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NOT NO BUT HELL NO
May 31, 2013 11:53 AM   Subscribe

"The Texas SkyScreamer is now the park’s tallest attraction at 400 feet and will hold a world record title as the tallest tower swing ride in the world. Up to twenty-four riders sit in open-air swings while spinning in a 124-foot circle at speeds up to 35 mph. At its 40 story peak, guests have the ultimate view of the Arlington, Dallas and Fort Worth." Watch it in action.
posted by jbickers (103 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite

 
Fuckyeah!
posted by Capt. Renault at 11:54 AM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


In. Meetup?
posted by eugenen at 11:57 AM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


Half of me wants to go RIGHT NOW and half of me says HOSHIT NO WAY!
posted by immlass at 11:57 AM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


I can just see one of the chains breaking and getting someone killed or injured. And then it comes out that a regulation was bypassed or an official was paid to look the other way. That looks super dangerous and poorly constructed.
posted by ishrinkmajeans at 11:57 AM on May 31, 2013


Man, those chains look really flimsy. Like handbag chain weight.
posted by elizardbits at 11:58 AM on May 31, 2013 [6 favorites]


With a name like "SkyScreamer," I thought it'd be one of those lift-and-drop rides, but this one looks like a wonderful flight. Scary because of the height, yes, but also kind of relaxing.
posted by xingcat at 11:58 AM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


Fortunately Texas is well-known for its strong safety regulations, so you can ride with confidence!
posted by brain_drain at 11:58 AM on May 31, 2013 [31 favorites]


There's also a bunch of POV videos that riders have shot, if that's your thing.
posted by jbickers at 11:59 AM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


Pepsi Woooooo!
posted by 2bucksplus at 11:59 AM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


I can just see one of the chains breaking and getting someone killed or injured. And then it comes out that a regulation was bypassed or an official was paid to look the other way. That looks super dangerous and poorly constructed.

I very seriously doubt this. Of course accidents can happen but the possible cost of corner-cutting far, far outweighs the benefits for a company like Six Flags.
posted by eugenen at 12:00 PM on May 31, 2013 [4 favorites]


Also I wonder how long it's going to take them to turn a profit on a ride that only seats 24 people at once.
posted by elizardbits at 12:01 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


It has happened before, but there is nothing to compare it to now.
posted by theodolite at 12:02 PM on May 31, 2013


It's still no match for The Devastator!
posted by stargell at 12:03 PM on May 31, 2013 [12 favorites]


I guess? If an accident does happen six flags will just settle for less than the cost of obeying the regulations and come out ahead. They have people whos' job it is to figure out how much human suffering costs just like every other company.
posted by ishrinkmajeans at 12:03 PM on May 31, 2013


No thanks. Nope. Nein. Nyet. Never. No.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 12:03 PM on May 31, 2013 [3 favorites]


The Texas Skyohthisisratherpleasanter.
posted by 0 answers at 12:03 PM on May 31, 2013 [4 favorites]


Don't be alarmed, ladies and gentlemen. Those chains are made of chrome steel.
posted by Thorzdad at 12:04 PM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


an official was paid to look the other way

Oh come on. You're talking about a theme park ride in the USA. Fear of lawsuits, a culture of keeping everyone cuddly and safe, and the fact that they probably charge $20 to ride this thing so there's no reason to cheap out on construction, mean you're more likely to get hurt sitting on a park bench.

Now I have Aqualung playing in my head
posted by Pruitt-Igoe at 12:05 PM on May 31, 2013 [9 favorites]


I was in a much shorter one of these several years ago, and something about my seat was poorly ballasted or something. It started to rock forwards and backwards, and my center of gravity was so far above the restraint bar that I was convinced I was going to fall out and die. Nobody else's seat was doing this. I have rarely been so utterly terrified in my life.

