Comments on: Fartbarf, Neon Piss, and more!

Fartbarf, Neon Piss, and more!

Frobenius Twist — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:20:45 -0800

The A.V. Club have just released their annual list of noteworthy/insane/ridiculous band names.

By: Frobenius Twist

Frobenius Twist — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:21:34 -0800

(Also, for those who are interested in A.V. Club inside baseball, Keith Phipps is leaving the A.V. Club. Sadface.)

By: Frobenius Twist

Frobenius Twist — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:25:08 -0800

[Oh, and here is a direct link to page 2 of the article]

By: Thorzdad

Thorzdad — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:26:34 -0800

That Satan's Wrath logo is actually pretty good, though.

By: mazola

mazola — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:27:29 -0800

To be fair, all the good names have already been taken.

By: Phreesh

Phreesh — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:30:27 -0800

Highlights for me: Terri Schiavo Dance Party Edgar Allan Slow Coke Dick Motorcycle Awesome Uncle Bad Touch

By: darksasami

darksasami — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:30:59 -0800

If that photo of Eyeconoclast isn't a 4chan meme already, I don't understand the internet.

By: superquail

superquail — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:32:57 -0800

The lead singer of Eyeconoclast looks exactly like the Mighty Monarch.

By: beryllium

beryllium — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:33:12 -0800

Encoffination: for when bannination just doesn't go far enough?

By: gompa

gompa — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:33:56 -0800

They accidentally put one full-on fuckin-A awesome name in there. I speak, of course, of Caddywhompus.

By: Jpfed

Jpfed — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:34:50 -0800

The best part is filing "Skandalism" under "Yes, this kind of thing still happens".

By: drezdn

drezdn — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:36:44 -0800

I like to think that I have an awesome band name ready, if I can just get a band together.

By: infinitywaltz

infinitywaltz — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:38:10 -0800

I'm kind of relieved that none of my friends' bands made it onto the list this year. Well, relieved or disappointed. I don't know how to feel.

By: 2bucksplus

2bucksplus — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:47:09 -0800

Free band name: Deine Kabel

By: Inspector.Gadget

Inspector.Gadget — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:49:31 -0800

More than absurd names, I'm bothered by shit bands using interesting band/album names. For example: Coldworker's "The Contaminated Void". Should be an awesome crossover thrash album about zombies in space (a la Municipal Waste's "The Fatal Feast", but it's just...meh stuff about nothing (and I like grindcore). Buried Inside's "Chronoclast". Should be sludgy prog metal about time travel but it's boring metalcore about the tyranny of the 40-hour work week. Yawn.

By: evidenceofabsence

evidenceofabsence — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:50:07 -0800

Just in case you don't make it all the way through the "miscellany" section on the second page: Dumptruck Butterlips

By: It's Raining Florence Henderson

It's Raining Florence Henderson — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:52:58 -0800

Free band name: Deine Kabel There is nein kabel.

By: newmoistness

newmoistness — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:54:57 -0800

Es gibt kein Nabel.

By: Think_Long

Think_Long — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:55:54 -0800

Why is phipps leaving? Something to do with the recent Onion shakeups?

By: bendybendy

bendybendy — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:56:31 -0800

Why just this morning I saw a septuagenarian in a bright, asymmetrically patterned sweater and thought, "I bet there's a band called Cosby Sweater."

By: mccarty.tim

mccarty.tim — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:00:33 -0800

I tried saying Fartbarf aloud. I instantly felt ashamed and depressed. The fart sets you up for laughs, but then barf reminds you of every flu and food poisoning you ever had. Maybe I'm just particularly anti-vomiting, though.

By: perhapses

perhapses — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:04:29 -0800

The norovirus that many people have called stomach flu should be called Fartbarf Disease instead. Many places go with Winter Vomiting Disease but that only covers one end of the spectrum.

By: Navelgazer

Navelgazer — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:04:51 -0800

I'll give it up for "The Allah Las" and "A Good Rogering."

