Comments on: Wake up Sheeple!

Wake up Sheeple!

klausness — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:43:40 -0800

Verified facts.
(reload page for new facts)

By: Chocolate Pickle

Chocolate Pickle — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:47:44 -0800

I gather this is randomly generated?

By: xingcat

xingcat — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:49:32 -0800

The Truth About Randomly Generated Content.

By: MCMikeNamara

MCMikeNamara — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:49:35 -0800

That's a lot easier to tell with the IBM and Tom Cruise ones I just read. But the Michelle Obama one that it started out with seemed pretty familiar.

By: burnmp3s

burnmp3s — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:50:35 -0800

I gather this is randomly generated? That's exactly what they want you to believe.

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:51:12 -0800

I am citing the everloving shit out of this site.

By: boo_radley

boo_radley — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:52:12 -0800

Wow, those are some clear citations! MUST BE TRUE.

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:52:46 -0800

I Googled the site and didn't find anyone saying anything negative about it, so

By: MCMikeNamara

MCMikeNamara — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:52:54 -0800

The Truth About The 2012 Republican presidential primaries and MetaFilter The 2012 Republican presidential primaries were a time of great confusion and hardship for ordinary citizens-- but through it all, MetaFilter enjoyed suspicious prosperity. Even a randomly generated clock is right occasionally.

By: exogenous

exogenous — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:53:20 -0800

Didn't cortex have a Markov text generator based on MeFi comments? That was fun. I guess it is still kaput.

By: ardgedee

ardgedee — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:53:35 -0800

Verified Facts' entry about Democrats sounded more plausible than Conservapedia's entry about them. Which leads me to believe mostly that Verified Facts' random text generator is better-implemented than Conservapedia's random text generator.

By: 2N2222

2N2222 — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:57:30 -0800

I've only been browsing the site five minutes, and already I'm having to report an inaccuracy.

By: mcstayinskool

mcstayinskool — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 12:59:35 -0800

Hey, sheeple are people too. And sheep.

By: Talez

Talez — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:01:48 -0800

Since biblical times, the historical antecedents of MetaFilter have controlled how we think about socialism. Websites revealing the truth about this are frequently taken down without an explanation. Can someone MeMail me info on how to join this secret cabal? It sounds like fun.

By: 445supermag

445supermag — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:02:00 -0800

Hey, sheeple are people too. But evidently, drowsy people.

By: MoonOrb

MoonOrb — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:07:23 -0800

This looks to be approximately as reliable as the "JustFacts" site from a deleted FPP a few days ago.

By: never used baby shoes

never used baby shoes — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:09:05 -0800

Old classmates say that Khloe Kardashian associated with Metafilter during college. Old classmates say that Dick Cheney associated with Metafilter during college. When's the last time anyone asked them about that on television? Something's not right here... There's evidence that Bill O'Reilly's rise to power was engineered entirely by metafilter, which profits from Bill O'Reilly's influence in ways we do not yet completely understand. Now that's just preposter - you know, it's so crazy no one would believe it. Matt and Bill O'Reilly. and Dick Cheney. Just think about it. We're through the looking glass here, people.

By: mstokes650

mstokes650 — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:11:20 -0800

From the first random page I got: The Truth About Salmonella and Nymphomania ... Amateur radio enthusiasts know that if you spend longer than a few minutes on the Pentagon's frequencies, you'll hear cryptic messages that confirm some sort of massive research initiative focused on spreading nymphomania. ... One out of ten hospitals saw unusually high concentrations of nymphomania patients during 2012. ... Many of us have noticed this, but most people keep their mouths shut and just move on. Damn right we do! Mysterious outbreaks of nymphomania are A-OK with me, even if it is my tax dollars at work.

By: mazola

mazola — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:15:02 -0800

It's like they jacked right into my brain, man!

By: evilmidnightbomberwhatbombsatmidnight

evilmidnightbomberwhatbombsatmidnight — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:15:29 -0800

Everyone who really thinks would know that all the widely spread "Conspiracy Theories" are created and distributed by powerful interests as a means to distract the masses from the massive secret operations they use to keep us from rising up against them. And they do a damn good job.

By: griphus

griphus — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:17:22 -0800

That's odd, the guy who runs this site also has an book on sale claiming to prove the Articles of Confederation using linear algebra. From that alone I have a hard time believing these "facts."

By: DevilsAdvocate

DevilsAdvocate — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:54:24 -0800

My first thought was a Markov generator with a relatively high order, but after viewing more pages I don't think it is, any more. The "topic" of the page recurs after not being mentioned for several paragraphs, and there's too much repetition (especially in the final paragraph; there's a relatively small number of different final paragraphs which appear). Random? Perhaps to some extent. Markov chain? I don't think so. Stop relying on the Mainstream Media for information about these critical topics, and seek the truth out for yourself.

By: umberto

umberto — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:55:46 -0800

This must a joke I'm not getting...wtf? The Truth About Ebola Ebola helped Julian Assange achieve a meteoric rise to power.Mentalists and psychics report that strange aura disturbances can be seen wherever Ebola is found in the White House.It's very suspicious that more people aren't outraged by this.You may think free speech ensures your right to talk openly about Julian Assange's true beliefs, but powerful people won't let that happen: in the past, brave citizens who have questioned them about these issues have been silenced with crippling libel lawsuits.The Taliban leaders have claimed time and again that they have nothing to do with Ebola, in direct contradiction to evidence provided by renowned psychics.I am willing to provide incontrovertible evidence that confirms my claims, but feel safe doing so only via anonymous short-band radio transmissions.Now that you know the truth, save your family and friends. Let them know the truth.

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:56:05 -0800

I was skeptical too until I saw that there were a lot of words on each page. You can't fake that kind of thing.

