He ain't smart, he just gestures that way
February 4, 2014 1:59 PM   Subscribe

 
*makes [+] gesture*
posted by Rock Steady at 2:00 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


All of these are effective, but only if immediately followed by jazz hands.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 2:05 PM on February 4, 2014 [13 favorites]


Check out my One Weird Gesture to express how I feel about the fact that ESC no longer stops animated gifs from looping in Firefox.
posted by Wolfdog at 2:07 PM on February 4, 2014 [12 favorites]


Every Apple keynote speech.
posted by cazoo at 2:10 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


Of course, if you have a pair of glasses so that you can nibble on one of the temple tips while nodding gravely, then you really are smart.
posted by mr. digits at 2:11 PM on February 4, 2014 [4 favorites]


I find that for Marcuse or Lacan, one usually needs to go full Piter De Vries.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 2:11 PM on February 4, 2014 [3 favorites]


My deconstruction professor used that dang "turning" gesture (or variations thereof) at least once during any given lecture, and always at the point when you felt like you were going to lose your mind, right there in the lecture room.

...of course, it is more effective when delivered during an extended rant on ethical imperatives, Lacan & Derrida. It might also be the main thing that I remember from said lectures, which does not speak well of me. I spent most of the time going "wait, what?"

And so we come to The Turning...
posted by aramaic at 2:13 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


I've got a certain hand gesture in mind by way of response to this article. Not as intellectual, but invaluable in many an argument.
posted by Behemoth at 2:16 PM on February 4, 2014 [3 favorites]


Hmmmmm *narrows eyes, strokes chin with thumb and forefinger, nods slightly*
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 2:16 PM on February 4, 2014 [5 favorites]


When someone's speaking to you, clasp your hands together, steeple your index fingers and point them just below your lower lip. Now you can think about any goddamn thing you want because it looks like you're listening hard and thinking of an intelligent response. After a pause you can just nod without saying anything, and they'll be relieved that what they just said passed muster with you.
posted by George_Spiggott at 2:19 PM on February 4, 2014 [13 favorites]


This site is linked in the article.

The "flexing academic muscle" gesture I know better as "finger tenting," and is seen pretty commonly up here in Boston--Harvard and MIT policy types, I'm looking at you.

I fucking hate it.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 2:19 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


Request to have these as inline gifs.
posted by 2bucksplus at 2:19 PM on February 4, 2014 [8 favorites]


Also useful, the "Multiple Levels" gesture: The hand is held upright, fingers bent at a right angle to the palm, to indicate a certain level. The hand can then be quickly raised or lowered to a new level to indicate going "up" or "down" a metaphorical level in the discussion.
posted by Rock Steady at 2:19 PM on February 4, 2014 [3 favorites]


What do you mean "look like" you prole? ::dismissive gesture::
posted by Splunge at 2:20 PM on February 4, 2014


Hmmmmm *narrows eyes, strokes chin with thumb and forefinger, nods slightly*

Hey, don't take my one move away from me! Actually, when I look at video of myself in seminar I look like I'm desperately flailing away at swarms of invisible airborne attackers. Nothing as elegantly controlled as the gestures illustrated here.
posted by yoink at 2:20 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


Excellent

But seriously, I use about 4 of the original 7. That is definitely not bragging.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 2:22 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


While reading this I am mimicking a scratching motion under my armpits while saying "oo! oo! oo!"

but i'm just a caveman
posted by mcstayinskool at 2:23 PM on February 4, 2014 [5 favorites]


Then there's the "Cup Stub of Chalk Loosely in Hand and Shake It About", but I think that might be deprecated in today's Expo Markers and Smartboard world.
posted by Rock Steady at 2:25 PM on February 4, 2014 [3 favorites]


I'm surprised the don't have Plucking the Plum of Knowledge, which is simply a slow, controlled inverse of the picking up small ideas. I've seen it in many a TED talk. When your point is concluded, you starburst your hand open, metaphorically drenching the audience in a shower of your brilliance.
posted by Diablevert at 2:28 PM on February 4, 2014 [7 favorites]


My dad has always been a master of the "dangle glasses loosely to your side to show you're listening" move.
posted by Think_Long at 2:29 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


> Check out my One Weird Gesture to express how I feel about the fact that ESC no longer stops animated gifs from looping in Firefox.