By: spock

spock — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:09:08 -0800

Free band name: SOLD OUT Besides having a double meaning, you will have a built-in excuse for why nobody ever shows up for your performances.

By: univac

univac — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:10:09 -0800

Free band name: Indentured Varmints

By: turgid dahlia 2

turgid dahlia 2 — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:17:12 -0800

The fart sets you up for laughs, but then barf reminds you of every flu and food poisoning you ever had. It's the human experience in a single, perfect little capsule.

By: blue_beetle

blue_beetle — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:19:10 -0800

I'm waiting for "FartBarf II: The Revenge"

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:22:16 -0800

How were there not already like a thousand bands called Satan's Wrath?

By: invitapriore

invitapriore — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:24:22 -0800

I misread "Smoochknob" as "Smoochmob" and I have to say I like the latter more.

By: me3dia

me3dia — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:25:17 -0800

"Potatoes Gonna Potate." Kinda love it.

By: invitapriore

invitapriore — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:27:12 -0800

Fartbarf actually sounds way funnier if you enunciate the "t" in "fart" rather than going for the usual glottalized "t."

By: Egg Shen

Egg Shen — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:27:26 -0800

If it farts, it's funny. If it barfs, it's not funny.

By: Tesseractive

Tesseractive — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:28:51 -0800

I have to say, I am really enjoying listening to The Jingle Punks Hipster Orchestra. If my life were a sitcom, I now believe their cover of "Lithium" would be the theme song.

By: invitapriore

invitapriore — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:28:53 -0800

Also, this was an inauspicious time to realize that I sometimes involuntarily vocalize words that I'm reading when I'm thinking about how they're pronounced.

By: Mister_A

Mister_A — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:29:02 -0800

You're thinking of Satan's Wrath (UK) maybe?

By: Flunkie

Flunkie — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:29:12 -0800

In all fairness, I really could go for a peanut butter lovesicle.

By: The Power Nap

The Power Nap — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:29:55 -0800

Free Band Names: Centipede Afterburner Midnight Brake-Job Chunk Overdrive Mr Anal and the Don't Touch That's You've been Satan'ed Tire Labradork Reciever Fist Missile Coffee Table Face Slam Urbanite Kryptonight One Drunk Bus Driver Rebel Dayworkers Heal with Steel and the Surgical Techs Phred Phelp's Phabulous Phive

By: Flunkie

Flunkie — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:30:49 -0800

... and it looks like that Eyeconoclast guy could use one, too.

By: Ghostride The Whip

Ghostride The Whip — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:31:16 -0800

Danny Glover and the Lethal Weapons is almost inspired.

By: fearfulsymmetry

fearfulsymmetry — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:33:48 -0800

Fuck that noise, Neon Piss is a great name for a band... and they rock too!

By: kirkaracha

kirkaracha — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:33:49 -0800

My perennial favorite: Shitty Shitty Band Band

By: item

item — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:41:47 -0800

By: item

item — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:43:29 -0800

Oh, and in Item's Book of All-time Worst Band Names, the major-label champion is still Hoobastank.

By: fearfulsymmetry

fearfulsymmetry — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:46:53 -0800

When I was at uni there was a punk band knocking about called The Fuck City Shitters... cue a ton of people complaining about there gig flyers / posters until (despite a very right-on article in the student paper re free speech) they ending up changing to FCS

By: item

item — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:49:49 -0800

It's been a while since I've looked at the AV Club. Are their articles always this poorly edited and designed these days?

By: lumpenprole

lumpenprole — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:51:09 -0800

Well, relieved or disappointed. I don't know how to feel. Every year, I'm sad our band didn't make it.

By: dr_dank

dr_dank — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:51:21 -0800

Tonight at Carnegie Hall: An Evening with Fartbarf

By: hap_hazard

hap_hazard — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 15:01:28 -0800

Yow- Moron Mountain Album Alcoholic Lesbian Velociraptor features songs like "Shit, Secret Jew Dick" (which opens with an Annie Hall sample) and "668 (Neighbor Of The Beast)" ALCOHOLIC LESBIAN VELOCIRAPTOR! There is no way I'm going to actually listen to that, it can't possibly be as good as it should. Also: Stankbot Tyranny The drummer of this band is 11 years old. Same deal, but I think I would pay to see them live.

