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December 2, 2013 3:14 PM   Subscribe

A Linguist Explains the Rules of Summoning Benedict Cumberbatch. The same linguist elaborates.
posted by Rustic Etruscan (333 comments total) 51 users marked this as a favorite

 
It would be remiss of me if I didn't point out that the "linguist elaborates" link has Histogram Cumbergraphs. Because Histogram Cumbergraphs.

(Appropriately, Gretchen McCulloch has previously been cited in this article about the Because [Noun] phenomenon (FPP). Her blog is pretty spectacular in general.)
posted by Phire at 3:19 PM on December 2, 2013 [13 favorites]


Bendywatch Critterwums!
Candymance Fendermane!
Crusty crumbs Tinygarden!
posted by The Whelk at 3:23 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Englebert Humperdinck knew all about this years before anyone else.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 3:34 PM on December 2, 2013 [40 favorites]


You mean Slap Bum-whalla?
posted by The Whelk at 3:35 PM on December 2, 2013 [6 favorites]


Butawhiteguy Cantbekhan
posted by pxe2000 at 3:35 PM on December 2, 2013 [18 favorites]


You will know you have summoned him correctly if a dude appears who looks like a Jenga tower made of cheekbones
posted by FAMOUS MONSTER at 3:38 PM on December 2, 2013 [51 favorites]


So what you're saying is that Benedict Cumberbatch is the regeneration of Englebert Humperdinck? Who are the other 11?
posted by Elementary Penguin at 3:39 PM on December 2, 2013 [8 favorites]


Internet, I love you.
posted by Doleful Creature at 3:41 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


The other 11 are enumerated here, by Eddie Izzard.
posted by Jon Mitchell at 3:41 PM on December 2, 2013 [11 favorites]


Summoning Benedict Cumberbatch

To save everyone else the disappointment, none of these actually make Benedict Cumberbatch appear in your living room. Sad day.
posted by vytae at 3:43 PM on December 2, 2013 [8 favorites]


And almost anything works as long as you have those three syllables!

Bangarang Candybar
Sandalwood Razzmatazz
Hippogriff Alcatraz
Schmenedrict Schmumberschmatch
posted by 2bucksplus at 3:44 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Internet Overthink
posted by OHenryPacey at 3:45 PM on December 2, 2013 [17 favorites]


I thought I summoned him, but I looked closer and it was just a Michelangelo sculpture of Kenneth Williams that someone polished too much

easy mistake to make
posted by FAMOUS MONSTER at 3:46 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Hippogriff Alcatraz

Hey now you stay away from my Harry Potter/The Rock crossover fic!
posted by The Whelk at 3:47 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Chasuble Candleshoe!
Westminster Ponytrap!
Bitterwort Mountebank!
Βριάρεως κακοδαίμων!
[strews handfuls of slake lime, sal ammoniac, and Assam tea]
Benedictus of the thousand credits!
Be thou bound unto the second lead of my prestige biopic!
You'd make a great Charles Lindbergh!
posted by Iridic at 3:47 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Hey now you stay away from my Harry Potter/The Rock crossover fic!

For a second I thought you meant Dwayne Johnson, and I thought, sure, why not?
posted by Elementary Penguin at 3:48 PM on December 2, 2013 [14 favorites]


And almost anything works as long as you have those three syllables!

Except the point of the article is that that is not enough. Its also about stress which you are adding unconsciously. Example: Umbrella Falafel
posted by vacapinta at 3:49 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


here is more information on Harmonic Grammar

Wasn't she a student at Hogwarts?
posted by Joe in Australia at 3:50 PM on December 2, 2013 [21 favorites]


no, changing the first name to Benadryl and the last name to Cumberbund is all you need to do to make Hilarity Ensue. Everything beyond is crowd-sourced mob-mentality.
posted by oneswellfoop at 3:56 PM on December 2, 2013


My favorite is definitely Wimbledon Tennismatch.
posted by dialetheia at 3:59 PM on December 2, 2013 [12 favorites]


Baalzephon Zinderneuf!

Yeah, that's fun.
posted by prize bull octorok at 4:05 PM on December 2, 2013


It's really a shame he wasn't cast as Zaphod Beeblebrox.
posted by The World Famous at 4:06 PM on December 2, 2013 [17 favorites]


But Mos Def was perfect even if that movie was a hot mess.
posted by The Whelk at 4:09 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Cougarjohn Mellencamp
posted by Sys Rq at 4:11 PM on December 2, 2013 [25 favorites]


It's really a shame he wasn't cast as Zaphod Beeblebrox.