I'd forgotten about this -- or repressed it, more likely -- until I saw this video. You could not pay me enough; you could offer my children health insurance for the rest of their lives and I would not get in that chair.
posted by KathrynT at 12:05 PM on May 31, 2013 [6 favorites]


Why is Rush Limbaugh announcing?
posted by symbioid at 12:06 PM on May 31, 2013


The credible impession that the ride may kill you is a feature, not a bug. That's why state fair midway rides are so damn fun! (I am talkin' about you, The Zipper.)
posted by fikri at 12:06 PM on May 31, 2013 [9 favorites]


At its 40 story peak, guests have the ultimate view of the Arlington, Dallas and Fort Worth.

Based on the promo and POV videos, the ultimate view seems to consist of the rest of the amusement park, freeways, haze, and the back of some dude's CM Punk t-shirt. This is not inconsistent with my brief experiences in the Dallas/Arlington area.
posted by Homeboy Trouble at 12:06 PM on May 31, 2013 [36 favorites]


When I first saw the tower I was thinking that it was one of those things where you just drop straight down. In comparison to that suicide mission, this seems almost tame.
posted by feloniousmonk at 12:06 PM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


Based on the promo and POV videos, the ultimate view seems to consist of the rest of the amusement park, freeways, haze, and the back of some dude's CM Punk t-shirt.

I laughed when the guy said something like "you can even see the top of Cowboy Stadium!", aka Jerryworld which is practically next door to Six Flags.

In comparison to that suicide mission, this seems almost tame.

Yeah, it still gets a hell no from me but I was expecting it to be worse. It doesn't even look like the swing goes full horizontal like some swing rides I've seen.
posted by kmz at 12:09 PM on May 31, 2013


I guess? If an accident does happen six flags will just settle for less than the cost of obeying the regulations and come out ahead.

Don't want to derail so I'll leave off after this, but risking a mega-million-dollar lawsuit (or settlement), a huge reputational hit, and having to decommission the ride in order to save some money on construction is crazy and Six Flags wouldn't do it.
posted by eugenen at 12:09 PM on May 31, 2013 [6 favorites]


More like the Texas PantsShitter, amirite?
posted by tristeza at 12:11 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


FYI: tornadoes are free in Texas.
posted by srboisvert at 12:13 PM on May 31, 2013 [3 favorites]


http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incidents_at_Six_Flags_parks

Six flags does not have to worry about their sterling safety record. They don't have one. Several people have died on these "gondola" rides.
posted by ishrinkmajeans at 12:13 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


Good damn thing I have no intention of ever going to Arlington Texas so that ride cannot reach out and grab me. Phew.
posted by mygothlaundry at 12:14 PM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


Good title for the thread, very accurate.
posted by bleep at 12:14 PM on May 31, 2013


I'm not sure why so many people see this as massively unsafe or perhaps the result of corrupt enforcement of safety guidelines. These rides have been around for many, many years and are fixtures are fairgrounds all around the world. They're basically safe. There are accidents, sure, but there are lots of them and they're not atypical in their risk profile. A welded chain, even a flimsy one, can easily support a fat human.

So the new Six Flags one is higher up? So what? If you manage to get out of your seat from 60 feet do you really think you're a whole lot safer than you would be at 400 feet? You're soft and squidgy. Falling from way lower than 400 feet is likely to kill you.
posted by samworm at 12:16 PM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


On June 17, 1987, a 19-year-old girl died after falling from the Lightnin' Loops shuttle loop roller coaster. The park was found to be in violation of the Carnival/Amusement Ride Safety Act and was subsequently charged with the maximum state fines of $1,000.
posted by fullerine at 12:17 PM on May 31, 2013 [5 favorites]


The wikipedia link on Six Flags incidents is actually more comforting than alarming. Considering the millions of guests who are go to the parks each year, the number and seriousness of prior incidents is actually quite low.
posted by brain_drain at 12:17 PM on May 31, 2013 [9 favorites]


That looks awesome! I would ride the crap outta that.
posted by Mister_A at 12:17 PM on May 31, 2013


Holy crap. I would totally do that.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 12:20 PM on May 31, 2013


maximum state fines of $1,000.

