Four Astronauts and a Kitten

December 7, 2001 7:22 AM

Four Astronauts and a Kitten is the best book about four astronauts (a mother-daughter team and twin teens) and a cat you're likely to read this year. The actual title is much longer, but if you read the book, you'll understand all. And they say vanity press is a bad idea . . .
posted by vraxoin (14 comments total)

The House Of The Seven Cats Promised Land Adventures looks pretty good.
posted by Mocata at 7:51 AM on December 7, 2001

It may be the best book about four astronaughts and a cat, but from what I've read so far it's a pretty shitty book in general.
posted by delmoi at 8:01 AM on December 7, 2001

I...I can't...I mean, they...oh jeez. I want to say there's something touching about how technology has empowered people to find their voice and express themselves creatively, but: "He aimed a scowl at his boss in a voice dark as lava."

*cries*

I do think "Intergalactic Friendship Club" should be the new MeFi tagline.
posted by arco at 8:13 AM on December 7, 2001

Interesting, I didn't know the Bulwer Lytton Contest accepted full length novels.
posted by malphigian at 8:22 AM on December 7, 2001

"voice dark as lava"

Dear god.
posted by Outlawyr at 8:23 AM on December 7, 2001

There's more of them...

"Novelist, Anne Hart is the author of 51 books, both fiction and nonfiction and numerous plays and scripts. She holds a graduate degree in English/Creative Writing and teaches fiction writing part-time online for a university."

She also holds "lifetime community college teaching credentials".

Can you imagine the kind of comments English 101 students are getting back from her?
"Yes, the Mongol hordes are a facinating bunch. But don't you think adding a part Ragdoll, part Siamese kitten would help show the Khan's softer side?"
posted by nickonomicon at 8:40 AM on December 7, 2001

Dear god.

God had nothing to do with this atrocity.
posted by lotsofno at 8:42 AM on December 7, 2001

I bet jesus did. hehe. "Barked" the orders into the phone.
posted by tiaka at 10:29 AM on December 7, 2001

Two figures walked slowly--Bill and Don the teenage sons of Ellen and Suzie Rhodes.

Suzie's their sister and their parent. Now that is Intergalactic!
posted by girlbowler at 10:40 AM on December 7, 2001

If you read only one book about four astronauts and a cat this year, make sure it is Four Astronauts and a Kitten!
posted by kindall at 10:44 AM on December 7, 2001

Don's widened eyes reflected the lights above like bowls of soggy cereal.

This story makes me need beer.
posted by swell at 8:58 PM on December 7, 2001

It's no style style!
posted by Neale at 10:16 PM on December 7, 2001

The further you read, the murkier it gets (from a gender point of view). The "daughter" switches sex quite indiscriminately, and the "mother" is often referred to as "he" as well.

There's also Marina the weight-lifting maid.

Out in space, there's plenty of land for everybody.

What if Mom doesn't have enough water to cool the electronic systems?

Ms Hare is obviously a woman for whom elementary physics is a mere technicality.

How does it feel to be both the teenage sons and brothers of mother and daughter astronauts?"

(similarly basic biology)

I kind of need to find out whether Ms Hare really really means that the twins are somehow the offspring of the Mother and Daughter Team. Yet I want to get this information without actually reading the book.

I feel dirty already, though.
posted by Grangousier at 5:02 AM on December 8, 2001

Oops. It's Ann Hart, not Hare. My mistake. Sorry.

She's also the author of A Private Eye Called Mama Africa: What's an Egyptian Jewish Female Psycho-Sleuth Doing Fighting Hate Crimes in California?

In case you were wondering.

I suspect she's doing all this without pharmaceutical assistance, which makes it all the more impressive.
posted by Grangousier at 5:22 AM on December 8, 2001