*bear hugs*
January 6, 2014 8:41 AM   Subscribe

Have you ever wished that you had an array of reaction gifs featuring hilarious medieval art? u don't say. Previously.
posted by bq (37 comments total) 33 users marked this as a favorite

 
I'm ok with this
posted by Flashman at 8:51 AM on January 6 [1 favorite]


I...did not know how much I needed these to exist.
posted by booksrgr8 at 8:56 AM on January 6 [4 favorites]


Gifs?
posted by yoink at 9:00 AM on January 6 [9 favorites]


I thought the frownie face was the best, but then I went one further down.

Humans, never change, k?
posted by jillithd at 9:01 AM on January 6 [2 favorites]


I like these, thanks!
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 9:04 AM on January 6


yoink, most actually seem to be JPEGs, with the occasional PNG. I think the post uses GIF as a catch-all term for an image macro, which I think might be becoming more common as this becomes the primary remaining usage case for GIF.

To fill in: GIF, JPEG and PNG are different image file formats. They each have their place, although due to its limitations (most due to its age, it predates the popular internet) GIF is mostly used these days as an animation format, which JPEG and PNG don't support. (There is a variant of PNG that supports animation, but it hasn't caught on.)
posted by JHarris at 9:06 AM on January 6 [2 favorites]


(Although I just discovered that there is APNG as well, which actually has support in Firefox, as this Wikipedia page demonstrates.)
posted by JHarris at 9:09 AM on January 6


I guess I think of "reaction gif" as exclusively meaning animated gifs. I can't remember the last time I saw a non-animated .gif file. I sat staring at these for a while waiting for the gifs to "finish loading."

Still, I guess the rather overbroad application of the term "gif" goes along with the rather overbroad definition of "medieval."
posted by yoink at 9:15 AM on January 6 [11 favorites]


Okay, I don't feel so stupid now sitting and waiting for them to start moving.
posted by Curious Artificer at 9:18 AM on January 6 [6 favorites]


Maaaannnn the fonts/font colours do not do justice to the awesomeness of these images and the excellence of their selection. Many of these are great, but many are allllllmost perfect.

Great link though, thanks. I'm still very glad these exist.
posted by AAALASTAIR at 9:26 AM on January 6 [1 favorite]


I regret nothing.
posted by MonkeyToes at 9:30 AM on January 6


taint
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 9:31 AM on January 6 [1 favorite]


Medieval artists really captured the scrotum in all its glory.
posted by dr_dank at 9:38 AM on January 6 [5 favorites]


Got Medieval is nowadays gathering dust, but also has a trove of silly marginalia.
posted by sukeban at 9:44 AM on January 6 [2 favorites]


Medieval artists really captured the scrotum in all its glory.
posted by dr_dank


epenisterical?
posted by zippy at 9:53 AM on January 6 [2 favorites]


One thing that always struck me about medieval art is that women's breasts were depicted as being really round and really far apart from one another. Was this an idealization of the female body or a depiction of reality among women back then?
posted by These Birds of a Feather at 9:54 AM on January 6


The medieval butt is my favorite. I also like Discarding Images (which I'm pretty sure has been on the blue before) for this kind of image, sadly without the macro text.
posted by immlass at 10:00 AM on January 6 [3 favorites]


This is probably the discussion I can think of in which a link to this highly inappropriate medieval animated gif is ever going to be remotely contextual, so I'm going to go ahead and share it.
posted by usonian at 10:01 AM on January 6 [6 favorites]


I like this but in case anyone was eager for "real" reaction GIFs, check out /r/EditingAndLayout/. Unfortunately not medieval, but nonetheless well-made GIFs.
posted by exogenous at 10:03 AM on January 6


I'm only so-so on MedievalPOC as a site, but the image macros are hilarious.
posted by Sara C. at 10:13 AM on January 6


One thing that always struck me about medieval art is that women's breasts were depicted as being really round and really far apart from one another. Was this an idealization of the female body or a depiction of reality among women back then?

A lot of medieval artists were clerics and, as such, would not have seen a lot of unclothed female breasts.

It's sort of like asking a bunch of talented 14 year old girls to paint lifelike penises.
posted by Sara C. at 10:17 AM on January 6 [5 favorites]


A lot of medieval artists were clerics and, as such, would not have seen a lot of unclothed female breasts.

Oh, from what one reads about Medieval clerics, they saw plenty of unclothed female breasts. They just weren't that interested in representational fidelity. They saw lots of hands, for example, but the hands they paint are highly stylized and unnatural, just like the breasts.
posted by yoink at 10:27 AM on January 6 [7 favorites]


These Birds of a Feather: "One thing that always struck me about medieval art is that women's breasts were depicted as being really round and really far apart from one another. Was this an idealization of the female body or a depiction of reality among women back then?"

Purely style. Both male and female pudenda were also stylized, and for that matter, so was hair (and hands as yoink mentions).

The early- to mid-fourteenth saw fashions that emphasized what is sometimes called (today) the "monoboob" look; boobs were flattened into a sloping shelf, and small breasts were clearly preferred. Late-fourteenth saw the introduction of a deep decolletee neckline, exposing cleavage, and so clearly larger breasts gained favor in depictions of "beauty".