You have to use Shift+Esc now. If you appreciate that bit of advice you can give me back part of the thirty minutes I spent tracking that fact down.
posted by benito.strauss at 2:30 PM on February 4, 2014 [11 favorites]


Double guns with a wink always works for me.
posted by rocket88 at 2:33 PM on February 4, 2014 [20 favorites]


An article about hand gestures and not a single mention of genjutsu or invoking the Outer Gods? Lame.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 2:33 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


The Shelf Sweep looks kind of like an aggressive hula.
posted by Elly Vortex at 2:38 PM on February 4, 2014 [4 favorites]


Twinkles.

"wrap it up means you have been rambling and you need to make concise statements and wrap it up".
posted by bukvich at 2:38 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


I refute it thus! *****kicks ground *******
posted by wittgenstein at 2:38 PM on February 4, 2014 [11 favorites]


This is why I only deliver lectures while Vouguing
posted by The Whelk at 2:38 PM on February 4, 2014 [6 favorites]


I refute it thus! *****kicks ground *******
posted by wittgenstein 1 minute ago [+]


Eponywhatthehell?
posted by yoink at 2:41 PM on February 4, 2014 [3 favorites]


Pfft, Donald Rumsfeld can deploy hand gestures that you didn't even know you didn't know about (that's an unknown unknown).
posted by indubitable at 2:42 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


Real intellectuals only use these hand gestures while absentmindedly holding a laser pointer with the button depressed. I once saw a distinguished lecturer carve paths of destruction through the audience with repeated backhand slaps and shelf sweeps.
posted by RonButNotStupid at 2:43 PM on February 4, 2014 [6 favorites]


I've seen it in many a TED talk. When your point is concluded, you starburst your hand open, metaphorically drenching the audience in a shower of your brilliance.

Brilliance. Yes, we'll go with brilliance.
posted by indubitable at 2:44 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


Finger-tenting was ruined by Mr. Burns and is really more of a listening gesture than a lecturing one.

I don't do any of these gestures while speaking, I don't think. I'm more of a general hand-waver-abouter if I get excited. I think I do a sort of pinch-point thing when I'm trying to make a point.

Bill Clinton, of course, infected politicians after him with the thumb-point. Obama certainly does it.
posted by emjaybee at 2:47 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


Another one I used to dislike was the "pharaoh" where the speaker suddenly takes a lengthy pause to contemplate what they are about to write (or had just written) on the board while pressing the chalk or marker against their chin and muttering under their breath. I get that you're awesome enough to derive everything in the lecture without any notes, but in the interests of expediency and coherence, maybe you could do a little prep work?
posted by RonButNotStupid at 2:54 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


Is there a gesture for saying everything twice? Or am I missing some Javascript genius on that site?
posted by Kirth Gerson at 2:56 PM on February 4, 2014


I tend to flail about while speaking like a duck learning to take off from water at the best of times. When I'm trying to explain something people tend to unconsciously lean back though I've never bonked anyone whilst explaining in my life.

Also benito.strauss is a HERO OF THE PEOPLE.
posted by winna at 3:01 PM on February 4, 2014 [3 favorites]


I often get immediately pegged as a Smart Person, which is sometimes useful but mostly serves to distance me from people.

I spend a lot of time unpacking what it is about me that sends that message, now that I do a normal person job, am no more educated than anyone else I typically deal with, am not in gifted kid classes, do not really ever talk about Barthes or Foucault on a daily basis (anymore...), there are no teachers announcing things like "Sara got the only perfect score on this quiz!", or any of the usual Smart Kid signifiers I dealt with once upon a time.

I don't think I do any of these on the regular, but, I dunno, maybe?
posted by Sara C. at 3:02 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


I've never bonked anyone whilst explaining in my life

Mmm hmm, mmm hmmm. What about explaining something while bonking somebody, though?
posted by yoink at 3:03 PM on February 4, 2014


Whenever I have to present material I just pretend I'm a detective telling everyone at the mansion Who Done It and How.
posted by The Whelk at 3:10 PM on February 4, 2014 [4 favorites]


I alternate between kissy-face and pounding my shoe on the podium, but I'm still working on which is appropriate where.
posted by Navelgazer at 3:13 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


Whenever I have to present material I just pretend I'm a detective telling everyone at the mansion Who Done It and How.

