Bob Dylan’s “Titanic” anticipated by Tim Heidecker

July 24, 2012 6:53 PM

Rumor has it that Bob Dylan's upcoming album Tempest will feature a 14-minute song about the sinking of the Titanic, which seems pretty plausible, right? The guy has written about the Titanic before, and he likes to tell long, repetitive stories, not unlike your very talented Grandpa. Well, Tim Heidecker (of Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!) has decided to try and anticipate Mr. Dylan's song, creating his own epic that encompasses not only the amazing, historically accurate tale of the ill-fated ship, but also the adventures of a movie pirate named James Cameron.
posted by porn in the woods (37 comments total)

Tim Heidecker - You Sir, Are THE newbobdylan. Grate Job!
posted by noaccident at 7:03 PM on July 24, 2012

And once Bob Dylan rips off Tim Heidecker for his upcoming disc we'll finally be able to prove time travel is possible. James Cameron can direct the movie.
posted by cjorgensen at 7:05 PM on July 24, 2012

Although Tim & Eric have always been very hit or miss for me, I've really enjoyed the music of Heidecker & Wood
posted by stifford at 7:11 PM on July 24, 2012

I came prepared to hate, but this is pretty funny.
posted by KokuRyu at 7:20 PM on July 24, 2012

Well played! But boy, 14 minutes is a long time for a song, regardless of who is performing.
posted by juliplease at 7:27 PM on July 24, 2012

That's actually pretty good, but I'm hoping Bob does something a bit more rollicking and story-driven; maybe like 'Molly, Rose and the Jack of Hearts.'
posted by Flashman at 7:31 PM on July 24, 2012 [1 favorite]

Lily, Rosemary and the Jack of Hearts?
posted by clockzero at 7:38 PM on July 24, 2012 [2 favorites]

Yes, it seems perfectly plausible that Whining Bob will write a 14-minute song. Or failing that, yet another one that seems like it.
posted by Decani at 7:46 PM on July 24, 2012

This reminds me a lot of Ween's Buenas Tardes Amigo.
posted by Rory Marinich at 7:54 PM on July 24, 2012

That's not fair, Decani. I love the first two or three minutes of several Bob Dylan songs.
posted by Curious Artificer at 7:54 PM on July 24, 2012 [4 favorites]

Huh. And I liked the first two minutes of that song, too.
posted by Curious Artificer at 7:58 PM on July 24, 2012

Also, I hope everybody here knows that Heidecker released a song cycle about former presidential candidate and possible second coming Herman Cain, because it is the most awesome.
posted by Rory Marinich at 8:07 PM on July 24, 2012 [2 favorites]

Molly, Rose and the Jack of Hearts

Is that anything like Lily, Rosemary, and the Jack of Hearts? (Sorry to pick nits, but I listened to Blood on the Tracks about 1000 times when I was a morose teenager.)
posted by dhens at 8:09 PM on July 24, 2012

For a song that's not funny or interesting at all, it sure is way too fucking long and slow.
posted by fleacircus at 8:14 PM on July 24, 2012

Molly, Rose and the Jack of Hearts

Is that anything like Lily, Rosemary, and the Jack of Hearts?

Goodness gracious.

Flashman clearly knows that the song is "Lily, Rosemary, and the Jack of Hearts." Because the song is about the Titanic, He substituted Molly (the unsinkable Molly Brown -- real passenger on the Titanic and character in the movie played by Kathy Bates, I believe) for Lily, Rose (the name of the female lead in the movie played by Kate Winslet) for Rosemary, and kept Jack the same because the male lead of Titanic was named Jack (and played by Leonardo DiCaprio).

Lily -- Molly
Rosemary -- Rose
Jack of Hearts -- Jack

I don't like to explain my own jokes, but I am happy to explain the jokes of others.
posted by flarbuse at 8:17 PM on July 24, 2012 [12 favorites]

Yes, it seems perfectly plausible that Whining Bob will write a 14-minute song. Or failing that, yet another one that seems like it.

However dull and tiresome you think Dylan is, this is--assuredly--more so.
posted by clockzero at 8:23 PM on July 24, 2012 [7 favorites]

It's only 5 minutes long, but Harry Chapin did this topic 35 years ago.
posted by worldswalker at 8:25 PM on July 24, 2012

flarbuse: fair enough, I thought Flashman was citing that as an example of a "rollicking and story-driven" Dylan song.
posted by dhens at 8:26 PM on July 24, 2012

Bob Dylan is the single greatest culture... achievement of postwar United States. He's your Anne Murray.

I will love Bob Dylan until the day I die
posted by KokuRyu at 8:26 PM on July 24, 2012 [2 favorites]

I was hoping it would have at least an eighth of the energy of Hurricane.
posted by shakespeherian at 8:44 PM on July 24, 2012 [1 favorite]

Not only is this song a pitch-perfect pastiche of the style of the album Desire, but the narrative "bait-and-switch" device at the end of the song is the same as that used in the song "Black Diamond Bay" from said album.

