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Before There Was Star Wars There Was High School
December 4, 2012 5:56 PM   Subscribe

Denis Medri (original source) envisions the original trilogy Star Wars characters as high school students and faculty.
posted by deborah (57 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite

 
Han looks too clean-cut and R2D2 isn't a nerd; he's that kind of sneaky kid that everyone knows and is kind of fond of and when the gym is mysteriously flooded no one rats him out because he's a little guy but he kicks ass. No way that robot's holding a fucking Rubik's Cube.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 6:02 PM on December 4, 2012 [10 favorites]


Nerd and sneaky kid who kicks ass aren't mutually exclusive, cf Real Genius.
posted by DU at 6:03 PM on December 4, 2012


Hogwars.
posted by Nomyte at 6:09 PM on December 4, 2012


These are good.

The Han and Chewie seems weaker than the rest. I theorize that it was the first drawing that established the concept, and then the others were done once the artist learned from it and had a better grasp of their idea.

Or, it could just be the goofy lettering of the "I shot first" shirt that is bothering me.

Still, nice project.
posted by Hicksu at 6:09 PM on December 4, 2012



I guess after the prequels and then Star Wars: Detours, nothing really matters any more in this cold dark entropied universe, so, sure, why not? Go knock yourself out, kid.


Who is the guy next to Lando supposed to be?
posted by Bwithh at 6:10 PM on December 4, 2012


Is that Luke Skywalker or Marty McFly?
posted by Sys Rq at 6:15 PM on December 4, 2012 [3 favorites]


>Who is the guy next to Lando supposed to be?

Greedo? (sp?) you know the guy who Han shot first.

Who's the obese guy next to Principal Palpatine?
posted by thermonuclear.jive.turkey at 6:16 PM on December 4, 2012


Bwithh: Greedo, maybe?
posted by BiggerJ at 6:16 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]


Who's the obese guy next to Principal Palpatine?

Probably Jabba.
posted by codacorolla at 6:17 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]


Denis Medri

Did he have Dodgson there?
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 6:17 PM on December 4, 2012 [4 favorites]


Assuming that High School Han Solo is part of a coherent storyworld universe/reality set in real 1980s America, what could his T-shirt slogan "I SHOT FIRST" possibly refer to?
posted by Bwithh at 6:18 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]


Who is the guy next to Lando supposed to be?

Definitely NOT Jar Jar Binks!
posted by birdhaus at 6:19 PM on December 4, 2012


Overall I appreciate the execution, but I agree the Han could do with another spin through the ol' re-imaginizer. In an '80s teen-movie context, I see Han as being more of a John Bender type, but a year or two older than everybody else. He'd either be a dropout or doing high school on the six-year plan, and hanging out with his old shop-class buddy Jesus "Chuey" Baca.
posted by Strange Interlude at 6:21 PM on December 4, 2012 [4 favorites]


what could his T-shirt slogan "I SHOT FIRST" possibly refer to?

Maybe an ironic response to those Frankie Goes to Hollywood "RELAX" t-shirts?
posted by muddgirl at 6:22 PM on December 4, 2012 [5 favorites]


Did they do irony yet in the 1980s? We Generation Xers invented irony, you know.
posted by Bwithh at 6:23 PM on December 4, 2012


Bwithh: Greedo, maybe?

Mmmm. Maybe, but as a punk?
posted by Bwithh at 6:24 PM on December 4, 2012


Naw, naw. Y'all got it wrong. Han Solo == Wooderson from "Dazed and Confused."

And as far as Lando's buddy in the drawing, I was secretly hoping it was Lobot.
posted by fijiwriter at 6:24 PM on December 4, 2012 [4 favorites]


The guy with Lando looks like he's supposed to be Greedo, but it's possible (and would make a little more sense) if he was meant to be Nien Nunb.

Han Solo looks awfully... twink-y. I cannot imagine Han Solo wearing shorts, ever.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 6:25 PM on December 4, 2012


Hogwars.

Begun this cross-over has.
posted by The Whelk at 6:27 PM on December 4, 2012


Naw, naw. Y'all got it wrong. Han Solo == Wooderson from "Dazed and Confused."