I always thought he'd make a great Ford Prefect, myself, though the name isn't quite as perfect. Always looks like he might bite your jugular at any moment, doesn't blink quite often enough, skin seems to be pulled backwards from the nose, could plausibly be from Betelgeuse...

On preview - Mos Def was Ford, Sam Rockwell was Zaphod (an inspired casting move if there ever was one - just needed more dancing).
posted by dialetheia at 4:11 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


I've been drinking and you are correct I shall return to my time cave til the next millennia.
posted by The Whelk at 4:13 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Betelgeuse Crackerjack
posted by islander at 4:17 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Betelgeuse!
Betelgeuse!
Betelgeuse!
posted by The Whelk at 4:20 PM on December 2, 2013


Comeonand Slamandjam
posted by jason_steakums at 4:22 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


who looks like a Jenga tower made of cheekbones

Voldemort and Nagini were in the chamber of secrets making babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me.
posted by elizardbits at 4:23 PM on December 2, 2013 [13 favorites]


Candlewick Bumpercar
posted by Sys Rq at 4:23 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Bibimbap Krugerrand

YES I ENJOY THIS HAHA
posted by prize bull octorok at 4:24 PM on December 2, 2013 [18 favorites]


Burningman Quarterback
posted by Sys Rq at 4:30 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Obligatory Bendytoots
posted by jason_steakums at 4:30 PM on December 2, 2013


Bartholomew Captainhat!
Branislav Coffeewhallah!
Oglethorpe Smoochyface!
Steve Jones! ...no, wait...
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 4:31 PM on December 2, 2013


Has anyone fed these into a machine learning algorithm to see what comes out when you ask it to generate more?

Are there corpus...es? corpi? with words as pronounced that you could use to generate ones that satisfy some number of constraints? Because that would be fun too.
posted by BungaDunga at 4:33 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


There are no corpi, only corgis.
posted by The Whelk at 4:34 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


I like to think he uses these names as his fake hotel check-in names.
posted by jason_steakums at 4:35 PM on December 2, 2013 [6 favorites]


No he uses Matt Smith

And vice versa.
posted by The Whelk at 4:36 PM on December 2, 2013 [9 favorites]


Bentonville, Arkan-sass
posted by jason_steakums at 4:36 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


FUCK you guys I went a little overboard and accidentally summoned Blibdoolpoolp, the Sea Mother of the Kuo-Toa

And I'm at work too crap crap crap
posted by prize bull octorok at 4:38 PM on December 2, 2013 [24 favorites]


Benetton Camoflage
Marmaduke Butterscotch
posted by Sys Rq at 4:40 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


To save everyone else the disappointment, none of these actually make Benedict Cumberbatch appear in your living room.

They could hardly tell you the right one, or everybody would know it and nobody would get to keep him for more than a few seconds. You just have to keep trying.
posted by Sequence at 4:42 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Crap, now I have double dactyls stuck in my head.
posted by still_wears_a_hat at 4:45 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Cumberland Fannypack
Remington Safetymatch
Caramilk Pocketwatch
posted by Sys Rq at 4:45 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Bendythwap Carmbysnood
posted by c'mon sea legs at 4:46 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Yeah, and just because Benedict Cumberbatch may seem affable and charming does not mean you don't need to draw a circle of protection. Safety first!
posted by prize bull octorok at 4:47 PM on December 2, 2013 [6 favorites]


Ok, good effort so far, team, now I want to see some that are also palindromes.
posted by yarrow at 4:47 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Billabong Cockatoo
Bungalow Cabbagepatch
posted by islander at 4:48 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Are there corpus...es? corpi?

Corpora.
posted by The Tensor at 4:48 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Buttermilk Toodlesnoot.
posted by maryr at 4:48 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Raymondlux Uryyacht
posted by Sys Rq at 4:50 PM on December 2, 2013


Bunnyfarts Carrotsmell
posted by islander at 4:51 PM on December 2, 2013 [27 favorites]


^ winner.
posted by maryr at 4:51 PM on December 2, 2013


Sloppyjoe Manwichbeef
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 4:51 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


That's more of a Big McLargeHuge.
posted by maryr at 4:52 PM on December 2, 2013 [13 favorites]


Builloncube Quiltedpatch
posted by prize bull octorok at 4:54 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Suffering Succotash
posted by Sys Rq at 4:54 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Sloppyjoe Manwichbeef

Supersize Happymeal
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 4:55 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Ok, good effort so far, team, now I want to see some that are also palindromes.

