The Wonderbra. YOU'RE WELCOME!
July 1, 2012 11:23 AM   Subscribe

Know Canada. Happy Canada Day!
posted by Fizz (75 comments total) 7 users marked this as a favorite

 
What's Canada?
posted by Ghostride The Whip at 11:26 AM on July 1, 2012


It's a terrible ginger ale, I think.
posted by Sys Rq at 11:29 AM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


As a Canadian, DO NOT LIKE. Sorry. /Obligatory Canadian apology.
posted by antiquated at 11:30 AM on July 1, 2012 [4 favorites]


Canadians: They won't say they're much better. It's just that they're less worse.
posted by Talez at 11:30 AM on July 1, 2012 [5 favorites]


Our friends in the north will be delighted to learn that this is an initiative of the American NYC-based public radio show, Studio 360. Bruce Mau is a noted Canadian designer though.

Best quote from the design document:
"“Know Canada.” inspired by “You Ottawana get to know us.” Submitted by Studio 360 listener Joe, from Las Vegas."

But honestly this kind of thing has been done much better already by Canadian radio.
posted by Bwithh at 11:30 AM on July 1, 2012 [3 favorites]


How dare they! Tim Hortons and the beaver are still valid in the 21st century. I refuse to have Stephen Harper representing me.

Nice framing with the red bars though.
posted by arcticseal at 11:30 AM on July 1, 2012 [4 favorites]


In all seriousness, CBC's This is That (as linked in my post above) is hilarious and very smart, and all would-be Canadian national identity branders should consult them as experts. If only Know Canada had done this.
posted by Bwithh at 11:34 AM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


No, Canada.
posted by dephlogisticated at 11:34 AM on July 1, 2012


Will Munro is very Canadian though. As is Stan Douglas. (but is Tatou Cardinal on the list, or Tanya Tagaq, they should be)
posted by PinkMoose at 11:36 AM on July 1, 2012


Smuh?
posted by clvrmnky at 11:37 AM on July 1, 2012


SLCF (Single Link Canadian Flash)
posted by oneswellfoop at 11:38 AM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


The Glorious Giant Moose Brigade of Canada.
posted by Purposeful Grimace at 11:44 AM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


No. Really, no.
Hate it. Leave the maple leaf be. Don't touch what's already perfect.
This redesign is more about Bruce Mau than about Canada - this new work is weak, only relevant to the short term, and does not in any way represent the totality of us.
posted by seawallrunner at 11:45 AM on July 1, 2012 [8 favorites]


Telling people they need to get educated about Canada isn't going to do much for our growing reputation for smugness. That said, I do like the implementation of the red bars as a concept.
posted by runningdogofcapitalism at 11:47 AM on July 1, 2012


Coke Red&White
posted by Theta States at 11:49 AM on July 1, 2012


Stephen Harper may not be as good as the Wonderbra, but he is a big boob.
posted by Apropos of Something at 11:50 AM on July 1, 2012 [11 favorites]


Hi, Canada.
posted by TwelveTwo at 11:51 AM on July 1, 2012


I think those boobs are actually Californian. So, FAIL.
posted by jimmythefish at 11:52 AM on July 1, 2012



I think those boobs are actually Californian. So, FAIL.
The woman is Canadian. The boobs are Californian.
posted by deathpanels at 12:00 PM on July 1, 2012 [5 favorites]


Doug Coupland's Souvenir of Canada. Nice book and film, eh?
posted by Carol Anne at 12:06 PM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


Also where is William Shatner? Caulking gun? Cirque du Soleil? Abraham Pineo Gesner father of the petroleum industry? Cardiac pacemaker? Samantha Bee? James Naismith inventor of basketball? John Charles Fields? James Randi? X-Men's Wolverine? Peanut butter? Marshall McLuhan? The Fog Horn? Anne of Green Gables? Table Hockey? Marie-Joseph Angélique famous for setting the city of Montreal on fire? Also, where is poutine?
posted by TwelveTwo at 12:07 PM on July 1, 2012 [5 favorites]


"“Know Canada.” inspired by “You Ottawana get to know us.” Submitted by Studio 360 listener Joe, from Las Vegas."

