Now, That's Talent!

June 6, 2012 11:47 AM

'Don't judge a book by its cover.' America's Susan Boyle? Andrew De Leon [Austin Audition | America's Got Talent 2012] (SLYT)
posted by ericb (79 comments total)

Well that was unexpected...
posted by Windopaene at 11:54 AM on June 6, 2012

Oh I guess lightning can strike twice.
posted by SharkParty at 11:57 AM on June 6, 2012 [4 favorites]

Actually, isn't that pretty much exactly what he should look like?
posted by Horace Rumpole at 11:59 AM on June 6, 2012 [6 favorites]

Dammit.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 12:00 PM on June 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

Having spent rather a lot of time in Austin's goth bar, I have to say none of that was the least bit surprising.

I do like the ...Got Talent shows better than the Idol shows because hey, opera! Or whatever, rather than poorly-executed terrible pop.
posted by restless_nomad at 12:02 PM on June 6, 2012

Problem with this sort of thing is if he does get famous he risks having this goth look be an integral part of his fame. As he grows older the goth look may not be so appealing to him. He may find that his fans won't let him drop it.
posted by 2manyusernames at 12:04 PM on June 6, 2012

Does anybody else feel like these things are starting to feel super condescending? Or, rather, they've always been so, really. It's like, "Hey America/Britain/Whatever! There's somebody with unconventional looks and/or an unconventional background that can actually sing! Isn't that weird and amazing?!"

Also, his singing didn't sound that great to me? But I'm no opera expert.
posted by kmz at 12:04 PM on June 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

America's got talent is surprisingly fun to watch. No one takes themselves too seriously, and a lot of freaks and geeks get to show off to a seriously enthusiastic crowd.
posted by Think_Long at 12:05 PM on June 6, 2012

Permit me to get a little voice-snobby here:

Opera is HARD. It is specifically written to be sung by people who know how to sing that way. Most people don't.

AGT tends to have that sort of Charlotte Church kind of person who sings on-pitch and reasonably well, but insists on singing opera because they have (or want to have) vibrato. Vibrato can actually be a sign that your voice is tired. You can seriously damage your voice by singing the wrong way.

The odd thing is that I think this kid actually sounded like a pretty damn decent countertenor. I have a couple friends who are pretty serious countertenors, and in some ways it's even harder than normal opera singing. I wonder if he even knows what a countertenor is. I hope he gets some training and becomes more familiar with Baroque stuff, if he feels so inclined, because he just might be able to do it.

Good on ya.
posted by Madamina at 12:07 PM on June 6, 2012 [16 favorites]

*yells over song* THAT DUDE'S GOT TALENT!!!
posted by Edogy at 12:08 PM on June 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

If this kid has never sung in front of anyone before, then he's never had voice training, either. Does he have the technique to actually support his voice? If he does continue singing, I hope he gets some good coaching.

Thanks to everyone who linked to Klaus; the YT sidebar led me to a full length documentary on Klaus Nomi that I never saw before.
posted by maudlin at 12:09 PM on June 6, 2012 [4 favorites]

Goddammit, people. It should be "America Has Talent".
posted by Edison Carter at 12:11 PM on June 6, 2012 [5 favorites]

Well that was unexpected...

No it wasn't, this entire post is framed in such a way as to let you know EXACTLY what to expect. You know you're going to witness something that looks one way but IS another.
posted by Fizz at 12:12 PM on June 6, 2012 [3 favorites]

Goddammit, people. It should be "America Has Talent".

Looks like somebody's talent is being a real spoilsport!
posted by (Arsenio) Hall and (Warren) Oates at 12:13 PM on June 6, 2012 [6 favorites]

this entire post is framed in such a way as to let you know EXACTLY what to expect. You know you're going to witness something that looks one way but IS another.

That's true, but I didn't expect him to be a countertenor. Yodeling, maybe?
posted by Admiral Haddock at 12:14 PM on June 6, 2012 [5 favorites]

Well ... it's a Brits' fault. The show was created by Simon Cowell.
posted by ericb at 12:16 PM on June 6, 2012

Looks like somebody's talent is being a real spoilsport!

Indeed, I have been zinged.