Poodlepoop Poopeldoop
posted by BungaDunga at 4:55 PM on December 2, 2013 [66 favorites]


Sequester Grundelplith

Wow, I forgot about this one.
posted by Sphinx at 4:57 PM on December 2, 2013


Butsherlock Canhazpost? Bigpremier Comingsoon.
posted by iamkimiam at 4:57 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Raymond Luxury Yacht
posted by The World Famous at 4:58 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Monstermash Graveyardsmash
posted by jason_steakums at 4:58 PM on December 2, 2013 [14 favorites]


Bumblebee Gingersnaps
posted by Sys Rq at 5:00 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


"Bibimbap Krugerrand"

::OMG. I can't breath. Can. Not Breath::

::cries hysterical tears of joy::
posted by Faintdreams at 5:00 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Waterpick Valuepack
posted by Sys Rq at 5:03 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Blunderbuss Hammerpants
posted by jason_steakums at 5:03 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Bandersnatch Cumberpants. Perhaps the first, definitely my only.
posted by vers at 5:04 PM on December 2, 2013


I am dangerously close to flipping out and hiding under my desk to laughcry

Billyclub Cuddleramp
posted by Sara C. at 5:06 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Rubaiyat Omarkhayyam
posted by elizardbits at 5:09 PM on December 2, 2013 [10 favorites]


Brief Matt Smith-related derail:

One of my former classmates is a dead ringer for Matt Smith, and he frequently got into scrapes and would ask me to help him. It's gotten to the point where I can't watch any Eleventh Doctor episodes without headdesking profusely and yelling out "OH DAN, NO, DON'T DO THAT"
posted by pxe2000 at 5:10 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Bunnyhug Rabbithutch
posted by Sys Rq at 5:10 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Billyzane Superfan
posted by jason_steakums at 5:10 PM on December 2, 2013 [7 favorites]


Centrifugal Bumblepuppy
posted by Merzbau at 5:11 PM on December 2, 2013 [6 favorites]


Poodlepoop Poopeldoop

flagged as Comment Of The Year
posted by elizardbits at 5:12 PM on December 2, 2013 [8 favorites]


Canada Googlemaps
posted by Sys Rq at 5:15 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Billygoat Clusterfuck
posted by parki at 5:16 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Berlinal Zanderplatz
posted by Sys Rq at 5:18 PM on December 2, 2013


Humptydance Isyourchance
posted by jason_steakums at 5:19 PM on December 2, 2013 [11 favorites]


Burlington Coatsforall.
posted by maryr at 5:20 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Poodlepoop Poopeldoop

My heart is warm with joy and glee.
posted by yarrow at 5:20 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Bumblebee Tunacan
posted by Sara C. at 5:26 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Bendykink Cocktailstraw
posted by islander at 5:27 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Polyglot Wunderkind
posted by jason_steakums at 5:28 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Whelk "two sheds" Strickland.
posted by The Whelk at 5:30 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Casserole Butterham
posted by Sara C. at 5:32 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Brokebackmount Cowboylove
posted by islander at 5:34 PM on December 2, 2013


Beelzebub Cultureclash
posted by Room 641-A at 5:35 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Bouillabaisse Conniptionfit
Bunglesnit Cabbagepatch
Balalaika Cuddlesnog
posted by droplet at 5:36 PM on December 2, 2013


Are we really going to continue the meme of making fun of a man's name when he's said that as a kid he was bullied for it? That seems un-compassionate.
posted by FritoKAL at 5:36 PM on December 2, 2013


Bulliedfor Uncompash
posted by Sys Rq at 5:37 PM on December 2, 2013 [18 favorites]


Bingeandpurge Crumplezone
posted by Merzbau at 5:38 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Are we really going to continue the meme of making fun of a man's name when he's said that as a kid he was bullied for it? That seems un-compassionate.

Yesweare Bunchadicks
posted by jason_steakums at 5:39 PM on December 2, 2013 [29 favorites]


Bangladesh Cortisol
posted by Merzbau at 5:40 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Bandicoot Cumbercrash
posted by Room 641-A at 5:41 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


I've gone from reading this thread to reading other things that aren't this thread and I have to keep convincing my brain to not try to force everything into this meter.

tl;dr Hardtoread Anything
posted by davidjmcgee at 5:41 PM on December 2, 2013 [6 favorites]


Barium Enemas
posted by en forme de poire at 5:41 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Bilderberg Conference
posted by Sys Rq at 5:42 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Barbeque Carrottop
Bendylegs Cankersore
Coronationstreet Barroombrawl
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 5:43 PM on December 2, 2013