By: threeants

threeants — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 15:16:02 -0800

Malicious Dismemberment Not to be confused with Ultimately Necessary But Really Quite Unfortunate Dismemberment.

By: Mars Saxman

Mars Saxman — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 15:25:58 -0800

I've seen a RUN DMT shirt somewhere before but thought it was just a stoner joke and didn't realize it was an actual band. I just looked them up on beatport hoping for massive psychedelic awesomeness, but they're more of a drum & bass group... I think my head might explode if I tried to listen to that while smoking DMT. Then again maybe that's the point.

By: The Card Cheat

The Card Cheat — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 15:36:51 -0800

Every single one of these names is better than Cherry Poppin' Daddies.

By: drezdn

drezdn — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 15:48:11 -0800

I would go see "You Can't Win, Charlie Brown" and buy their t-shirt.

By: Rustic Etruscan

Rustic Etruscan — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 15:49:57 -0800

Eyeconoclast: "I had fun once, and it was awful."

By: Rustic Etruscan

Rustic Etruscan — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 15:54:18 -0800

The Saddest Landscape: Wasn't there already a band called Boston?

By: anothermug

anothermug — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:02:32 -0800

My favourite band names are a couple from the '90s: Day-Glo Abortions; and: Me, Mom, and Morgentaler.

By: DarlingBri

DarlingBri — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:12:30 -0800

Oh whatever. At least half of all band names are crap until the band gains credibility. Alice in Chains? Morcheeba? Daft Punk? The Dead Milkmen? All really stupid names. Happily you can generate your own stupid band names!

By: vibrotronica

vibrotronica — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:14:21 -0800

Tonight on Great Performances: FartBarf, A Life Remembered.

By: Sys Rq

Sys Rq — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:15:54 -0800

"The Allah Las" Ali Mavers?

By: Tiresias

Tiresias — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:17:01 -0800

You guys, they weren't kidding: Rebuilding the Rights of Statues are really, really good.

By: No-sword

No-sword — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:17:16 -0800

You guys, maybe the lead singer of Eyeconoclast always looks like that because Batman threw him in a vat of Frownex, and all this teasing is going to push him over the edge into a sternness-themed crime spree.

By: smartyboots

smartyboots — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:17:17 -0800

Now TWO bands that I've been in have been included in this list! Hooray!

By: jonp72

jonp72 — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:28:58 -0800

I love how the frontman for Eyeconoclast is trying to give the camera the scary death metal face, but he just looks like Robyn Hitchcock constipated.

By: schmod

schmod — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:36:37 -0800

Not gonna lie.... I kind of want a t-shirt from Cilantro Boombox....

By: naoko

naoko — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:48:38 -0800

You guys, I don't think The Prep School Tragedy actually went to prep school.

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:51:53 -0800

my favorite from the 60s - the peanut butter conspiracy first and i believe only album - the peanut butter conspiracy is spreading listenable but kind of light and unmemorable jefferson airplane type pop, very well recorded

By: nadawi

nadawi — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:54:44 -0800

invitapriore - i don't know how you don't have a million favorites for that comment.

By: Hairy Lobster

Hairy Lobster — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 16:56:09 -0800

I think I discovered a great new dare for my various friends: watch/listen to A Nice Vibe's I Love You near the bottom of the list. In it's entirety! You must watch/listen to ALL OF IT! No drinking allowed until it's over!

By: Diablevert

Diablevert — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 17:19:34 -0800

Why is phipps leaving? Something to do with the recent Onion shakeups? Yeah, seriously, what the hell's up with that? I always thought of the AV Club as a place that was making it on the web.