Do you have luxurious moustaches whose pomaded ends you like to smooth while doing this?
posted by Diablevert at 3:13 PM on February 4, 2014


I am an anti-intellectual, as I use not one of these. Ever. Indeed, my go to is *talk to the hand*
posted by bearwife at 3:15 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


what they call The Dialectic I like to call the "Pick a ripe apple and examine it," which may be my Shenandoah Valley roots showing.

The emphatic tap-and-recoil is what totally seals The Point for me. Best performed wearing a bow tie.
posted by a halcyon day at 3:16 PM on February 4, 2014



Then there's the "Cup Stub of Chalk Loosely in Hand and Shake It About", but I think that might be deprecated in today's Expo Markers and Smartboard world.


My field mostly still uses chalkboards, so I'm pretty familiar with this one. Although it can rather easily turn into the "Accidentally Fling Chalk at Audience, Look Embarrassed" and also the "Pace Around the Board Wondering Where All the Chalk Has Gone" later on.

In other news.. Does anyone else find the Backhand Slap terribly aggressive? If someone did that while I was in the audience, I'd be embarrassed for them. What, your argument isn't good enough to fight on its own? You have to be a jerk about it?
posted by nat at 3:20 PM on February 4, 2014 [5 favorites]


Whenever I am invited to speak, I do a kind of Tai Chi meets breakdancer by way of Tom Cruise in Minority Report as interpreted by Shields and Yarnell. Which may be why I am not invited to speak.
posted by George_Spiggott at 3:21 PM on February 4, 2014


Then there's the "Cup Stub of Chalk Loosely in Hand and Shake It About", but I think that might be deprecated in today's Expo Markers and Smartboard world.

I'm just picturing the not-Ben-Stein teacher in Ferris Bueller. "In what... way...."
posted by Navelgazer at 3:23 PM on February 4, 2014 [3 favorites]


I've always liked the one where you slowly raise your middle finger while pretending to use a little crank to raise it with your other hand.
posted by Cookiebastard at 3:35 PM on February 4, 2014 [22 favorites]


Mmm hmm, mmm hmmm. What about explaining something while bonking somebody, though?

Senator, I plead the fifth.
posted by winna at 3:37 PM on February 4, 2014


> Also benito.strauss is a HERO OF THE PEOPLE.
posted by winna


So, you're giving me a thumbs up?
posted by benito.strauss at 3:38 PM on February 4, 2014


I'm doing the gesture where, when you steal someone else's point to build on it, you spread your hands palm up like a magician in their direction while saying 'of course, benito's point also leads us to the conclusion that ...'
posted by winna at 3:58 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


I often get immediately pegged as a Smart Person, which is sometimes useful but mostly serves to distance me from people.

I spend a lot of time unpacking what it is about me that sends that message, now that I do a normal person job, am no more educated than anyone else I typically deal with...

Yeah, MetaFilter was like my "small fish in a big sea" eye-opener actually. I was bullied for being "smart" and quickly learned that it was better to make friends by being cool and funny and "normal," and then after a long while let the intellectual fires burn. Usually they would too, or they would initiate it more quickly than myself, but also employing that cautious strategy. It sucks, for sure, because at a certain age just having some neat quirky idea or saying something silly can actually fuck you up for a long time because a bunch of fuck ups are up to bringing you down.

A sense of humor to me and the ability to spontaneously create powerful "inside jokes" is a sign of an immense form of a certain type of intelligence, if not just that foundational sparky brightness that a smart person after a certain age can identify in others within a few minutes. It's how smart interviewers hire smart people. Un-fucking-fortunately, you know the rest.

How long does it take for people to peg you? Seriously, as I typed the word "you" I was completely innocent. I SWEAR TO GOD and you believe me. And god is dead of course and the light is visible now, the nova is visible. Humor is it. Comedy is starting to dominate in a bleak shitty world. People desperately seek the smartest guy in the room in times of despair especially if they can relate as "otherwise equals." And there's nothing like finding a "barnacle" in the workplace who might be way fucking smarter than you but is awesome to talk to and totally keeps you sane.
posted by lordaych at 4:01 PM on February 4, 2014 [3 favorites]


I've always liked the one where you slowly raise your middle finger while pretending to use a little crank to raise it with your other hand.