Burgertime Cornershop
posted by Merzbau at 5:43 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Brandenburg Harpsichord
posted by en forme de poire at 5:45 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Benzylene Radical
posted by en forme de poire at 5:46 PM on December 2, 2013


Biggiesmalls Hypnotize
posted by jason_steakums at 5:48 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Bongwater Coffeeklatch
posted by Room 641-A at 5:48 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Buttercup Cornishhen
posted by Merzbau at 5:48 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Guinevere Chamberpot
posted by Sys Rq at 5:48 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Basilisk Cockatrice
posted by Merzbau at 5:49 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


U BOAT U BOATS
posted by benzenedream at 5:49 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Benzocaine Dentalwork
posted by en forme de poire at 5:49 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Rankinbass Martykrofft
posted by prize bull octorok at 5:49 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Good lord, the fun that the MST3K boys would have with ol' BC. I want a three hour Rifftrax of JUST them going on Cumberbatch synonyms, Big McLargehuge style.
posted by mediocre at 5:51 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Bangagong Getiton
posted by Merzbau at 5:52 PM on December 2, 2013 [8 favorites]


Einstuerzende Neubauten
posted by Sys Rq at 5:54 PM on December 2, 2013 [8 favorites]


Serpentine Lizardman
posted by jason_steakums at 5:56 PM on December 2, 2013


Trailerhitch Plumbercrack
posted by prize bull octorok at 5:56 PM on December 2, 2013 [6 favorites]


Booglarize Clearspotkid
posted by Merzbau at 5:58 PM on December 2, 2013


Bumbaclaat Wunderkind
posted by Sys Rq at 5:58 PM on December 2, 2013


Trailerhitch Plumbercrack

That's his American cousin.
posted by Etrigan at 5:59 PM on December 2, 2013 [10 favorites]


Mazeltov Abraham
posted by maryr at 6:01 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Bindlestaff Can'o'beans
posted by Merzbau at 6:01 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


a Jenga tower made of cheekbones

Only surpassed by H. R. Giger's brief and prematurely terminated contract with Coleco to design Cabbage Patch Kids

(Kenner made an Alien board game in 1979)
posted by zippy at 6:02 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


TrappedinBenedictCumberbatchnamejokefactory Pleasesendhelp
posted by Merzbau at 6:02 PM on December 2, 2013


Butternut Cantalope.
posted by maryr at 6:02 PM on December 2, 2013


Ottawa Senators
posted by Sys Rq at 6:03 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Hamilton Tigercats
posted by Sys Rq at 6:03 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Are we really going to continue the meme of making fun of a man's name when he's said that as a kid he was bullied for it? That seems un-compassionate.

Takeitto MetaTalk.
posted by maryr at 6:04 PM on December 2, 2013 [13 favorites]


Backpacker Cap'ncrunch
posted by Room 641-A at 6:05 PM on December 2, 2013


Bubblebutt Candyland
posted by Room 641-A at 6:06 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Mac'ncheese Pork'nbeans
posted by jason_steakums at 6:07 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Willywonk Chocolatefact
posted by Sys Rq at 6:07 PM on December 2, 2013


Internet Humblebrag
posted by jason_steakums at 6:09 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Benedict Cumberbatch
posted by davidjmcgee at 6:09 PM on December 2, 2013 [12 favorites]


Wait
posted by davidjmcgee at 6:09 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Bugaloo Pufnstuf
posted by Room 641-A at 6:10 PM on December 2, 2013


Pentateuch Stickleback
posted by prize bull octorok at 6:10 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Tinafey Racheldratch
posted by Sys Rq at 6:11 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Bedouin Underpants
posted by p3t3 at 6:11 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Rudyray Dolemite
posted by jason_steakums at 6:12 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


MORNINGTON CRESCENT
posted by davidjmcgee at 6:14 PM on December 2, 2013 [10 favorites]


Megamix Pornostache
posted by Sys Rq at 6:14 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Guys, how do you unsummon Pope Benedict XVI? Asking for a friend.
posted by Iridic at 6:15 PM on December 2, 2013 [37 favorites]


Jesuit Papacy
posted by Sys Rq at 6:16 PM on December 2, 2013 [15 favorites]


Emcee Hammerpants
posted by p3t3 at 6:20 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Generous Paperstacks
posted by Sys Rq at 6:21 PM on December 2, 2013


Shoppingmall Dippindots
posted by jason_steakums at 6:23 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Buttercup Princessbride
posted by Room 641-A at 6:24 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Lunatic Thunderclap
posted by Sys Rq at 6:24 PM on December 2, 2013


Only surpassed by H. R. Giger's brief and prematurely terminated contract with Coleco to design Cabbage Patch Kids

Alien Ridleyscott
posted by Room 641-A at 6:26 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Jesuschrist Superstar
posted by darkstar at 6:28 PM on December 2, 2013 [7 favorites]


Hasselhoff Snapplecaps
posted by jason_steakums at 6:30 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Oh my gosh, y'all...