Well of course it was prompted by outsiders, Canadians don't like to brag.
posted by The Whelk at 12:08 PM on July 1, 2012


I have now been educated. Canadians have a complex about America.
posted by Brocktoon at 12:08 PM on July 1, 2012 [3 favorites]


Nested parentheses might do here, with red bars bracketing Anderson and bears bracketing the breasts.
posted by zippy at 12:10 PM on July 1, 2012


Sorry, I ate the poutine.
posted by arcticseal at 12:11 PM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


Sorry, I ate the poutine.

But did you eat the bowl?
posted by Fizz at 12:14 PM on July 1, 2012


Well, that's just great. Way to share, calgarian. :|
posted by TwelveTwo at 12:14 PM on July 1, 2012


you people have a weird word for disco fries.
posted by The Whelk at 12:15 PM on July 1, 2012


From the PDF, here's the full list of things they want you to know are Canadian:
‘Canadarm’
‘DEW line’ radar stations
‘Switched On’ by Islands, Montreal based band
20% of the World’s Freshwater is in Canada
Adrienne Clarkson
Agne Macphail
Alex Trebek
Alexander Graham Bell
Anne Murray
Avril Lavigne
Baby polar bear
Barbara Ann Scott
Basketball
Biosphère
Blackberry
Bombardier
Broken Social Scene
Butter tarts
Caesar (cocktail)
Canada Day Celebration
Canadian passport stamp
CBC
Celine Dion
Centennial Flame
Cindy Klassen
Coco Rocha
Conrad Black
David Suzuki
Douglas Coupland
Dragonette
Drake
Evangeline Lily
Evelyn Hart
Fay Wray
Feist
George Brown
Group of Seven
Guy Maddin
Hockey fights
James B Harkin
Jay Manuel
Jeanne Beker
Jenna Talackova (Miss Canada)
Jennifer Baichwal
John Candy
Joni Mitchell
Joseph Smallwood
Julie Payette
Kids in the Hall
Kinnie Star
Laser Class sailboats
Leonard Cohen
Les Stroud
Lester B. Pearson
Margaret Atwood
Margot Kidder
Metric
Molson beer
Mount Meager
Nanaimo bars
National Gallery
Naturalization Ceremony for immigrants in Ottawa
North Warning System
Ookpik (arctic owl)
Pamela Anderson
Parliamentry government
Paul Shaffer
Peanut butter
Perce Rock
Polka Dot Door
Quebec tuition protests
Ryan Gosling
Same-Sex Marriage
SHAD
Shalom Harlow
Stephen Harper
Superman
The CN Tower
The garbage bag
The paint roller
The Telephone
The Walker
The Walkie Talkie
Trivial Pursuit
Vancouver Living Roof
Vimy Memorial
Volcanic eruption is possible in remote areas of Northwest Canada
Wawadit’la totem
Will Munro
Winnie the Pooh
Winnipegs Most
posted by Rhomboid at 12:18 PM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


Parliamentry government

My incredulity shot my eyebrows so high up that I now need to go see a doctor.
posted by TwelveTwo at 12:20 PM on July 1, 2012 [5 favorites]


we'd better start paying attention - tim horton's are springing up all over the place in michigan - why there's even one in my hometown!

the canadians are INVADING US WITH DONUTS!
posted by pyramid termite at 12:20 PM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


Happy Gay Pride Hangover Day!
(You all know that's more important. Also, Madrid might not have the most impressive Gay Pride parade, probably only 10 floats, but holy crap they've a spectacular city wide after party.)
posted by jeffburdges at 12:23 PM on July 1, 2012


I have now been educated. Canadians have a complex about America.

Yeah, this is actually my main beef (Montreal-deli brisket, of course) with this campaign. Interesting concept, but it reeks of the self-conscious, over-anxious, quasi-colonial southward gaze. That hey-we're-in-Hollywood-too mentality that defined a lot of Canadian culture over the second half of the 20th century. Did you know Mike Myers is Canadian? And Sarah Maclachlan too! And they're big in the States! Isn't that oh so special?

One of the refreshing things about the last decade or so, IMHO, has been Canada's growing poise, at least in matters cultural. Bands like Arcade Fire and New Pornographers succeeded internationally by staying at home on their own terms, not by relentlessly begging for American attention. The salient detail about Edward Burtynsky isn't that he's Canadian but that his work is completely distinctive. Seth Rogen did a movie with Sarah Polley whose title is a Leonard Cohen song (they're all Canadians, for the record) without wrapping it up in the flag or littering it with winking references to curling and poutine. Writers from Rohinton Mistry to Naomi Klein choose themes that have nothing to do with coming of age on the unforgiving prairie. And so on.

