Paid for by the cat.....
September 19, 2012 11:39 AM Subscribe
Proof that cats are better than dogs.
Please do not allow your dog to watch this, it will depress the dog. Your cat, however, will just sit and nod it's head knowingly.
That did not go where I thought it was going to go, and the result was delightful.
And I mean that unironically.
posted by Narrative Priorities at 11:45 AM on September 19, 2012
And I mean that unironically.
posted by Narrative Priorities at 11:45 AM on September 19, 2012
Fairness and balance is all you can ask for in reporting.
posted by mule98J at 11:46 AM on September 19, 2012 [4 favorites]
posted by mule98J at 11:46 AM on September 19, 2012 [4 favorites]
My lazy cats could not be bothered to watch the video. When I tried to get their attention, two of them ignored me and the other one lazily only shifted her eyes to look at the screen and then closed them in disinterest.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 11:46 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
posted by MaryDellamorte at 11:46 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
I watched this three minutes until I realized that my speakers were off and that there was, in fact, sound. I was perfectly happy just seeing the pictures go by. Perhaps because I am a dog.
posted by bicyclefish at 11:46 AM on September 19, 2012 [25 favorites]
posted by bicyclefish at 11:46 AM on September 19, 2012 [25 favorites]
Are you sitting in poop?
posted by bonehead at 11:47 AM on September 19, 2012 [5 favorites]
posted by bonehead at 11:47 AM on September 19, 2012 [5 favorites]
This is their boss.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 11:48 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 11:48 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
TOXOPLASMA SAYS PURRING MAKES YOU HAPPY YOU OBEY BRAIN FLUKE NOW HUMAN GO TO INTERNETS AND LOL TO OTHERS TOXOPLASMA COMMANDS YOU
posted by mhoye at 11:49 AM on September 19, 2012 [28 favorites]
posted by mhoye at 11:49 AM on September 19, 2012 [28 favorites]
That was the most enjoyable 3:20 I have spent today. Perhaps ever.
posted by fancyoats at 11:51 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
posted by fancyoats at 11:51 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
There is a higher incidence than I would like of drunk and high dogs in my neighborhood. NO I DO NOT WANT A BEER IT IS NINE AM
posted by Kitteh at 11:53 AM on September 19, 2012
posted by Kitteh at 11:53 AM on September 19, 2012
Get your own blo.....oooh, a kitty!
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 11:56 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 11:56 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
Is that Ze Frank narrating?
Yep. He's done lots of videos for buzzfeed. And apparently works for them now.
posted by DigDoug at 11:57 AM on September 19, 2012
Yep. He's done lots of videos for buzzfeed. And apparently works for them now.
posted by DigDoug at 11:57 AM on September 19, 2012
My older cat is so well-versed in Habermas, he sits on it.
My younger cat has been teaching me la langue de miaouaip, and this evening I finally noticed distinct progress when, after asking her "were you good today?" I was able to understand her matter-of-fact reply: "Mwope." The trove of catnip strewn about the living room floor made sense in that context.
posted by fraula at 12:00 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
My younger cat has been teaching me la langue de miaouaip, and this evening I finally noticed distinct progress when, after asking her "were you good today?" I was able to understand her matter-of-fact reply: "Mwope." The trove of catnip strewn about the living room floor made sense in that context.
posted by fraula at 12:00 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
Despite their many disadvantages, dogs are still superior to some cats and their humans, as they know a possessive its does not have an apostrophe. They now quietly feel smug.
posted by MartinWisse at 12:01 PM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]
posted by MartinWisse at 12:01 PM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]
I'm still not voting for Willard Mittens Catney!
posted by TwelveTwo at 12:04 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by TwelveTwo at 12:04 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
Is that Ze Frank narrating?