Or is it "I got zinged"?
posted by Edison Carter at 12:16 PM on June 6, 2012

All our zing belong to you.
posted by maudlin at 12:18 PM on June 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

America's got talent is surprisingly fun to watch.

ughhh I tried but I can't stand how they layer bland inspiration-rock over the top of the acts they are trying to downplay like the entire show is one long wacky training montage.
posted by SharkParty at 12:18 PM on June 6, 2012

The whole time watching him I was trying to figure out how those contacts work. Do they have reflective material in them?
posted by royalsong at 12:18 PM on June 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

restless_nomad: Having spent rather a lot of time in Austin's goth bar, I have to say none of that was the least bit surprising.

Not only that, but it shouldn't really be that surprising to anyone who watches America's Got Talent. Or even those of us who are made aware of reality TV through snarky websites and The Soup and the occasional headline.

Case in point:

Susan Boyle first appeared as a contestant on Britain's Got Talent on 11 April 2009.

1. KEVIN SKINNER IS AMERICA'S SUSAN BOYLE, New York Post, 2 July 2009

CHICKEN-catcher Kevin Skinner -- who is being called the American Susan Boyle after a stunning debut this week on "America's Got Talent" -- had never sang outside a friend's basement before he took the country by storm Tuesday night.

2. People Magazine TV Watch, 16 July 2009

It's an America's Got Talent adage: frumpy often means "diamond in the rough." And Wednesday's episode proved it to be true when homely radiology tech named Kari Callin from Seattle pulled the classic Susan Boyle move.

3. Has America's Got Talent found its Susan Boyle?, Daily Mail Online, 12 August 2010

When a ten-year-old walked out in her pretty pink dress, her blonde hair neatly bobbed, it was hard to imagine she'd have any talent worth watching. But America's Got talent may have just found its Susan Boyle.

4. 'America's Got Talent' Found Its Susan Boyle in Texas, AceShowbiz.com, June 30, 2011

America may have just found its Susan Boyle. In the Houston, Texas audition of Got an awkward housewife named Cindy Chang decided to make her dream as a singer come true. At the end of the day, her pipes made judge Piers Morgan stand up and people chant her name.

America HAS talent, SHOULD stop judging a book by its cover, and IS suffering from a lack of imagination by some of those who cover pop culture.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 12:20 PM on June 6, 2012 [11 favorites]

Is this where I get to brag that a guy I know (Eric the "mind reader") was on last night and made it through to next phase? I hope so, because I have to tell somebody!
posted by bondcliff at 12:21 PM on June 6, 2012 [4 favorites]

America HAS talent, SHOULD stop judging a book by its cover, and IS suffering from a lack of imagination by some of those who cover pop culture.

It's called a recipe and they're NOT going to stop. It continues to work, continues to generate high ratings and sales for advertisements and product placements. It's the very reason I DON'T watch reality television. It's all the same old same.

yawn
posted by Fizz at 12:22 PM on June 6, 2012

Every aspect of this is cringe-inducing.
posted by odinsdream at 12:22 PM on June 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

Eric the mind reader was pretty great! HOW DO HE KNOW????
posted by Madamina at 12:23 PM on June 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

Your friend boggled my mind, bondcliff. Trying to figure out how he did it. (Current theory is some kind of feeling with his fingers.)
posted by royalsong at 12:23 PM on June 6, 2012

Goddammit, people. It should be "America Has Talent".

Does America have talent?

Yes, America (ha)s got talent.
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 12:27 PM on June 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

Also, just because:

Is this the kind of thing I would have to own a television to know about?
posted by Madamina at 12:28 PM on June 6, 2012

He (ha)s got you there!
posted by SharkParty at 12:28 PM on June 6, 2012

(Per my earlier comment, I apologize to and didn't intend to insult ericb for the use of the phrase "America's Susan Boyle" -- FPPs aren't your job)
posted by MCMikeNamara at 12:35 PM on June 6, 2012

Dude. I was trying to be silly.
posted by Edison Carter at 12:35 PM on June 6, 2012

Eric Dittelmen the Mind Reader -- video (Hulu).
posted by ericb at 12:37 PM on June 6, 2012

Goddammit, people. It should be "America Has Talent".

Goddammit, people. It should be "In America, there is a nontrivial number of people who are regarded as having talent".
posted by Philosopher Dirtbike at 12:38 PM on June 6, 2012 [7 favorites]

I just wish that there were more not-singing people on the Got Talent shows. I mean, singing competitions are okay, but America's Got Enough Damn Singing Competitions. Every season of AGT has been won by a singer, except for one guy who was a ventriloquist... who sings.
posted by specialagentwebb at 12:40 PM on June 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

America's Goth Talent, amirite?
posted by adamrice at 12:40 PM on June 6, 2012 [7 favorites]

metafilter: Goddamit, people.
posted by Blue_Villain at 12:40 PM on June 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

yeah thats pretty much my opinion specialangentwebb. My family member was like, "Sit down for a second, you have to see this guy!" (Guy this FPP is about)

"Ugh, I don't want a singer to win this show." is what I say while she fast forwards through the commercials.

