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You know, I think I'm too lazy to change all this back to normal, that's the real issue.
August 17, 2012 11:59 AM   Subscribe

Little brother hacked your Facebook profile? Redecorate his room for a teenage girl. In Dutch, with subtitles. [SLYT]
posted by valkyryn (75 comments total) 22 users marked this as a favorite

 
Based on some of the objects, NOT a "little girl's" room.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 12:01 PM on August 17, 2012 [14 favorites]


What have you learned from this?

"I learned my brother is a dick."
posted by Kevin Street at 12:05 PM on August 17, 2012 [9 favorites]


The redone room looks better.
posted by The Whelk at 12:06 PM on August 17, 2012 [2 favorites]


The meaning of "frape", for urban dictionary. Not sure if I'm OK with that concept. (kids these days!)
posted by Doleful Creature at 12:07 PM on August 17, 2012


It's never a good sign when you come home and a camera crew is waiting for you.
posted by Kevin Street at 12:07 PM on August 17, 2012 [11 favorites]


I learned a new word today - "frape." I don't think I like it.
posted by thecjm at 12:07 PM on August 17, 2012 [19 favorites]


This is what happens to a country that eats chocolate for breakfast.
posted by The Whelk at 12:08 PM on August 17, 2012 [4 favorites]


not even watching the video I'm guessing the person either 1) left themselves logged into Facebook or 2) used their browser's "save my password" feature. no surprise
posted by zombieApoc at 12:08 PM on August 17, 2012


"Even the floor!"
posted by ericb at 12:08 PM on August 17, 2012 [2 favorites]


Taking the door off was a master touch!
posted by HuronBob at 12:09 PM on August 17, 2012 [2 favorites]


I thought bedazzling the vibrator was a nice touch.
posted by jeffburdges at 12:10 PM on August 17, 2012 [8 favorites]


Redecorate his room for a teenage girl.

A sexually active teenage girl at that!
posted by ericb at 12:10 PM on August 17, 2012


Does "What the fuck is this?" really sound basically the same in English as in Dutch? I don't speak Dutch, so...

Also, he could take out some of the loose stuff in that room and it would look pretty great. If anyone asks why his room is pink with stars and birds in it, he could laugh and say that a prank war got out of hand, which is a funny and true explanation.
posted by Sticherbeast at 12:10 PM on August 17, 2012 [2 favorites]


I love that "fuck" sounds the same in Dutch as it does in English. No mistaking that word!
posted by eoden at 12:12 PM on August 17, 2012


Sticherbeast: Yeah it does. The two languages are pretty closely related and a lot of simple phrases sound very similar.
posted by rubbish bin night at 12:15 PM on August 17, 2012


that was actually more interesting and funny than i expected.

i love the dolphin and beebs posters. hilarious!

that poor kid. wonder what they did with his porn stash. or do the kids keep it all digital these days, so no embarrassing under-the-bed finds by mom (or brother and his friends)?
posted by sio42 at 12:15 PM on August 17, 2012


"What? NO! It's really well done too! . . . Nice colors . . . *sob*"
posted by Think_Long at 12:16 PM on August 17, 2012 [18 favorites]


"frape."

I'm just gonna pretend that is the Dutch version of Frappé.
posted by poe at 12:16 PM on August 17, 2012 [1 favorite]


Yeah, it's really weird/cool how Dutch occasionally hovers around the edge of comprehensibility for English speakers, especially for the more Teutonic-sounding bits. Like, "De cat is op de mat" or "enzovoort" or "wat is dit." Or "fuck" apparently.
posted by en forme de poire at 12:16 PM on August 17, 2012


Reminds me of this
posted by sparklemotion at 12:17 PM on August 17, 2012


Oh, this is just the best thing I have seen on the net .. well, today.
posted by kariebookish at 12:18 PM on August 17, 2012


Yeah Dutch is close enough to English that listening to Dutchmen talk is a bit like waking up from a really werid dream all hungover like.
posted by The Whelk at 12:18 PM on August 17, 2012 [17 favorites]


Yeah, it's really weird/cool how Dutch occasionally hovers around the edge of comprehensibility for English speakers, especially for the more Teutonic-sounding bits.