But basically: throughout it all there is a vernacular style for "these are good-looking breasts", "these are the breasts of an unattractive, older woman", "these are hands", etc.

At this point, the artists are emerging from an era where color choices were mandated by Church meanings (plants were depicted in blue, not green, for symbolic reasons), and deviances could mean punishment; individual style was not "a thing" they really pursued.
posted by IAmBroom at 10:35 AM on January 6 [9 favorites]


... women's breasts were depicted as being really round and really far apart from one another.

Cheap implants.

Also, agreeing with immlass that Discarded Images is cool, and updates fairly regularly. I really liked this recent image, "Sweep the Letters".
posted by benito.strauss at 10:38 AM on January 6 [1 favorite]


It's sort of like asking a bunch of talented 14 year old girls to paint lifelike penises.

So ..DeviantArt?
posted by The Whelk at 10:43 AM on January 6 [9 favorites]


Guys what if medieval marginalia was the DeviantArt of its day???????
posted by Sara C. at 10:48 AM on January 6 [5 favorites]


This pleases me. I want to give everyone I know a naked titty dragon hug.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 11:10 AM on January 6 [5 favorites]


Came for animated image, stayed for flatulence frozen in time.
posted by Atreides at 11:33 AM on January 6 [1 favorite]


NSFW(ish) tag, please?
posted by schmod at 11:36 AM on January 6


Play him hence, Lute Cat!
posted by Dr-Baa at 11:49 AM on January 6 [10 favorites]


I was expecting something more like Scorpion Dagger (which is awesome).
posted by burnmp3s at 12:09 PM on January 6 [4 favorites]


NOT GIFS SORRY!!!!
posted by bq at 12:26 PM on January 6 [1 favorite]


IAmBroom: "(plants were depicted in blue, not green, for symbolic reasons)"

Sounds interesting, care to elaborate?
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 1:19 PM on January 6


Images far, far funnier without the dopey comic sans "SeeIWasn'tSureYou'dGetItSoIThoughtAGiantMalletWasNecessary" text.
posted by Emperor SnooKloze at 1:37 PM on January 6


Sure, Joakim.

Up until a certain point (late 14th, perhaps? This isn't actually my area of expertise), limners (painters) mostly dealt in four shades: black (ink or paint), red, blue, and gold (24k foil, bonded onto the page, usually). So, as far as colors in the sense we usually think of them, illuminations (in Western Europe) were largely red & blue.

The symbolic reason is that red represented the blood of Christ, and blue represented Faith.

The economic reason is that long-lasting, non-corrosive (to vellum), easy-to-obtain pigments were primarily blue and red tones (azurite, ultramarine, and turnsole for blue; madder, European cochineal, and mercuric compounds for red).

So, the Church is making 99% of the books; the Church buys 99% of the pigments and employs 99% of the book limners; the Church creates symbolic meanings behind its color choices.

Purple, of course, implied royalty, but a long-lasting purple is to this day difficult to achieve. Despite what your primary-school art teacher taught you, most red paints mixed with blue paints make a very unattractive purple, if not a purply brown or gray.

Green could be made from copper compounds, of course. I'm not sure if most of these (known to the Medieval artists) are transient, like the purples, or corrosive (like some black inks).

ASIDE: Green was certainly favored (along with red) for wax seals - the kind used to "sign" every high-$ contract - for an interesting reason: the green and red used were both strongly antifungal and antibacterial, so they inhibited the decay of the wax seals. (There's a learning process that goes on: at first seals might be blue or yellow or brown, but when they discovered old land treaties were falling apart unless the seals were red or green, there's a shift that occurs. We know what colors were originally tried, because the seals were often protected in little bags which would retain the dust remains of the rotted seals.

So, probably for sound reasons, green was avoided, but of course the Church attaches symbolic reasons. Green represents "change": everything from seeds sprouting to weeds taking over the cemetary. And nothing is as abhorrent to the medieval Church as change... Even today, the RC Church is notoriously uncomfortable with even the slightest bit of it, as when Pope Francis ceremonially washes a woman's foot.

When did this disdain for colors outside of blue & red fade away? Sometime in the magical, 14th-century (The One True Century, amongst my folk ;) ), I think.

Here's a GIS for 12th-century illumination.
Here's a GIS for 13th-century illumination.
Here's a GIS for 14th-century illumination.
Here's a GIS for 15th-century illumination.

You'll see some greens even as far back as the 12th-century, which seems to contradict my thesis of the "moral value" of green being distasteful to the Church, but look closer at how it is used. In this picture, Gabriel (I think) and Jesus are backed by red & blue, respectively; the "unwise" peasants in crude clothing made of furs are turning away from Christ, backed by a green and changeable world. Clearly, towards the red & blue is where the wise would go!
posted by IAmBroom at 2:03 PM on January 6 [26 favorites]


This pleases me. I want to give everyone I know a naked titty dragon hug.


I can already do this, because I happen to have a great big naked titty dragon tattoed on my arm.

All of my hugs are great big naked titty dragon hugs forever.
posted by louche mustachio at 5:07 AM on January 7 [1 favorite]


dude. no.
posted by louche mustachio at 5:11 AM on January 7


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