Just to be clear, that state was New Jersey, not Texas.
posted by kmz at 12:21 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


When I first saw the tower I was thinking that it was one of those things where you just drop straight down.

I was thinking one of those swing/catapult things, this seems kinda lame, unless you have acrophobia, or chain-break-o-phobia.
posted by sammyo at 12:22 PM on May 31, 2013


That looks super dangerous and poorly constructed.

Really? What part? The redundant chains? The extremely dense crossbracing?

Six flags does not have to worry about their sterling safety record. They don't have one.

Again, really? Estimates vary, and I was not able (or interested enough, frankly) to find an official source, but 25 million people a year visit Six Flags various parks. In the article you linked (or didn't link) there are a large handful of tragic heart incidents, a few tragic "person hopped the fence" incidents and, yes, a few tragic ride malfunction incidents. Over the life of the parks. You apparently have some axe to grind with Six Flags but it is not based on an objective reality.
posted by dirtdirt at 12:23 PM on May 31, 2013 [20 favorites]


"You can see the top of Cowboy stadium". Texas-state shaped branding iron for the ribbon cutting. Bubbastep soundtrack. You've gotta love Texas kitsch.
posted by Nelson at 12:24 PM on May 31, 2013 [3 favorites]


Right, and certainly there was a suit or settlement, it was a tragedy, no doubt, and how many people have died at Great Adventure since? Not to dismiss or excuse this event, but the fact is that amusement park operators - especially the large ones like Disney, Busch Gardens, Six Flags – they take this stuff extremely seriously.
posted by Mister_A at 12:24 PM on May 31, 2013


In. Meetup?

If you're serious, yes. Later this summer would be a blast - an admittedly hot as hellfuck blast, but a blast nonetheless. SFOT isn't SFOT if you witness less than 5 individuals receiving medical attention for moronic behavior in dangerously high temperatures.
posted by item at 12:24 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


the dubstep sez to me that the wheel would keep going up up up off the axle and fly into the sky rotating above us puny humans to the lizard overlord ship
posted by lalochezia at 12:29 PM on May 31, 2013 [4 favorites]


Yea, when the local Fair/Carnival comes around I can and do ride the most intense rides they have. Zipper, Gravitron, Crazy flippy thing that spins you and shakes the teeth out of your head, Loopy circle thing supported by guy wires that were probably driven in by someone with an alcohol problem, you get the idea.

But the swing thing that does this exact thing about 20/40 feet in the air. Never again. Never never never. Something about the feeling of exposure made the butt clenching reflexes and the OMFG this is the end feeling way, way more pronounced than with the other rides.

Seconding the title, hell no.
posted by RolandOfEld at 12:30 PM on May 31, 2013


If you're serious, yes. Later this summer would be a blast - an admittedly hot as hellfuck blast, but a blast nonetheless. SFOT isn't SFOT if you witness less than 5 individuals receiving medical attention for moronic behavior in dangerously high temperatures.

Tell me when. Six Flags Over Texas would be an awesome weekend trip.
posted by eugenen at 12:32 PM on May 31, 2013


1. I can think of many things I would rather have an ultimate view of than Arlington, Dallas, and Fort Worth.

2. The attendants would surely deprive me of my glasses, which means I would have the ultimate view of fuck-all.
posted by louche mustachio at 12:32 PM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


Also I wonder how long it's going to take them to turn a profit on a ride that only seats 24 people at once.

I was struck by how few riders it takes in one trip, too. The similar rides built lower to the ground typically carry far more riders, so perhaps there's something about the height that adds a significant higher load/stress on the mechanisms?
posted by Thorzdad at 12:32 PM on May 31, 2013


perhaps there's something about the height that adds a significant higher load/stress on the mechanisms?

Think of a structure like this as a lever, with the fulcrum at the ground. Or an unsupported cantilever deck but in a vertical orientation.

