Comments on: Comments on 14018

Post number 14018

tranquileye — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 05:12:38 -0800

What is the worst sex scene of all time in Canadian literature? Sandra Martin of the Globe and Mail writes it is Leonard Cohen in Beautiful Losers: "Oh what a greasy tower he there massaged!. . .His right hand beneath the steering wheel, urging, urging, he seemed to be pulling himself into the far black harbour like a reflexive stevedore. . .F's eyes closed suddenly as if they had been squirted with lemon. . ."

By: tranquileye

tranquileye — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 05:16:25 -0800

And, yes, there is a Canadian literature.

By: dong_resin

dong_resin — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 06:04:22 -0800

I pictured Shanter doing the sex text excerpt from the FFP! Gah! Not the young Shatner, either! *bashes forehead with tack hammer* Make it stop! HELP ME!

By: MrBaliHai

MrBaliHai — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 09:45:03 -0800

dong_resin: I pictured the same thing except Shatner was reading the text in Esperanto. Pass the hammer over here when you're done with it...

By: dong_resin

dong_resin — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 10:02:20 -0800

*passes gore-soaked hammer to MrBaliHai* (whimpers) The hammer does nothing!

By: y2karl

y2karl — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 10:04:03 -0800

Eeyew--and to think I read that book in high school on the strength of the song "Suzanne,' which I knew only by an artsy Judy Collins rendition. A friend from then recently called me with a question about his Armenian violinist like I was into him and kept up--I told her, "Hey, that was before his first record came out..." Man, did that one suck. That voice and those crappy arrangements with the strings and the glockenspiels and the female back up vocals ala Percy Faith.... 'Peanut butter shit'... ::cringe::

By: MiguelCardoso

MiguelCardoso — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 10:16:26 -0800

Well I guess this means I'll have to hurry up with my long-coming Leonard Cohen FPP as there's no other recording artist in the world I love more. You philistines! You bastards - you've killed Lenny! How dare you allow our younger members think the man who's written the best love lyrics of our time, who's had more sex, booze, poetry, drugs, books and lives than all the rest of us put together, can't write a sex scene! I'm almost tempted to make it a "What's your favourite Leonard Cohen song?"; I'm that aggravated. So be warned.

By: maggieb

maggieb — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 12:52:29 -0800

My vote goes to the deliciously sardonic "Democracy" which I appreciate even more these past few months.

By: Hildago

Hildago — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 13:04:44 -0800

I agree with Miguel. Cohen's love songs and poems are by and large so nimble and perfectly phrased that if I play his albums to get myself in the mood to write some myself, it ends up discouraging me, because I know I can't say it any better. This passage was pretty kludgy and heavy-handed. If it's a fair representation of his longer works, I don't think I'll take the time. For the record (pun?), my favorites were always If it Be Your Will, and Night Comes On. Kind of weird love songs, but gorgeous. And on a different theme, Dress Rehearsal Rag.

By: lotsofno

lotsofno — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 13:42:03 -0800

i think i've only heard one song by him, but it still touched me. that's no way to say goodbye.

By: jfuller

jfuller — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 14:50:53 -0800

Worst Canadian sex scene? Don't know, haven't encountered it, hope I never do. But whatever it is, by definition it involves a moose. (P.S. posting from Georgia, I can't resist mentioning that many of you already know about the worst sex scene in Southern lit. -- it involves Clark Gable and Vivian Leigh and there's nothing more dreadful in any regional literature on earth -- not even if it was by Harry Crews and involved opossums.)

By: MrBaliHai

MrBaliHai — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 14:53:00 -0800

There's a big difference between writing good lyrics and writing good prose. Songwriting lends itself to metaphorical exaggeration, fiction does not. I love Leonard Cohen's songwriting, but I have no problems with declaring his literary work DOA.

By: rushmc

rushmc — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 15:21:54 -0800

The Future is terrific. I've never been able to sit all the way through any of his older stuff, though.

By: maudlin

maudlin — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 16:45:03 -0800

Worst Canadian sex scene? Don't know, haven't encountered it, hope I never do. But whatever it is, by definition it involves a moose. Wrong.

By: stavrosthewonderchicken

stavrosthewonderchicken — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 16:51:48 -0800

The now-deceased (murdered by his girlfriend) skipper on one of the sailboats I crewed on some years ago in Mexico was apparently a room-mate of Leonard Cohen at some point, although this may be at best apocryphal. As far as 'worst Canadian sex scene', well, I'd tell you some stories from the wonderchicken archives, but then I'd have to kill you.

By: Kafkaesque

Kafkaesque — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 18:04:51 -0800

My favorite Cohen, bar none, is "Famous Blue Raincoat". I got frustrated with Lenny when he decided to dump the guitars and just sing over a Casio Enka beat or whatever the hell that is. I haven't bought Ten New Songs because the previews I heard sounded crappy music-wise again. Too bad, because he was an excellent songwriter.

By: Optamystic

Optamystic — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 21:13:43 -0800

I love Cohen's music like I love few things on this, or any other planet. That said, Beautiful Losers is utterly embarrassing garbage. On the bright side, you can't go wrong with most of his albums. Oh, and Kafka...I really like the new album. Musically it's a little weak, but lyrically, the man's still got it.

By: y2karl

y2karl — Sun, 20 Jan 2002 21:25:10 -0800

Beautiful Losers and Richard Farina's Been Down So Long It Looks Like Up To Me were two books I read in high school: I have little recollection of either--for which I am ever so grateful. Oh, and add Demian to that list, too, gratitude included...

By: Mack Twain

Mack Twain — Mon, 21 Jan 2002 00:37:52 -0800

Leonard Cohen rocks! Waiting for the Miracle, Closing Time, Jazz Police...Lyrics, something to read on a dark moonless night.

By: argybarg

argybarg — Mon, 21 Jan 2002 08:26:10 -0800

Bob Dylan's another magnificent songwriter who never should have published a book.

By: y2karl

y2karl — Mon, 21 Jan 2002 09:17:28 -0800

Jesus Christ! Is that the whole book? Talk about your Internet piracy... And it does compare favorably with the Cohen quoted, I might add. Now I gotta call MrBaliHai--He Said BaliHai, heh heh heh heh hehe heh...-- about my head explodin'...