*wipes tears*
posted by darkstar at 6:32 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Bailiwick Wifflebat
posted by Sys Rq at 6:34 PM on December 2, 2013


Bunnydip Rumblepak
posted by prize bull octorok at 6:34 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Ironon Jacketpatch
posted by Sys Rq at 6:36 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Bumbershoot Hackysack
posted by Room 641-A at 6:37 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Billabong Congaline
posted by Sys Rq at 6:38 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Buttonup Cameltoe.
posted by maryr at 6:39 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Chickenpox Calamine
posted by jason_steakums at 6:40 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Campervan Beethoven
posted by Sys Rq at 6:41 PM on December 2, 2013 [7 favorites]


Syllable Emphasis
posted by Merzbau at 6:42 PM on December 2, 2013 [8 favorites]


Krabbersgat Naviduct
posted by Sys Rq at 6:44 PM on December 2, 2013


Wangernumb Numberwang
posted by jason_steakums at 6:56 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Flappyjack Fluffypants
posted by The World Famous at 7:02 PM on December 2, 2013


Toblerone Pyramid
posted by jason_steakums at 7:06 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Spongeybob Squaredypants?
posted by The World Famous at 7:10 PM on December 2, 2013


Davidcross Oedenkirk
posted by davidjmcgee at 7:13 PM on December 2, 2013 [10 favorites]


Razortooth Whackamole
posted by Sara C. at 7:19 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


I heard him say in an interview: "Oh, my name. It's like a fart in the bath."
posted by selfmedicating at 7:20 PM on December 2, 2013 [7 favorites]


Gryffindor Hufflepuff
posted by The World Famous at 7:21 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Bootysmack Campervan
posted by elizardbits at 7:21 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Snugglefit Cozysheets
posted by Vectorcon Systems at 7:26 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Ropeadope Sleepervan
posted by invitapriore at 7:30 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Damnit I think subconscious suggestion from elizardbit's crept into mine. Scratch that one from the record.
posted by invitapriore at 7:31 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Camper Van Beethoven
posted by The World Famous at 7:32 PM on December 2, 2013


Bricabrac Superman
posted by invitapriore at 7:32 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Grundleface Mutterfuck
posted by invitapriore at 7:33 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Butterstick Chundersplash
posted by Sys Rq at 7:45 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Cineplex Moviepass
posted by Sys Rq at 7:46 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


Harmkorine Humpertrash
posted by Sys Rq at 7:58 PM on December 2, 2013


Leeloodallas Multipass
posted by darkstar at 7:59 PM on December 2, 2013 [13 favorites]


Limerence Mumbleglance
posted by tss at 8:02 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Weetabix Hungergames
posted by Sys Rq at 8:05 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


Bubblebutt Candyland

I think I'm gonna need directions
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 8:07 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Derelict Parallax
posted by dialetheia at 8:07 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Crackaddict Superhans
posted by Sys Rq at 8:11 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Threnody Murderpact
posted by dialetheia at 8:11 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Muscular Dystrophy
posted by Sys Rq at 8:13 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Heretic Monkeywrench
posted by Sys Rq at 8:25 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Hindenburg Zeppelin
posted by schwa at 8:28 PM on December 2, 2013


Crosbystills Nashandyoung
posted by Sys Rq at 8:29 PM on December 2, 2013 [6 favorites]


Beverly Shakenbake
posted by NoraReed at 8:32 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Morganfreeman Fingerpainted
posted by schwa at 8:34 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Joyofsect Hoverbikes
posted by Sys Rq at 8:37 PM on December 2, 2013


Rent-a-cop Handyman
posted by The World Famous at 8:39 PM on December 2, 2013


Oh god, I don't understand linguist talk.
posted by jenfullmoon at 8:41 PM on December 2, 2013


Buckaroo Banzai. Oops, no, that summons Peter Weller. Still great cheekbones, though.
posted by KHAAAN! at 8:48 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Cleverfic Titiousname
posted by schoolgirl report at 8:50 PM on December 2, 2013


Spockandkhan Trekkieslash
posted by jason_steakums at 8:53 PM on December 2, 2013 [3 favorites]


We'llhaveafewlaughs Shootzeeglass
posted by Ghidorah at 8:55 PM on December 2, 2013


Trickortreat Smellmyfeet
posted by p3t3 at 8:55 PM on December 2, 2013


Hotquiznos Haderach
posted by zippy at 9:15 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


HRGiger Puffnstuff
posted by zippy at 9:20 PM on December 2, 2013


Quickening Therecanbeonlyone
posted by Ghidorah at 9:24 PM on December 2, 2013


Highlander Cabertoss
posted by zippy at 9:45 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Stockphoto Editbatch
posted by NoraReed at 9:46 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


I heard him say in an interview: "Oh, my name. It's like a fart in the bath."

