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A talkative porcupine eats a banana
July 25, 2013 10:26 AM   Subscribe

Feeling down? Watching a talkative porcupine eat a banana might cheer you up! (SLYT)

There are also some porcupine facts, starting about 2:12.
posted by elmer benson (69 comments total) 49 users marked this as a favorite

 
I enjoyed that. Bonus: It made my cat stand up on her hind legs for about 10 seconds.
posted by mudpuppie at 10:29 AM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


OH MY GOD HE USES HIS HANDS LIKE A PEOPLE
posted by elizardbits at 10:31 AM on July 25, 2013 [41 favorites]


One-tooth porkypine!
posted by jessamyn at 10:33 AM on July 25, 2013


I came in here to gush about his stupid little hands in capital letters but I see I've been beaten to it.

I MEAN JUST LOOK AT HIM. AAAAAAHHH.
posted by phunniemee at 10:33 AM on July 25, 2013 [6 favorites]


"Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!"
posted by brand-gnu at 10:33 AM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


I... if I had a porcupine that made those noises he would be the fattest porcupine EVER because I would just be like AWWW SQUEAKBUTT HERE HAVE SOME BANANAS FOREVER
posted by WidgetAlley at 10:34 AM on July 25, 2013 [34 favorites]


You have no idea how much I needed that today.
posted by Cat Pie Hurts at 10:35 AM on July 25, 2013 [4 favorites]


See also "Teddy Bear".
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 10:36 AM on July 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


I wonder what that porcupine's quills smell like.
posted by Ad hominem at 10:36 AM on July 25, 2013 [5 favorites]


between this and the news that dolphins have names for each other, i figure it's just a matter of time before a confederation of species has us tied up, going DAH DAH DAH for bananas
posted by angrycat at 10:37 AM on July 25, 2013 [3 favorites]



I wonder what that porcupine's quills smell like.


TITLE OF 2ND MOST PAINFUL VIDEO EVAR

replace smell with fuck and you have a winner
posted by lalochezia at 10:40 AM on July 25, 2013 [4 favorites]


"Huh. Guess that lady is holding a toddler while she's feeding the porcupine; wonder when I'll start to hear the O MY GOD THAT ISN'T AN UNSEEN TODDLER IT'S THE PORCUPINE!!! O MY GOD!! ALL THE CUTES!!111!1!!!"

Also, Widget Alley, I can't decide if I'm delighted or horrified that you would call your porcupine Squeakbutt but YES GIVE IT MORE BANANAS FOR THE CUTE
posted by allthinky at 10:42 AM on July 25, 2013 [3 favorites]


Hi I'm Yoshi!
posted by 2bucksplus at 10:44 AM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


So cute!!!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 10:44 AM on July 25, 2013


good
posted by seanmpuckett at 10:45 AM on July 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


It's now clear that porcupines have quills because no other animal would take them seriously otherwise.
posted by zombieflanders at 10:46 AM on July 25, 2013 [20 favorites]


I could a tale unfold whose lightest word
Would harrow up thy soul, freeze thy young blood,
Make thy two eyes, like stars, start from their spheres,
Thy knotty and combined locks to part
And each particular hair to stand on end,
Like quills upon the squeakful porpentine.
posted by mittens at 10:46 AM on July 25, 2013 [4 favorites]


So porcupines used to steal babies and replace them in their cribs right? If not, why would they sound like that?

(Granted, I was pretty much making the same noises watching it, so who knows?)
posted by MCMikeNamara at 10:47 AM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


"Eh eh eh. Eh Eh? Eh EH EH EH! Eh eh e-e-e. E-e-e."

What this then? Banana? BANANA! Yep that was pretty good. Pretty gosh-darn good.
posted by 2bucksplus at 10:50 AM on July 25, 2013


I love the noises he makes, kind of reminds me of Cousin It from the Addams Family.
posted by doctor_negative at 10:51 AM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Why, yes. Yes it did cheer me up. Thank you! Now I will go forth and cheer other people up with it!
posted by nosila at 10:51 AM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Watching a talkative porcupine eat a banana might cheer you up!