By: soundofsuburbia

soundofsuburbia — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 17:30:20 -0800

I sometimes edit the concert guide in Sweden's best heavy metal magazine. I really should start writing down all the good bad names I come across doing that. The worst worst band name I've ever seen was Campsite, though. I'm all for things being band names - Magazine, Television, Refrigerator et al - but Campsite is just so uninspired and... lame. It's not funny, it's not gross, it's not ridiculous, it's... nothing. Nobody in the history of anything will utter the phrase "yeah, my favourite band is Campsite". Whatever were they thinking?

By: Skot

Skot — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 17:42:00 -0800

I always look forward to this list, mainly because I keep waiting for some bunch of deranged musicians to top my personal favorite from maybe 3-5 years ago. Because I am an awful person, it always makes me laugh to think about it: Sudden Infant Dance Syndrome.

By: EmpressCallipygos

EmpressCallipygos — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 18:30:19 -0800

I once was temporarily cornered at a youth hostel by a drunk Polish kid who was raving to me about his favorite band, which was named Burlap Cashmere. Just getting to learn that band name helped me forgive him for holding me up from getting back to my room when I was tired. I think my favorite one from this batch is "Thus: Owls".

By: jimmythefish

jimmythefish — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 18:40:03 -0800

I've always thought that Snow Patrol was a terrible name for a band.

By: EmpressCallipygos

EmpressCallipygos — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 18:49:30 -0800

Somewhat related - another blog has its own list of their top 30 album covers from this year.

By: Harvey Kilobit

Harvey Kilobit — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 19:24:23 -0800

Onion shakeups Least popular State Fair drink ever.

By: Mister Moofoo

Mister Moofoo — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 19:43:21 -0800

Traumatic Anal Devastation. Didn't they used to open up for the Butthole Surfers?

By: item

item — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 20:04:24 -0800

Now TWO bands that I've been in have been included in this list! Hooray! Do tell...

By: stavrosthewonderchicken

stavrosthewonderchicken — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 20:45:41 -0800

Hey now, come on. Wrinkle Neck Mules, Bear Suit Sucker Punch, and Hooray For Everything are pretty great band names.

By: Frobenius Twist

Frobenius Twist — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 20:50:11 -0800

And also relatedly, Pitchfork has their list of the worst album covers of the year.

By: cmonkey

cmonkey — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 21:25:43 -0800

I listened to a few The Jingle Punks Hipster Orchestra songs but it gave me the uncanny feeling that I was in a telephone hold queue. They're nuts if they aren't going after that market.

By: vibratory manner of working

vibratory manner of working — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 21:35:55 -0800

Some band names from music I have on my computer, although I have not actually listened to all of them: The World Is a Beautiful Place & I Am No Longer Afraid to Die The Birds Are Spies, They Report to the Trees BADBADNOTGOOD Suffocate for Fuck Sake Meanwhile, Back in Communist Russia... Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly Giraffes? Giraffes! I'll be adding some of the ones from this list later on. I already have a couple.

By: Mezentian

Mezentian — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 21:50:07 -0800

I seem to remember, back in my high school days, seeing a 7" by a racist skinhead ska group called Skastika. I really don't feel like going to the places on the internet where searching for that band might take me, however. I have no such qualms. You can all google if you want to find the T-shirt of the skanking swaztika (it's a swaztika with a little hat! Because hat will distract everyone from the distinctive red background and white circle motiff and not make you look like a Nazi). They are apparently "A 3rd wave ska band from Cleveland, Ohio. They are not racist (though the name may appear so)" according to Urban Dictionary. But that's as much as I could find. I am curious about this: Punk Funk Mob "Formed in 2007, this Bay Area band has been most accurately illustrated as the Ramones meets Funkadelic with Betty Davis on vocals." That makes me want to click on the link so hard, but if I do it it won't sound as good in my head.

By: Mezentian

Mezentian — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 21:56:18 -0800

And also relatedly, Pitchfork has their list of the worst album covers of the year. Big NSFW warning on that one for the large photo of the erect penis there. I scrolled down and it hit me in the eyes. But, yeah, those are awful. Including the David Byrne one. Nice to see Jessie Slaughter's fave band Blood On The Dancefloor are still kickin'. I guess that means he got away from the accusations she made, or she recanted.

