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We have #coats
September 19, 2013 3:59 PM   Subscribe

On June 6, 2013 @BurlCoatFactory started posting on Twitter, apparently on behalf of the Burlington Coat Factory retail chain. The tweets started out reasonably enough, if a bit whimsical. But after a month had gone by things started to get a bit zanier and eventually full on weird. New York Magazine reports that until a few days ago the Burlington Coat Factory website linked directly to the account, but the link has now been removed and the corporation has allegedly disavowed any connection to the account (though said disavowal has apparently also been removed). Jezebel, Mashable, and even Esquire cover the weirdness.
posted by Songdog (104 comments total) 48 users marked this as a favorite

 
Did you have a weekend? If so, good!
posted by JHarris at 4:01 PM on September 19, 2013 [6 favorites]


Is it more than great coats?
posted by The Whelk at 4:01 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


For planning of the weekend what are they? Shopping?? Yes #coats

This is amazing.
posted by jeudi at 4:02 PM on September 19, 2013 [17 favorites]


The cat said stop in today and purrrrrchase a #coat

Yes yes yes.
posted by figurant at 4:04 PM on September 19, 2013 [4 favorites]


I adore this. I'd like to think it was an intern that went rogue after the social media account got handed off to them.

Can you believe fall fashion is!
posted by Countess Elena at 4:05 PM on September 19, 2013 [2 favorites]


One from today: "Do not get burned by hottest fashion trend.Do not please be cautious"
posted by dirigibleman at 4:06 PM on September 19, 2013 [6 favorites]


Tomorrow is the DAY OF SATUR.
posted by JHarris at 4:06 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


horse_ecoats
posted by Wolfdog at 4:06 PM on September 19, 2013 [25 favorites]


This is glorious times for absolute best of everyone. #coats
posted by naju at 4:10 PM on September 19, 2013


I agree with myself #tcoats
posted by Potomac Avenue at 4:12 PM on September 19, 2013 [5 favorites]


Sadly, I bet twitter shuts this down. #coats
posted by cjorgensen at 4:12 PM on September 19, 2013


Why not buttons? Why not indeed #coats
posted by The Whelk at 4:18 PM on September 19, 2013


God, I love Twitter.
posted by Elementary Penguin at 4:19 PM on September 19, 2013 [4 favorites]


Discount coat's, for men's, women's and kids! Plus home furnishings. Its Burlington Coat Factory!

Seems legit.
posted by 2bucksplus at 4:20 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


Burlington Coat Factory: more than great coats, so much more, massively more, unfathomly more.
posted by The Whelk at 4:24 PM on September 19, 2013 [4 favorites]


Clever intern outsourced tweeting China. #4-hour_work_week, #Engrish, #coats, #blahblah
posted by theora55 at 4:26 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


We have such coats to show you.
posted by 2bucksplus at 4:26 PM on September 19, 2013 [6 favorites]


I've been waiting for Monday so I could quote "Have a Monday." #blankface

Ah this is so Shiba Confessions.
posted by inevitability at 4:28 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


Good morning tweeps
posted by cybrcamper at 4:32 PM on September 19, 2013


So coat
Wow fashion
Budgets have one
Coaturday
Such warmth.
posted by The Whelk at 4:33 PM on September 19, 2013 [12 favorites]


Burlington Coat Factory: more than great coats, no greatcoats. #coats
posted by cosmic.osmo at 4:33 PM on September 19, 2013


I hope the Atlantic will blog about this.

Ta-Nehisi #Coates
posted by moonmilk at 4:34 PM on September 19, 2013 [19 favorites]


I hope word of this reaches France.

#Coat d'Azur
posted by Rustic Etruscan at 4:38 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


All of the one liners I make were actually for Men's Wearhouse. This is making me sadder than it should though I'm sure the correct response should be relief at not making the mistake.

