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Vampire Squid from Hell
October 9, 2012 12:42 PM   Subscribe

Vampyroteuthis infernalis, also known as the Vampire Squid from Hell. (SLYT)
posted by Leucistic Cuttlefish (30 comments total) 10 users marked this as a favorite

 
It's a poop-eater.
That's more like a Bubba-Hotep style mummy than a vampire.
posted by Seamus at 12:51 PM on October 9, 2012 [1 favorite]


Eponysterical!
posted by jillithd at 12:52 PM on October 9, 2012 [6 favorites]


I'll be in my shell.
posted by The Whelk at 12:54 PM on October 9, 2012 [6 favorites]


Okay, I love this animal, but I am tired of everything having to be a video with text.
The music doesn't fit and the scroll of the text is slow enough to be infuriating as it is not related to the images presented.
posted by Seamus at 12:54 PM on October 9, 2012 [8 favorites]


Those photophores are phenomenal!
posted by jillithd at 12:58 PM on October 9, 2012 [1 favorite]


That music sounds like something out of Earthbound. SMAAAAAAASH!! I think it fits very well though.

But yeah, that's creepy. A deep-water poop-eating cloak octopus. With headlights.
posted by JHarris at 1:02 PM on October 9, 2012 [7 favorites]


The Vampire Squid is the only sparkly vampire I have any interest in.
posted by Leucistic Cuttlefish at 1:13 PM on October 9, 2012 [6 favorites]


Metafilter: A deep-water poop-eating cloak octopus. With headlights.
posted by Chutzler at 1:16 PM on October 9, 2012


It was a fake eyed web cloaked squid sinking pooper eater
sure looks strange to me.
posted by Blue Meanie at 1:18 PM on October 9, 2012 [8 favorites]


Does Mat Taibbi know about this?
posted by Strange Interlude at 1:22 PM on October 9, 2012 [2 favorites]


It's like an Nat Geo Pop-Up video.
posted by arcticseal at 1:38 PM on October 9, 2012


Oh yes. I remember learning about these on Octonauts
posted by pipeski at 1:38 PM on October 9, 2012 [4 favorites]


Seamus: perhaps I can interest you in these selections from National Geographic? Or this one from Planet Earth (also available in "Sigourney Weaver" (seriously though who chooses anyone over David Attenborough))?

The first one has a lot of the same footage, including the CGI squid-meets-shark-meets-photophores -- probably because the French film this clip was taken from was originally produced by National Geographic.
posted by Leucistic Cuttlefish at 1:47 PM on October 9, 2012 [2 favorites]


Old sailor legends say that if it isn't attacked with a Ghosttouch weapon, there's a 1d4 chance of not dealing physic damage.
posted by griphus at 1:50 PM on October 9, 2012 [4 favorites]


That squid is going to get such an angry letter from Richard Lewis.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 1:54 PM on October 9, 2012


Is the Vampire Squid From Hell worse than the Vampire Squid of Death, or the Vampire Squid From New Hampshire?
posted by Kirth Gerson at 1:58 PM on October 9, 2012 [1 favorite]


so many cool abilities!
posted by Lipstick Thespian at 2:08 PM on October 9, 2012


You look just like a vampire squid from hell!
My heart is broken so I'm going to hell.
Bury me way down deep in hell
I'm a steel drivin' man, I want to go to hell
(etc. etc.)

Guess I'll be stuck with that song for a while now. Thanks for that, Leucistic Cuttlefish. :)
posted by bigendian at 2:35 PM on October 9, 2012


How on earth is Vampire Squid from Hell not a Cathedral song?
posted by Wolfdog at 3:00 PM on October 9, 2012


to my dying day i'll never forget its ass-pucker eyes
posted by fleacircus at 3:08 PM on October 9, 2012 [2 favorites]


I can't say how or why but I had one of those in my hand about a month ago. It is a seriously cool looking animal.
posted by photoslob at 3:18 PM on October 9, 2012


to my dying day i'll never forget its ass-pucker eyes

If you ever get a parrot, the worst possible thing to teach it to say is "eye sphincter." Just take my word for it.
posted by JHarris at 3:52 PM on October 9, 2012


to my dying day i'll never forget its ass-pucker eyes

We have those too, you know. It's just that our ass-puckers are inside our eyes. Available in a variety of colours!
posted by Sys Rq at 4:45 PM on October 9, 2012 [1 favorite]


I can't say how or why

I want to believe that someone lives a life of top secret cephalopod wrangling...
posted by SomaSoda at 5:17 PM on October 9, 2012 [4 favorites]


Also, it is apparently ICADs (International Cephalopod Awareness Days). So that's cool.
posted by SomaSoda at 5:29 PM on October 9, 2012 [2 favorites]


Why the scary name for a beautiful creature that apparently doesn't jump out of the water to suck the blood of the unwary?
posted by double block and bleed at 7:22 PM on October 9, 2012


I was surprised to learn that the vampire squid is part of a distinct order of cephalopods, and is distinct from octopuses and squids, as well as from cuttlefish. Apparently the spines are harmless.
posted by KokuRyu at 11:54 PM on October 9, 2012


In Kraken, the octopuses are saints and the squid are gods. (No one mentions cuttlefish, but I imagine that they might be a class of angel.) Given this cosmology and the fact that this is actually a member of a completely different order than squid, do we now have a devil?
posted by Hactar at 6:56 AM on October 10, 2012


Wonderful creature. However, I still yelled out, "OH FUCK" no less than three times while watching that video.
posted by tickingclock at 7:02 AM on October 10, 2012 [2 favorites]


Also, it is apparently ICADs (International Cephalopod Awareness Days). So that's cool.

THIS EXCITES ME SO MUCH I DON'T EVEN
posted by Leucistic Cuttlefish at 11:51 AM on October 10, 2012 [1 favorite]


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