Yeah, but he's narrating in the style of Werner Herzog, so there's that.
posted by disillusioned at 12:05 PM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]
Yeah, but he's narrating in the style of Werner Herzog, so there's that.
posted by disillusioned at 12:05 PM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]
My cat left me for a younger, richer, better looking human after I supported him (financially and emotionally) through the four years it took him to get his doctorate in electrical engineering. Everyone knows the really smart cookies study quantum physics and astronomy, and it doesn't take them four years to get their lousy PhD. And a "better" being wouldn't be so ungrateful and abandon their human after they sacrificed so much of their time and money putting them through school.
posted by Devils Slide at 12:08 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by Devils Slide at 12:08 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
jcreigh: Is that Ze Frank narrating?
Yes, 50$, the same as in town, Reverend.
posted by IAmBroom at 12:10 PM on September 19, 2012
Yes, 50$, the same as in town, Reverend.
posted by IAmBroom at 12:10 PM on September 19, 2012
The cat would've used the right "its", presumably
posted by spinn at 12:10 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
posted by spinn at 12:10 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
God, cats are so much better than dogs. SO much better.
posted by 8dot3 at 12:19 PM on September 19, 2012
posted by 8dot3 at 12:19 PM on September 19, 2012
These dogs are drunk. And high. And they don't have a license.
posted by lakersfan1222 at 12:23 PM on September 19, 2012 [5 favorites]
posted by lakersfan1222 at 12:23 PM on September 19, 2012 [5 favorites]
lakersfan1222: These dogs are drunk. And high. And they don't have a license.That part confused me. Is it bad, doing that?
posted by IAmBroom at 12:28 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
I know it's its, I was testing you.
posted by HuronBob at 12:31 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by HuronBob at 12:31 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
That guy's comic timing is exquisite.
If laughing your ass off really worked, I'd be much lighter, post-video.
posted by Malor at 12:33 PM on September 19, 2012
If laughing your ass off really worked, I'd be much lighter, post-video.
posted by Malor at 12:33 PM on September 19, 2012
Say "bad dog" and everyone pictures an abashed dog.
Say "bad cat" and everyone looks at you as blankly as the cat does.
QED
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 12:34 PM on September 19, 2012 [4 favorites]
Say "bad cat" and everyone looks at you as blankly as the cat does.
QED
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 12:34 PM on September 19, 2012 [4 favorites]
8dot3: "God, cats are so much better than dogs. SO much better."
Factcheck.dog says no.
posted by workerant at 12:45 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
Factcheck.dog says no.
posted by workerant at 12:45 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
Ugh, cat people.
posted by mrnutty at 12:47 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by mrnutty at 12:47 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
If BuzzFeed represents Cat People, which site is for Dog People? (DON'T say Reddit, HuffPo or Boing2. Cracked already has a column titled "Let Me Tell You About My Cats". And Drudge is totally for ferrets and weasels.)
posted by oneswellfoop at 1:27 PM on September 19, 2012
posted by oneswellfoop at 1:27 PM on September 19, 2012
And Drudge is totally for ferrets and weasels
The Mustelid-American community resents your insinuations.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 1:44 PM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]
The Mustelid-American community resents your insinuations.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 1:44 PM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]
That video wins the Internet. I'm sitting here after having watched it three times in a row, and the third go around had me in tears from the belly laughs. Fucking hysterical.
posted by dbiedny at 1:49 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by dbiedny at 1:49 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
Dogs hug you when they want something; my cats hug each other -- and they are still doing it to emotionally manipulate me into doing something because they've realized it's my weak point.
Fuck, I love them so much.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 3:18 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
Fuck, I love them so much.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 3:18 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]
I look forward to the rebuttal.
If it's coming from a dog, it will involve actual butts....
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:44 PM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]
If it's coming from a dog, it will involve actual butts....
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:44 PM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]
The "hammered dulcimer" line was a piece of perfection.
posted by yoink at 5:57 PM on September 19, 2012 [4 favorites]
posted by yoink at 5:57 PM on September 19, 2012 [4 favorites]
That was a delightful thing to watch after a very busy day feeling physically lousy at work. Completely changed my evening. Thanks much for posting!
posted by hippybear at 6:19 PM on September 19, 2012
posted by hippybear at 6:19 PM on September 19, 2012
My expert opinion and experience indicate that dogs are great if you like to talk to your pet. Cats are great if you like to pet your pet.
posted by DU at 6:23 PM on September 19, 2012
posted by DU at 6:23 PM on September 19, 2012
Walking the cat ...
