How appropriate. You fight like a cow.

January 15, 2013 11:24 AM

The insult swordfighting from LucasArts' Monkey Island series is now available as a standalone browser game.

(If you get stuck, responses to some of the insults can be found here...but soon you'll be wearing my sword like a shish kebab.)

posted by Mr. Bad Example (12 comments total)

I am a dab hand at this, at least, with insults from the 1st game. I read somewhere that Orson Scott Card, the author of Ender's Game, helped Ron Gilbert come up with the insults. Absolute genius
posted by 0bvious at 11:39 AM on January 15

This explains a lot about both Scott Pilgrim and the Order of the Stick.
posted by NoraReed at 11:42 AM on January 15 [1 favorite]

First you'd better stop waving it around like a feather duster, man.
posted by egypturnash at 11:42 AM on January 15 [2 favorites]

For Halloween 2004 (I think), my wife, roommate, and myself went as Elaine, Guybrush, and LeCuck respectively. For people who recognized the characters, my wife made "I Beat the Swordmaster" T-Shirts, and by "make" I mean "wrote 'I Beat the Swordmaster' on white men's undershirts in magic marker." She spent a fair bit of time doing this, though, to make sure we had enough. Unfortunately, only three people recognized us, so we we had a ton of leftover shirts to that point that two years later my wife was still wearing them on a regular basis.

What I'm saying is, I'll play this game, but if I win please do not give me a shirt.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 11:43 AM on January 15 [12 favorites]

LONG overdue
posted by Bwithh at 11:47 AM on January 15 [1 favorite]

I'm imagining Card and Gilbert coming up with insults...

Card: "You are a vile homosexual and no part of civilized society."
Gilbert: "That's not really what we're..."
Card: "You are an impertinent homosexual and deserve to be a second-class citizen."
Gilbert: "No, look, it's..."
Card: "You fight like a dairy farmer."
Gilbert: "I like it."
posted by phong3d at 11:53 AM on January 15 [33 favorites]

Indeed, I forgot about Scott Card's turn to the vile side. Should've channelled it at pixelated pirates a bit more
posted by 0bvious at 12:28 PM on January 15

Sweet, it has the load screen monkeys from MI2.
posted by linux at 1:40 PM on January 15

More insult swordfighting here.

-Engarde! Touche! -Oh that is so cliche..
posted by ersatz at 2:02 PM on January 15

This game doesn't work as well if you remember them all from 20+ years ago.
posted by aubilenon at 4:41 PM on January 15 [2 favorites]

I hope that didn't sound like complaining. It was really just an oblique way of saying how much I adore everything about Monkey Island (except for the puzzle about getting the fish away from the seagull).
posted by aubilenon at 5:31 PM on January 15

Well there goes my evening.
posted by Cash4Lead at 6:04 PM on January 15