Whereas this? It's like, hey, Pamela Anderson - betcha didn't know she was Canadian, didja? And it's got no real relevance to her career, does it?
posted by gompa at 12:27 PM on July 1, 2012 [15 favorites]


TwelveTwo: "Well, that's just great. Way to share, calgarian. :|"

If any MeFite wants to come to Calgary, I'll happily buy them beer/poutine to make up for eating their share.
posted by arcticseal at 12:29 PM on July 1, 2012


And I'll throw in an Alley Burger (much more distinctly Calgarian)!
posted by gompa at 12:33 PM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


What, no mention of Stompin' Tom Connors?

For shame.
posted by empatterson at 12:44 PM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


Canada is a former colony in permanent search of a master.
In that spirit may I present something else left off the list; Nomeansno, from Victoria, BC.
Very appropriate for this particular Canada Day don't you think?
posted by Phlegmco(tm) at 12:45 PM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


And a happy Canada Day to you as well!

*clinks glasses*

But what's this about a redesign? We don't need any such thing, especially not now when "Canadianness" is finally complicated enough to escape the stereotypes. We're a country with good and bad aspects, a place that's wide enough to produce both Tommy Douglas and Stephen Harper, Jesus of Montreal, Arcade Fire, Mitsou and Celine Dion, David Cronenberg and the Scanners movies, all the good hockey teams and most of the players on the terrible ones, the top of Mount Logan and ebb tide in the Bay of Fundy... It's just huge and complicated and wonderful and there's no easy definition.
posted by Kevin Street at 12:53 PM on July 1, 2012 [6 favorites]


It's just huge and complicated and wonderful and there's no easy definition

Gotta keep reminding myself of this. In these particularly bleak months of the Royal Canadian Harper budget, the jingoistic F-35 fiasco and all these self-serving War of 1812 commemorations, I'm finding it hard just now to express my admiration in the Canada of Elizabeth May and Naheed Nenshi and Mordecai Richler and the Weakerthans and so on and so forth. Feels like national pride itself has been hijacked for short-term partisan political purposes.

I need to shake that off, drink a Calgary microbrew or two and listen to some Rural Alberta Advantage until I feel better.
posted by gompa at 1:11 PM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


I liked this Canadian response to Abe Lincoln, Vampire Hunter
posted by chapps at 1:13 PM on July 1, 2012 [4 favorites]


Yeah, no.

But if they had skipped Harper and included Glenn Gould, I would dislike it a tiny little bit less.
posted by snorkmaiden at 1:23 PM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


Also, what's the point of including all of those things if they're mostly completely indistinguishable? And now that I've read the list, needs way more First Nations representation.
posted by snorkmaiden at 1:24 PM on July 1, 2012 [4 favorites]


Christ, "Canada day"?

Before you know all the other states will want their own day. Mississippi, The Celebration! -- is that what you want?
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 1:28 PM on July 1, 2012 [7 favorites]


I kid because I absolutely heart Canada and nearly all Canadians
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 1:30 PM on July 1, 2012


the canadians are INVADING US WITH DONUTS!

That would probably actually work.
posted by desjardins at 1:30 PM on July 1, 2012 [3 favorites]


As an ignorant American (married to a Canadian), I think of Canada as a big cold place full of really polite but kinda edgy people who spend their days smoking excellent marijuana and wishing wistfully that they were closer to Europe and farther away from the fat loud flag-waving God-botherers crowding their southern border.

Please do not disabuse me of these notions.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 1:32 PM on July 1, 2012 [11 favorites]


Seriously, I don't care what Americans think of us as long as they keep their right-wing politics, racism, sexism/ war on women, violence, guns, drug tests, privatized prisons, human rights abuses, shitty beer, and general unpleasantness on their side of the line. (No offense meant, I know you're mostly very nice, as individuals).

Oh wait- Stephen Harper. Augh! I can't stand that guy!

Anyways, happy Pride Week! You're all welcome to come over for maple-syrup flavoured beers if you behave yourselves!
posted by windykites at 1:53 PM on July 1, 2012 [3 favorites]


Well, in honour of Canada Day, here's the MeFi Swap mix I sent out a couple of swaps ago, Beaver Hour.

