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Bottles Beware!
October 11, 2012 9:00 PM   Subscribe

Bottles Beware! 81 plastic water bottles meet their doom. (SLYT)
posted by Monkeymoo (56 comments total) 7 users marked this as a favorite

 
I always imagined Hiro as... less white.
posted by b1tr0t at 9:07 PM on October 11, 2012


I'm not sure that it's okay for us to watch stuff like this just for laughs. That's a person, after all.
posted by broadway bill at 9:08 PM on October 11, 2012 [10 favorites]


I cannot believe that guy made it through 81 bottles while keeping all his digits. I was just waiting and cringing and waiting...
posted by matt_od at 9:09 PM on October 11, 2012


Um, his neighbors, do they worry?
posted by mule98J at 9:11 PM on October 11, 2012 [2 favorites]


Needs a meat-boot.
posted by Grimgrin at 9:13 PM on October 11, 2012


That does it. I'm buying a sword tomorrow, and a knife, and a little sword, and something pointy, and a lot of water, a LOT of water, and a video camera, and a minion to film it all.
posted by HuronBob at 9:13 PM on October 11, 2012 [2 favorites]


Repeat
posted by Confess, Fletch at 9:14 PM on October 11, 2012


If someone asked me, "hey, you wanna watch me slice water bottles in half with a sword?" I would say YES PLEASE. I commend him for practicing and then recording it. I would only ask that he film in high-speed next time.
posted by not_on_display at 9:14 PM on October 11, 2012 [4 favorites]


I enjoyed watching that and I like how the video helpfully tells us where we can purchase the pug t-shirt. Some of the bottle attacks looked goofy but some of them were sort of clearly doing something sophisticated that I could only sort of understand. Geeks are interesting.
posted by jessamyn at 9:18 PM on October 11, 2012 [3 favorites]


Man, recycling programs have changed a lot since I was a kid.
posted by Joey Michaels at 9:25 PM on October 11, 2012 [2 favorites]


The only way this video could be better is if he was wearing a terrycloth bathrobe the whole time.
posted by Sternmeyer at 9:28 PM on October 11, 2012 [1 favorite]


I agree that this guy is going to lose a digit (or a head) at some point.
posted by goethean at 9:36 PM on October 11, 2012


Kill Bill, volume 2... hundred milliliters.
posted by rh at 9:41 PM on October 11, 2012


Well, the guy's name is Will Keith and he reposted this edit to his own channel, where, in addition to several more bottle murder videos, he has a video of his homemade longbow made from PVC pipe, string and hockey tape. He also wears a duct tape hat and deals with some personal questions in the comments with good grace.

Also: crossbow, Diet Coke and mentos.
posted by maudlin at 9:41 PM on October 11, 2012 [2 favorites]


He clearly got better at it as it went on. You are on the right road, grasshopper!
posted by Curious Artificer at 9:45 PM on October 11, 2012


And to think, some people consider drinking bottled water to be wasteful!
posted by Matt Oneiros at 9:46 PM on October 11, 2012 [3 favorites]


So, when global water shortages bring about the end of civilization, will he be sorry for having wasted all this water, or happy he's now a bad-ass swordsman?
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 9:52 PM on October 11, 2012 [5 favorites]


He has some pretty good form!
posted by ShawnStruck at 10:29 PM on October 11, 2012 [1 favorite]


I like some of the no-look slices. The " I don't even need to look to kill you" is always the ultimate in sword movie badassery.

I love guys like this. Zero fucks given. I wish I could slice some shit up with Ninja swords.
posted by Ad hominem at 10:31 PM on October 11, 2012 [4 favorites]


Also, the pug face shirt is beast.

I only refer to it as beast as I suspect a guy who slices shit up with swords all day calls everyting cool "beast"

There is allegedly a grumpy cat version coming out soon.
posted by Ad hominem at 10:38 PM on October 11, 2012


I could feel for the guy in the strokes where the target in question was only minimally disturbed... I imagined him being all, "Yeah! Subtle cut!"
posted by Graygorey at 10:40 PM on October 11, 2012


Some folk never outgrow this:
mat cutting demo.

I love guys like this. Zero fucks given. I wish I could slice some shit up with Ninja swords.