Bathingfart Nomdeplume
posted by en forme de poire at 9:46 PM on December 2, 2013 [7 favorites]


Binutils Custompatch
posted by alikins at 9:55 PM on December 2, 2013 [4 favorites]


BBC VIP
posted by islander at 10:13 PM on December 2, 2013


Benetton Colorfast
posted by alikins at 10:23 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Bestintheworld AtwhatIdo
posted by Ghidorah at 10:29 PM on December 2, 2013


Benadryl's Behindtheglass
posted by Ghidorah at 10:29 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Buildabear Comesapart.
posted by alikins at 10:31 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Espadrilles Socks'n'spats
posted by jason_steakums at 10:38 PM on December 2, 2013


Validate Parkingpass
posted by jason_steakums at 10:38 PM on December 2, 2013 [5 favorites]


Tenement Marketcrash
posted by dialetheia at 11:34 PM on December 2, 2013 [1 favorite]


Ninetydays Sameascash
posted by NMcCoy at 11:44 PM on December 2, 2013 [2 favorites]


Twentybucks Sameasintown
posted by Ghidorah at 11:54 PM on December 2, 2013


Bartleby Crumpetcrotch
posted by threeants at 1:12 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Bentobox Calabash
posted by threeants at 1:14 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Bakingsheet Cookiebatch

Bugreport Systemcrash

Bunnelby Aegislash
posted by NMcCoy at 1:26 AM on December 3, 2013 [3 favorites]


yarrow: "Ok, good effort so far, team, now I want to see some that are also palindromes"

Cablemac Camelbac
posted by team lowkey at 1:27 AM on December 3, 2013 [4 favorites]


Mistletoe Panamax
posted by threeants at 1:30 AM on December 3, 2013


Windowpane Brillopad
posted by threeants at 1:31 AM on December 3, 2013


Barleywine Cummerbund
posted by threeants at 1:32 AM on December 3, 2013


Derelict Dissipate
posted by Pendragon at 1:45 AM on December 3, 2013


Thunderthigh Genderfuck
posted by threeants at 1:46 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Arthropod Cinderblock
posted by threeants at 1:47 AM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Dumbledore Centerfold
posted by threeants at 1:49 AM on December 3, 2013 [4 favorites]


Pumpkinseed Fungalgrowth
posted by threeants at 1:55 AM on December 3, 2013


AOL CompuServe
posted by NMcCoy at 1:58 AM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Riverdance Untermensch
posted by threeants at 2:05 AM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Waterstain Samizdat
posted by threeants at 2:06 AM on December 3, 2013


Funnelcake Pretzelsauce
posted by threeants at 2:07 AM on December 3, 2013


Matterhorn Linzertorte
posted by threeants at 2:09 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Cattleprod Renaissance
posted by threeants at 2:10 AM on December 3, 2013


help
posted by threeants at 2:11 AM on December 3, 2013 [5 favorites]


CamelCap Pontifex
posted by threeants at 2:14 AM on December 3, 2013


Nipplering Cataract
posted by threeants at 2:15 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Trundlebed Butterfat
posted by threeants at 2:17 AM on December 3, 2013


Operation threeants!
Syllable normalize!
Bidyougood daygoforth!
posted by iamkimiam at 2:18 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Gingerbread Macklemore
posted by threeants at 2:37 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Canticle Paprikash
posted by threeants at 2:37 AM on December 3, 2013


Gilgamesh Pimpernel
posted by threeants at 2:45 AM on December 3, 2013


Guggenheim Paddleboat
posted by threeants at 2:46 AM on December 3, 2013


Ozymandias Kingofkings
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 4:29 AM on December 3, 2013


Fiddlestick Betamax
posted by jonnyploy at 5:10 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Callgamestop Askforbattletoads
posted by Ghidorah at 5:13 AM on December 3, 2013