Anyway, the height means any force applied at the top subjects the taller structure to a larger moment of force than a shorter structure would be subjected to.

This is of course oversimplifying and ignoring many variables like internal forces, bending, and the simple weight restrictions for a non-dynamic structure this tall, but you get the idea.
posted by RolandOfEld at 12:37 PM on May 31, 2013


at first i was like "i can't believe there's awful dubstep in the video for this" and then seconds later i was like "of course, how did i not immediately realize there would be awful dubstep in the video for this"
posted by a birds at 12:37 PM on May 31, 2013 [6 favorites]


With a name like "SkyScreamer," I thought it'd be one of those lift-and-drop rides

Yeah, me too--probably because it's what Marineland calls theirs.
posted by Sys Rq at 12:46 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


>More like the Texas PantsShitter, amirite?

Looks at video
Calculates rotational velocity
Taps in weight and air resistance of average turd

Hel-LO Texas!
posted by Devonian at 12:47 PM on May 31, 2013


I don't get the people in this thread saying this thing looks tame. I'd much rather be dropped into a free-fall from that height than to slooooowly rotate while sitting, legs dangling, in a cheap plastic seat attached only by a few meager chains.

Plus, it's just really fucking high.
posted by Atom Eyes at 12:49 PM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


Heck, if they play dubstep at you while you're riding it, my mind would immediately fix on "Are they giving us a subtle hint that we should ... wait for the drop? OHGODNO!"
posted by benito.strauss at 12:50 PM on May 31, 2013 [7 favorites]


I wonder what the diameter will be of the permanent ring of vomit.
posted by Sys Rq at 12:57 PM on May 31, 2013 [3 favorites]


I am terrified of heights (do not fuck around on a second story banister at a young age. It can scar you).

But this looks kinda fun, assuming nothing breaks.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 1:19 PM on May 31, 2013


I would absolutely ride this one and I hope they build another one in Great Adventure (sorry, Six Flags Great Adventure). I rode the Insanity ride at the Stratosphere in Vegas, so evidently I'm fearless about the strangest things.
posted by kimberussell at 1:20 PM on May 31, 2013


In other news, cell phone shops in the greater Arlington area start selling a hell of a lot of replacement handheld devices.
posted by vverse23 at 1:20 PM on May 31, 2013 [4 favorites]


At its 40 story peak, guests have the ultimate view of the hairdos in Arlington, and sometimes Dallas and Fort Worth peaking through for a moment.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 1:21 PM on May 31, 2013 [3 favorites]


I wonder how far my spew would reach if I barf while spinning at the top.
posted by Runes at 1:23 PM on May 31, 2013


Whole lotta Fallacy of Misleading Vividness up in this thread.

I bet most of the NO NO NO people in this thread drive a car, or ride in cars driven by others.

Seems to me the biggest safety issue would be items dropped by people on the ride.
posted by Sokka shot first at 1:27 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


Oh, I'm sure it's perfectly safe. I'm also sure I would never, ever, ever go on it in a million years because I am terrified just watching the VIDEO of someone riding it.
posted by chrominance at 1:29 PM on May 31, 2013 [4 favorites]


I have no local knowledge, so that may be the ultimate view of Arlington etc, but its stilll not much of a view is it?
posted by biffa at 1:35 PM on May 31, 2013


I want to see an electrical power failure test.

I'm picturing those chairs bashing into the tower if the arms suddenly stop spinning.
posted by surplus at 1:35 PM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


I enjoy coasters a lot. While in Copenhagen last summer, my wife and I tried the Star Flyer at Tivoli Gardens. Holy Crap. The thing is 260ft, and this height combined with the isolation you get on a swing is incredibly intense. It was hard to enjoy the view... My wife kept telling me to keep talking so she wouldn't freak out.
posted by bruceo at 1:41 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


I want to see an electrical power failure test.