... well, I'll be darned. It did.
posted by Elsa at 10:54 AM on July 25, 2013 [4 favorites]


At 1:52-ish I believe he actually says Nom Nom
posted by Greg Nog at 10:56 AM on July 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


I am curious, however, why they make him pull up a basket and then hand him a banana? Like, why not put the banana in the basket that you're making him pull up? There is a lot I do not understand about porcupines, though less now than when I woke up!
posted by jessamyn at 10:56 AM on July 25, 2013 [8 favorites]


Damn right it did! I feel so mu... aaaand NC General Assembly just voted to exterminate all the porcupines.
posted by reverend cuttle at 10:57 AM on July 25, 2013 [6 favorites]


I WANT ONE!
posted by DigDoug at 10:58 AM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


I felt such unexpected kinship with him --- not because of his love for bananas or even his terrible dental history, but because when she pokes him in his tender belly, he makes exactly the same gesture and sound that I do when The Fella pokes me there.
posted by Elsa at 10:59 AM on July 25, 2013


Like, why not put the banana in the basket that you're making him pull up? There is a lot I do not understand about porcupines, though less now than when I woke up!

Lack of thumbs mean he'd mostly just dump banana slices on the floor... over and over and over again.
posted by DigDoug at 11:01 AM on July 25, 2013


Awwwwwwwwwwwww!

My previous favorite porcupine video also features bananas but this one has hiccups
posted by casarkos at 11:03 AM on July 25, 2013 [3 favorites]


^That's clearly a baby in a fur suit.
posted by 2bucksplus at 11:04 AM on July 25, 2013


They should really get it some thumbs then.
posted by Ad hominem at 11:04 AM on July 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


Dammit, the lip smacking and chirping really set off my misophonia. My coworkers were watching this with me until I suddenly said, "ENOUGH I CAN'T STAND THE SOUNDS" and now they're all back at their desks where they're peering at me with concerned/bewildered looks on their faces.
posted by These Birds of a Feather at 11:09 AM on July 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


Oh jeeze, baby porcupine with hiccups???? I can't. I can't. I will never be productive again.
posted by These Birds of a Feather at 11:11 AM on July 25, 2013


OK, so they've got him pulling the basket up by the rope pretty well. Next bit: teaching him the dialog: 'It puts the lotion on its skin...'
posted by fikri at 11:11 AM on July 25, 2013 [9 favorites]


*quits job*
*buys rope, basket, bananas*
*moves to Montana*
posted by flyingsquirrel at 11:12 AM on July 25, 2013 [5 favorites]


Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

Eh?

Ah! AHHH!

...

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
posted by middleclasstool at 11:13 AM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


AH AH EH MM NOM AAHH

I cannot wait to get home to show this video to the cats. And man, do I want a porcupine now.
posted by rtha at 11:14 AM on July 25, 2013



Well at least I now know I'm wasn't crazy when I kept thinking I was hearing a baby in my backyard.
posted by Jalliah at 11:15 AM on July 25, 2013


Quoth the raven, "Traitors!"
posted by spaltavian at 11:16 AM on July 25, 2013 [4 favorites]


You know those Funny or Die videos where they get slightly overweight comedians to act out Internet videos? Well, I want to see Patton Oswalt's rendition of this.
posted by codacorolla at 11:20 AM on July 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


At 1:52-ish I believe he actually says Nom Nom

Yeah, that's right before he says "Rob Reiner. Clown. Pareto."
posted by darksasami at 11:20 AM on July 25, 2013 [3 favorites]


Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

Eh?

Ah! AHHH!

...

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!


LISTEN!
posted by Navelgazer at 11:23 AM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


TNG fans are used to this mode of dialog.
posted by sparklemotion at 11:26 AM on July 25, 2013


I did, in fact, need this.
posted by jenlovesponies at 11:27 AM on July 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


rtha: "I cannot wait to get home to show this video to the cats."

I had that thought as well. On one hand, I'm interested to see what they'd do to the sound. On the other, they would be so jealous of the hands that I don't want to break their hearts.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 11:29 AM on July 25, 2013


Absolutely frightening. Paging Guillermo Del Toro anyone??
posted by Mr.Me at 11:40 AM on July 25, 2013


On the one hand, this is totally adorable. On the other hand, that crow video where someone pointed out that porcupine quills can work their way into a heart.
posted by jeather at 11:43 AM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


Well, this porcupine video has certainly worked its way into Metafilter's heart! eh? eh?
posted by hattifattener at 11:45 AM on July 25, 2013 [8 favorites]


It was the darkest part of the night, and I was camping alone in a very remote rustic cabin. Suddenly it sounded as though the building itself was being CRUNCHED, possibly in the mouth of God. I was terrified and began shouting and screaming...