Here is Eddie Izzard demonstrating that West Frisian (spoken in parts of the Netherlands) and Old English are, to some extent, mutually intelligible.
posted by junco at 12:18 PM on August 17, 2012 [21 favorites]


The porn stash is his browsing history -- or if he surfs "incognito", not even that.
posted by LordSludge at 12:19 PM on August 17, 2012


Like you spend half the time on the tram ALMOST understanding things, it's a very strange experience.
posted by The Whelk at 12:19 PM on August 17, 2012


It sounds the same because we drop a lot of English words into our speech, 'what the fuck' being one of the most used ones.
posted by prolific at 12:19 PM on August 17, 2012 [3 favorites]


I think The Whelk already got the definitive take on Dutch back in June.
posted by valkyryn at 12:19 PM on August 17, 2012


Does "What the fuck is this?" really sound basically the same in English as in Dutch? I don't speak Dutch, so...
English is so influential in movies, television and music that it's a running joke to translate English idiom literally in an ostentatiously dumb manner.
So the English exclamation "what the fuck is this" becomes "wat de fok is dit?". Fok is ethymologically related to fuck but means "to breed animals".
posted by joost de vries at 12:20 PM on August 17, 2012 [13 favorites]


It's actually a lot worse than that, sparklemotion. But I'm 99% sure that they put everything back afterwards, because everything about this seems so good-natured otherwise.
posted by Kevin Street at 12:20 PM on August 17, 2012 [1 favorite]


Re "frape:" Previously on AskMe
posted by RobotHero at 12:22 PM on August 17, 2012


See, I'd just think about doing shit like this. It takes dedication to follow through.
posted by cjorgensen at 12:22 PM on August 17, 2012


Also every post involving Holland is required by law to link to this comment.
posted by The Whelk at 12:25 PM on August 17, 2012 [2 favorites]


See, I'd just think about doing shit like this. It takes dedication to follow through.

That's what really sealed the deal on the joke, especially when the brother sighs that he's far too lazy to undo the prank.
posted by Sticherbeast at 12:26 PM on August 17, 2012 [2 favorites]


Re "frape:" Previously on AskMe

For the record, I assumed it was some weird Dutch word with no literal English translation. Little did I know...

posted by valkyryn at 12:26 PM on August 17, 2012


Here is Eddie Izzard demonstrating that West Frisian (spoken in parts of the Netherlands) and Old English are, to some extent, mutually intelligible.

This is the coolest thing I've seen in a long time.

Does "What the fuck is this?" really sound basically the same in English as in Dutch?

I assumed he had just adopted it; it is pretty prolific. One of my teenage Russian students last year, who barely spoke English, used it all of the time. And this was turned in by another student who didn't speak English much better. Not that it's otherwise labeled in Cyrillic. (We were on an archaeological dig.)
posted by peacrow at 12:28 PM on August 17, 2012


"Dammit."
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 12:28 PM on August 17, 2012


*note
posted by peacrow at 12:28 PM on August 17, 2012


It could have been worse. I think the transformation was restrained. Not nearly enough bright pink.

Taking the door off was a nice touch, though.
posted by Thorzdad at 12:29 PM on August 17, 2012


Hm. Tomorrow there'll be an Amsterdam mefi meetup. A very uncommon occurrence.
Maybe I should test this hypothesis of the understandability of Dutch on these unwitting anglophone expats and just stick to speaking Dutch to them. I'll report back.
posted by joost de vries at 12:32 PM on August 17, 2012 [6 favorites]


If I were an expat I would just assume that you had a speech impediment and smile encouragingly at your incomprehensible utterings.
posted by Think_Long at 12:34 PM on August 17, 2012


As a former fifteen-year-old boy, I can state authoritatively that any embarrassment I might feel at this treatment would be completely and utterly mitigated by the knowledge that good-looking women had been in my room, for any reason whatsoever, at any time, particularly if sex toys had been left there.
posted by Halloween Jack at 12:34 PM on August 17, 2012 [9 favorites]


"What the fuck" sounds the same in Dutch because it *is* the same. The Dutch are extremely prolific in appropriating English phrases verbatim, to the endless dismay of many language purists.
posted by monospace at 12:34 PM on August 17, 2012


Here is Eddie Izzard demonstrating that West Frisian (spoken in parts of the Netherlands) and Old English are, to some extent, mutually intelligible.

That's all well and good, but Old English and modern English aren't remotely mutually intelligible. Modern English is mostly just French with a terrible accent.
posted by Sys Rq at 12:35 PM on August 17, 2012 [1 favorite]


If I were an expat I would just assume that you had a speech impediment and smile encouragingly at your incomprehensible utterings.
...this polite indulgence is the reaction that my mutterings get anyway. By Dutch nationals as well.
So I guess nothing will be proven.

