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uromancy
October 23, 2012 11:32 PM   Subscribe

Urine flavor wheels of yore.
posted by latkes (43 comments total) 25 users marked this as a favorite

 
I... This... Bodies sure are strange. I have to admit that I have smelled diabetic pee one urinal over. And I can pick up a lower GI bleed about a block away.

I hoped computer programming would help me forget all that. Maybe if I learn node.js and go at the same time.

If there is anything ANYTHING strange in your pee or poo just get it checked out. Seriously. None of that stuff is good. Except asparagus. That is fine.
posted by poe at 11:45 PM on October 23, 2012 [1 favorite]


poe: "And I can pick up a lower GI bleed about a block away."

Yeah, I... I don't actually believe you're delivering a candygram.
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 11:51 PM on October 23, 2012 [4 favorites]


I'll pass
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 12:11 AM on October 24, 2012 [4 favorites]


I've been told that around the corner, fudge is made.
posted by bardic at 12:29 AM on October 24, 2012 [11 favorites]


There was a House episode that featured urine tasting for diagnostic purposes. Of course, they had to come up with the most extreme circumstances to work that one in -- the patient was stranded in an antarctic research station during a harsh winter. That was their post-Superbowl episode and I guess they were really going all out.
posted by Rhomboid at 12:31 AM on October 24, 2012


This seems like just the thing to hang on a wall in the waiting room, over at the urologist's. Thanx!
posted by ouke at 12:44 AM on October 24, 2012


I don’t get lasagna pee, or fresh baked apple pie pee...nooo
... all it takes is one little bite of asparagus and my pee
smells of the aforementioned all day long! I think this is one
of those intelligent design things that got left off the drawing board.
posted by quazichimp at 12:46 AM on October 24, 2012


The practice, called uroscopy or uromancy,

Uromancy. Definitely not myromancy.
posted by three blind mice at 1:10 AM on October 24, 2012 [4 favorites]


This is taking the piss.

Somebody was going to say it.
posted by Segundus at 1:13 AM on October 24, 2012 [2 favorites]


Is this a new discovery? My abiding impression is that these descriptions have been secretly incorporated into the tasting notes of wine critics some time ago.
posted by MuffinMan at 1:18 AM on October 24, 2012 [4 favorites]


I piss egg salads.
posted by hal9k at 1:38 AM on October 24, 2012


I once went to the emergency room because I was pissing out gallons of blood. A few hours into thinking I was dying I recalled eating my weight in beats the night before. I am just glad I remembered that before I took a poo.
posted by munchingzombie at 1:42 AM on October 24, 2012 [2 favorites]


I had a doctor who insisted that everyone's pee smells like asparagus after eating, but that not all people can smell it.
posted by thylacinthine at 2:42 AM on October 24, 2012


Related: Waiter! These eggs taste like piss!
posted by MuffinMan at 2:55 AM on October 24, 2012


I ate asparagus with some regularity in the States and never experienced the... side effects. After moving to Japan I've noticed them, with a vengeance, every time.
posted by 23 at 3:00 AM on October 24, 2012


Modafinil makes my pee smell like burnt plastic.
posted by onya at 3:32 AM on October 24, 2012


Dr. Oliver Wendell Ludwig (Harry Dean Stanton) demonstrates the taste test to his med school students (Taylor Negron, Michael McKean, and Sean Young).
posted by not_on_display at 4:19 AM on October 24, 2012 [3 favorites]


My Fisher-Price junior medical kit came with a uroscopy flask, or so I lead my brother to believe.
posted by orme at 4:48 AM on October 24, 2012 [6 favorites]


I once went to the emergency room because I was pissing out gallons of blood. A few hours into thinking I was dying I recalled eating my weight in beats the night before.

I read this to mean that you had had a really great night out at clubs or a rave or something, and I was trying to figure out how that would put blood in your urine or be reassuring. Then I was all "ooooh...."
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:11 AM on October 24, 2012 [3 favorites]


At my last job, I noticed that every time I peed I smelled a strong smell of popcorn. I swear, I was about to make a doctor's appointment when I realized that my preferred stall shared a vent with the storage area next door...in which someone (apparently a popcorn addict) had installed a microwave.
posted by JoanArkham at 6:00 AM on October 24, 2012


Those wheels need modernizing. There are 158 Answers.com results for "my pee smells like popcorn" but I can't find it on the chart.
posted by surplus at 6:03 AM on October 24, 2012 [2 favorites]


I've noticed that when I drink too much coffee my pee smells like espresso, and when I drink too much espresso my pee smells like coffee.
posted by slogger at 6:32 AM on October 24, 2012 [2 favorites]