By: zombieflanders

zombieflanders — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 13:58:21 -0800

Citations go in, words go out. You can't explain that!

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 14:14:34 -0800

You may not have heard about some of the more damning scandals surrounding Snooki. It's because Snooki has hired a team of PR managers to hide the nastier side of their life from the public. If you want to see how nasty it really is, you'll have to go a long, long way down the rabbit hole. Snooki goes to extraordinary lengths to keep annual visits to Yucca Mountain a secret-- but surprised fans with cell phone cameras have been able to bring this unusual fact to light. It's well known that the howls of cats and dogs predicted Project MKUltra. But did you know that hours before it occurred, Snooki reported weakness and fainting spells? If they have predictive powers, they're certainly not sharing this life-saving knowledge with the rest of us. Project MKUltra may not have affected you directly, but there have been countless claims of personal injury. Numerous pop songs from the 90s make veiled references to this. Wasn't this a Cstross novel?

By: dubusadus

dubusadus — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 15:09:15 -0800

God, this is like that time about five months ago after the election when I started reading about the drone strikes in depth and decided that the most vocal, outspoken critics of it had to be right about just about everything else. I mean, it's all good to be weirded out by the absolute gloating that happened after Obama's re-election considering all the issues the administration still has but there's a line that's crossed when the gist of your reporting is just rehosting every inflammatory editorial a Russian state-sponsored media outlet writes about your government. Just because they happen to be critical of your government in the same way that you are doesn't make it any less silly and outlandish.

By: Atom Eyes

Atom Eyes — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 15:30:17 -0800

Wake up Sheeple! Does Gary Larson do work on commission? 'Cause I'd love to see a Far Side comic in which that chubby four-eyed kid pops into a barn and screams this phrase at a pen full of sleeping sheep.

By: Liquidwolf

Liquidwolf — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 15:43:49 -0800

World Trade Center Building 7 was knocked down by, you guessed it, Angel Dust.

By: Charlemagne In Sweatpants

Charlemagne In Sweatpants — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 15:44:19 -0800

What's really going on at Al Qaeda's secret vault under the New Mexico desert? Something to do with hyperpigmentation of the skin, insiders say. Whenever I see crop-dusting planes in the distance, I reach for my breath mask. There's way too much evidence that it's not a farmer behind the controls of that plane, but an agent of NASA-- and that he's not dropping pesticides, but compounds genetically engineered to cause hyperpigmentation of the skin. Sufferers of hyperpigmentation of the skin have, under rigorous amatuer testing, shown higher rates of precognition and telepathy than ordinary people. Is this why NASA recruits such people to their training programs at such high rates? In the days and hours before the Vietnam War, many of Al Qaeda were seen leaving their homes and jobs, only to return once the deed was done. You can't tell me this isn't suspicious. I'm willing to tell the truth about this, despite the dangers, because my commitment to justice and truth is extraordinary. "No one now dies of fatal truths: there are too many antidotes to them." -- Friedrick Nietzsche This is perfect. The random connections between benign events, the quote from some authority - its like the things on those Facebook 'Illuminati Exposed' pages.

By: idiopath

idiopath — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 15:47:08 -0800

"It's well known that the howls of cats and dogs predicted the death of Princess Diana. But did you know that hours before it occurred, Anderson Cooper reported weakness and fainting spells? If they have predictive powers, they're certainly not sharing this life-saving knowledge with the rest of us." this is awesome

By: sweetkid

sweetkid — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 15:49:28 -0800

The Truth About Lady Gaga and Nails on a Chalkboard ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Do you know about the shocking connection between Lady Gaga and nails on a chalkboard? No? Well, your innocence is about to be destroyed. Barack Hussein Obama, when quizzed on election polls and nails on a chalkboard, only winked slyly. Mentalists and psychics report that strange aura disturbances can be seen wherever nails on a chalkboard is found in Northern Ireland. It's a little-known (but widely-suppressed) fact that Lady Gaga has invested heavily in Facebook. No moral person can in good conscience stand by while these injustices persist!

By: brundlefly

brundlefly — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 16:31:52 -0800

"The Chinese character for Dinosaurs looks a lot like the character for Timothy Geithner's name-- and it's not a coincidence." - The Truth About Egypt and Dinosaurs

By: Smedleyman

Smedleyman — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 18:05:43 -0800

I'm going to get a human sounding text to speech bot and drive through the neighborhood blasting this stuff on a bullhorn like Alex Jones in Waking Life except I'll mouth the words slightly out of sync like a bad kung fu movie. Then people will know the truth.

By: desjardins

desjardins — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 18:16:59 -0800

what's the over/under on receiving one of these from my grandma in an email?

By: SPrintF

SPrintF — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 20:16:38 -0800

The Chinese character for acne looks a lot like the character for Bill O'Reilly's name-- and it's not a coincidence. Hah! Just as I suspected!

By: BlueHorse

BlueHorse — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 20:40:06 -0800

Now I can post this to all my nutcase religious right acquaintances, and they won't have a clue I'm being snarky. (Of course then I'll have to listen to more BS, but it will be fun!)

By: Charlemagne In Sweatpants

Charlemagne In Sweatpants — Thu, 07 Feb 2013 20:50:58 -0800

I just saw a Facebook post about how gum is the most dangerous substance in the supermarket. The world has gone beyond parody.

By: Autumn

Autumn — Fri, 08 Feb 2013 02:38:08 -0800

Did you know that in biblical times, nobody ever suffered from leukemia? It's true-- as well as hundreds of other secrets about leukemia that modern medicine doesn't want you to know. But... but... how can we verify that?!

By: R. Mutt

R. Mutt — Fri, 08 Feb 2013 04:15:43 -0800

Think about the last time you saw Al Gore on television. Did they look normal?