(Who am I kidding. I won't be speaking any Dutch to any Americans or Brits. We don't. We can't. It's just too tempting to exercise our English. Just like speaking to Germans or French people.)
posted by joost de vries at 12:42 PM on August 17, 2012


Now I want my room done up like that.
posted by shakespeherian at 12:43 PM on August 17, 2012


English is so influential in movies, television and music that it's a running joke to translate English idiom literally in an ostentatiously dumb manner.
So the English exclamation "what the fuck is this" becomes "wat de fok is dit?". Fok is ethymologically related to fuck but means "to breed animals".


A friend of my parents is an award winning Chicken breeder and once told the British ambassador that she "foks chickens" for a living at a reception. His response: "oh, indeed?"
posted by atrazine at 12:43 PM on August 17, 2012 [31 favorites]


Which is why the old dutch surname Fokker causes such mirth in the Ben Stiller movies.
posted by joost de vries at 12:46 PM on August 17, 2012 [2 favorites]


This is the coolest thing I've seen in a long time.

The complete show that's taken from, Mongrel Nation, is great. It used to be on youtube, but I don't know if it still is.

That's all well and good, but Old English and modern English aren't remotely mutually intelligible. Modern English is mostly just French with a terrible accent.

Did you watch the video? "Ic wille bycgan ane brune cu" is not terribly far off the modern equivalent. Around half of commonly-used words in ModE are Germanic via Anglo-Saxon.
posted by junco at 12:49 PM on August 17, 2012


I would so have done that to my younger brother, even without the provocation of a hacked facebook acccount (or whatever the 1970's equivalent was).

But I have to wonder, especially given the production quality of the video, if this wasn't staged for some Dutch "reality" TV show, or perhaps it is a viral ad for paint or something.
posted by TedW at 12:50 PM on August 17, 2012


I do love me some Old English (the language).
posted by eoden at 12:54 PM on August 17, 2012


If only you anglo-saxons wouldn't have lain with those French Normans.
posted by joost de vries at 12:56 PM on August 17, 2012


Hm. Tomorrow there'll be an Amsterdam mefi meetup. A very uncommon occurrence.
Maybe I should test this hypothesis of the understandability of Dutch on these unwitting anglophone expats and just stick to speaking Dutch to them. I'll report back.


Good thing I saw this thread then. I'm in Den Haag for some holiday time, so I'll probably come to that.
posted by atrazine at 12:58 PM on August 17, 2012


Maybe I should test this hypothesis of the understandability of Dutch on these unwitting anglophone expats and just stick to speaking Dutch to them. I'll report back.

Bring it.
posted by digitalprimate at 12:58 PM on August 17, 2012


(and I'll, um buy you a beer or something)
posted by digitalprimate at 1:00 PM on August 17, 2012


If only you anglo-saxons wouldn't have lain with those French Normans.

But that third syllable is just so sexy! Try it --- just add -tion!
posted by Diablevert at 1:00 PM on August 17, 2012 [1 favorite]


Ha. I recognise a taunt when I see one.
If only I spoke Frisian like my old father.

Sounds good atrazine. I'll see you tomorrow.
posted by joost de vries at 1:03 PM on August 17, 2012


If only you anglo-saxons wouldn't have lain with those French Normans

Oh let's you resist red hair and beef stew.
posted by The Whelk at 1:04 PM on August 17, 2012 [5 favorites]


That kid doesn't really have the class to do this, but the absolute best way to react to this prank would be utter and abject enthusiasm and adoration for the makeover.

"Oh my gawd! I LOVE THIS! And you even got this awesome Justin Bieber poster!" *huge hug*
posted by koeselitz at 1:26 PM on August 17, 2012


sparklemotion: Reminds me of this

As also seen on MetaFilter.
posted by filthy light thief at 1:35 PM on August 17, 2012 [1 favorite]


My favorite line from the younger brother: "It's really well done too..."

koeselitz: the absolute best way to react to this prank would be utter and abject enthusiasm and adoration for the makeover

The problem is then that you will continue to get girly gifts. Instead, I'd say "Oh, thanks for cleaning my room" and act really bored.
posted by filthy light thief at 1:37 PM on August 17, 2012 [2 favorites]


Man, the Dutch appropriation of "what the fuck" is so far advanced that Google translate even uses it.