Or the classic "do you like jazz"?

Or the lesser known but always effective "say stop"
posted by St. Peepsburg at 4:01 PM on February 4, 2014


The word "barnacle" might have multiple connotations actually, a friend of mine just forwarded me a passage awhile back:

“There's a certain, beautiful camaraderie that only exists between strangers imprisoned together in drab office parks with a bunch of fucking nightmare humans. You sniff out the only other reasonable people in the building and you cling to them, fiercely. Like a barnacle.”

You’re my barnacle bro

posted by lordaych at 4:05 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


Also, non-verbal communicator-types tell me all of the time that 90% of communication is non-verbal, but I'm like no, 90% of it is verbal because I am impervious to your gestures and only recognize facial expressions, and ignore the hand stuff because I have teh ADHD and that was one of my first skills to master to learn shits
posted by lordaych at 4:07 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


That's okay, the non-verbal communication types have already figured that out about you before you opened your mouth.
posted by The Whelk at 4:09 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


They often frame things plainly spoken as confrontational it seems, like the hands are weapons flashed around ominously in defensive and performative postures.
posted by lordaych at 4:10 PM on February 4, 2014


Counter to me: they are passive aggressive mofos and will spite their face first
posted by lordaych at 4:10 PM on February 4, 2014


I was bullied for being "smart" and quickly learned that it was better to make friends by being cool and funny and "normal," and then after a long while let the intellectual fires burn.

It's not so much about that stuff, but more about transactional type relationships where I need to be on a "just buddies shooting the shit" level with someone for Reasons. Often happens at work, or in other grownup contexts like getting my car serviced, being on friendly terms with neighbors, etc.

It turns out none of these gestures work for that.
posted by Sara C. at 4:12 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


What's the average time to getting the call-out? Like "yer smarter than yer own good, ya know that" and all that shit, like paraphrases on "your whole life is a waste because I am blown away by your brilliance about something you read on MetaFilter five minutes ago" or something? Being totally wired for words and a constantly-struggling low-talker introvert pushover who has had to figure out the balance between "he's so quiet" and "he's mean!" where people creep up
posted by lordaych at 4:20 PM on February 4, 2014


...it's usually to me a function of "the more you open your mouth the more they get to know you, duhhhh" and hand gestures I think don't mean jack shit honestly in those sorts of relationships, or deeper relationships, or whatever, if you speak calmly and intelligently and don't jump your shit all of the time. Equanimity over hand-jive
posted by lordaych at 4:22 PM on February 4, 2014


Try this next time for research purposes, just a spontaneous thought that I'm going to keep in mind maybe, if I etch it on my cornea somehow...this will be my last comment, I type too many things I noes:

Observe hand gesturing when encountering a new person and chart the type of relationship, progression, etc. I just realized I "create new encounters" at work all of the time while testing things in an EHR and wish it were that easy in the real world. But anyway, LOLz.

Notice whether your, that is, the two's of ya's hand gesture patterns, frequency, etc seem to diminish or increase over time as you get to know them, but better yet during each encounter from the first to the last.

Repeat for your whole life, submit results to lordaych@gmail.com
posted by lordaych at 4:28 PM on February 4, 2014


Writer Michael Herr, who worked closely with Stanley Kubrick on Full Metal Jacket, mentioned that Kubrick habitually and unconsciously employed a dismissive sweeping motion when criticizing an idea. Herr evocatively termed it, "the low country of the mind, where we don't want to be."
posted by ricochet biscuit at 4:28 PM on February 4, 2014 [4 favorites]


Let's all make up our own new and improved gestures and hit the TEDx circuit until they start getting appropriated by other lecturers and then do a TED talk about how awesome we were to inject our new handwaving paradigm into the communal brainspace.
posted by jason_steakums at 4:35 PM on February 4, 2014 [7 favorites]


Also this list of gestures is missing "mic drop"
posted by jason_steakums at 4:35 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


