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November 28, 2012 8:08 PM Subscribe
Metafilter: Left with some raw chicken parts to gnaw on
posted by gwint at 8:13 PM on November 28, 2012 [3 favorites]
posted by gwint at 8:13 PM on November 28, 2012 [3 favorites]
To be fair, Pacific Northwest alligators are known for growing pot and hiring pole dancers, so the suspect may have just been suffering from a reptile dysfunction.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 8:21 PM on November 28, 2012 [31 favorites]
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 8:21 PM on November 28, 2012 [31 favorites]
See, we don't get this in Colorado. Anymore.
posted by boo_radley at 8:24 PM on November 28, 2012 [6 favorites]
posted by boo_radley at 8:24 PM on November 28, 2012 [6 favorites]
I always heard it was boring there, guess it is true.
Yes, this is a joke about how in X, where X = city where I live, all grow ops have at least three alligators, or a tiger.
posted by Ad hominem at 8:32 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
Yes, this is a joke about how in X, where X = city where I live, all grow ops have at least three alligators, or a tiger.
posted by Ad hominem at 8:32 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
...and the alligator says to the pole dancer, "what is this, some sort of joke?"
posted by bondcliff at 8:32 PM on November 28, 2012 [7 favorites]
posted by bondcliff at 8:32 PM on November 28, 2012 [7 favorites]
NOT FLORIDA.
posted by wreckingball at 8:35 PM on November 28, 2012 [5 favorites]
posted by wreckingball at 8:35 PM on November 28, 2012 [5 favorites]
This has gotten great play in the local papers here in Olympia, my current home town, but really, I think a more purely Metafilter-esque PacificNW story is this:
"Suspects Wanted in West Seattle Ukelele Attack"
"About 9:15 p.m., Angry Ukulele Guy and a young woman, also in her early 20s, entered the gas station/convenience store near Delridge Way Southwest and Southwest Myrtle Street and tried to shoplift a six-pack of Olde English beer...The male suspect argued with the employee and then hit him over the head with a ukulele, shattering the instrument and cutting the victim’s scalp."
(Olde English Beer? Angry Ukelele Guy, I am disappoint . . .)
posted by Kat Allison at 8:40 PM on November 28, 2012 [4 favorites]
"Suspects Wanted in West Seattle Ukelele Attack"
"About 9:15 p.m., Angry Ukulele Guy and a young woman, also in her early 20s, entered the gas station/convenience store near Delridge Way Southwest and Southwest Myrtle Street and tried to shoplift a six-pack of Olde English beer...The male suspect argued with the employee and then hit him over the head with a ukulele, shattering the instrument and cutting the victim’s scalp."
(Olde English Beer? Angry Ukelele Guy, I am disappoint . . .)
posted by Kat Allison at 8:40 PM on November 28, 2012 [4 favorites]
A crime scene with two alligators, a pole dancer and pot? Where I'm from we call this "Wednesday".
posted by mosk at 8:40 PM on November 28, 2012 [4 favorites]
posted by mosk at 8:40 PM on November 28, 2012 [4 favorites]
Metafilter: Suffering from a reptile dysfunction
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 8:49 PM on November 28, 2012 [2 favorites]
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 8:49 PM on November 28, 2012 [2 favorites]
Washington State voters must bear on their collective conscience the sad fact that unemployment rates among grow-op guarding pole dancers and immigrant alligators are destined to soar.
posted by islander at 8:51 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by islander at 8:51 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
And we wonder where Kurt Cobain got his ideas...
posted by jonp72 at 8:58 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by jonp72 at 8:58 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
HuronBob: "It's absurd to think that you can protect your pot growing operation with a pole dancer"
After Gymkata, I'm sure it's only a matter of time before we get a martial arts meets poledancing - TO THE DEATH movie.
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 9:09 PM on November 28, 2012 [3 favorites]
After Gymkata, I'm sure it's only a matter of time before we get a martial arts meets poledancing - TO THE DEATH movie.
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 9:09 PM on November 28, 2012 [3 favorites]
See, we don't get this in Colorado. Anymore.
So, you're saying this was previously a common thing in Colorado?
Funny thing is, the other state to legalize weed was Washington, which is where this took place. I think that it's fair to expect the sale of pot to occur on the black market for some time to come, regardless of recent legislation. After all, it's still a federal crime.
posted by Edgewise at 9:33 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
So, you're saying this was previously a common thing in Colorado?
Funny thing is, the other state to legalize weed was Washington, which is where this took place. I think that it's fair to expect the sale of pot to occur on the black market for some time to come, regardless of recent legislation. After all, it's still a federal crime.
posted by Edgewise at 9:33 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
You could exchange a gram or an ounce for a donation of some money to you. That wouldn't holdup with the feds but if you keep receipts it may have some traction with the state. As far as I'm aware that is how some of the medical mj dispensaries work.
posted by P.o.B. at 9:47 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by P.o.B. at 9:47 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
Washington's legalization doesn't take effect for another week-and-a-half anyway.
Five miles south of Olympia really doesn't warrant a “Seattle” tag, IMHO. That's half-way to Portland.
posted by hattifattener at 9:47 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
Five miles south of Olympia really doesn't warrant a “Seattle” tag, IMHO. That's half-way to Portland.
posted by hattifattener at 9:47 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
To be fair, that's not so much 'close to Olympia' as 'close to where I fucking live'.
posted by ZaneJ. at 9:53 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by ZaneJ. at 9:53 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
Edge wise, yes both states have legalized, but it doesn't happen here any more because it's winter. Too dry in Colorado for gators. Ask again in late March.
posted by boo_radley at 10:12 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by boo_radley at 10:12 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
Officer Joel DeSpain is probably quite sad that he wasn't the one who got to write a report on that incident.
posted by symbioid at 10:17 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by symbioid at 10:17 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
"Feathe Boa" and "Tassel Pasties" we're both *this close* to putting up this FPP first.
posted by From Bklyn at 11:19 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by From Bklyn at 11:19 PM on November 28, 2012 [1 favorite]
Um, yeah, Olympia =/ Seattle. It is also not Portland. It's fucking weird ass Olympia.
posted by nonmerci at 11:49 PM on November 28, 2012 [3 favorites]
posted by nonmerci at 11:49 PM on November 28, 2012 [3 favorites]
This is why Olympia will always be more exciting than Lacey.
posted by emmling at 3:26 AM on November 29, 2012
posted by emmling at 3:26 AM on November 29, 2012
Dude, isn't everywhere more interesting than Lacey?
posted by Windopaene at 7:59 AM on November 29, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by Windopaene at 7:59 AM on November 29, 2012 [1 favorite]
Weed gators? I thought they preferred krokodil.
posted by orme at 9:21 AM on November 29, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by orme at 9:21 AM on November 29, 2012 [1 favorite]
Right out of Carl Hiaasen's play book!
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 11:51 AM on November 29, 2012
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 11:51 AM on November 29, 2012
Um, yeah, Olympia =/ Seattle. It is also not Portland. It's fucking weird ass Olympia.
Silly me. I had just transposed it in my mind by the time I got to the tags. All fixed now.
posted by HotPants at 4:39 PM on November 29, 2012
Silly me. I had just transposed it in my mind by the time I got to the tags. All fixed now.
posted by HotPants at 4:39 PM on November 29, 2012
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posted by HuronBob at 8:10 PM on November 28, 2012 [14 favorites]