Then I seen this guy. "When I said I didn't want a singer to win, I didn't mean people like him."

My family member smirked at me.
posted by royalsong at 12:43 PM on June 6, 2012

Until today, I never would have possibly imagined that someone popping in hysterical looking contact lenses and wearing black lipstick before going on stage in front of a televised audience could possibly have a shred of talent. I guess it could be time to re-calibrate my preconceived notions.
posted by crunchland at 12:46 PM on June 6, 2012 [3 favorites]

metafilter: Goddamit, people.

My first MeFi slogan! So proud.
posted by Edison Carter at 12:46 PM on June 6, 2012

... except for one guy who was a ventriloquist

Ooh, ooh ... caught this video of a very talented ventriloquist, Nina Conti, at Devour the other day.
posted by ericb at 12:47 PM on June 6, 2012

After reading this today, indicating NBC doesn't appear to do much in the way of vetting the claims of AGT contestants (long story short - country singing veteran claimed to have developed a severe stutter due to brain injuries suffered in a grenade attack in Afghanistan, appears to be full of shit), I'm having a bit of a hard time believing the "never sang in front of anybody, ever" aspect to this.
posted by The Gooch at 12:48 PM on June 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

I was more surprised to see that Howard Stern is MCing America's Got Talent.
posted by codacorolla at 12:54 PM on June 6, 2012

So goth dude pulls a Klaus Nomi on national TV? I expect a Total Eclipse cover this season.
posted by prinado at 12:55 PM on June 6, 2012

I like America's Got Talent for gems like the West Springfield Dance Group!
posted by mmmbacon at 12:59 PM on June 6, 2012

I'm having a bit of a hard time believing the "never sang in front of anybody, ever" aspect to this.

I'm pretty sure that if this is the case, we'll all find out about it in another 100,000 YouTube views or so. I'm sort of rooting for the Little Goth Boy Who Could to be legit, though - if for no other reason that it could open the doors to professional voice training for him, and then he'd really know what he's got. And it would be good for his confidence and all that. If this was really another case of America Got Punk'd, well meh - it is an engaging fiction with nice narrative arc, engagingly done. And unlike the faux-war-hero, there's no harm, no foul here.
posted by DarlingBri at 1:00 PM on June 6, 2012

Related (sort of): Goth Opera is the title of the first novel published by Virgin Publishing in their Missing Adventures range of Doctor Who novels. It's a sequel to the TV episode "State of Decay" and a sequel to the New Adventure book Blood Harvest; the title include "Goth" because vampires and contains "Opera" because... it was the 90s.

(For some reason, the phrase "goth opera" kept jumping out to me when I read an article about this guy, and now I know why.)
posted by MCMikeNamara at 1:02 PM on June 6, 2012

Boats and hos!
posted by Bunny Ultramod at 1:06 PM on June 6, 2012 [3 favorites]

the phrase "goth opera" kept jumping out to me

And now I'm hearing the phrase in my head, to the tune of "Rock Lobster". Man.
posted by Edison Carter at 1:11 PM on June 6, 2012 [14 favorites]

We were on TV
Everybody had dreams of fame
Somebody went on stage
And there was a goth

It wasn't just a goth
It was a goth opera

Goth opera
Goth opera

Goth opera
Goth opera
posted by filthy light thief at 1:17 PM on June 6, 2012 [14 favorites]

Down down down down dowwwwn
posted by Edison Carter at 1:20 PM on June 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

Thank you -- I was trying to come up with an opera-related subject to fill in the blank "Boys in eyeliner, girls in _____, " but really don't have the time or dedication to the bit.

(Also thank you for making my Doctor Who related derail into a completely different discussion.)

Watch out for that piranha.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 1:33 PM on June 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

Does anybody else feel like these things are starting to feel super condescending? Or, rather, they've always been so, really. It's like, "Hey America/Britain/Whatever! There's somebody with unconventional looks and/or an unconventional background that can actually sing! Isn't that weird and amazing?!"

