Diagnostic Emoji: Laughing Face with Tears + Clapping Hands
August 21, 2014 8:42 AM   Subscribe

 
"Lexi, Lexi, Queen of Hearts.
Sunlight enters, Moon departs.
Circle of flowers, sweets and love.
Raise your hand, touch from above.
Press the seashell to your ear.
Listen closely and OMFG IT’S A GUN.”

posted by threeants at 8:46 AM on August 21, 2014 [2 favorites]


My recently used emoji suggests that I don't use Emoji terribly often, and that I have a clear preference for communication using words in a language I don't understand.
posted by oceanjesse at 8:48 AM on August 21, 2014


Oh, and that I am totally winning at bathrooms.
posted by oceanjesse at 8:48 AM on August 21, 2014


My emoji use has gone way down since getting an Android phone with nearly everyone I know all still on iPhones. I was never a heavy user, but decided to all but quit after accidentally texting a coworker a steaming poop emoji instead of a bland smiley face.

So, helpful tip: if you receive a non sequitur poop from a friend, consider that they may be on a different brand of phone than you.

The struggle is real.
posted by phunniemee at 8:50 AM on August 21, 2014 [6 favorites]


So, helpful tip: if you receive a non sequitur poop from a friend, consider that they may be on a different brand of phone than you.

"oops sry this is super awkward but on my phone 'I don't think I love you anymore' is actually just how u make an emoji of a winking goat"
posted by threeants at 8:54 AM on August 21, 2014 [1 favorite]


TNI: The Conservatism of Emoji - "What habits of daily life do emoji promote, from the painted nails to the martini glasses? What behavior do they normalize?"
posted by the man of twists and turns at 8:55 AM on August 21, 2014 [3 favorites]


I keep saying this: You only need one emoji, ^(;,,;)^.

And you won't need that one for long.
posted by GenjiandProust at 8:57 AM on August 21, 2014 [3 favorites]


Ok, this one actually made me laugh out loud: A Wine glass + Skull combo, aka “The Cersei Lannister.”
posted by chatongriffes at 9:03 AM on August 21, 2014 [1 favorite]


"When I was growing up, I had a friend who’d always eat his vegetables. No whining, no fuss. Just down the hatch. His mom was so proud she’d let him play longer than all the other kids. Know what he did with that extra time? He burned shit."

I would read the heck out of a novel that started that way.
posted by mochapickle at 9:05 AM on August 21, 2014 [7 favorites]


Not to start a console war or the like, but, man, the Android Emoji (Kitkat) are so much cuter than the Apple emoji.
posted by maryr at 9:08 AM on August 21, 2014 [2 favorites]


I have absolutely no recollection of using the Eiffel Tower Rocketship but there it is.
posted by uncleozzy at 9:20 AM on August 21, 2014


So... how do you access emoji, on an iPhone?

Everyone's doing it but me.
posted by Flashman at 9:24 AM on August 21, 2014


Flashman: "So... how do you access emoji, on an iPhone?

Everyone's doing it but me.
"

💩
posted by Rock Steady at 9:25 AM on August 21, 2014 [2 favorites]


Not to start a console war or the like, but, man, the Android Emoji (Kitkat) are so much cuter than the Apple emoji.

They really are. Dat goat.
posted by phunniemee at 9:27 AM on August 21, 2014


I'm surprised at how random all of these are. Without looking I'm going to guess mine are the happy face and the smoochy-heart face followed by the hearts-in-eyes. I wish more people I texted with had iphones.
posted by bleep at 9:31 AM on August 21, 2014


🐒
posted by sexyrobot at 9:36 AM on August 21, 2014


Hmm. I send all the variations on the cat face A LOT to Shepherd, but this is probably not a surprise.
posted by Kitteh at 9:39 AM on August 21, 2014 [1 favorite]


Lost in Emoji Translation.
posted by Rock Steady at 9:46 AM on August 21, 2014 [2 favorites]


Eiffel Tower Rocketship

That's Tokyo Tower.
posted by Sangermaine at 10:24 AM on August 21, 2014 [1 favorite]


Oh god, all mine are poop and skulls. I don't want to know.
posted by mittens at 10:33 AM on August 21, 2014


The woman who uses lots of emojis showing facial expressions, and a jug of beer, values her relationships with others, especially long-term friends.

The woman who uses lots of girls-holding-hands emojis, and a martini glass, is gay and dating/meeting new people.

The man who uses lots of emojis of fruits and vegetables has a very high sex drive.

The woman who uses the pig and party and angel and travel emojis is basically a good girl who's been traveling and (by her standards) living it up.

That's all I got so far.
posted by subdee at 12:36 PM on August 21, 2014


A few years ago, when emoji were just getting popular, a boyfriend and I used to enjoy exchanging the occasional rebus message. Then he got really into it. Even though on the surface things seemed fine, I knew something was not right with the relationship. Then one day I realized that for a couple of weeks his texts were comprised entirely of pictures; he was so checked out he literally couldn't communicate with me using words. I brought it up. I said that after a while, a picture of a heart didn't really seem the same as "I love you." He went back to using words for about a week. Maybe five days. We broke up shortly after that. Kind of interesting.
posted by Room 641-A at 3:15 PM on August 21, 2014


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