IKEA MONKEY

wait
posted by elizardbits at 6:27 AM on December 3, 2013


Berthillon Parisfrance
Riversong Captainjack
Edmonton Halifax
Plateofbeans Taterpants
Bombadil Shadowfax
posted by dywypi at 6:30 AM on December 3, 2013


PowderedToast Whizzleteets
Grimaceface Burglarmask
Raisetheroof Grabthemic
posted by GrapeApiary at 6:46 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Mintysnatch Puntercunch
posted by slogger at 6:47 AM on December 3, 2013


Brendlewhat Hermitthrush
posted by Rustic Etruscan at 7:33 AM on December 3, 2013


I was trying to think of what this reminded me of, and it was these "Higgledy Piggledy" poems that Games Magazine used to publish in the 1980s. Nonsense first line, double dactyl proper name (making it a cousin of a clerihew) for the second line. As such:

Higgledy piggledy
Benedict Cumberbatch
Cheekbones and dactyls together at last.

Once kids made fun of him
Now his fans worship him
Can adulation make up for the past?
posted by yarrow at 7:52 AM on December 3, 2013 [15 favorites]


Vegemite Chundermen
Brundlefly Telepod
posted by jason_steakums at 8:21 AM on December 3, 2013


Debbaderp Mungbunglung
Mezzelthurst Wimpliston
Kajagoo Gootooshy
Corazon Translatesheart
Bindletip Fempletarp
Itsagood Hobbitname
posted by GrapeApiary at 9:00 AM on December 3, 2013


Whifflebat Multipass
posted by insufficient data at 9:04 AM on December 3, 2013


Santaclaus Puppypaws
posted by jason_steakums at 9:06 AM on December 3, 2013


Bumblebee Cattleranch
posted by insufficient data at 9:09 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Sticksnstones Notascratch
posted by insufficient data at 9:30 AM on December 3, 2013


Ticklish Nudibranch
posted by Sys Rq at 10:27 AM on December 3, 2013 [3 favorites]


Aceofbase Sawthesign
posted by jason_steakums at 10:32 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Benedek Königgrätz
posted by Sys Rq at 10:33 AM on December 3, 2013


Casio Databank
posted by Sys Rq at 10:36 AM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Feminist Underclass
posted by Sys Rq at 10:41 AM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Hunkahunk Burninglove
posted by Sys Rq at 10:44 AM on December 3, 2013


Twentysix Thundercats
posted by Sys Rq at 10:56 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Flehmening Kittycat
posted by jason_steakums at 10:57 AM on December 3, 2013


Icantbelieveitsnot Lennykravitz
posted by mediocre at 10:59 AM on December 3, 2013


Cookiepuss Fudgywhale
posted by Sys Rq at 11:19 AM on December 3, 2013 [3 favorites]


Dumbledore Hogwarthog
posted by GrapeApiary at 11:21 AM on December 3, 2013


Thatcherite Supperclub
posted by Sys Rq at 11:26 AM on December 3, 2013 [3 favorites]


Penitent Summersquash
posted by Sys Rq at 11:32 AM on December 3, 2013


Robotron Champion
posted by jason_steakums at 11:34 AM on December 3, 2013


Onlythepenitent Manshallpass
posted by mediocre at 11:34 AM on December 3, 2013


Babaloo Candycrush

I love seeing the free association exercises that these types of threads become.
posted by Room 641-A at 11:36 AM on December 3, 2013


Miami Soundmachine
posted by jason_steakums at 11:45 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Pessimist Filofax
posted by Sys Rq at 11:45 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Gloria Estefan
posted by Sys Rq at 11:46 AM on December 3, 2013 [7 favorites]


Tinkertoy Lincolnlog
posted by jason_steakums at 11:47 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Penetrate Subterfuge
posted by Sys Rq at 11:49 AM on December 3, 2013


Hammersmith Odeon
posted by jason_steakums at 11:52 AM on December 3, 2013


President Shaqattack
posted by Sys Rq at 11:56 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Pixystix Lumberjack
posted by Sys Rq at 11:59 AM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


ThenamesBrett FavrenotFarve
posted by GrapeApiary at 12:03 PM on December 3, 2013


Frumious bandersnatch
posted by freecellwizard at 12:11 PM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Carlton Bankscandance
posted by GrapeApiary at 12:19 PM on December 3, 2013


Mario Mario
posted by jason_steakums at 12:24 PM on December 3, 2013


Chocolate Dulcolax
posted by Sys Rq at 12:36 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Bagomilk Downthehatch
posted by lauranesson at 12:41 PM on December 3, 2013