I'm picturing those chairs bashing into the tower if the arms suddenly stop spinning.


If I had to guess, when power isn't applied to the spinny part, it will continue to freewheel like a bicycle tire on a geared bike. But then you'd slowly slow down until you were just hanging there, 40 stories high.
posted by dobi at 1:48 PM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


CTRL-F Palm Sweat: 0 hits.

Color me blown away.
posted by Mooski at 1:54 PM on May 31, 2013


That looks fun.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 1:58 PM on May 31, 2013


Whole lotta Fallacy of Misleading Vividness up in this thread.
I bet most of the NO NO NO people in this thread drive a car, or ride in cars driven by others.


I don't think you understand how human fear works.
posted by Atom Eyes at 2:01 PM on May 31, 2013 [4 favorites]


You mean it's not a weakness caused by cars?
posted by fleacircus at 2:04 PM on May 31, 2013


When I saw the video of this a couple days ago, I fell down the Six Flags rabbit hole. We lived about half an hour away, so I grew up with the place.

One of the joys of the first trip to Six Flags of the year was getting that year's souvenir poster, which would hang above my bed for the rest of the year.

Other things I found when doing the nostalgia thing:

Vintage Six Flags postcards
More photos/postcards
TV commercial from 1961
Video from the Spelunkers' Cave and the Spindletop [Before the Roaring Rapids ride was installed, there were only three places in the park to go to cool off in the summer: The Spelunkers' Cave, the log flume ride, and the Chevy Show. Oh, and consumption of a Pink Thing was also required.]
Don't forget PacMan land
This commercial was soooo 6th grade for me

Sadly, the Screamer replaced the iconic Texas Chute-Out It will be missed.
posted by mudpuppie at 2:22 PM on May 31, 2013 [3 favorites]


Video from the Spelunkers' Cave and the Spindletop

Holy crap, my childhood! (The cave ride was the best—that is, until Six Flags acquired the rights to Looney Tunes and replaced all the creepy pointy-faced gnome creatures with Bugs, Daffy, et al. as an excuse to sell more crappy merch.)
posted by Atom Eyes at 2:43 PM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


I'm picturing those chairs bashing into the tower if the arms suddenly stop spinning.

That has already happened (though the chairs bash into each other, not the tower) on their other, smaller, older swingy-go-round dealy. Hopefully they've incorporated whatever lessons they learned from that incident into this new ride.
posted by Sys Rq at 2:46 PM on May 31, 2013


Nnnnnnope. But I really dig the Logan's Run/Carousel thing it's got going on.

I bet it would be really fun for people who didn't have vertigo or fear of, well, any of the reasons there are to fear this thing, and
posted by Room 641-A at 2:47 PM on May 31, 2013


Holy crap, my childhood!

(I know, right? I was well into adulthood before I realized that this song was from a famous film, and not a proprietary melody channeled over Six Flags' loudspeakers.)

posted by mudpuppie at 2:48 PM on May 31, 2013


I'm getting the biggest rush of nostalgia looking at the pics and video of the Spelunkers Cave. I swear I can smell the inside of that thing right now.
posted by Kloryne at 2:53 PM on May 31, 2013


I was anxious for the video to end. Texas Skyscreamer and I will never be friends.
posted by but no cigar at 2:55 PM on May 31, 2013


Man there are a lot of people in this thread who didn't grow up with Astroworld as their special-treat-playground, both because "Skyscreamer" already means something to them and because they know that the Texas Cyclone will never be defeated as the king of "ohshitthereLsnowaythisisn'tgoingtofallapartbeneathus" thrills.
posted by Navelgazer at 2:55 PM on May 31, 2013


And the thing about safety is, this isn't a super-complicated ride. It's a rotating chain swing. It goes up, rotates, comes down. As far as safety isn't it basically down to "don't let the chains and seats wear out?

I grew up in Arlington. Six Flags accidents were vanishingly rare. And they depend on families with their precious children being willing to cough up 60 bucks a pop or whatever to go...there's not an incentive there to put in the E-Z Break Cheepo Chains.