I'm inclined to agree with you, but that was a '90s movie that was set in the '70s, so close but no cigar.
posted by Strange Interlude at 6:29 PM on December 4, 2012


I can see why Vader is depicted as one of the students, sort of a sadistic all-star type who lords it over the other kids and reports directly to the evil principal. But then all that "I am your father" stuff goes right out the window. I think he'd make a better fit as one of the teachers.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 6:30 PM on December 4, 2012


what could his T-shirt slogan "I SHOT FIRST" possibly refer to?
From Wikipedia:

"Han shot first" is a phrase used by Star Wars fans to refer to a controversial change made to a scene in Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope. [Snip] The scene was modified for the 1997 re-release with an extra shot inserted before the smoke cloud (composed from the same shot used to show Greedo's death) of Han and Greedo each visibly firing at each other, with Greedo firing earlier by nearly a full second and missing Han at point-blank range (less than two meters away).[1][2] Thus, the phrase "Han shot first" is a retort to director George Lucas' explicit cinematic assertion that "Greedo shot first."
posted by birdhaus at 6:30 PM on December 4, 2012


I assumed the guy next to Lando was Lobot. Little screen time, no lines, but one of the awesomest characters in Empire all the same.
posted by Yesterday's camel at 6:33 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]


I think Bwithh was actually wondering what the slogan would mean in a 1980s teen-movie context. High school shootings hadn't become a thing yet, so it's gotta be something vaguely Porky's/Fast Times-esque.
posted by Strange Interlude at 6:34 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]


Teen suicide, don't do it.
posted by The Whelk at 6:38 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]


Teen suicide, don't do it.

Vader, after Luke jumps off the Cloud City railing: "I love my dead Jedi son!"
posted by Strange Interlude at 6:43 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]


Another example.
posted by srboisvert at 6:43 PM on December 4, 2012


I guess after the prequels and then Star Wars: Detours, nothing really matters any more in this cold dark entropied universe, so, sure, why not? Go knock yourself out, kid.

Does no one remember Star Wars Kinect.
That is the real horror of SW exploitation.
Although, Angry Birds comes close.
posted by Mezentian at 6:43 PM on December 4, 2012


I'm pretty sure what Bwithh ACTUALLY means is that, in the 1980s, there was no question that Han shot first, because as birdhaus pointed out via wikipedia, Greedo didn't shoot first until 1997. So he wouldn't have to wear that t-shirt unless this series was set in 1997 or later. I don't think school shootings have anything to do w/ anything here.
posted by nushustu at 6:44 PM on December 4, 2012


I think he'd make a better fit as one of the teachers.

Vader should be the coach of the football team and they could all be his stormtroopers.
posted by cazoo at 6:47 PM on December 4, 2012 [7 favorites]


Um, yeah...Han is like totally Jeff Spicoli (although the Falcon should really be an Econolline van).


also...SCREW YOU, VICE PRINCIPAL TARKIN!


sorry, I've been waiting for years to say that
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 6:52 PM on December 4, 2012 [6 favorites]


I'm pretty sure what Bwithh ACTUALLY means is that, in the 1980s, there was no question that Han shot first, because as birdhaus pointed out via wikipedia, Greedo didn't shoot first until 1997. So he wouldn't have to wear that t-shirt unless this series was set in 1997 or later. I don't think school shootings have anything to do w/ anything here.
posted by nushustu at 6:44 PM on December 4 [+] [!]


Wait, what? You mean to tell me that in THIS 1980s universe, Star Wars simultaneously both exists as a major movie franchise AND as the inherent (not just accessorized) identities of real life high school students and faculty - possibly in a way that they are aware of? In THIS 1980s universe, are there grounds for a lucrative lawsuit by the students and faculty of Star Wars High against Lucasfilm?
posted by Bwithh at 6:54 PM on December 4, 2012 [3 favorites]


Um, yeah...Han is like totally Jeff Spicoli

I heard he made a pizza run in less than 12 parsecs.
posted by Strange Interlude at 7:04 PM on December 4, 2012 [3 favorites]


MOS EISLEY HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL RULES!
posted by Strange Interlude at 7:05 PM on December 4, 2012 [6 favorites]


I'm no expert but I see Han in a souped up El Camino in black matte auto primer.
posted by Morrigan at 7:23 PM on December 4, 2012 [1 favorite]


First picture reminds me of Megas XLR.
posted by curious nu at 7:49 PM on December 4, 2012


Vader needs to be holding a sequencer in front of his chest.
posted by ODiV at 8:13 PM on December 4, 2012


This is the same artist that did the Rockabilly Batman, if you click around his Deviantart page. Those work better IMO.
posted by emjaybee at 8:13 PM on December 4, 2012


MOS EISLEY HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL RULES DROOLS!