1. Classified: Oh Canada [Halifax NS]
2. K’naan: Bang Bang (feat. Adam Levine) [Toronto ON]
3. Beast: Mr. Hurricane [Montréal QC]
4. Red Mass: Saturn [Montréal QC]
5. Bran Van 3000: Love Cliché (alt. version feat. At The Drive-In) [Montréal QC]
6. Japandroids: Younger Us [Vancouver BC]
7. Matt Mays: Rock Ranger Record [Halifax NS]
8. Chixdiggit: I Wanna Hump You [Calgary AB]
9. Pink Mountaintops: The Gayest of Sunbeams [Vancouver BC]
10. Sunny Duval: Sauvage [Montréal QC]
11. Le Volume Etait au Maximum: Les Teenage Gluesniffers [Montréal QC]
12. The Tragically Hip: Born In The Water [Kingston ON]
13. Meatdraw: Are We Gonna Die? [Victoria BC]
14. The Rural Alberta Advantage: Drain The Blood [Toronto ON]
15. Hannah Georgas: Let’s Talk [Victoria BC]
16. Carolyn Mark & NQ Arbuckle: Officer Down [Victoria BC / Toronto ON]
17. Corb Lund and the Hurtin’ Albertans: Long Gone to Saskatchewan [Edmonton AB]
18. Les Trois Accords: Saskatchewan [Drummondville QC]
19. The Weakerthans: Tournament of Hearts [Winnipeg MB]
20. New Pornographers: Your Daddy Don’t Know [Vancouver BC]
21. The Marble Index: I Believe [Hamilton ON]
22. The Acorn: Strange Animal [Ottawa ON]
23: Dan Mangan: Robots [Vancouver BC]
24. Radio Free Vestibule: Zalgon 26 McGee [Montréal QC]

And it's not only Canadian music, there's as much Canadiana in there as possible (especially with the videos included): MusiquePlus! Curling! The French Maid! Gowan! Hockey! Ranching (and the economics thereof)! FUBAR! Saskatchewan! Jian Ghomeshi! The Sault Ste. Marie Language Resolution Of 1990! Sketch Comedy! Toronto (the 80s band)! French! Heritage Moments!
posted by Homeboy Trouble at 2:26 PM on July 1, 2012 [17 favorites]


Canada doesn't need a redesign, it just needs an election. (And another one, and another one, until we get it right.)
posted by klanawa at 2:27 PM on July 1, 2012 [6 favorites]


From the PDF, here's the full list of things they want you to know are Canadian:
  • ‘Canadarm’
And Candarm2! (aka, the Mobile Servicing System)

Althought, you could probably guess both of those, as well as 'Canada Day Celebration', 'Canadian passport stamp' and 'CBC' just from the names.

Blackberry? That one isn't as strong an brand as it once was...
posted by autopilot at 2:28 PM on July 1, 2012


I know it was a flip remark, but poutine is really really not disco fries.

(Is there something deeply flawed in me that my patriotism runs to Stompin' Tom and poutine?)
posted by syncope at 2:42 PM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


Not at all, syncope! They're both wonderful.

And Homeboy Trouble, there's so much awesome in your post I'd favorite it a hundred times if I could, but this favorite is for Gowan! A criminal mind...
posted by Kevin Street at 2:50 PM on July 1, 2012


We also have Canada to thank for teaching us how to get a free case of beer.
posted by Cash4Lead at 2:53 PM on July 1, 2012


Gompa--

As an Albertan, living in Toronto, who is aching for the food of my people, I refuse to beleive that Montreal Deli Brisket is better than anything made on the ranches of home. Who, are also not on the list.

Happy Canada Day
ase
posted by PinkMoose at 3:02 PM on July 1, 2012


(also, homeboy trouble, holy fuck is that an amazing mix)
posted by PinkMoose at 3:04 PM on July 1, 2012


Well, PinkMoose, I can indeed go to CostCo and get ribeyes that would put the choicest steakhouses in much of the rest of the world to shame (or go to the friendly fraulein Regina at the Crossroads Market and get steaks truly without equal) so I guess I take 'em for granted. Whereas the medium-fat from Schwarz's with a side of fries? Followed by a delirious brisket-drunk stumble down the Main? That's a rare and divine treat.

