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October 30, 2012 8:52 PM   Subscribe


 
Yub nub
eee chop yub nub
ah toe meet toe pee-chee keene
g'noop dock fling oh ah
Yah wah
posted by scalefree at 9:05 PM on October 30, 2012 [3 favorites]


In the blurst of times, I can do a pretty good Teddy impression, warning others off my delicious foods/corn. Right now, with a chest cold, I can't not do a bitchin' Teddy impression, even just by inhaling. However, Teddy's not as much a gourdifile as some big cats I could mention.
posted by Cold Lurkey at 9:09 PM on October 30, 2012 [2 favorites]


What a prick!
posted by TheRedArmy at 9:10 PM on October 30, 2012 [2 favorites]


My little cat Marlowe was VERY INTERESTED in this video.
posted by sweetkid at 9:16 PM on October 30, 2012 [1 favorite]


I just fell into a youtube black hole of porcupine videos.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 9:18 PM on October 30, 2012 [5 favorites]


This shit is ridiculous. His pumpkin eating is all over the place. Pick a spot, Teddy!
posted by Foam Pants at 9:30 PM on October 30, 2012 [6 favorites]


I just learned that porcupines and beavers have orange teeth. It's not because of the pumpkin.
posted by Jode at 9:35 PM on October 30, 2012 [2 favorites]


I like the part near 0:52 where he tells the cameralady in no uncertain terms that his pumpkin is not to be touched.

Jode:I just learned that porcupines and beavers have orange teeth. It's not because of the pumpkin.

As do coypus (nutria).
posted by dhens at 9:42 PM on October 30, 2012


I just fell into a youtube black hole of porcupine videos.

I took the other path toward the Youtube black hole of baby skunk videos.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 9:50 PM on October 30, 2012


One porcupine, two FPPs.
posted by Nomyte at 10:25 PM on October 30, 2012


One porcupine, two FPPs.

Shit. I am less famous than a porcupine.
posted by tripping daisy at 10:30 PM on October 30, 2012 [3 favorites]


Those sounds teddy is making, I remember my ten year old self wandering in our tiny apple orchard one dark October night and being terrified by the sounds coming from several different trees. There'd black bears in the orchard before but not being able to find or identify the source of the sounds made it scarier than bears.
posted by the_artificer at 10:36 PM on October 30, 2012 [1 favorite]


I just learned that porcupines and beavers have orange teeth. It's not because of the pumpkin.

Of course not. Porcupine teeth are stained with the blood of their victims! Mostly "people who tried to take away the damn food, so it's a bit hard to feel too bad, in this case.
posted by GenjiandProust at 2:45 AM on October 31, 2012 [2 favorites]


I feel great love for this animal.
posted by pracowity at 2:58 AM on October 31, 2012 [3 favorites]


Honestly, as I the only one who, before watching, expecting that Teddy was going to hump that pumpkin?
posted by Mezentian at 3:51 AM on October 31, 2012


Or "was I the only one"?
Curse the edit window and its 5 minute rule!
posted by Mezentian at 4:42 AM on October 31, 2012


The noises are sort of cute, but to my ear he is saying, "Fuck off, I'm eating.".
posted by devious truculent and unreliable at 5:17 AM on October 31, 2012 [3 favorites]


It was damn cruel of Nature to make an animal so cute yet so completely unhuggable.
posted by tommasz at 5:22 AM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


My husband walked by while I was watching this. "What is that? Ewoks?"
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 5:28 AM on October 31, 2012 [2 favorites]


It was damn cruel of Nature to make an animal so cute yet so completely unhuggable.

You can bottom, you know.
posted by Mezentian at 6:42 AM on October 31, 2012


OK, I totally needed this to cut through my obsessive refreshing of all data Sandy-related. Thank you.

GET AWAY FROM MY PUMPKIN!!
posted by blurker at 7:51 AM on October 31, 2012


I just had one of those one of those crazy "wait, unicorns aren't real?" moments.

At the age of 23, I just realized that hedgehogs and porcupines are totally different species. Wow. Mind blown.

Also, porcupines sound like ewoks.
posted by arcolz at 10:06 AM on October 31, 2012 [1 favorite]


A few years ago, I was spending a week alone in a very remote cabin in southwestern New York State. Late one night, things were dark and still, when I awoke to a deafening crunching sound. Something was gnawing on the wood frame of the structure, and the sound was transmitted throughout the entire building. At the time I knew nothing of the local fauna so I responded by jumping out of bed, screaming and pounding on things as loudly as I could, hoping to scare the unknown beast away.

It stopped chewing, but then it began making sounds like this thing. Trust me. At 2 am, in the dark, alone in the woods, those mutterings are NOT CUTE. They are terrifying.
posted by kinnakeet at 10:12 AM on October 31, 2012 [2 favorites]


I HAZ AN ORANGE PUMPKIN.
posted by Leezie at 10:27 AM on October 31, 2012


It was the best of times,
It was the blurst of times,
It was the season of mini-Heath Bars,
It was the season of candy corn,

I saw the pokiest porcupines of my generation destroyed by madness,

I have eaten
the pumpkin
that was on
the ground

and which
you were probably
saving
for pie

Non, je ne regrette rien.
posted by zippy at 11:01 AM on October 31, 2012 [2 favorites]


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