Thanks for sharing.

PS: Apologies again to Flashman, I didn't make the connection.
posted by dhens at 8:49 PM on July 24, 2012 [1 favorite]

juliplease: "Well played! But boy, 14 minutes is a long time for a song, regardless of who is performing."

Not a Grateful Dead fan, I presume?
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 8:52 PM on July 24, 2012

No problem. In hindsight, perhaps I should have put a comma after the 'like', or omitted the 'like' altogether.
posted by Flashman at 8:53 PM on July 24, 2012 [1 favorite]

Needs more 3-D.
posted by mediated self at 9:01 PM on July 24, 2012 [1 favorite]

Flashman: It's not your fault, I've just blocked all things Titanic from my consciousness, so the names didn't ring a bell.
posted by dhens at 9:12 PM on July 24, 2012

Well played! But boy, 14 minutes is a long time for a song, regardless of who is performing.

Except Television, who could play "Marquee Moon" or "The Dream's Dream" for 45 minutes and I'd still be riveted to the spot.
posted by mykescipark at 9:20 PM on July 24, 2012

haha. Man, boomers like this guy and he's all serious and stuff, you better get out there and take him down a notch.

Although I have to complement Heidecker on founding a career on being unattractive in a plain way
posted by This, of course, alludes to you at 9:29 PM on July 24, 2012 [1 favorite]

actually wait didn't Garrison Keillor do this a while ago too
posted by This, of course, alludes to you at 9:47 PM on July 24, 2012

It's only 5 minutes long, but Harry Chapin did this topic 35 years ago.

Woody Guthrie's got this covered 68 years ago.

Pete Seeger in 1957.

Peggy Seeger's got a 2012 song out... (Weirdly, earlier this evening, I was listening to Peggy Seeger's husband Ewan MacColl's song "The Ballad of Ho Chi Minh", which is also nautically oriented.)
posted by ThisIsNotMe at 10:19 PM on July 24, 2012

Jamie Brockett had an interesting take on the subject as well.

Four hundred ninety-seven and a half feet of rope.
posted by Betafae at 4:08 AM on July 25, 2012

This isn't as laborious as "Joey." But it's close.
posted by Fritz Langwedge at 5:34 AM on July 25, 2012

Woody Guthrie's got this covered 68 years ago. Pete Seeger in 1957.

Today's most useless, though related, bit of trivia.
The Guthrie song much later became a popular Scouts summer camp song and even later, the song my late lamented high school would sing (lyrics changed) to insult our cross town rivals, Admiral King High School. Admiral Ernest J. King Jr. being the chief of naval operations in World War II and generally described as the most unpleasant man in the navy. But good at his job.
posted by etaoin at 6:14 AM on July 25, 2012

The longest Bob Dylan songs I can think of offhand are 'Desolation Row,' 'Hurricane' and 'Joey.' I like those songs pretty okay.
posted by box at 7:29 AM on July 25, 2012

I think technically the longest Dylan song is "Sad Eyed Lady of the Lowlands."

I'm a big Dylan fan. But the epic Dylan songs get monotonous when they stretch past ten minutes (YMMV) because he never varies the verse-chorus-verse-chorus-verse-chorus-you-get-the-picture pattern he uses for every single one of them. The Who and the Beatles would string together different melodies and songlets to produce long suites that were a lot more interesting to listen to than Dylan's repetitive epics.
posted by Fritz Langwedge at 7:45 AM on July 25, 2012

I'm a big Dylan fan. But the epic Dylan songs get monotonous when they stretch past ten minutes

He gave up singing those sorts of folk songs referenced by Heidecker a looooong time ago, which is probably why Dylan is still around and other 1960's artists are not (Dylan changed).

I quite like Highlands (16:31), the last long Bob Dylan song (from 15! Fifteen years ago!).
posted by KokuRyu at 8:33 AM on July 25, 2012

I quite like Highlands (16:31)

Good grief. The most teeeeeeedious of the bunch.
posted by Fritz Langwedge at 9:05 AM on July 25, 2012

Jamie Brockett had an interesting take on the subject as well.

Yeah, I saw him do that live back sometime around 1975. It's almost 14 minutes long, too; I thought that might be the song people are wondering about. Brockett's version, more of a raving than a talking blues, was co-written with Chris Smither, and adapted from an earlier Leadbelly song called “The Titanic.” (It’s Jaime, not Jamie.)

Greg Ward, who writes about the Titanic, is working on a list of Top 10 Titanic Songs.
posted by LeLiLo at 4:54 PM on July 26, 2012