By: Jpfed

Jpfed — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 22:17:51 -0800

(it's a swaztika with a little hat! Because hat will distract everyone from the distinctive red background and white circle motiff and not make you look like a Nazi). It's too bad they didn't try to score any irony points by having a checkerboard background.

By: MartinWisse

MartinWisse — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 23:28:25 -0800

My god, those first three covers on that list of worst album covers has the ieghtuies revival going to some dark, dark places.

By: Mezentian

Mezentian — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 23:53:21 -0800

My god, those first three covers on that list of worst album covers has the ieghtuies revival going to some dark, dark places. Frankie says: Relax. Choose life, man. And wake me up before you go go.

By: thesmallmachine

thesmallmachine — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 00:25:17 -0800

I have to stand up for Dark Dark Dark, both as a band and a bad name, particularly since they went ahead and called an album Bright Bright Bright.

By: fearfulsymmetry

fearfulsymmetry — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 01:58:51 -0800

How could I forget Hamfatter, the Dragon's Den band... but then again, the British record buying public soon did, bdum tish!

By: Decani

Decani — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 02:12:40 -0800

To my mind, none of those are as regrettable as the excruciating "Tame Impala", which strikes me as some sort of Platonic Form of the terrible band name. It seems like it was produced by a program designed to construct a two word band name that perfectly combines wimpiness, clichéd structure, staggering lack of cool and clunkingly clueless contrivance. I haven't actually heard any of that band's music but if it's anything like my description of the name then... well, I guess I'd have to forgive them.

By: From Bklyn

From Bklyn — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 05:12:12 -0800

"Mick's Jaguar" is a pretty hilarious.

By: Uther Bentrazor

Uther Bentrazor — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 07:24:18 -0800

I don't follow these lists too closely, has The Tony Danza Tapdance Extravaganza ever made the lists?

By: showbiz_liz

showbiz_liz — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 07:57:17 -0800

Every year I try to navigate all the "best music of 20**" lists, and every year it's basically "whatever songs happened to get inexplicably popular in 20**, regardless of merit." But this is different! I've totally been listening to Rebuilding the Rights of Statues and Jingle Punks Hipster Orchestra all morning!

By: orme

orme — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 09:07:05 -0800

Fartbarf? Why not Barfart? You get three meanings. They are going for meaning, right?

By: Chrysostom

Chrysostom — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 10:01:14 -0800

There was a band at my friend's college in the 90s: Kevin's Brother Jimmy. I always thought that was pretty good.

By: subdee

subdee — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 10:03:04 -0800

The A.V. Club is laughing at Sep7ember, but they have SEO figured out. Sarchasm is a clever name for a band. If nothing else, it teaches fans the correct pronunciation of "chasm". Rebuilding the Rights of Statues are good!

By: wilberforce

wilberforce — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 03:14:51 -0800

A tiny selection from the note on my phone: The Lumpy Heartbeats Funky Midnight Applicator The BLAM Ultimatum Downstairs Brownie Ding Fatigue Airquote Rampage Moho Disco (Mohorovičić Discontinuity) Classic Brownout Scenario Bassoon Inspection Marathon in Corduroy Vaginal Thunderdome Trackstand Breakthrough All-purpose Nuclear Bedtime Story The Mayan Caper Executive Timber Nothing is Lost Arcane Kinematics Shart Jorts Yay, Trebuchet! Moped Etymology Slapwrap Ball-gag Braincake The Wild Ninjas of Hampstead Heath Fully Automatic Monkey Fun Hat I wish someone would be in a band with me.

By: Mezentian

Mezentian — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 03:29:58 -0800

Vaginal Thunderdome Two men enter.... I wish someone would be in a band with me. Change Bassoon Inspection to "Barsoom Inspection" and I will be there with my French Horn.