January 13, 2002

10:24 PM

Are sweeping generalisationsabout French 'arrogance' and 'cowardice' really justified? What if Rob had suggested that Satchel take a more aggressive 'German' stance on Bucky's beanbag borrowing antics?
posted by obiwanwasabi (23 comments total)

I surrender.
posted by sunsolid at 10:30 PM on January 13, 2002

Are sweeping generalisations about French 'arrogance' and 'cowardice' really justified?

The following is taken from an historical account of a battle that took place many years ago, between the English and the French:

FRENCH GUARD:
You don't frighten us, English pig-dogs! Go and boil your bottom, sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you, so-called Arthur King, you and all your silly English k-nnnnniggets. Thpppppt! Thppt! Thppt!... I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

From this speech, we may conclude that while the French are not necessarily cowardly, they are sometimes arrogant. Also, they are extremely silly.
posted by Optamystic at 10:53 PM on January 13, 2002

Ahh, this reminds me of the Simpsons episode, where Harry Truman commissions the $1 trillion bill. Truman says,

"This money is to help our allies, who fought so poorly, and surrendered so readily."
posted by insomnyuk at 11:53 PM on January 13, 2002

More seriously, France has had its share of military success as well. As one of my professors pointed out, if they hadn't been so fractured and disunite politically, they could possibly have held out against the Nazis much longer in WWII.
posted by insomnyuk at 11:55 PM on January 13, 2002

The basic problem of the French in WWII was that they hid in concrete boxes that had guns pointing towards Germany. The Germans went round the edge and attacked from the rear where the guns couldn't point. No amount of support for Renault, the French PM of the time, would have turned the Maginot Line into a good idea. An attack when all the Germans were in Poland however might have produced a different result.
posted by vbfg at 2:36 AM on January 14, 2002

Obiwanwasabi, I'm curious why you linked through Dilbert.com rather than the Comics.com archive.
posted by pheideaux at 2:50 AM on January 14, 2002

...not that there's anything wrong with that.
posted by pheideaux at 2:51 AM on January 14, 2002

they could possibly have held out against the Nazis much longer in WWII.

like longer than a week?
posted by quarsan at 3:55 AM on January 14, 2002

Like longer than a week or something, like hyeah as if!.........please excuse me while I get sick.
posted by johnnyboy at 4:00 AM on January 14, 2002

"I was shakin' like a french soldier"
- Lenny
posted by Mick at 5:25 AM on January 14, 2002

As one of my professors pointed out, if they hadn't been so fractured and disunite politically, they could possibly have held out against the Nazis much longer in WWII.

Genius. Also, if they had fought better, prepared better, had help from superheroes, or their enemies had choked on pretzels.
posted by rodii at 5:27 AM on January 14, 2002

"I was shakin' like a french soldier"

That is pure genius. I will be adopting that expression this year, alongside -

"..emptier than a Scottich pay-toilet" - Larry Burns
posted by Frasermoo at 5:31 AM on January 14, 2002

Can we possibly turn this into a xenophobic expression forum of some sort?

I think it would be healthy.
posted by Frasermoo at 5:32 AM on January 14, 2002

"Bonjourrrrr, ye cheese-eatin' surrender monkeys!"
-- Groundskeeper Willie, teaching French class on The Simpsons
posted by RylandDotNet at 5:36 AM on January 14, 2002

Actually, to update the French model, Satchel would have hired an unscrupulous dog to kill Bucky, then let the unscrupulous dog live in his doghouse and claim "sovereign immunity" in case the Animal Control officer started asking questions.
posted by basilwhite at 5:56 AM on January 14, 2002

"No amount of support for Renault, the French PM of the time..."

???
Renault was France's Primer Minister ?
I thought they designed cars !
posted by XiBe at 7:29 AM on January 14, 2002

One high point in French militarism: the Foreign Legion. Still active, btw... and still recruiting. Life there is hard, but they still don't ask many questions... sign in, stranger.

And let's not forget that Napoleon commanded a rather successful French Army back in the day.
posted by UncleFes at 8:23 AM on January 14, 2002

I just wanted to say that I think Get Fuzzy is the funniest cartoon since, well, since Calvin and Hobbes ended.

So, there, I said it.
posted by bshort at 9:29 AM on January 14, 2002

Personally, I'd like to ask some of the Jewish people of the time. Oh wait, they're all dead. Drat.
posted by haqspan at 9:49 AM on January 14, 2002

So Pierre Laval is representative of the whole fench people ?
posted by XiBe at 10:38 AM on January 14, 2002

How about the plains of Abraham? Now there was a stunning French Military failure. I visited Quebec City and ran up the hill and completely out of breath I surmised that the French troops must have been watching the Just for Laughs Comedy Festival at the time. They certainly were not defending their colony.
posted by srboisvert at 11:05 AM on January 14, 2002

Are sweeping generalisations about French 'arrogance' and 'cowardice' really justified?

Yes. Next question.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 11:07 AM on January 14, 2002

The Germans went round the edge and attacked from the rear where the guns couldn't point.

But how were the French to know? I mean, just because the German's went around the Maginot line and into France during WWI didn't mean that it would be ineffective again!

Renault was France's Primer Minister ?
I thought they designed cars !

They do, and they fall apart faster than their military...of course, their military used Renault tanks, trucks and other vehicles in WWII which may have helped.
posted by RevGreg at 2:50 PM on January 14, 2002