"I got my other arm working, too. This game has everything!"
November 16, 2013 8:17 PM   Subscribe

Not content to simply riff on bad movies, Mike Nelson (formerly of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and currently of Rifftrax) recently visited the Video Game Abomination folks and played a little "Miami Traffic 3".
posted by AlonzoMosleyFBI (32 comments total) 12 users marked this as a favorite
 
If you like the concept of MST3Kifying video games, check out Unskippable from Loading Ready Run. Lots of great riffing on cutscenes.
posted by jiawen at 8:53 PM on November 16, 2013


One can tell it was ad libbed, unlike MST/RiffTrax, but when you have a game like this it almost doesn't matter.

I can't help but think this is like a few hundred versions before the game that became Hotline Miami.
posted by JHarris at 8:55 PM on November 16, 2013


Lowtax's channel has been a real guilty pleasure for me, even without Mike Nelson. I heart Shmorky's ridiculous, adorable voice.

Dontrel the Dolphin 2

Animated adventures of Lowtax et al.
posted by Countess Elena at 8:58 PM on November 16, 2013 [1 favorite]


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

More protogoons in the making!

That much sooner to take over the world!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Oh, ahem. Yes, Lowtax can be occasionally witty...
posted by Samizdata at 9:07 PM on November 16, 2013


I louvvveeeeee Mike Nelson. <3 I wish the dude would stop laughin' over his punchlines GOD
posted by stoneandstar at 9:17 PM on November 16, 2013


I dunno... Rifftrax and MST3K made fun of real, semi-professional movies. These games... Mocking these games feels like hurling low hanging fruit as defenseless thirteen year olds writing their first program. They're just... they're so bad it's not even worth making fun of them. Somebody put time and effort into writing those programs and while I'm not claiming we should pretend to like them, the internet already has plenty of people out there to say nasty things about them. I'm not sure this playthrough adds anything to what 4chan would already tell the author.
posted by maryr at 9:42 PM on November 16, 2013 [5 favorites]


These games... Mocking these games feels like hurling low hanging fruit as defenseless thirteen year olds writing their first program. They're just... they're so bad it's not even worth making fun of them.

You haven't seen Manos: Hands of Fate, have you?
posted by Foosnark at 9:45 PM on November 16, 2013 [4 favorites]


I love the Lowtax/Shmorky LPs. They pick awful Game Maker. games and joke about them, but they're never mean or disrespectful. They treat a lot of the games with the reverent awe of a six-year old kid discovering the mystique of gaming; it's great and funny.
posted by LSK at 9:47 PM on November 16, 2013


MST3K would deal with movies that are out of focus or poorly lit to the point of invisibility. Mike Nelson, Destroyer of Worlds, will not be deterred by a little clipping.

What's missing here is that ad libbed observations don't work as scripted riffs, not with source material this dire..
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 9:52 PM on November 16, 2013


I dunno... Rifftrax and MST3K made fun of real, semi-professional movies. These games... Mocking these games feels like hurling low hanging fruit as defenseless thirteen year olds writing their first program. They're just... they're so bad it's not even worth making fun of them.

I do kind of see what you mean. These GameMaker things are bad partly because it's a single person working on them, and partly because it's GameMaker, and you're intrinsically limited by it. I've made a few GM games in my time and they're okay, but that's mostly because I stuck to 2D. 3D, well, you're not going to rival GTA in it, even if you had a team of dozens.
posted by JHarris at 10:09 PM on November 16, 2013


If I had made this game, I would be pretty pleased to discover Mike Nelson riffing it, and just pleased I general that someone actually played it.
posted by Brocktoon at 10:28 PM on November 16, 2013 [1 favorite]


I in fact own Manos: The, errr, Hands of Fate? And it is awful. My personal explaination of the movie (completely independent of the actual facts, of course) is that they didn't know about editing, so they had to shoot each scene sequentially and in one take. That's why the driving scenes are so long - they didn't know how to cut so they had to film the entire drive over to the lot.

Manos hold such an amazing place in MST3K history because the movie is so, so, so terrible that you can't even make fun of it. It drains you of your will to mock. It just hobbles on, Torgo-like, bumbling and slow and without purpose, inexorably. Generally, the makers of MST3K didn't pick films like that because they aren't funny. (A lot of the humor in Manos is the lack of humor in Manos.)

That's how I feel about these games being reviewed here. Manos is the film to compare them to - they are terrible, badly made games. But while it's one of the most famous episodes, a must-watch, no one I know says it's their favorite. Now, maybe that's just my friends - I know we have nostalgic attachments to This Island Earth and Time Chasers - but where MST3K really shines is on B movies. I'd love to see the version of these Let's Plays where they cover, say, the M&M's Beach Party or Shaq Fu, or, hell, you know what would be fun to see? Big Buck Hunter (special note: I love Big Buck Hunter). But something that had to go through editing and testing and more than one person to say "Fuck it, good enough." This is just shooting badly animated fish in a pixelated barrel.
posted by maryr at 10:29 PM on November 16, 2013 [5 favorites]


Dontrel the Dolphin. The "Great Mountain" level. What the heck are those big round things in the background? They're oddly ominous and frightening.
posted by JHarris at 10:40 PM on November 16, 2013


I'd love to see the version of these Let's Plays where they cover, say, the M&M's Beach Party or Shaq Fu, or, hell, you know what would be fun to see? Big Buck Hunter (special note: I love Big Buck Hunter). But something that had to go through editing and testing and more than one person to say "Fuck it, good enough."

