The Old Woman With No Teeth
September 15, 2014 9:22 AM Subscribe
PodCastle 328: The Old Woman With No Teeth
Story by Patricia Russo. Read by Wilson Fowlie and M.K. Hobson. Originally published in Clockwork Phoenix 4, edited by Mike Allen.
When The Old Woman With No Teeth decided to have children, she didn’t go about it in the usual way. Well, really, what else could you expect from The Old Woman With No Teeth? If she ever did anything the usual way, even boiling a pot of water, the world might start spinning widdershins on its axis.
"Now you just stop that. I can read perfectly well, you impudent ragger. Set down what I told you, and don’t believe all the stories you’ve heard about me."
There are many stories about The Old Woman With No Teeth, but people should not believe all of them. The most popular one is that she wore away her teeth by chewing a tunnel to the six-sided world. Nobody knows if this story is true. Many people have looked for the passageway she is supposed to have gnawed through reality, but none of the venturers have managed to pinpoint it.
"None of the ones who’ve come back, you mean. Silly bastards."
Story by Patricia Russo. Read by Wilson Fowlie and M.K. Hobson. Originally published in Clockwork Phoenix 4, edited by Mike Allen.
Not to be confused with the Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives in Your Home.
posted by offalark at 12:02 PM on September 15, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by offalark at 12:02 PM on September 15, 2014 [2 favorites]
If she ever did anything the usual way, even boiling a pot of water, the world might start spinning widdershins on its axis.
The world already does spin widdershins on its axis.
posted by The Tensor at 12:40 PM on September 15, 2014 [1 favorite]
The world already does spin widdershins on its axis.
posted by The Tensor at 12:40 PM on September 15, 2014 [1 favorite]
Phew, for a minute I thought it was about me.
/yeth, just losth my lasth molar lasth week
posted by infini at 1:15 PM on September 15, 2014
/yeth, just losth my lasth molar lasth week
posted by infini at 1:15 PM on September 15, 2014
The Tensor: The world already does spin widdershins on its axis.
Only if you're watching from above the North Pole. From above the South Pole it turns clockwise.
But yes, my inner editor also stopped at that sentence.
posted by Kattullus at 1:34 PM on September 15, 2014 [1 favorite]
Only if you're watching from above the North Pole. From above the South Pole it turns clockwise.
But yes, my inner editor also stopped at that sentence.
posted by Kattullus at 1:34 PM on September 15, 2014 [1 favorite]
Only if you're watching from above the North Pole. From above the South Pole it turns clockwise.
Deasil.
posted by jeather at 1:50 PM on September 15, 2014
Deasil.
posted by jeather at 1:50 PM on September 15, 2014
Once I bit a star
Heat sink explodes my wisdom
Iron fillings spin
posted by Mblue at 3:30 PM on September 15, 2014 [1 favorite]
Heat sink explodes my wisdom
Iron fillings spin
posted by Mblue at 3:30 PM on September 15, 2014 [1 favorite]
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posted by sammyo at 10:08 AM on September 15, 2014 [1 favorite]