The biggest downside is that a panoramic view of Arlington is about the most boring panoramic view you can imagine. Flat-topped chain stores stretching out in all directions. And roads choked with traffic because they refuse to put in transit.

If your heart's desire is to see lots of chain restaurant roofs from above, you're all set.
posted by emjaybee at 3:06 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


> I wonder what the diameter will be of the permanent ring of vomit.

You would make a great calculus teacher.
posted by benito.strauss at 3:10 PM on May 31, 2013


You couldn't get me on that thing even at gunpoint.
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 3:13 PM on May 31, 2013


Also I wonder how long it's going to take them to turn a profit on a ride that only seats 24 people at once.

You don't understand their business model. You don't buy a ticket per ride. You buy a ticket to enter the park.

A ride like this will attract people to the park. It's a headliner. On a busy day some people will come to the park because of this ride but won't be willing to wait in line to ride it. That's fine by Six Flags -- they still get the entrance fee.
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 3:17 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


No. Fucking. Way.

Awesome bit of construction, I love rollercoasters and am fascinated by how people design this stuff.
posted by marienbad at 3:22 PM on May 31, 2013


BRING IT. I DOSED AN HOUR AGO.
posted by Lipstick Thespian at 3:56 PM on May 31, 2013 [6 favorites]


Hey, so if you happen to be interested in a Six Flags Over Texas meetup one weekend at the end of July (because, let's face it, the hotter the better) to ride this fucker then I suggest doing two things - or one of two things:

1. memail my Texas-dwelling ass
and/or
2. keep an eye on IRL in the coming weeks.
posted by item at 4:11 PM on May 31, 2013


I know - or as far as I know - Guy Fieri doesn't own this sucker, but nonetheless I believe we can out-fun those ironic NYC Mefites, meaning that we can have a meetup with some actual fun versus a meetup where we pay $14 for weak sugary drinks and $21 for rubbery chicken parts.
posted by item at 4:14 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


But can you out-vomit them?
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:16 PM on May 31, 2013 [2 favorites]


Some contests will always be tied.
posted by item at 4:18 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


emjaybee: "there's not an incentive there to put in the E-Z Break Cheepo Chains."

Obviously not. That's just terrible branding.

"If your heart's desire is to see lots of chain restaurant roofs from above, you're all set."

Finally!
posted by krinklyfig at 4:29 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


Eat a Pink Thing for me, item. (And I mean the literally and innocently.)
posted by mudpuppie at 4:53 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


I think this looks super fun, and I want them to put one in at Six Flags New England so I can see my house from it maybe. Because I'm definitely not going to Arlington, Texas any time soon.
posted by dayintoday at 6:10 PM on May 31, 2013


And if they do build one here, I'll watch you from down below, pretty sure that the chain will break and you'll fly off and land somewhere in Holyoke, because there's no way on Shiva H. Vishnu's green earth that I'm going up on that thing.
posted by otters walk among us at 6:21 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


Man there are a lot of people in this thread who didn't grow up with Astroworld as their special-treat-playground, both because "Skyscreamer" already means something to them and because they know that the Texas Cyclone will never be defeated as the king of "ohshitthereLsnowaythisisn'tgoingtofallapartbeneathus" thrills.

I didn't even notice the name, but otherwise yes.
posted by immlass at 6:23 PM on May 31, 2013


These tall swing rides are nothing new - bruceo mentioned the 260-foot one at Tivoli in Copenhagen. Cedar Point, Knott's Berry Farm, Carowinds and Kings Dominion and several other parks have the 300-foot Windseeker ones. But these use fixed arms with bucket seats, not chains and the little seats, so I'm sure you feel more secure. I'm a little surprised at Six Flags going with the bar-and-midback seat system - I wouldn't worry about the chains breaking, but at someone slipping under the restraint bar.

