Not safe for those under the influence of hallucinogenic substances
March 14, 2013 11:55 AM   Subscribe

 
That was pretty dark.
posted by Windopaene at 12:03 PM on March 14, 2013


The sciences, each straining in its own direction, have hitherto harmed us little; but some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the deadly light into the peace and safety of a new dark age
posted by Blasdelb at 12:11 PM on March 14, 2013 [10 favorites]


Really goes someplace around the 1:20 mark
posted by SharkParty at 12:12 PM on March 14, 2013


Now I want a Lovecraftian cultist cooking show.
posted by The Whelk at 12:13 PM on March 14, 2013 [5 favorites]


Oprah is a pretty easy target.
posted by KokuRyu at 12:16 PM on March 14, 2013


That's what all cooking shows look like to me.
posted by Slack-a-gogo at 12:17 PM on March 14, 2013 [5 favorites]


It's a good thing ( manical laughter)
posted by The Whelk at 12:18 PM on March 14, 2013


The George Washington talking dollar spoof is pure genius, though.
posted by KokuRyu at 12:20 PM on March 14, 2013


we call it 'Crafting"
posted by The Whelk at 12:24 PM on March 14, 2013


The women and girls in these videos all sound like Scott Thompson imitating Divine. That's not a criticism, just an observation.
posted by JimInLoganSquare at 12:24 PM on March 14, 2013


"The George Washington talking dollar spoof is pure genius, though."

As the youtube comments note, they are all Ben Franklin quotes - genius!
posted by Blasdelb at 12:28 PM on March 14, 2013 [1 favorite]


A Hamburger Today, Serious Eats: Paula Deen is Trying To Kill Us:

Part 1: Deep Fried Butter Balls
Part 2: Bacon-Wrapped Fried Mac & Cheese
Part 3: Fudge made from Velveeta, Butter and Cocoa Powder
Part 4: Bacon, Doughnut, Egg Burger
Part 5: Big Mike Burger

More at the first link.
posted by zarq at 12:35 PM on March 14, 2013


I take back my Oprah comment after realizing this is about "Paula Deen" (in all fairness, I had never heard of her before). The donut hamburger thingy in the 'ludes spoof is bizarre enough on its own.
posted by KokuRyu at 12:43 PM on March 14, 2013


Now I want a Lovecraftian cultist cooking show.

Come over to my house and bring a camera.
posted by New England Cultist at 12:54 PM on March 14, 2013 [3 favorites]


Now I want a Lovecraftian cultist cooking show.

Paula Dean is a Whately on her mother's side, I think I read somewhere. All that butter ain't natural.

You could call the show "Do Not Fry Up What You Cannot Choke Down."
posted by GenjiandProust at 1:04 PM on March 14, 2013


Really goes someplace around the 1:20 mark

I read that as "Reality goes someplace around the 1:20 mark."

Strangely, I was not disappointed.
posted by fifthrider at 1:21 PM on March 14, 2013 [4 favorites]


After watching (in most cases, rewatching) all of those, I can confirm there is really is nothing one can do to make Tyra Banks more terrifying than she already is.
posted by louche mustachio at 1:34 PM on March 14, 2013


"And where Nyarlathotep went, rest vanished; for the small hours were rent with the screams of a nightmare" or at least spreading his word via facebook.
posted by jeffburdges at 4:08 PM on March 14, 2013


Now I want a Lovecraftian cultist cooking show.

"Things That Should Not Be ... Eaten"

Or

"With Strange Ingredients Even Death May Die"

Or

"The Flavour Out Of Space"
posted by Mister Moofoo at 5:23 PM on March 14, 2013 [2 favorites]


I recommend Youtube Doubling this like so.
posted by tybeet at 6:14 PM on March 14, 2013


I am just not sure that slowing things down and adding sound effects can really add to the horror of seeing someone wonton wrap and deep fry a slice of store-bought frozen cheesecake
posted by Pre-Taped Call In Show at 6:46 PM on March 14, 2013 [1 favorite]


Hellraiser puzzle box at 0:49.

You can put all the wrapping paper on it you like. I can still tell.
posted by obiwanwasabi at 1:38 AM on March 15, 2013 [2 favorites]


fuck yes WolfGore. i want him to direct the commercial for my new cereal for blonde women called "It's All Good."
posted by Conrad-Casserole at 4:50 PM on March 15, 2013


The first 120 seconds of the baby bullet one are absolutely terrifying.
posted by EXISTENZ IS PAUSED at 6:34 PM on March 15, 2013 [1 favorite]


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