Do Dutch speakers understand what they're saying at the word-by-word level when they use this? I'd guess that Dutch and English are so close that they do, but I remember working with some (native) French speakers who would exclaim "why why why" when irritated, but they didn't know the English word "why" = "pourquoi".
posted by benito.strauss at 1:49 PM on August 17, 2012


Who am I kidding. I won't be speaking any Dutch to any Americans or Brits. We don't. We can't. It's just too tempting to exercise our English.

But to English speakers, Dutch is -- as you have seen above -- a passing mystery. Being able to speak even a sentence of it intelligibly fills us with great pride.

The first time I went to the Netherlands, I arrived knowing exactly four words of Dutch: "Alstublieft" and "Dank U wel." Over the course of six days there, I found enough similarities to English and to German that I could take a stab at words here and there.

On my departure, I was headed back to Amsterdam with an Israeli colleague who was also flying home. We had been at a meeting in Friesland, which was four train trips and a full day away from Amsterdam. Luckily we found a Belgian colleague of ours was driving in the right direction and he could drop us at Utrecht, which is a short train ride from Amsterdam (40km).

The Israeli and I picked up our train tickets and we were directed to platform 7. We were unable to locate platform 7 in the Utrecht train station, but I hazarded a guess that maybe 7A might work just as well. My Israeli friend suggested I should ask someone, but I did not want to come across as an Ugly American, so I figured I would try to ask in Dutch.

I tried to construct an appropriate question in my head from the pieces of grammar and vocab I have acquired that week, approached a railway employee and asked in my admittedly heavily-accented Dutch, "Alstublieft, is dit de spoor voor de treyn naar Amsterdam?" ("Excuse me, is this the platform for the train to Amsterdam?") He answered me, "ja," which I accepted with relief, because frankly the Dutch for, "No, this is 7A -- you want 7, which is up that ramp, across the bridge and down the second pedestrian walkway on your left past the mosaic commemorating famous heroin casualties and cheeses," would have left me near dead.

My Israeli colleague said, "I thought you didn't speak Dutch." I shrugged and said that I didn't.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 1:50 PM on August 17, 2012 [8 favorites]


Regarding the sex toys, I love the idea of a society so accepting and unashamed about sex that it's normal for post-pubescent girls (or boys) to have them.

This is a fun prank. I would probably have been far less of a good sport about it, so good on the young man for being reasonably cool about it.
posted by maxwelton at 1:53 PM on August 17, 2012 [1 favorite]


The porn stash is his browsing history

This is a porn 'stache.
posted by sharpener at 2:00 PM on August 17, 2012


I thought bedazzling the vibrator was a nice touch.

Nah, they come that way out of the box.
posted by Sockenpuppe at 2:07 PM on August 17, 2012 [1 favorite]


Leuk!
posted by humboldt32 at 2:19 PM on August 17, 2012


Ha. Very good Ricochet!
posted by joost de vries at 2:24 PM on August 17, 2012


"You know, I think I'm too lazy to change all this back to normal. That is the real issue..."

It is a bit overwhelming.
posted by homunculus at 2:28 PM on August 17, 2012


My favorite line from the younger brother: "It's really well done too..."

Mine, too. I thought his reaction was great!
posted by bluefly at 3:09 PM on August 17, 2012


I'd love to see the picture he recoiled from, I assume a photoshop of him as a girl.
posted by L'Estrange Fruit at 3:22 PM on August 17, 2012


What? I didn't see where they swapped his bitchin CPU for a Hello Kitty model!

Otherwise ... well done!
posted by Twang at 6:27 PM on August 17, 2012


Holy shit.

The devil is in the details, indeed.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 10:27 PM on August 17, 2012


I liked the kid. I want a younger brother like him.
(I don't have facebook.)
posted by Kerasia at 10:49 PM on August 17, 2012


We sort of did this to a roommate in college. Nowhere near as well done - we just covered his room in 40 bucks worth of pages ripped from magazines for preteen girls, and a bit of softcore gay porn as well. We covered the whole room. He retaliated by leaving all of it up and never closing his door. Eventually we got really tired of explaining the whole thing to every single person who ever visited the house.
posted by tempythethird at 4:30 AM on August 18, 2012 [1 favorite]



The Dutch are extremely prolific in appropriating English phrases verbatim, to the endless dismay of many language purists.


Some Englishmen are QUITE dismayed at the Dutch.
posted by snottydick at 8:00 AM on August 20, 2012


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