Fartinbath Lightamatch
posted by lauranesson at 12:43 PM on December 3, 2013


Algerhiss Pumpkinpatch
posted by lauranesson at 12:45 PM on December 3, 2013


Violin Bowingscratch
posted by lauranesson at 12:47 PM on December 3, 2013


Bindlestick Fiberglass
posted by Sys Rq at 12:50 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Standandsit Sundaymass
posted by lauranesson at 12:51 PM on December 3, 2013


Twiceyoucan Counttothree
posted by GrapeApiary at 12:55 PM on December 3, 2013


Helloagain Freethrowline
posted by Room 641-A at 12:56 PM on December 3, 2013


Beautiful Cabbages
posted by Sys Rq at 12:57 PM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Readyfor Bigboypants
posted by lauranesson at 12:59 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Elephant Jumpingjacks
posted by Sys Rq at 1:08 PM on December 3, 2013


Hurryup Shakealeg
posted by lauranesson at 1:09 PM on December 3, 2013


WillyBard Shake-a-spear
posted by OHenryPacey at 1:10 PM on December 3, 2013


Gremlinstwo Thenewbatch
posted by Sys Rq at 1:14 PM on December 3, 2013


RUF-I-OOOO! RUF-I-OOOOO!
posted by jason_steakums at 1:21 PM on December 3, 2013


Buyinbulk Valuepack
posted by lauranesson at 1:24 PM on December 3, 2013 [3 favorites]


Hodorho Dohodor
posted by Sara C. at 1:34 PM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


So this is well into the territory of East/West College Bowl at this point.
posted by invitapriore at 2:39 PM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Fentanyl Zumbaclass
posted by prize bull octorok at 2:43 PM on December 3, 2013 [5 favorites]


Sertraline Trazodone
posted by invitapriore at 2:51 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


FritoKAL: "Are we really going to continue the meme of making fun of a man's name when he's said that as a kid he was bullied for it? That seems un-compassionate."

Huhn, weird then that he had no problem repeatedly misgendering Brenda Manning in a interview...
posted by ShawnStruck at 2:59 PM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Is it really unusual for someone who has experienced bullying to later engage in similar bullying?
posted by The World Famous at 3:11 PM on December 3, 2013


Benelux Hollaback
posted by prize bull octorok at 3:23 PM on December 3, 2013


Brindlestiff Tumbleweed
posted by zippy at 3:23 PM on December 3, 2013


Bosonhiggs Condensate
posted by zippy at 3:38 PM on December 3, 2013 [4 favorites]


Crosbystills Nashandyoung
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 3:46 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Winstonsmith Minitrue
posted by Elementary Penguin at 3:54 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Blanketstitch Garbagecan
posted by Sys Rq at 3:56 PM on December 3, 2013


Raymond Luxury Yacht
posted by The World Famous at 7:58 PM on December 2


Camper Van Beethoven
posted by The World Famous at 10:32 PM on December 2


Crosbystills Nashandyoung
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 6:46 PM on December 3


Violates Copyright
posted by Sys Rq at 4:06 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Bona fide parody.
posted by The World Famous at 4:42 PM on December 3, 2013


Battlestar Galactica
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 5:20 PM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Freedomrock Turnitup
posted by zippy at 5:34 PM on December 3, 2013


Sauceandcheese Pizzapie
posted by NoraReed at 5:43 PM on December 3, 2013


Chicagostyle Isnotpizza
posted by zippy at 5:51 PM on December 3, 2013


That doesn't fit the formula right. It'd have to be Chicagostyle Doesnotcount or something.

Yeah, I'm also a dick about haiku(s).
posted by NoraReed at 5:52 PM on December 3, 2013 [4 favorites]


Chicagostyle Inthetrash
posted by zippy at 5:55 PM on December 3, 2013 [3 favorites]


Verygood Bettername
posted by NoraReed at 6:00 PM on December 3, 2013 [1 favorite]


Thankyouso Verymuch
posted by zippy at 6:11 PM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


I posted this article on my facebook wall and my friend responded:

Butterfree Rapidash
posted by showbiz_liz at 7:10 PM on December 3, 2013 [4 favorites]


PinkiePie RainbowDash
posted by Elementary Penguin at 7:16 PM on December 3, 2013 [2 favorites]


Angela Lansbury.
posted by tzikeh at 7:38 PM on December 3, 2013 [5 favorites]


No, no -- Jerry Dorsey! I like Jerry Dorsey!
posted by tzikeh at 8:00 PM on December 3, 2013


Onedaylate Dollarshort
posted by GrapeApiary at 5:28 AM on December 4, 2013


Standing Ovationtime
posted by Zozo at 2:59 PM on December 4, 2013


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