You might like Giant Bomb's series called "Quick Looks", they're pretty much this but with newer games.
posted by hellojed at 11:05 PM on November 16, 2013


Dontrel the Dolphin. The "Great Mountain" level. What the heck are those big round things in the background? They're oddly ominous and frightening.

To me, they look like blown up jpegs of colored glass beads, that are meant to symbolize precious jewels. Great big precious jewels. Presumably the running pumpkins of the Great Mountains have a mining based economy.
posted by GrumpyDan at 1:23 AM on November 17, 2013


Similarly, Diabetus and slowbeef of Retsupurae fame have been doing more riffs of complete playthroughs of actual games, both professional games and shitty Newgrounds junk. Most are available via their playlists page. A personal favorite of mine is the end of the Newgrounds videos where they read ridiculous comments from the Newgrounds pages for the games, like comments about how bad the game was that rate it 5/5.
posted by Pope Guilty at 4:07 AM on November 17, 2013


Mike Nelson has a beautiful ironic tone that I keep trying to imitate but I think he's going to have to change politics and be my neighbor so I can have lessons.
posted by angrycat at 5:42 AM on November 17, 2013 [2 favorites]


It would be better with Joel.
posted by sonascope at 5:47 AM on November 17, 2013 [6 favorites]


Monster A-Go Go was a far worse film than Manos, IMO.
posted by cj_ at 6:59 AM on November 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


Monster A-Go Go was a far worse film than Manos, IMO.

"Manos" at least has a discernible plot and characters, whereas "Monster A Go Go" was so disconcerting it was like a fever dream. "Miami Traffic 3" has more in common with the later.
posted by AlonzoMosleyFBI at 7:16 AM on November 17, 2013


It would be better with Joel.

No it wouldn't.
posted by Evilspork at 9:28 AM on November 17, 2013 [3 favorites]


he's going to have to change politics

...Aw, man. Until now, I lived in blissful ignorance.
posted by reprise the theme song and roll the credits at 9:58 AM on November 17, 2013


Sorry and I know your pain
posted by angrycat at 10:00 AM on November 17, 2013 [3 favorites]


I always liked that Mike Nelson was a Republican and would absolutely want him as my friend. He seems like the mythical intellectually honest conservative whose different politics I could disagree with but respect. I've always wanted one of those.
posted by willie11 at 10:04 AM on November 17, 2013 [3 favorites]


Mike Nelson's politics are especially odd if you've seen The Truck Farmer.
posted by Pope Guilty at 10:48 AM on November 17, 2013


Somebody put time and effort into writing those programs

Yes, but then somebody else made a shitty hack/clone of Vice City and replaced some of the people with Cheetahmen.
posted by ShutterBun at 1:21 PM on November 17, 2013 [2 favorites]


I dunno... Rifftrax and MST3K made fun of real, semi-professional movies. These games... Mocking these games feels like hurling low hanging fruit as defenseless thirteen year olds writing their first program.
Do you imply that my tightly internet family4pay is creepy goode sire
posted by This, of course, alludes to you at 2:26 PM on November 17, 2013


I don't mind their politics as they've managed to keep them separate from their comedy - as opposed to someone like P.J. O'Rourke whose go-to line is "LOL JUST LIKE DEMOCRATS AMIRITE?!?!"
posted by Evilspork at 4:33 PM on November 17, 2013 [5 favorites]


"Manos" at least has a discernible plot and characters, whereas "Monster A Go Go" was so disconcerting it was like a fever dream. "Miami Traffic 3" has more in common with the later.

It's impossible to precisely quantify badness. A friend from college thought Red Zone Cuba was worse than Manos. I've said it before, but I think all three are more watchable than Transformers 2, because they're not actively offensive.
posted by JHarris at 4:45 PM on November 17, 2013


I don't know. Being actively offended might be preferable than those passive car scenes where NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENS.
posted by maryr at 8:33 PM on November 17, 2013 [1 favorite]


My personal explaination of the movie (completely independent of the actual facts, of course) is that they didn't know about editing, so they had to shoot each scene sequentially and in one take.

The Manos wikipedia page explains the whole tragic affair.
posted by malocchio at 8:33 AM on November 18, 2013


You know, MST3K DID ad lib in the earliest days...and the outcome of that was them hiring head writer Mike Nelson.
posted by Chrysostom at 12:31 PM on November 18, 2013


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