(I guarantee.)
posted by MCMikeNamara at 4:39 PM on September 19, 2013


I like to drink a wine when shopping coats du rhone
posted by The Whelk at 4:39 PM on September 19, 2013 [2 favorites]


Thanks for signing up for Coat Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about COATS! /|:|\
posted by moonmilk at 4:40 PM on September 19, 2013 [13 favorites]


Outfit your vestibule at our sister store Hall and Coats.
posted by zippy at 4:41 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


Plumed serpent
so beautiful wise
and good
Now half off
#coatl
posted by octobersurprise at 4:42 PM on September 19, 2013 [9 favorites]


COAT FACTS: Coats are very anicent and come form the phrase COVERINGS ON ANOTHER'S TRUNK, org. used to keep maple trees warm in winter
posted by The Whelk at 4:44 PM on September 19, 2013 [3 favorites]


for subversive, challenging humor of the kind used to sell coats, horses
posted by This, of course, alludes to you at 4:45 PM on September 19, 2013


The one with #coats is the only one you need.
posted by eyeballkid at 4:47 PM on September 19, 2013


Do horses need coats the answer is always yes
posted by The Whelk at 4:47 PM on September 19, 2013 [2 favorites]


Mares need coats and does need coats and little lambs need leggings
posted by moonmilk at 4:49 PM on September 19, 2013 [23 favorites]


Burlington HorseEbooks Factory?
posted by thewalrus at 4:50 PM on September 19, 2013


This is the most I've ever thought about Burlington Coat Factory. Indeed, the place is fully alive in my imagination now, mythical even. Maybe this really is the future of marketing?
posted by naju at 4:51 PM on September 19, 2013 [13 favorites]


Good morning tweeps...
posted by Cookiebastard at 4:53 PM on September 19, 2013


I want to start a company that only communicates like this Twitter feed and the Corporate Spirit tumblr but I need one of the costumes from Lotus' viral marketing thingy and ALSO maybe something to sell i hear #coats are sell #YesIDoLikeCoatsBigTime
posted by jason_steakums at 4:55 PM on September 19, 2013 [4 favorites]


I thought their recent " I get it" TV campaign was hilarious.
posted by sweetkid at 4:57 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


The best twitter marketing campaign I've seen is #NIGHTOFTHEFREEIPAD

[previously, whelked]
posted by moonmilk at 4:57 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


That's not a coat. THIS is a #coat!

A worldly raccoon in a jacket: a #coat-i-mundi
posted by BlueHorse at 5:01 PM on September 19, 2013


This is the most I've ever thought about Burlington Coat Factory.

When I say I am from the Burlington, Vermont area, people routinely ask me if we have the original Burlington Coat Factory.

We do not.
posted by maryr at 5:05 PM on September 19, 2013 [6 favorites]


Even the related posts are BTV-centric!
posted by maryr at 5:05 PM on September 19, 2013


I have a can-do attitude! I can coat shopping?
posted by Dr. Zira at 5:09 PM on September 19, 2013


Sadly, I bet twitter shuts this down. #coats

Why? horse_ebooks is still up
posted by emptythought at 5:11 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


This is my coat. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

My coat is human, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother. I will learn its weaknesses, its strength, its parts, its accessories, its buttons and its zipper. I will keep my coat clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready. We will become part of each other. We will...

Before God, I swear this creed. My coat and I are the defenders of my country. We are the masters of our enemy. We are the saviors of my life.

So be it, until victory is America's and there is no enemy, but peace.
posted by Atom Eyes at 5:13 PM on September 19, 2013 [2 favorites]


Honestly, a lot of them read/sound like the job of posting new tweets was offshored/outsourced to an English-as-a-third-language shop. They certainly read like a lot of spam I've seen.
posted by Thorzdad at 5:16 PM on September 19, 2013


Markov tweet generator gone rogue.
posted by ceribus peribus at 5:17 PM on September 19, 2013


jason_steakums, that tumblr is awe-inspiring.
posted by JHarris at 5:26 PM on September 19, 2013 [2 favorites]


I just flew in from the coats, and boy are my rams tired. #goats
posted by moonmilk at 5:29 PM on September 19, 2013 [2 favorites]


Don't take / a curve / at 60 per. / We hate to lose / a customer / #Burma_coats
posted by vozworth at 5:33 PM on September 19, 2013 [3 favorites]


Have you thought about coats today because we have.
posted by St. Peepsburg at 5:34 PM on September 19, 2013


"#coats" is officially my favorite way to end a sentence now.