Hm, I thought the asparagus thing was that there are people who can smell it and people who can't smell it AS WELL AS people who will have the pee smell after eating and people who will not.
posted by elizardbits at 6:32 AM on October 24, 2012


I produce artisanal microbrewed urine. It's a local, small-scale operation, and every batch is unique. Visit my booth at the farmer's market this Saturday!
posted by Metroid Baby at 6:49 AM on October 24, 2012 [11 favorites]


Someone want to enlighten me as to what the blueish urine on a couple of those charts is? What in the blazes makes you pee blue?!
posted by maryr at 7:00 AM on October 24, 2012


What in the blazes makes you pee blue?!

This is a naturally occurring result of a low metafilter user number.
posted by srboisvert at 7:07 AM on October 24, 2012 [13 favorites]


My piss sometimes comes out as shit and sometimes I will shit what looks just like piss.

I shit you not.
posted by item at 7:27 AM on October 24, 2012


so glad I dropped out of pre-med.
posted by SharkParty at 7:34 AM on October 24, 2012 [1 favorite]


"Roy, can you get sick drinking piss?"
posted by resurrexit at 7:55 AM on October 24, 2012


I glanced at the description -- the words 'flavor wheel' -- and I thought this was going to be about urinal mints. I remember way back in the day, some store managers put up signs in the bathroom that tell people not to eat the mint (I guess that was a real problem at some point.)

Public urinals usually have a plastic mesh guard, which may contain a deodorizing urinal deodorizer block or "urinal cake". The mesh is intended to prevent solid objects (such as cigarette butts, feces, chewing gum, or paper) from being flushed and possibly causing a plumbing stoppage.
posted by porn in the woods at 8:46 AM on October 24, 2012



What in the blazes makes you pee blue?!


Porphyria


Also - I always wondered why they needed so much pee for drug testing. I guess you need a good swig.
posted by louche mustachio at 8:50 AM on October 24, 2012 [1 favorite]


The term "porphyria" is derived from the Greek πορφύρα, porphyra, meaning "purple pigment". The name is likely to have been a reference to the purple discolouration of feces and urine when exposed to light in patients during an attack. - Wikipedia

Vampires pee purple. Who knew?

Thanks, louche mustachio!
posted by maryr at 9:01 AM on October 24, 2012


English physician Thomas Willis noted the same relationship in 1674, reporting that diabetic piss tastes “wonderfully sweet as if it were imbued with honey or sugar.”

WONDERFULLY sweet! That's the last thing I need. Doc comes over and takes a sip, his face lights right up, and he's all "Why, Mr. Wynde-fone! This stuff is wonderful!"
posted by nebulawindphone at 9:02 AM on October 24, 2012 [2 favorites]


What in the blazes makes you pee blue?!


This stuff?
posted by BlueHorse at 9:12 AM on October 24, 2012


Young, but fruity with an oaken finish.
posted by Pudhoho at 9:54 AM on October 24, 2012 [1 favorite]


One word: Lant.

It puts the Pee in I.P.A.
posted by sixpack at 11:29 AM on October 24, 2012 [1 favorite]


Big wheel keep on turnin'
Proud Mary keep on burning'

... until we can get that UTI treated.
posted by zippy at 11:52 AM on October 24, 2012 [2 favorites]


Metroid Baby: I produce artisanal microbrewed urine. It's a local, small-scale operation, and every batch is unique. Visit my booth at the farmer's market this Saturday!
I've had some of his pee, before it became popular.

Now I'm drinking some wino's pee - you probably haven't heard of it.
posted by IAmBroom at 12:13 PM on October 24, 2012 [2 favorites]


What in the blazes makes you pee blue?

This.
posted by novalis_dt at 7:39 PM on October 24, 2012


Hastimeha, elephant urine.
The patient continuously passes turbid urine like a mad elephant.


I ... I ... I'm actually curious to know more about mad elephants and their urination habits, now.
posted by barnacles at 9:53 PM on October 24, 2012


Those are some pissed off elephants.
posted by maryr at 10:23 PM on October 24, 2012


Yeah, we used to have that problem but then they took away the img tag.
posted by nebulawindphone at 10:52 PM on October 24, 2012


for a very short while in jr. high i was on the football team. i remember an away game we had, we'd just got there and were prepping in the locker room. one of the kids took a whiz and wow did the smell knock us all over. i don't know how concentrated that pee must have been, or what his health or diet was to pack that punch, but i had never smelled such a concentrated urine smell before or after.
posted by camdan at 1:00 AM on October 27, 2012


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