Doug Stanhope does a very funny bit about this aspect to the Susan Boyle story. It's an incredibly ugly part of these shows.
posted by Bookhouse at 1:36 PM on June 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

I do like the ...Got Talent shows better than the Idol shows because hey, opera! Or whatever, rather than poorly-executed terrible pop.

The taiko drumming group I was in a few months ago was approached by America's Got Talent. We dithered about auditioning because it was at a incredibly bad time for our schedule, and the contract had some pretty scary stuff in it.
posted by Foosnark at 1:42 PM on June 6, 2012

Oh God I love taiko drumming! The Austin Marathon people get the local group to play right at the start of the associated 5k (I assume they play at some point for the actual marathoners too) and I have to say there is no better way to start a footrace.
posted by restless_nomad at 1:44 PM on June 6, 2012

the contract had some pretty scary stuff in it

Angry wolves? Crying babies? TELL US.
posted by elizardbits at 1:56 PM on June 6, 2012

Moar taiko, please.
posted by cairnish at 2:04 PM on June 6, 2012

Doug Stanhope does a very funny bit about this aspect to the Susan Boyle story. It's an incredibly ugly part of these shows.

Here's a link I found to an audio recording of (what I presume to be) this bit. It may require Flash or something, I don't know. There's some racially-insensitive language used in the service of Stanhope's point, if that kind of thing bothers you. Anyway I thought it was funny and apropros.
posted by kjh at 2:30 PM on June 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

Man, you know, I want to believe, but...

His parents (who he suggests he never fit in with) and sister (girlfriend?) are in the front row of the balcony with a "we love you" sign. They've allegedly never heard him sing before. I don't know, it just reeks of fake tv narrative B.S. Sure, it is possible that they genuinely came to these auditions because they wanted to hear him sing and sure the producers might just move family members of performers up to the front of the balcony so they can be interviewed, but man it just seems contrived.

Do they do one on one interviews with everyone in line just in case they turn out to be "the next Susan Boyle?" Maybe they do, maybe they don't. Again, it seems contrived.

It is, of course, entirely possible that his story is 100% true and of course selective edited of footage might make something that was entirely genuine in context look contrived. At least the reactions of Stern, Osbourne and Mandel seem genuine.

---

That all said, my issue with these shows is that they are exploitative. They make piles of money off of these amateurs and barely pay them anything. How many of them are ever seen again after the run of the show is over?
posted by Joey Michaels at 2:36 PM on June 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

Oh my god Foosnark, please more details about taiko and/or contracts.
posted by specialagentwebb at 2:46 PM on June 6, 2012

Am I the only one who came in expecting goth Bo Didley?
posted by Dr Dracator at 2:53 PM on June 6, 2012

I was more surprised to see that Howard Stern is MCing America's Got Talent

I was more surprised to see Howard Stern not act like a total jerk.
posted by bitteroldman at 3:05 PM on June 6, 2012

Here's a link I found to an audio recording of (what I presume to be) this bit. It may require Flash or something, I don't know.

Let's try it like this: Doug Stanhope - Ugly Woman Who Could Sing (SLYT).
posted by phoebus at 3:46 PM on June 6, 2012

bitteroldman: I was more surprised to see Howard Stern not act like a total jerk.

He's even had a downright sappy moments on that show.


Foosnark: ... the [AGT] contract had some pretty scary stuff in it.

Here's a Google quickview of a 45 page PDF, which is supposedly a copy of the AGT agreement, and a Google quickview of a 4 page "Revised AGT Short Form Release" PDF that is hosted on NBC.com. Here's a forum post about someone who read an AGT contract, and claims it is worse than MCA contracts from the 1980s and 90s.
posted by filthy light thief at 4:23 PM on June 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

Clearly it should be AMERICA IS IN POSSESSION OF TALENT.

Also, my favorite Klaus Nomi clip. This was before people knew who he was; it must have been absolutely shocking to the audience (who were there for some cheesy tongue in cheek "new wave vaudeville" show). Totally otherworldly.
posted by Flunkie at 4:24 PM on June 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

America HAS talent, SHOULD stop judging a book by its cover, and IS suffering from a lack of imagination by some of those who cover pop culture.

The real question is this: Who is MetaFilter's Susan Boyle?
posted by vidur at 4:57 PM on June 6, 2012

It should be "In America, there is a nontrivial number of people who are regarded as having talent".