Ha! Both my cats are leash and harness trained, although only one of them will actually go for walks. We don't let either of them roam free outdoors, but they do both like to be outside, so we have a lead running across our backyard which the one cat loves to be out on, while the other one is content to just be on our front porch. (He doesn't really like open sky spaces, so in the backyard he mostly hides under bushes and gets his leash tangled in annoying ways.)
But the one cat, oh my goodness. She's VERY good at doing a walk up the back alley and then looping back up to the street in front of the house and back down to the backyard again. If she had her druthers, we'd take her on lengthy exploring walks all over the neighborhood, but we don't do that much so it's always a special treat for her.
The thing about having a leash-walk-trained cat is, cats aren't really made for endurance strolling. They get tired out easily after even medium length bouts of steady walking, and have to stop to rest more and more frequently as the walk gets longer and longer.
Happily, my go-for-walks cat is also (largely self-)trained to ride on my shoulder like a parrot or a wizard's familiar or what have you. So when she gets too tired, I pick her up, put her on my shoulder, and she sits there perfectly content while I make my way back to the house. This tends to draw attention, as people generally don't see a cat riding on someone's shoulder, just sitting there like it's what she was born to do.
I think the people in my neighborhood are getting more used to the sight, but I live 6 blocks from a university and the population here turns over regularly so there's always a new batch of people who stop and stare, literally agape at the sight.
It's great fun.
posted by hippybear at 6:40 PM on September 19, 2012 [14 favorites]
Ha! Both my cats are leash and harness trained, although only one of them will actually go for walks. We don't let either of them roam free outdoors, but they do both like to be outside, so we have a lead running across our backyard which the one cat loves to be out on, while the other one is content to just be on our front porch. (He doesn't really like open sky spaces, so in the backyard he mostly hides under bushes and gets his leash tangled in annoying ways.)
But the one cat, oh my goodness. She's VERY good at doing a walk up the back alley and then looping back up to the street in front of the house and back down to the backyard again. If she had her druthers, we'd take her on lengthy exploring walks all over the neighborhood, but we don't do that much so it's always a special treat for her.
The thing about having a leash-walk-trained cat is, cats aren't really made for endurance strolling. They get tired out easily after even medium length bouts of steady walking, and have to stop to rest more and more frequently as the walk gets longer and longer.
Happily, my go-for-walks cat is also (largely self-)trained to ride on my shoulder like a parrot or a wizard's familiar or what have you. So when she gets too tired, I pick her up, put her on my shoulder, and she sits there perfectly content while I make my way back to the house. This tends to draw attention, as people generally don't see a cat riding on someone's shoulder, just sitting there like it's what she was born to do.
I think the people in my neighborhood are getting more used to the sight, but I live 6 blocks from a university and the population here turns over regularly so there's always a new batch of people who stop and stare, literally agape at the sight.
It's great fun.
posted by hippybear at 6:40 PM on September 19, 2012 [14 favorites]
hippybear: "Ha! Both my cats are leash and harness trained, although only one of them will actually go for walks. We don't let either of them roam free outdoors, but they do both like to be outside, so we have a lead running across our backyard which the one cat loves to be out on, while the other one is content to just be on our front porch. "
hippybear, you're my new hero! We've tried a few times to train the cat to work the leash and harness, but it almost always ends in tears or like this.
posted by barnacles at 6:45 PM on September 19, 2012 [4 favorites]
hippybear, you're my new hero! We've tried a few times to train the cat to work the leash and harness, but it almost always ends in tears or like this.
posted by barnacles at 6:45 PM on September 19, 2012 [4 favorites]
I think the reason we were successful with our cats was that we started them as soon as we got them with the harnesses. The first cat was barely weaned when we got her, and for the first couple of years we didn't leave the harness on her full time, and when she wanted to go out she'd lie down and patiently let us buckle both parts of the harness, and then immediately get up and walk to the door where we clipped the leash on and out we went.