Nerf Herder!

GO TASHI STATION BANTHAS!
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 9:17 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]


Toshi Station Power, surely?

They convert trys to goals.
posted by Mezentian at 9:35 PM on December 4, 2012


Vader needs to be holding a sequencer in front of his chest.

Are you suggesting Vader is a member of ΛΛΛ?

'Cause, like, no. Vader is AB through and through.
posted by Sys Rq at 9:42 PM on December 4, 2012


Jabba needs to be a fat, rich crime boss' kid. No way is he sweeping fucking floors.
posted by Jilder at 11:17 PM on December 4, 2012 [2 favorites]


It's a crime family. Jabba's working his way up, learnin' the ropes from his old man who runs the local deli/greasy spoon/bar/whatever.
posted by Mezentian at 12:47 AM on December 5, 2012


Han Solo looks awfully... twink-y. I cannot imagine Han Solo wearing shorts, ever.

Yeah, those shorts are awfully short. I guess when he said smuggler he meant rentboy.
posted by ennui.bz at 4:24 AM on December 5, 2012


I can see why Vader is depicted as one of the students, sort of a sadistic all-star type who lords it over the other kids and reports directly to the evil principal.

Vader is the sadistic gym teacher who's constantly scheming with the jerkface Principal Palpatine. Together, they try to keep the Rebel Alliance (who are similar to the Dead Poets Society) from reaching out with their feelings because adults fear what would happen if young people weren't kept in their place.

I suppose the real question is: what's the Death Star? A big Anti-Truancy Patrol paddywagon that's also a transformer?
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 6:04 AM on December 5, 2012


>what's the Death Star?

the *school*, of course...
posted by thermonuclear.jive.turkey at 6:18 AM on December 5, 2012


ROU_Xenophobe: what's the Death Star?

Maybe a newer, bigger regional school with enhanced security cameras and EZ-Search brand lockers that will cripple these damn punks and their so-called "Rebel Alliance". Possibly it's the High School and our little band of misfits are all rising Frosh?
posted by Rock Steady at 6:27 AM on December 5, 2012 [1 favorite]


I envision it looking something like this, but maybe with black bricks instead of red.
posted by Rock Steady at 6:29 AM on December 5, 2012


Yeah, those shorts are awfully short. I guess when he said smuggler he meant rentboy.

Everyone wore shorts like that in the early '80s. Example.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 6:40 AM on December 5, 2012 [1 favorite]


TheWhiteSkull: Everyone wore shorts like that in the early '80s.

Yup. Just check out NBA highlights.
posted by Rock Steady at 7:49 AM on December 5, 2012


the *school*, of course...

Naw, it needs to move around and shoot down the Rebel Alliance branches at Alderaan High and Dantooine Tech.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:41 AM on December 5, 2012


Wet Hot Imperial Deathstar
posted by codacorolla at 10:19 AM on December 5, 2012 [4 favorites]


"...what we found out is that each one of us is a droid, a farmboy, a gambler, a princess, and a scoundrel...Does that answer your question? Sincerely, the Rebel Alliance."
posted by Strange Interlude at 12:59 PM on December 5, 2012 [5 favorites]


Han Solo looks awfully... twink-y. I cannot imagine Han Solo wearing shorts, ever.

Yeah, those shorts are awfully short. I guess when he said smuggler he meant rentboy
budgie smuggler.
posted by Sparx at 1:03 PM on December 5, 2012 [1 favorite]


Strange Interlude: "...what we found out is that each one of us is a droid, a farmboy, a gambler, a princess, and a scoundrel...Does that answer your question? Sincerely, the Rebel Alliance."

OMG I want a Breakfast Club/Star Wars mashup so bad now.
posted by Rock Steady at 1:21 PM on December 5, 2012 [1 favorite]


There is totally already a Breakfast Club/Star Wars mashup!!! It's in Star Wars Tales 19, and it's The Rebel Club.
posted by redsparkler at 1:33 PM on December 5, 2012 [2 favorites]


Thanks, redsparkler. I'm gratified to see that I'm not the only one to make the Han-Bender connection.
posted by Strange Interlude at 1:47 PM on December 5, 2012


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