You might have a local Iaido dojo.
posted by sebastienbailard at 10:41 PM on October 11, 2012 [1 favorite]


I'm not sure that it's okay for us to watch stuff like this just for laughs. That's a person, after all.

Likewise. Apart from anything else, he does seem to know a thing or two about decent technique for cutting things up with swords.

And on the other hand, I feel uncomfortable being amused by a guy who occasionally cuts things up with swords while wearing a Naruto headband and a hoodie.
posted by figurant at 10:53 PM on October 11, 2012


There is! And they have a 20$ intro class where they hook you up with a loaner sword. I don't know if all that discipline is for me though. They would probably make me study for years before letting me attack water bottles.
posted by Ad hominem at 10:56 PM on October 11, 2012


Guy's got the chops but I can't help but wonder if there's a fedora somewhere in his wardrobe.

Actually, a guy in a fedora cutting up things with a sword sounds kinda awesome. "WHAT?! Say something about my fedora! *thumb pushes up on hilt of sheathed samurai sword* SAY SOMETHING ABOUT MY FEDORA!"
posted by KingEdRa at 11:03 PM on October 11, 2012 [2 favorites]


I couldn't help thinking back 32 years, to my trip through the Sahara, and wonder how the people I saw and met there in that water-scarce land would react to such wanton waste.

I reckon they'd be aghast.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 11:09 PM on October 11, 2012


Seems like a dude just really enjoying himself. Good for him.
posted by Jibuzaemon at 11:12 PM on October 11, 2012 [1 favorite]


What's his accent? I can't place it.
posted by cosmic.osmo at 11:29 PM on October 11, 2012


I love how for a second I thought he was dressed like a ninja, but no, he's just wearing a Carhartt hoodie.
posted by phaedon at 11:38 PM on October 11, 2012


Once again, Legolas, I see you've brought an Arrowhead to a sword fight.
posted by ShutterBun at 11:43 PM on October 11, 2012


In his defence, the water bottle was being kind of a dick.
posted by anonymisc at 11:56 PM on October 11, 2012 [2 favorites]


He has some pretty good form!

It's weird actually. Some of his form is excellent and some is horrendous. He does a very impressive draw and in general when he's doing one bottle he's looking good, but when there are multiple bottles he starts chopping instead of slicing. If you're going to do that you might as well get a broadsword.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 12:00 AM on October 12, 2012


"Without a word, the water slash him through the heart. I loved my father, so naturally I challenged his murderer to a duel. I fail.
When I was a-strong enough, I dedicated my life to the study of fencing, so the next time we meet, I will not fail."
posted by anonymisc at 12:02 AM on October 12, 2012 [2 favorites]


So THAT'S what happened to the Star Wars Kid.
posted by Optamystic at 12:51 AM on October 12, 2012


I was imagining how much fun his neighbors were having, peeking through the curtains at this, until I realized that it's a "compilation of videos."
posted by ActingTheGoat at 12:59 AM on October 12, 2012


What's his accent? I can't place it.

Maritime Canada maybe. Boston. Quaker whaler captain.
posted by stbalbach at 1:04 AM on October 12, 2012


Kudos to the man who says: "I'd rather give a bottle in front of me a frontal lobotomy."
posted by ShutterBun at 1:30 AM on October 12, 2012


Watching some of his other videos, it's really bugging me that I can't place his accent at all. Hope me?
posted by Dysk at 1:43 AM on October 12, 2012


Reminded me of watching Wartime Farm last week on BBC. The 'Lumber Jills', bless their hearts, were trying so valiantly to buck up some lumber. It was excruciating to watch.
posted by humboldt32 at 2:09 AM on October 12, 2012


This guy ruins our company picnic every year.
posted by architactor at 3:12 AM on October 12, 2012 [1 favorite]


Not to be "that guy" but couldn't he have used some gunpowder? Explosions are so much more fun than slashie slashes. Or maybe use tomato juice instead of water.
posted by InsertNiftyNameHere at 4:19 AM on October 12, 2012


I'm not sure that it's okay for us to watch stuff like this just for laughs. That's a person, after all.

I thought this for about 20 seconds and then realized: there's no pity here. This guy is good. Try to look past his unusual appearance.
posted by zardoz at 4:33 AM on October 12, 2012 [1 favorite]


I'm not sure that it's okay for us to watch stuff like this just for laughs. That's a person, after all.
I think it's just the guy's appearance that makes you feel like this. Which means that aren't you actually discriminating against him because of the way he looks? If he resembled your Average Joe then would that make it all right to laugh?
posted by Monkeymoo at 5:13 AM on October 12, 2012


What's his accent? I can't place it.