...#coats
posted by malapropist at 5:35 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


Coats
Soothes
Relieves
posted by briank at 6:05 PM on September 19, 2013 [3 favorites]


I'm the C.O.A.T. / The Coatest Of All Time
posted by jason_steakums at 6:11 PM on September 19, 2013 [3 favorites]


"Repent, Burlington!" Said The @BurlCoatMan.
posted by infinitewindow at 6:13 PM on September 19, 2013 [2 favorites]


On that note, Look at the Burlingtons! By V. Nabokoat
posted by Rustic Etruscan at 6:17 PM on September 19, 2013


I may go out tomorrow if I can borrow a coat to wear #coats
posted by moonmilk at 6:25 PM on September 19, 2013


I will go out tonight
now that I have got a #coat to wear
posted by Rustic Etruscan at 6:27 PM on September 19, 2013


I love the 2010's because EVERYTHING IS WEIRD.
posted by kiltedtaco at 6:30 PM on September 19, 2013 [10 favorites]


I live less than an hour from Burlington, and based on regional classified ads, Craigslist postings, billboards/business signage, etc. I could well believe that these tweets were the work of a statistically average North Carolinian adult with no humorous agenda.
posted by Rustmouth Snakedrill at 6:35 PM on September 19, 2013 [2 favorites]


totes #coats
posted by jason_steakums at 6:38 PM on September 19, 2013 [3 favorites]


More than great weasels #stoats
posted by Biblio at 6:55 PM on September 19, 2013 [4 favorites]


Here I am at triple bogey, but I keep taking #strokes

Ears, eyes, nose and #throats

A shout-out to all our unborn readers. #zygotes

Sorry about your Witches and Militias. #moats
posted by JHarris at 7:01 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


Joseph and the amazing technicolor dream #coat.

(Whenever I think of #coats, I think of a college friend one of who's favorite expressions was "I need that like I need credit from the Burlington #Coat Factory.")
posted by octobersurprise at 7:10 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


You guys, I just tweeted this link and look what happens if you're not logged in.
posted by clavicle at 7:13 PM on September 19, 2013 [3 favorites]


EVERYONE WANTS THAT WEIRD TWITTER DOLLAR
posted by Sticherbeast at 7:24 PM on September 19, 2013 [3 favorites]


i am become #coats destroyer of tweeps
posted by jason_steakums at 7:31 PM on September 19, 2013 [2 favorites]


Pretty sure Allie Brosh has an opinion about this.
posted by pxe2000 at 7:43 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


Oh God. This is what they tweeted on 9/11. This is so good.
posted by Sticherbeast at 7:45 PM on September 19, 2013 [6 favorites]


@stitcherbeast

i don't
posted by This, of course, alludes to you at 7:56 PM on September 19, 2013


Elvis needs #coats
Elvis needs #coats
Elvis Elvis Elvis Elvis Elvis Elvis Elvis needs #coats
posted by MrBadExample at 7:58 PM on September 19, 2013 [3 favorites]


Like a good milk, this really #coats the tongue.
posted by feloniousmonk at 7:59 PM on September 19, 2013


Coats? GREAT!
posted by stltony at 8:05 PM on September 19, 2013


Steve Miller is going to freak when he sees this. #coats
posted by JohnnyGunn at 8:11 PM on September 19, 2013


I'm just excited that my city now has a TEDx conference coming up, so perhaps the #bikegolem can rise again and we can really bring in the weird twitter dollar. So manys dollar.
posted by limeonaire at 8:24 PM on September 19, 2013


Werid twitter doesn't have a dollar, it has tiny angry birds demanding things.
posted by The Whelk at 8:25 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


tiny dollars demanding birds
posted by limeonaire at 8:28 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


I live less than an hour from Burlington, and based on regional classified ads, Craigslist postings, billboards/business signage, etc. I could well believe that these tweets were the work of a statistically average North Carolinian adult with no humorous agenda.
posted by Rustmouth Snakedrill at 9:35 PM on September 19

Wrong Burlington! I do live near a Burlington with a relentlessly advertised outlet mall, so I assumed the Coat Factory was connected from an early age.
#coats #presumptuous
posted by Rustmouth Snakedrill at 8:44 PM on September 19, 2013


twitter dollar bills #yall
posted by jason_steakums at 8:51 PM on September 19, 2013


Twitter dollars, holler holler, louder, louder, more, until your vocal cords break yes now you are ready now it can begin
posted by The Whelk at 8:58 PM on September 19, 2013


The White Tez#coatlipoca, Quetzal#coatal, rises in the west, with discount deals for the faithful. The setting of the Fifth Sun calls for STOCK LIQUIDATION and the great serpent will eat its own margins and pass the savings on to YOU. Tweeps will destroy you, like a Mexican god.
posted by jason_steakums at 9:06 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