Some (all? most?) sign languages have this thing where you place nouns in space so you can refer back to that noun by referring back to that space. E.g., you sign "scary house" and direct your sign and attention up and to the right. Then when you sign "people visit, looking" you direct your sign and attention back to where you "placed" the house. Some of these gestures are doing the same thing: "I AM COMPRESSING MY CATEGORY INTO A BALL" (what they call the "shelf sweep") is one; you're figuratively creating something you can refer to non-verbally. So is Rock Steady's "multiple levels" gesture: you're saying that this category has a hierarchical relationship to that category. People make jokes about some cultures' (e.g., Italian, French, Jewish) use of gestures. I wonder if these cultures also use spatial techniques more frequently than their neighbours?
posted by Joe in Australia at 5:10 PM on February 4, 2014 [10 favorites]


The correct listener response to these lecturer gestures is a classic known as Pantomimed Masturbation.
posted by aubilenon at 5:18 PM on February 4, 2014 [7 favorites]


Celebrity occult hand signs.
posted by bukvich at 5:23 PM on February 4, 2014


Let's all make up our own new and improved gestures and hit the TEDx circuit until they start getting appropriated by other lecturers and then do a TED talk about how awesome we were to inject our new handwaving paradigm into the communal brainspace.

Goth dance hands! Find the bat! Hate the bat! Oh these headaches! Push away fog! Tangled in cobwebs and I'm The Spookiest Ocotopus You Ever Did See.
posted by The Whelk at 5:27 PM on February 4, 2014 [13 favorites]


Bear claws! Tusken raider staff brandish! Blowing "idea bubbles"! Subtle Hammer dance! HUMAN TORNADO! Fainting couch!
posted by jason_steakums at 5:29 PM on February 4, 2014 [4 favorites]


Let's all make up our own new and improved gestures and hit the TEDx circuit until they start getting appropriated by other lecturers

My Hands Covered In Blood, Oh God The Blood
Miniature Airplane Crash
Kitteh Makin' Biscuits
I Am Surrounded By Gnats
Jack Kirby Hands
posted by furiousthought at 5:30 PM on February 4, 2014 [15 favorites]


Let's all make up our own new and improved gestures and hit the TEDx circuit until they start getting appropriated by other lecturers

Air Semicolon
The Mystic and the Crystal Ball
Tarzanning
A Weird Salute
Watch 'Em Fing
posted by Rock Steady at 5:44 PM on February 4, 2014 [6 favorites]


The correct listener response to these lecturer gestures is a classic known as Pantomimed Masturbation.
Not to be confused with Pantomimed Stabbing a Vampire.
posted by Wolfdog at 5:47 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


My go-to for concluding any talk is to refer back to my key point with what I call the "Robert De Niro in Godfather II hiding next to the door with a pistol held at head height."
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 6:19 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


Real intellectuals only use these hand gestures while absentmindedly holding a laser pointer with the button depressed. I once saw a distinguished lecturer carve paths of destruction through the audience with repeated backhand slaps and shelf sweeps.


I once watched a grad student present a scheme for improving the stability of lasers, all while the spot from his pointer fluttered over the four walls and ceiling like it was desperate escape the room.
posted by Herr Zebrurka at 6:42 PM on February 4, 2014 [1 favorite]


Advanced power move: perform martial arts kata through the entire lecture (as long as the lecture relates in no way to martial arts).
posted by jason_steakums at 6:53 PM on February 4, 2014


As if Wired knows the difference between real and fake intellectuals.
posted by srboisvert at 7:26 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


Let's all make up our own new and improved gestures and hit the TEDx circuit until they start getting appropriated by other lecturers

-Throat-Grab Choking on the Agonizing Ridiculousness
-Sincere and Benevolent Dictator Palm-to-Heart
-Side Mouth Drool Trail of Vapidity
-Between the Fingertips Booger-Roll of Fine Distinction
-Thigh-Slap Giddyap of Hasty Temporizing
-Flames, Flames on the Side of my Face
posted by darkstar at 7:26 PM on February 4, 2014 [10 favorites]