And then THE VOICE began. That creepy, almost-human-but-not-quite voice. I heard it through the door... what was it saying? I could hardly breathe... After what felt like hours I heard the stones shifting on the walkway as whatever it was walked away.

I did not sleep again that night, and thought I had forgotten all about that terrifying incident. Until I clicked on this link. And OMIGOD IT'S THAT VOICE AGAIN!
posted by kinnakeet at 11:50 AM on July 25, 2013 [5 favorites]


That's not the video kinnakeet. THAT'S IN YOUR HOUSE.
posted by Ghostride The Whip at 11:58 AM on July 25, 2013 [7 favorites]


I'm hella sick but having to work anyway, and this video is undoubtedly responsible for my powering through and getting the rest of my stuff done.
posted by altopower at 12:03 PM on July 25, 2013


I had a porcupine when I was a kid, friendly as could be, needless to say, very few people asked to hold it.
posted by HuronBob at 12:07 PM on July 25, 2013


Probably because of its prickly demeanor.
posted by zombieflanders at 12:12 PM on July 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


And sharp retorts.
posted by kinnakeet at 12:18 PM on July 25, 2013 [2 favorites]


Whoa. PORCUPINES CAN TALK?!
posted by misha at 12:24 PM on July 25, 2013


Hey, just yesterday I learned walruses can whistle, and now this.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 12:27 PM on July 25, 2013


what! i had no idea porcupines were cute

damn why are there so many cute animals
posted by a birds at 12:33 PM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


my favorite part is the belly poke!
posted by krix at 12:49 PM on July 25, 2013


Cute, but not cuddly.
posted by Kevin Street at 1:12 PM on July 25, 2013


doctor_negative: "I love the noises he makes, kind of reminds me of Cousin It from the Addams Family."

Reminded me more of a jawa.
posted by jiawen at 1:20 PM on July 25, 2013


Nonono. That is not a happy porkpyne!


Gimmie the banananana!
Now!
Banananana now!
Not the belly!
No. NO! Not the belly!
The basket's empty.
!@#$%^
Bananaaaa.
Now!
!#$%\
Put it in the basket fer Pete's sake.
I'll bite your damn finger!
Leave my whiskers alone!
NOT the belly!
Banananana.
BANANANA ALREADY!!!

But cute. A very cute grumbling porkpyne.
posted by BlueHorse at 2:01 PM on July 25, 2013 [4 favorites]


is they any more banana?
posted by seanmpuckett at 2:08 PM on July 25, 2013


I know a song that contains the line "And the porcupine talks to himself."

It took YouTube to let me know this this is actually true. And highly entertaining, even to my dog.
posted by Archer25 at 2:09 PM on July 25, 2013


Banana.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 2:40 PM on July 25, 2013 [3 favorites]


Oh my, this is so cute. I had no idea porcupines could make noises! If these videos didn't come from animal sanctuaries/zoos, I would swear someone was dubbing in voices.

In TheWhiteSkull's Teddy Bear video, I swear I swear the porcupine says either "Back off!" or "My cob!" [0:47] when the zookeeper tries to take his corn cob away from him.
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 3:02 PM on July 25, 2013


Metafilter: I cannot wait to get home to show this video to the cats.
posted by Munching Langolier at 6:18 PM on July 25, 2013 [4 favorites]


But, this isn't what North Americans call a porcupine, it's more like half-hedgehog, half-porcupine, half-lemur. What is it?
posted by Flashman at 6:37 PM on July 25, 2013 [1 favorite]


It's a Brazilian porcupine.
posted by Dynex at 10:05 PM on July 26, 2013


"He is a one-toothed porcupine on top, and so he really enjoys his soft foods like banana."

That is so adorable and sad (re: tooth) and did I mention adorable?
posted by RainyJay at 7:59 AM on July 27, 2013


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