.

No, I think that's Mind Heist.
posted by elizardbits at 9:08 AM on May 12, 2012

Yes, it's Mind Heist (also in the youtube tags). Dream is Collapsing for comparison.
posted by curious nu at 9:22 AM on May 12, 2012 [1 favorite]

（╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
posted by Secretariat at 9:23 AM on May 12, 2012 [4 favorites]

I'm pretty sure his third-act behavior is because they gave him a cup with water already in it.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 9:24 AM on May 12, 2012

I had to stop this video in disgust when the uploader replied "No way!" when asked if he liked Buffy; like it's some crap he scraped off his shoe. Grrrr!
posted by Brocktoon at 9:39 AM on May 12, 2012

reminding you.. to move.. the porkchops.. from the freezer.. to the refrigerator.. so they defrost properly. do not.. disappoint me.
posted by phaedon at 9:40 AM on May 12, 2012 [3 favorites]

A lemon and a tea-bag?

That's not tea; that's heresy.
posted by a womble is an active kind of sloth at 9:49 AM on May 12, 2012

SNAPE KILLS DARJEERLING
posted by ShutterBun at 9:51 AM on May 12, 2012 [3 favorites]

Based on the speed with which Alan Rickman does everything else, I can only assume this video is presented in real time.
posted by ShutterBun at 9:55 AM on May 12, 2012

WAIT greg does this mean you have never seen Inception?

THIS IS A GRAVE INJUSTICE.
posted by elizardbits at 10:04 AM on May 12, 2012

Eh just watch On Her Majesty's Secret Service upside down, pausing occasioanlly to look at some Le Corbusier illustrations
posted by The Whelk at 10:09 AM on May 12, 2012 [2 favorites]

ah, crap. No ice and sugar. WTF?

Just kidding. I love AR and all his stuff.
posted by mule98J at 10:13 AM on May 12, 2012

No true Englishman would put up with tea like this

This is how John McClane knew he was a German.
posted by Bunny Ultramod at 10:28 AM on May 12, 2012 [3 favorites]

（╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ ~~~ /"\B
posted by drlith at 10:40 AM on May 12, 2012 [7 favorites]

"Truly, this brew, disguised as a Muggle beverage, would bring about Potter's final downfall," thought Snape.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 10:48 AM on May 12, 2012

This video was part of a series by David Michalek called Portraits in Dramatic Time for the 2011 Lincoln Center Festival. Performers were given a 10" × 10" area and 10 to 15 seconds to dramatize an emotional state.

Portraits was a sequel to a previous project Slow Dancing Films, which were 5-second portraits of world-class dancers and choreographers. And there are more from both works on his Vimeo account (including the original Alan Rickman video).
posted by thebestsophist at 11:01 AM on May 12, 2012 [12 favorites]

There's about a one-minute stretch in there where Mr. Rickman is looking straight at me and it's deeply unnerving.

posted by Suddenly, elf ass

Eponysterical!
posted by Celsius1414 at 11:09 AM on May 12, 2012

'Hey, who the fuck is that woman over there? She's got to be a half-troll.'

The R.A. replies, 'No, that's Professor Snake. She sucks for the most part, you know, acting mysterious and theatrical.'

'God, I hate that shit,' replies Harry. 'I'm here to learn, not to watch a performance.'
posted by erniepan at 11:19 AM on May 12, 2012 [6 favorites]

I HOPE YOUR PARENTS BUY YOU A NEW PILLOW TO CRY INTO
posted by The Whelk at 11:27 AM on May 12, 2012 [2 favorites]

Mr. Takagi... won't be joining us... for the rest... of his life.
posted by steef at 12:46 PM on May 12, 2012 [2 favorites]

Way too long!

His watch may have stopped at 6 PM.
posted by thomas j wise at 12:56 PM on May 12, 2012

A lemon and a tea-bag?

That's not tea; that's heresy.

Hey screw you pal. Lemon is the only acceptable additive to black tea.
posted by eugenen at 2:20 PM on May 12, 2012

So this is not the thread to share my southern style iced tea recipe?
posted by device55 at 3:23 PM on May 12, 2012

Only if you can sound British, sexy, and disappointed in all of us when you do.
posted by zombieflanders at 3:28 PM on May 12, 2012 [3 favorites]

I'm going to need a monocle.
posted by device55 at 3:32 PM on May 12, 2012 [1 favorite]

"what are you kids doing here?"
"we fucking go to school here."
"you will be schooled here."
"you are so fucking stupid" says harry. and a insues...a staring match of silent restraint.....................­........and of coarse harry is the victor.
posted by rebent at 3:51 PM on May 12, 2012

(a reference, of course, to one of Rickman's stellar performances)
posted by rebent at 3:53 PM on May 12, 2012

I always get his name mixed up with Rick Wakeman. So when I click on a link expecting to hear prog-rocking keyboard solos, I often end up seeing Hans Gruber/Severus Snape instead.
posted by chillmost at 4:28 PM on May 12, 2012 [1 favorite]

Did not make tea correctly. Made tea in the foul and wholly incorrect American fashion. Is no longer to be considered British. Will never watch any of his movies again.
posted by Decani at 5:06 PM on May 12, 2012 [1 favorite]

The American fashion is a lot more dramatic than I had envisioned.
posted by RobotHero at 6:13 PM on May 12, 2012 [1 favorite]

Listen. Listen. Hey, listen. Everyone is wrong about tea. Except me.
posted by TwelveTwo at 6:32 PM on May 12, 2012 [4 favorites]

Alan Rickman can make tea badly if he wants to. Would you argue with the Potions Master?
posted by arcticseal at 7:54 PM on May 12, 2012

I love Alan Rickman but it took a whole lot of willpower to make it 2 minutes and then I gave up. Or rather, I then clicked on 3:45, watched for 15 seconds, and was satisfied. Also, Hans Zimmer is the man.
posted by Sayuri. at 7:55 PM on May 12, 2012 [1 favorite]

it took a whole lot of willpower to make it 2 minutes and then I gave up

No no, try again. I'm telling you I flinched at 3:49. That's when it really gets exciting.

Zimmer-love
posted by TWinbrook8 at 8:09 PM on May 12, 2012

"Look Daddy - tea snobs!"

"Splendid. Let's watch a while, shall we?"

"Why are they flinging dung at one another?"

"Well you see, petal, the one who flings it with the expression that indicates they are the most wronged, aggrieved and mortified wins. In their own minds, they become elevated to the status of, say, Douglas Adams, or Stephen Fry. See how the other snobs try to get the upper hand with their deriding of lemon, and scathing critiques of what kind of water should go where and when."

"But it's just a fucking drink, isn't it, Daddy? I mean, they have it with bloody toast, or biscuits out of a packet. It's not exactly otemae, is it?"

"Quite right, petal. Quite right."
posted by obiwanwasabi at 8:35 PM on May 12, 2012 [5 favorites]

This seems like a good time to look at Orwell's recipe for tea.
posted by Bokmakierie at 9:47 PM on May 12, 2012

Next time someone posts an AskMe wondering how to tell if they have ADHD, I'm sending them to this video. How many seconds can you watch it before you have to jump forward?
posted by The corpse in the library at 11:03 AM on May 14, 2012