Not affiliated with Burlington Industries! #trademarks
posted by dhartung at 11:47 PM on September 19, 2013 [1 favorite]


twitter
posted by dubitable at 1:28 AM on September 20, 2013 [1 favorite]


Cruella De Vil wanted a fur #coat made of puppies.
posted by double block and bleed at 1:44 AM on September 20, 2013


The UK had a similar thing a couple of years ago: Shippams Meat Paste (a brand and product that nobody had cared about for twenty years) apparently opened a Twitter account and began posting delightful messages written by a naive 'social media engagement intern' called Ben. In three weeks it attracted 10,000 followers. Unfortunately one of them was Shippams itself, unamused, who demanded that Twitter shut the account down. It turned out to be a fellow called Ed.
posted by Hogshead at 2:51 AM on September 20, 2013 [1 favorite]


The UK still has Bet Fair Poker, which is apparently real.

“You go outside. iOS 7 has failed to properly install. The sky is on fire. Your bus is an error message. Finally. The end times are here.”

“My prediction for Marseille vs Arsenal: The eagle will descend without mercy; the anvil will transform into hammer; dust will prevail.”
posted by Auz at 3:22 AM on September 20, 2013 [4 favorites]


In other Weird Sleeper Cell New Media News, something is going to happen in five days.
posted by Rock Steady at 6:57 AM on September 20, 2013 [1 favorite]


Betfair Poker has this lovely tweet up now:
"It's nice to see that The Evening Standard has named Danger Mouse as its Most Influential Londoner. Penfold is 967th."
posted by JHarris at 7:06 AM on September 20, 2013


Betfair: I have just installed iOS7 onto a young chaffinch. Its eyes are bulging and it's burping up pixels. I may have destroyed nature.
posted by forgetful snow at 9:19 AM on September 20, 2013 [1 favorite]


Result.
posted by maryr at 7:26 PM on September 20, 2013 [1 favorite]


According to a source who knows about these things (Ed, who I referenced in my earlier post) the Betfair Poker account has five writers on it.
posted by Hogshead at 11:47 AM on September 21, 2013 [1 favorite]


Do not approach the Burlington Coat Factory.
posted by The corpse in the library at 1:36 PM on September 21, 2013


Do not taunt the Burlington Coat Factory.
posted by The Whelk at 2:10 PM on September 21, 2013 [2 favorites]


Do not coat the Burlington Taunt Factory.
posted by JHarris at 3:57 PM on September 21, 2013


Do not factor the not-tawny blurting coat.
posted by moonmilk at 5:28 PM on September 21, 2013


Do not burl the Coatington Fact Tauntory.
posted by Rock Steady at 6:44 PM on September 21, 2013 [2 favorites]


No burle la Fábrica de Abrigos de Burlington
posted by Rustic Etruscan at 7:01 PM on September 21, 2013 [2 favorites]


No hablo coat.
posted by maryr at 7:32 AM on September 22, 2013 [1 favorite]


No se necesita hablar #coats ... sólo llevarlos
posted by Rustic Etruscan at 8:00 AM on September 22, 2013


And for everything else there's mastercard
posted by The Whelk at 8:52 AM on September 22, 2013 [1 favorite]


Looks like the fun's over:

@NotCoatFactory

Look like some people "say" #YeahWeDoLikeCoatsBigTime but no can have a joke yikes

The lawyers have make us say hey we just love #coats no big deal we know nothing for nothing.

posted by showbiz_liz at 1:19 PM on October 5, 2013 [2 favorites]


Eeek. I'd start going the other way after that.

"What happened #coat? You used to be so cool."

"Coats? They're okay. They're not going to change the world or anything."

"Some people are surprisingly defensive about their cold weather wear."

"If you're looking for a #coat, you could come to Burlington Coat Factory. Or, you know, wherever."

"The fashionable people are wearing sweaters this year."

"Do you know the conditions in which the alpacas that provided the wool for that #coat are kept?"

"Coats: a hidden history of shame and blood."

"You know who liked to wear #coats? Josef Stalin. There, I said it. The truth is out now."
posted by JHarris at 1:59 PM on October 5, 2013 [1 favorite]


It's time to Occupy #Coat! Who's with me?? #coat
posted by moonmilk at 7:44 PM on October 6, 2013 [3 favorites]


The fact that the new @NotCoatFactory is referring to the company as "Bullyton Coat Factory" has pretty much made my Monday morning.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 7:29 AM on October 7, 2013 [5 favorites]


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