Advanced Move Set: mime driving a bus through the entire lecture, making "stops" at each point in your lecture and addressing the audience as if over the bus' PA.
Bonus Gestures: "Turning This Tub Around" to digress with that cool steering wheel spinner knob, "Opening the Door" to let new ideas on, "Slamming on the Brakes" and "Laying on the Horn" for emphasis.
Killer Rhetorical Moves: "Next stop, [TOPIC]!", "And on your left, you'll see [TOPIC]!", "Last stop! Everybody out!" (finishing move).
posted by jason_steakums at 7:38 PM on February 4, 2014 [7 favorites]


I miss the "Piercing argument", where you hold up one hand with the tips of your thumb and index finger together, as if they were pinching a needle. Then you snap the hand forward like you were to pop a balloon and say: "That ... is the issue."
posted by Herr Zebrurka at 8:10 PM on February 4, 2014 [2 favorites]


The Advanced Talking Head: bob around trying to dance with an invisible lamp.
posted by The Whelk at 8:21 PM on February 4, 2014


whatever
posted by jammy at 5:46 AM on February 5, 2014 [4 favorites]


"The shelf sweep" looks like one of those particularly arduous Chopin etudes.
posted by seyirci at 7:04 AM on February 5, 2014 [2 favorites]


I have come to develop a reputation as "smart" at work, and I have lately come to use that reputation to terrify people into not saying stupid and obvious shit at meetings. I have also come to develop a reputation as a jerk. I am OK with all of this!
posted by Mister_A at 7:11 AM on February 5, 2014


Oh, on topic - my personal go-to gestures are "chopping block," "strangulation," and "j'accuse!"
posted by Mister_A at 7:12 AM on February 5, 2014 [2 favorites]


None of these gain you the respect of the Moonwalk.
posted by Navelgazer at 9:59 AM on February 5, 2014 [1 favorite]


Man, I gesture a lot, but I only use one of the ones from the article. Maybe that's why people don't initially think I'm smart (unless they're the type of people who think standoffish is snobbily "smarter than you," but that doesn't get a lot of like or respect.) I do use a lot of the ones people have mentioned above, especially the "levels" one, since my Chinese students are obsessed with improving their rankings and scores and I need to justify making them spend time practicing skills by tying them to their standardized test scores.

When I made my student teaching video, I found out that I look like a really, really sleepy hula dancer. I've been working on my posture and keeping my wobbly hips in check, but I've avoided taping myself teaching, so I don't know if it's worked.

A lot of my intentional classroom gestures use more than just my hands and are about turning the attention elsewhere: leaning toward a student speaker, holding my hands and body still and being quiet after I ask a question, modelling referring to a text or doing "I'm thinking" gestures to show that we don't always know the answer.

My gesture needs as a high school teacher are different than an academic who needs to assert their knowledge, even though it seems like teacher & professor would be similar. Likewise, I think a lot of these gestures would make you seem like kind of a know-it-all dick at a party or something.
posted by MsDaniB at 12:51 PM on February 5, 2014


My go-to for concluding any talk is to refer back to my key point with what I call the “Robert De Niro in Godfather II hiding next to the door with a pistol held at head height.”

You mean Bruno Kirby?
posted by letourneau at 1:22 PM on February 5, 2014


There's also 'The Lecturer Presents', also known as 'and I'll get to that point later'.

Raise both hands, flat and with fingers slightly spread, to either side of the face.

Turn them downwards from the elbow so that the fingertips indicate the listener/s and lets them know they're really in for the long haul here.
posted by HypotheticalWoman at 6:18 PM on February 5, 2014 [1 favorite]


New & Improved Gestures, Top Secret Belated Reprise Edition:

No, You Hold The Lit Stick Of Dynamite, I Insist
Swinging Tiny Fists At Older Brother As He Holds You Back By The Top Of The Head
Goddamn It Transformer Toys Are Stupid Anyway
Boop The Pretend Doggy Nose
I Crush The Beer Can Of Your Proposal Against My Forehead Of Intellect
posted by furiousthought at 7:35 PM on February 7, 2014 [1 favorite]


I've been watching China, IL because of the post, and I can clearly imagine Prof. Frank Smith using all of the improved gestures in this thread.
posted by jason_steakums at 8:22 PM on February 7, 2014


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