The second cat was a bit older, and while he took to the harness immediately and loves being out on his leash, he really REALLY doesn't like wide-open spaces so he's very content to be in his front porch space with steps and a big juniper tree to sit under for hours.
At this point we leave the harnesses on them full-time, so it's a lot less hassle to get them ready to go out. They each seem to be kind of weirded out the few times I take the harness off for some reason; it must be odd to be "naked" like that for them.
Anyway, enough derail. Cats are better than dogs, period.
posted by hippybear at 6:56 PM on September 19, 2012
The second cat was a bit older, and while he took to the harness immediately and loves being out on his leash, he really REALLY doesn't like wide-open spaces so he's very content to be in his front porch space with steps and a big juniper tree to sit under for hours.
At this point we leave the harnesses on them full-time, so it's a lot less hassle to get them ready to go out. They each seem to be kind of weirded out the few times I take the harness off for some reason; it must be odd to be "naked" like that for them.
Anyway, enough derail. Cats are better than dogs, period.
posted by hippybear at 6:56 PM on September 19, 2012
The one time I put my first cat -- dear, deceased Winston -- on a harness and leash, it ended up looking like a game of kitten paddle ball, with the kitten being the ball.
posted by mudpuppie at 6:59 PM on September 19, 2012
posted by mudpuppie at 6:59 PM on September 19, 2012
When I was a girl I had a black cat who would happily ride on my shoulders as I rode my bicycle.
The neighbors thought it was strange.
posted by caryatid at 7:16 PM on September 19, 2012
The neighbors thought it was strange.
posted by caryatid at 7:16 PM on September 19, 2012
All you people who keep relaying cute folksy tales about your own cats: pics or GTFO. Hast thou forgotten the most sacred rule of MetaFilter?
posted by These Birds of a Feather at 9:18 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by These Birds of a Feather at 9:18 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]
Yeah, I thought about that... considered even trying to take Nancy for a walk and filming that. And then I lost ambition and realized I didn't want to create a youtube account just to upload a cat video. How cliché.
I'll try to take or find some pics tomorrow and will link them. It's bedtime now.
posted by hippybear at 9:56 PM on September 19, 2012
I'll try to take or find some pics tomorrow and will link them. It's bedtime now.
posted by hippybear at 9:56 PM on September 19, 2012
I asked my cats if I needed to obey the sacred rules and they looked at me like I'm an idiot.
posted by homunculus at 9:58 PM on September 19, 2012
posted by homunculus at 9:58 PM on September 19, 2012
I only realized it was Ze Frank from the way he says "poop."
posted by RobotHero at 11:04 PM on September 19, 2012
posted by RobotHero at 11:04 PM on September 19, 2012
That put a smile on my face. Oh wait - it's gone again...
posted by evil_esto at 1:47 AM on September 20, 2012
posted by evil_esto at 1:47 AM on September 20, 2012
My wife kept bugging me to get us a dog, and I kept saying no. (1. I've had dogs; they are great companions, but they require a lot of daily maintenance and personal attention. 2. My wife is very fastidious, and I kept trying to explain that dogs have habits that would absolutely make her crazy and guess who would get to do all the cleaning?) When our daughter started with the "Can I have a dog?" thing, I knew I had to do something. I got a cat. Absolutely the best decision I ever made.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 4:23 AM on September 20, 2012
posted by Kirth Gerson at 4:23 AM on September 20, 2012
cat sits on bicycle
The little hat just made that video.
Here are my two, steadfastly refusing to be entertaining for the camera.
posted by desjardins at 10:20 AM on September 20, 2012 [1 favorite]
The little hat just made that video.
Here are my two, steadfastly refusing to be entertaining for the camera.
posted by desjardins at 10:20 AM on September 20, 2012 [1 favorite]
You are incorrect, desjardins. That is very entertaining.
posted by sweetkid at 11:29 AM on September 20, 2012
posted by sweetkid at 11:29 AM on September 20, 2012
« Older The magnificent Andersons | A Hearing for Vavilov Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
posted by elizardbits at 11:43 AM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]