And the only thing I might want to change about Homeboy Trouble's excellent mix for Canada Day would be "Frank, AB" instead of "Drain the Blood" as the RAA contribution. Haunted ballads about turn-of-the-century rockslides just seem Canuckier somehow.
posted by gompa at 3:13 PM on July 1, 2012


Happy Canadian complex day!
posted by DonnyMac at 3:17 PM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


gompa, now I'm hungry!
posted by arcticseal at 3:20 PM on July 1, 2012


Well, in honour of Canada Day, here's the MeFi Swap mix I sent out a couple of swaps ago, Beaver Hour.

How did you miss "True Patriot Love" by Joel Plaskett?
posted by Sys Rq at 3:22 PM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


(also, homeboy trouble, holy fuck is that an amazing mix)
posted by PinkMoose at 3:04 PM on July 1 [+] [!]


Holy Fuck is also an awesome Canadian band!
posted by smartypantz at 3:27 PM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


I yearn for good prarie beef, but I have never had the brisket at schwartzes---soon, like all proper Toronto hipsters, im moving to montreal, so soon.
posted by PinkMoose at 3:35 PM on July 1, 2012


also, HOLY FUCK might be my favourite rock band lately
posted by PinkMoose at 3:36 PM on July 1, 2012


Ask for medium-fat, PinkMoose. It was Barney Panofsky's preferred sandwich. It's a savoury bite of Canadian literary history.
posted by gompa at 3:36 PM on July 1, 2012


As a Canadian, I wish to say: We love our American Cousins. We share cultural DNA, and we both have imperfect politicians. And kisses to my relatives in The States. Have a happy July 4th.
posted by ovvl at 3:40 PM on July 1, 2012 [3 favorites]


You know, it's bad enough to include Stephen Harper, Molson, and "Quebec tuition protests" in that list of things that's supposed to represent Canada, but "Conrad Black, exiled Canadian media baron"? REALLY?

Also, the patent on peanut butter was granted to a Canadian, but the indigenous peoples of Mesoamerica were certainly the first people to grind peanuts to a paste. I call shenanigans.

Also also, Ookpik is not a "ficticious Canadian mammal" by any definition of "mammal" and by most definitions of "fictitious".
posted by gingerest at 4:57 PM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


If you go to Nanaimo, they just call them Bars ...
posted by bc_fred at 5:09 PM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


I just heard through Twitter that everyone on the design agency campaign team behind this work is American
posted by Bwithh at 5:10 PM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


obligatory Molson's ad
posted by Bwithh at 5:14 PM on July 1, 2012


Isn't Jian Ghomeshi involved in the flip-side of this project - where they redesign America? I haven't heard any of the actual segments but I have heard him talk about this project.
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 6:06 PM on July 1, 2012 [1 favorite]


Our quiet but smart and friendly kid brother keeps trying to impress us. We're too busy turnin doughnuts in our sweet Trans-Am to notice.
posted by vorpal bunny at 6:31 PM on July 1, 2012


I liked this Canadian response to Abe Lincoln, Vampire Hunter

Or, for a full-length, pre-emptive response, there's Jesus Christ, Vampire Hunter, which takes you from the shores of Meech Lake, all the way to Laurier Street.
posted by frimble at 7:36 PM on July 1, 2012 [2 favorites]


Oh, Canada, yeah, right. Nice fellas, used to come around every October or November or so in a big Winnebago with their little red and white flag flapping. Funny guys, used to want talk about hockey all the time. Sure, I've seen the Predators play and the Capitols, but really, I couldn't understand half the shit those guys were talikin'. Anyhoo, they'd pack up their stuff and head out come March or so, couldn't stand the heat down here or something. Nice fellas them.
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 4:46 AM on July 2, 2012


Perky "Canada" Has Own Government, Laws
It's Monday morning, and Toronto resident Steve Dorman shares a quick breakfast of "eggs" (a native food) with his "wife" (an officially state-sanctioned mate), and discusses yesterday's poor showing by the hometown team in "baseball" (a popular local sport). After a kiss on his wife's cheek, he hops on the "subway train" (a mode of subterranean transport) to the office.

This is life in exotic Canada City, the capital set deep in the heart of the mysterious land known as Canada (pronounced CAN-a-da).
posted by Rhaomi at 2:02 PM on July 3, 2012 [2 favorites]


Average Canadian richer than average American.
posted by Obscure Reference at 2:31 PM on July 17, 2012 [2 favorites]


That's an interesting article, but I wouldn't call our system "socialist" in any way. The government owned some (but by no means all or even a majority) of the means of production up into the 80s, but they sold it all off.
posted by Kevin Street at 11:41 AM on July 18, 2012


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