How many of your female friends keep sleeping with jerks instead of nice guys?
...it feels like progress that women/girls can do things previously societally reserved for men/boys, but how much progress have we made when men/boys still cannot have anything to do with "feminine" things? How equal do we really have a chance to be when these gender norms are still so rigidly enforced from the time we are tiny?
So many of the narratives (books, films, TV, cartoons) out there are male-driven with male main characters, and as girls we learn to adapt to this, because it's societally accepted that men are the standard, and women are lesser, not as interesting - boys don't want to watch "girl stuff", so we all have to watch boy stuff. We learn to absorb both the masculine and the feminine POVs presented, and integrate them into ourselves, but since boys are the standard, they don't have to, and what's more are actively discouraged from doing so, so how do they learn to identify with girls/women as people?
What does it do to an average boy to grow up being told over and over that girl stuff is yucky and girl stuff is wrong for boys and "don't be such a girl" and "what are you, a girl?" Then all of a sudden he hits the teenage years and the hormone rush, and now girls are good for something... one thing... they're still this mysterious, not-as-good, "other" but hot damn, do they got what men want, amirite?
Young and middle-aged adult sample. By post mail, we sent paper questionnaires to 132 male and 191 female adults around the United States. Of the adults on the mailing list, 80% were from the Midwest. We compiled the mailing list by asking students and research assistants to compile addresses of relatives, neighbors, and employers between the ages of 27 and 55. Because the median age of marriage in the US is 26 for females and 28 for males (U.S. Census Bureau, 2010), we decided that starting at age 27 would allow us to access a sample of people who were likely to have launched into marriage and full-time work. After the initial mailing and a sample-wide postcard reminder, a total of 52 men and 90 women (39% response rate for men, 47% for women) returned their questionnaire in the self-addressed, prepaid envelope that we provided. The sample ranged in age from 27 to 52 (mean ¼ 37.37). Because 95% of the sample was between the ages of 27 and 50, we termed this the ‘‘young and middle-aged adult’’ sample. Notably, the majority of the men and women in this sample were in their thirties and early forties, and 88% of the men and 91% of the women were married and thus in a similar position regarding mateship status. For analyses, then, we analyzed them together, across age, as one group to be compared with the emerging adult sample (in which no one was married). We could not compare respondents from non-respondents on age or marital status (that information was unknown for many on the original mailing list), but 80% of respondents’ envelopes were from Minnesota and Wisconsin. Further, 90% of the respondents were married, which is typical of Midwestern samples. Of the cross-sex friends described by participants, 66% were also married, and another 10% were in a serious relationship. (Only 47% of participants and 40% of the cross-sex friends that participants described had been married when the friendship began.) Although the sample was obtained through networking and thus limited in that respect, it was similar to our emerging adult sample in its Midwestern composition.
The difference between men and women is that a woman wants one man who will fulfill her every fantasy, and a man wants every woman to fulfill his one fantasy.
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