Personally, my favorite thing about swing rides is the tilt of the disc, causing you to swooop up and down, so these new ultra-tall up-and-down ones do nothing for me.
posted by clerestory at 7:45 PM on May 31, 2013 [1 favorite]


I see your hell no, and raise you a there is absolutely no fucking way.
posted by Ber at 9:12 PM on May 31, 2013


I'm a little surprised at Six Flags going with the bar-and-midback seat system - I wouldn't worry about the chains breaking, but at someone slipping under the restraint bar.

It looks as if there's also a lap seatbelt, but yeah, the idea of falling out/off is way more unsettling to me than the height or even the chains (which look like they could pinch your fingers, ouchie). This is why your silly old county fair Ferris wheel is the scariest fucking ride of all: nothing but that ridiculous bar and one good sneeze between you and the morgue.

I'd feel way safer on something like the Cedar Point Gatekeeper since you're totally strapped into the thing. And it has that lovely "thread the needle effect" similar to the "my legs are going to be snapped clean off when we bash into the ground" sensation you get on a disc-tilt swing ride.
posted by FelliniBlank at 9:19 PM on May 31, 2013


A couple of years ago my husband went on the Prater Tower, then then-worlds-tallest-chair swing at 383 feet. He said it was swoopy and fun, mildly exhilarating but relatively sedate and not at all scary (tiny chair and creaky chains and all). I guess they might swing this one faster or tilt it around more but I don't really see how it will be a lot more scary even with the small amount of extra height. Plus I bet the view across Vienna was better.

I didn't go on it because just watching fairground rides makes my stomach heave, so there's that too.
posted by shelleycat at 1:19 AM on June 1, 2013


The ultimate view being, of course, by Texas standards...
"Man... that's a whole lotta nothing."
posted by markkraft at 2:18 AM on June 1, 2013


Looks like maybe 32 riders at a time, maybe 4 minutes between circuits, so...450 or so riders per hour?

That's about 1/4 (at best) the capacity of a top-tier roller coaster.

Enjoy the long waits / sparse crowds, I guess?
posted by ShutterBun at 2:59 AM on June 1, 2013


I'm terrified on the little, presumably survivable, swing rides. That thing? No, sir, I do not approve.

Although the 'watch it in action' video is annoying because it is a literal description of what the video is - you watch the thing from the perspective of a onlooker, and all the video from the rider's perspective is so crappy and edited together so jumpily that you can't actually see what riding it is like.
posted by winna at 9:28 AM on June 1, 2013


I watched the video and I just started saying "Fuck you." to no one in particular. Over and over again as the video progressed, increasing in speed until I was just saying "fuckyoufuckyoufuckyou". And then I took my coffee cup under my desk and sat there for a while eating trail mix.

I came back up to post that I will not make it to this Mefi meetup, also fuck you.
posted by Uther Bentrazor at 11:18 AM on June 1, 2013


I've never had any desire to visit Texas (I don't do well with hot weather) until now.
posted by zorrine at 1:48 PM on June 1, 2013


I so want to ride this! Wonder if there will be one built at Six Flags Great America.
posted by SisterHavana at 5:13 PM on June 1, 2013


Cedar Point has something similar but not quite as high called WindSeeker. It lights up at night and is absolutely beautiful. It's a weird combination of frightening and incredibly relaxing. It gets really quiet up there, actually. The sounds of the park just kind of fade out as you climb up and the views are incredible.
posted by mike_bling at 2:53 PM on June 3, 2013


samworm: "I'm not sure why so many people see this as massively unsafe or perhaps the result of corrupt enforcement of safety guidelines."

There is a sizable contingent of MeFites who hate Texas, so when something is posted about Texas, the question is not "Is it good or bad?", but "What kind of bad is it?". It's a post about a ride, so sexism, racism, etc., don't apply, so the obvious answer is "It must be unsafe". Because Texas.
posted by Bugbread at 8:42 PM on June 3, 2013


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