I'm reasonably certain that it's a Nova Scotia accent given the Goidelic elements in what otherwise appears to be North American inflection.
posted by Mayor Curley at 5:21 AM on October 12, 2012 [1 favorite]


dude's got some SERIOUS CHOPS
posted by rebent at 5:53 AM on October 12, 2012


Oh, this is very helpful! I just added bbillyk to my list. Now all I need is an explosives expert and a master of disguise.
posted by orme at 6:01 AM on October 12, 2012 [2 favorites]


Metafilter: The Best of BoingBoing.
posted by clvrmnky at 6:47 AM on October 12, 2012


When I was little, my father was famous. He was the greatest samurai in the empire, and he was the Shogun's water decapitator. He cut off the tops of 81 bottles for the Shogun.

It was a bad time for the empire. The Shogun just stayed inside his castle and he never came out. People said his brain was infected by devils, and that he was rotting with evil. The Shogun said the water bottles were not loyal. He said he had a lot of enemies, but he broke more bottles than that. It was a bad time.

Everybody living in fear, but still we were happy. My father would come home to mother, and when he had seen her, he would forget about the cutting. He wasn't scared of the Shogun, but the Shogun was scared of him. Maybe that was the problem. At night, mother would sing for us, while father would go into his temple and pray for peace. He'd pray for things to get better.

Then, one night the Shogun sent his ninja spies to our house. They were supposed to kill my father, but they didn't. That was the night everything changed, forever. That was when my father left his samurai life and became a demon. He became an assassin who walks the road of vengeance. And he took me with him.

I don't remember most of this myself. I only remember the Shogun's ninja hunting us wherever we go. And the bottles falling. And the water.
posted by Ice Cream Socialist at 7:33 AM on October 12, 2012 [2 favorites]


Metafilter: The Best of BoingBoing.
I really wish I wasn't so vain to be bothering to point out that I posted it before Boing Boing did. All the authorative looking info they provide is merely cut and pasted from the Youtube page. Maybe they saw it here? Who knows or cares? As I said I really wish I wasn't so vain...
posted by Monkeymoo at 8:33 AM on October 12, 2012 [2 favorites]


A little red food coloring and this would have been epically more epic.
posted by OHenryPacey at 10:06 AM on October 12, 2012


You could do worse in life then find a hobby that you enjoy, practice it and share the results with the world. As long as you aren't cutting up baby otters or something. Water bottles are fine.
posted by ChrisHartley at 10:44 AM on October 12, 2012


I think it's just the guy's appearance that makes you feel like this. Which means that aren't you actually discriminating against him because of the way he looks? If he resembled your Average Joe then would that make it all right to laugh?


To be honest, I didn't have much reaction at all. However, this video started going viral a day or two ago (reddit, boingboing, etc), and I think we all know why. So, I was just noting that--in my mind, at least--metafilter usually distinguishes itself from the herd by not really taking part in that sort of virality. I'm not mad at anyone for enjoying it for whatever reason, just making a note that I was not totally certain it was a good thing.
posted by broadway bill at 11:35 AM on October 12, 2012


I've never swung a sword at a water bottle. Is what he's doing particularly difficult, to the point that so many people are admiring his skill with a sword?
posted by ShutterBun at 11:46 AM on October 12, 2012


It's the repetition, the variety of weapons, the alley setup, and yes, his chubbiness that make it somewhat hypnotic. And funny. 81 freaking times.
posted by joseppi7 at 11:54 AM on October 12, 2012


I hope my son never sees this. He's been pestering us to let him make a sword for the last couple of years. This Summer he was showing us his form at the dining room table, and he accidentally caught the top of the bottle of soy sauce and neatly lopped it off ...with an Ordinary Kitchen Knife!
posted by sneebler at 7:15 PM on October 12, 2012


When the Internet was young and so was I, I would laugh at this fat man and his silly hobby. But now that the Internet and I are old, I see that we are all fat men will silly hobbies. He's just willing to share.
posted by chairface at 3:36 PM on October 18, 2012 [3 favorites]


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