Skip

Chanel, Dior, Lagerfeld, Givenchy, Gaultier
February 4, 2014 11:51 AM   Subscribe

The women's magazine parody The Reductress (previously) has unleashed the end-all be-all of brand-dropping, pill-popping nightlife columns: Slave To The Night Thoughts by Our Nightlife Editor, Dafna VanClifton
posted by The Whelk (20 comments total) 12 users marked this as a favorite

 
Can't wait for her semi-autobiographical novel "Boys Are Tall".
posted by Potomac Avenue at 12:26 PM on February 4 [2 favorites]


Green juice fixes all.
posted by Kitty Stardust at 12:27 PM on February 4


People still go to Balthazar?
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 12:28 PM on February 4


If William Gibson circa Neuromancer wrote women's magazine nightlife articles.
posted by MartinWisse at 12:29 PM on February 4 [2 favorites]


People still go to Balthazar?

It's open early and where else are you going to find French intro food in SoHo?
posted by The Whelk at 12:32 PM on February 4


Not weirder or wittier than an average Cat Marnell column, just less morally confusing because no actual sex/pill/attention addicts were self-harmed.
posted by nicwolff at 12:38 PM on February 4 [1 favorite]


People still go to Balthazar?

It's open early and where else are you going to find French intro food in SoHo?


*Note: I have no idea where "people" "go" in NYC at any hour. I am so very painfully unhip, but thought I'd throw out an "ironic" joke in the style of one who reads/writes these types of articles.

Note Note: I did go to Balthazar once on a business trip and it was AWESOME, but that was like 10 or 12 years ago because a colleague of mine saw it on Sex and the City.

posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 12:38 PM on February 4 [2 favorites]


LACROIX, DARLING, LACROIX.

I think AbFab and Stefon may have spoiled me for any other parody in this milieu.

("The Single Best Face for Any Haircut" was ringing all my "Yes Yes It's Funny cause It's True" bells, though.)
posted by The Underpants Monster at 12:54 PM on February 4 [3 favorites]


No, nobody still goes to Balthazar.

Well, tourists who saw it on Sex and the City still go to Balthazar. They're the same demo that's been propping up the foul cupcakes at Magnolia's far past what should have been their normal life cycle.
posted by Itaxpica at 12:54 PM on February 4 [1 favorite]


You can draw a straight line from Less Than Zero to this.

(Then you would do the line.)
posted by griphus at 1:04 PM on February 4 [4 favorites]


They're the same demo that's been propping up the foul cupcakes at Magnolia's far past what should have been their normal life cycle.

God, even the unhip like me know the foul cupcake thing is DONE! (Mainly because we have so goddamn many of those nasty cake holes around DC)
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 1:07 PM on February 4 [1 favorite]


We're currently at Peak Meatball.
posted by The Whelk at 1:11 PM on February 4 [3 favorites]


Yeah, baozi seem to be sweeping the hipsters now, judging by the little old Chinese lady at the corner of Union Market in DC with the line of hungover 20-somethings shelling out $2 a pop for the things that go for ten cents a dozen on the Beijing streets (and hers aren't even that good).
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 1:22 PM on February 4


Somehow, I thought of Very Mary Kate when I read this.
posted by gemutlichkeit at 1:24 PM on February 4


that sounds like something a dragon would say
posted by The Whelk at 1:34 PM on February 4 [1 favorite]


i guess i haven't gone out in a while, and have pretty much stopped going out in Manhattan altogether, but this sounds more like the mid '90's/early '00's than now. otherwise it rings fairly true: my old room mate used to have a friend who was like "the face of Chanel" or something (maybe just a fit model, but i'm pretty sure she did runway), anyho, my roomie would clean this woman's apartment while hanging out just because it was so gross, and in amongst the wadded up Chanel suits and various filthy couture, she'd find un-cashed checks for like $10,000.00/ $15,000.00. i think the biggest one she found was $25,000.00. un-cashed, laying in amongst the dust bunnies and coke-vials. no shit, no exaggeration.

i might just be too old now to run into them anymore, but, parody or no, these people did once exist. at one time i think anyone who lived in the city who had at least some kind of style was a model for something or other.
posted by Conrad-Casserole at 1:42 PM on February 4


I can tell you with great confidence that these people do still exist.
posted by The Whelk at 1:44 PM on February 4 [2 favorites]


Fwiw, I didn't mean that cupcakes in general are played out (though they are), but that Magnolia's cupcakes in particular are and have always been terrible. They taste like pucks of play-doh covered in way too much icing (take this from a man who ate far too much play-doh in his childhood for his own good).

Their banana pudding is pretty great though.
posted by Itaxpica at 2:12 PM on February 4 [1 favorite]


Itaxpica, even before i finished reading your comment i had planned on weighing in in favor of that banana pudding.
posted by Conrad-Casserole at 2:28 PM on February 4 [1 favorite]


This sounds like a Reader's Digest take on Cat Marnell's charmed life
posted by msali at 9:39 PM on February 4 [1 favorite]


« Older MRS. P.J. GILLIGAN   |   Every morning she reads the... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments



Post