You mean the United States of America. Because America is basically the whole continent, you know.
posted by Gator at 5:20 PM on June 6, 2012

I used to have the thing about one day mastering the aria "Ebben? Ne andrò lontana," singing along with Wilhelmenia Wiggins Fernandez in the soundtrack to my favorite film whenever I happened to be alone in the house. I'd had a fair amount of exposure to countertenors in the first decade of my secret opera career, and I had a major voice-crush on Drew Minter, who was practicing in one of the rooms in the bowels of the Kennedy Center around the corner from where they were staging an opera for which I had little to do. I'd just hang around the door, watching through the crack, and thrilling to the glorious contrast of face and voice, daydreaming, and I'd sing in my Datsun the whole way home up the winding route of Beach Drive.

In one of my many attempts in seeming privacy, midway through belting out the best part, the light clicked on and my father stepped in.

Wilhelmenia Wiggins Fernandez continued on, but I stood there with a scowl.

"It's getting awfully Weimar in here," he said, with a raised eyebrow.

"This from the guy with a fully-stocked make-up case, who dances in his drawers to Frankie Goes To Hollywood when no one's home."

"Well, you're going flat at the top, so you'd better keep it up if you're going to get it."

"I'm not flat at the top!"

"Kid, I'm just sayin'."

Of course, I got flatter as time passed, and proper lessons might have helped, but not by much. These days, I'm happy if I can do Zarah Leander a bit of justice, but I've blown my chance to be a gender pioneer, alas.

As it happened, I was loosely dressed as Klaus Nomi when I met my first adult romantic interest, when he ventured into the basement lair in a group house of dinner theater actors that I'd completely painted silver in an homage to the silver Factory. He was a former Insect Surfer dressed as a baseball referee, I was sulking in a long grey frock with my hair in three perfect frosted points and listening to Telex, and it was love at first sight on All Hallow's Eve.

There's still something about a high-voiced man, something masculine and sexy, like a string of pearls on a powerlifter.

Now go get 'em, Mr. De Leon.
posted by sonascope at 6:02 PM on June 6, 2012 [9 favorites]

sonascope, you are my favorite one man HBO dramedy series.
posted by ocherdraco at 6:18 PM on June 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

How soon we forget. Susan Boyle was Britain's Paul Potts.
posted by TWinbrook8 at 6:57 PM on June 6, 2012

I don't know about it being fake. Either he's depressed or maybe at home, his parents are assholes and are putting up a front. Whatever it is, it is heartbreaking that he says he isn't good at anything. As someone who used to have zero self esteem when I was younger and believed the same shit, again, it's heartbreaking.
posted by stormpooper at 7:07 PM on June 6, 2012

He's a very good looking young man, and it's only his adoption of the (quite stylish and attractive) goth look that makes him stand out as a "freak" or "reject"... and isn't that a part of that whole identity? You aren't allowed to be a goth with a lot of friends and love and acceptance.

Beats me, I am just a little meh about this guy and his tragic backstory.
posted by Meatbomb at 8:49 PM on June 6, 2012

I'm not saying there's not stretching of the truth by Andrew or the show, but presumably the A(h)GT process is similar to American Idol. First, they have open auditions where the teeming masses come through a cattle call with literally dozens of different staffers for whom they audition, in parallel, in small side meeting rooms at some convention center. The on-air judges aren't even in the same state at this point. The staffers make notes, such as "Really good singer" or "Laughably bad dancer", etc, and all the audition videos and short interviews are kept on file. Meanwhile the on-air host is around to mingle in these crowds and interact with the line of people as they wait. Naturally, attention-seeking or interesting looking people, etc, will get special attention and be more likely to have some video of their initial audition. The quiet, polite, and non-crazy people who are really good will usually just have a two second clip of them in line as camera men had walked down the line, with the voice over "We first met ___ in line at the ____ auditions..." since they don't have much else.

Then, after these thousands have poured through, the producers look over the notes for anyone who seemed exceptional in some way from the staffers' viewpoint, watch their videos/read the application and bio, and cull the list down to the callbacks. These are the people who are asked to come back weeks or months later, where the actual teevee judges will be there, and comprise a much, much smaller group. AI more than any show will allow "joke" auditions in, including "Mock the Retard" auditions for which they are rightly criticized; from what I've seen the other shows keep that to a minimum. All of them will of course have some likely-to-be-rejected cases come back, either because of an interesting story, or simply to ensure the audience doesn't just know everyone gets through.

As an aside, in the case of shows like SYTYCD and apparently American Idol and The Voice, they also will reach out to specific individuals known in the industry to try out, bypassing the initial cattle call round (SYTYCD is notorious for this, but understandably- the dance world is very small and close-knit, and great dancers for the show are probably already working in studios with friend-of-a-friend choreographers). I don't know if AGT bothers to do this, since their realm is so wide and diverse, and thus less of a built-in working relationship.

So at this point of the callback round which comprise the "auditions" we see on TV, they've already got an idea who will likely get a nod from the judges, and of course have had time to start assembling video packages for the auditioners, including soundbites from when they auditioned, even in-home/at-work visits if the backstory was notable to the producers. They've also coached the auditioner briefly as to which facet of their backstory to play up, such as "Oh, the cancer thing, be sure to talk about that!". This is why you get auditioners who seem to overstate something, like a childhood illness/accident, or the extremeness of their audition story- "I want to finally be heard" from someone who's been a semi-pro trained singer for a decade or two, for example, or "I was homeless" from someone who couch-surfed for one weekend. The producers are telling them to boil down and trump up the story for dramatic effect.

The "fiction" of AGT and American Idol and similar shows is that each and every person who shows up at the open auditions gets to perform in front of the celebrity judges. I think "So You Think You Can Dance" is more 'pure' in this regard, but they get hundreds- not tens of thousands- of auditioners, and as I mentioned will also have auditioners who are asked to come by the show's producers.

So yes- it's not inconceivable that Andrew had never sang in this style outside of his bedroom, auditioned in front of some nameless staffer- figuring if he was rejected, no one would have to know about it. The staffer probably jotted down "Wow, really good/surprising voice, interesting story, consider for callbacks" in their notes. A few weeks later he's notified that he's coming back for the formal audition, and is asked to bring friends and family, coached to wear the same clothes he had at the original audition, etc. At that point, of course, he can't very well not sing for his family, or let them know "Oh yeah, I auditioned for AGT, and they're asking me back".

Which, at long last, is why we can quite plausibly have video of him honestly saying "I've never sang in front of even my family" and not have it conflict with the reality of two months later, where his family is well aware of this singing ability/style, and that he's on the show, and being told to continue his original backstory of "No one has ever heard me sing before today".
posted by hincandenza at 10:30 PM on June 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

Hey, Grammar Fiends! How will you feel about the world as a whole when you learn that in the Middle East, it's called Arabs Got Talent? It hurts. so. good.
posted by lauranesson at 10:50 PM on June 6, 2012

I wonder what Marilyn Manson would say to him, words of advice and all. That's a conversation I'd LOVE to hear.
posted by iamkimiam at 1:25 AM on June 7, 2012 [1 favorite]

I wonder what Marilyn Manson would say to him, words of advice and all. That's a conversation I'd LOVE to hear.

"The key to making a good burger is to sear it on both sides and never, ever press on it. That just forces all the grease out and makes cleaning the stove at closing that much more of a pain in the ass. They don't like paying overtime at this Red Robin and Mr. Hernandez, the night supervisor, can be a real dick, so be sure to get as much done before close as you can. Also, if you are going to toke up, do it while on trash duty."
posted by robocop is bleeding at 6:10 AM on June 7, 2012 [4 favorites]

"You aren't allowed to be a goth with a lot of friends and love and acceptance."

Crap I've been doing it all wrong the whole time!
posted by kyrademon at 7:20 AM on June 7, 2012

Whenever I see that Susan Boyle clip, I'm always puzzled as to why Simon is so skeptical. Surely someone who's been around in the music industry knows that looks have absolutely no correlation with musical talent? Of course, the same thing probably happens all the time on Idol, but I'm not curious enough to want to watch.
posted by TheSecretDecoderRing at 3:42 PM on June 7, 2012

Surely someone who's been around in the music industry knows that looks have absolutely no correlation with musical talent?

By the time he sat in front of a camera to do Britain's Got Talent in 2009, he had been an Idol judge since 2002 and had probably become used to his stupid routine of being a jerk to the ugly people who make fools of themselves on the show. So maybe he wasn't so much surprised that an ugly person could sing as he was surprised that the people who line up suckers for him to insult on television had put someone in the queue who could actually sing.
posted by The World Famous at 5:59 PM on June 7, 2012

Singing vet gave 'America's Got Talent' a photo of another soldier.
posted by ericb at 9:26 PM on June 7, 2012